Mostly I just kept breathing deeply and moving forward. Though on an emotional level I had a tremendous amount going on, my rational mind knew that the "greasespot by midnight stuff" was complete crap.
I went out to my car one morning shortly after leaving TWI only to find a boot on the back wheel of my car. I was parked in my assigned parking spot. I had moved in the complex 3 weeks earlier (my move was days before Christmas). There was a parking sticker I was supposed to put on my car. It was in a folder in my boxes which were not completely unpacked.
I was LIVID that this happened when I was parked in MY parking spot. The apartment complex hired a towing company to search through the parking lot at night to look for the dumb stickers. GRRRR!!!! If I had a problem with someone parking in my spot, I would have called them....grrrr!
Anyway, I called the towing company and the guy was clear up in North County of San Diego. I lived in the eastern part of the county. It was during morning rush hour traffic, and it would take him an hour or more to get to me to take the boot off. I became even more LIVID.
I spent my hour huffing and puffing and cussing on a thread here on GSC wondering if I was being punished for leaving TWI.
Certainly my situation was no where as detrimental as the things you experienced, but isn't it amazing the voodoo that twi had on us? THAT was the lie.
I've seen some christians have the same thoughts when bad things happen. My sister's mother-in-law had comments like this when we found out my sister's baby had a stroke. "Oh, the Devil is working overtime." I think a lot of people just HAVE to have an answer to everything and a place to assign things that happen. I also don't think the Devil has as much power as some christians want to give him. I am glad to say that I now think sometimes chit happens, and I don't have to have an answer for everything. I think some situations happen to help us grow (I'm not saying God makes them happen). But I know that I've grown since my divorce. I know that my experiences in TWI helped form who I am today (no credit to TWI of course).
I think it depends on your thinking. I really believe that what you think about and harbor in your heart of hearts , dwell on non stop, eventually will pop out somewhere in your life. I really believe the carma thing is real but ONLY to a cerain point. The positive/negative energy that is with in you attracks energy of its own kind.
Now, I don't believe anyone could had anything to do with the hurricanes and the like.
When things like that happen to me - the personal stuff, sickness, injuries, etc. I ask myself what's going on upstairs in that big mushy brain of mine. Sometimes, it could be that life just happened but most of the time I know it's has something to do with my emotions and there's something I need help getting over.
You were going through a divorce - a nasty one at that - I think that counts as emotional!!!!!!!! Besides all the twi stuff that you were going through.
And his disciples asked him, saying, Master, who did sin, this man, or his parents, that he was born blind?
3 Jesus answered, NEITHER HATH THIS MAN SINNED, NOR HIS PARENTS: but that the works of God should be made manifest in him.
Jesus didn't want sin to be the focus for his disciples. He wanted God's love and healing wholeness to be the main issue. Wasn't that the entire reason for Jesus to do all that he did for us in the first place.
That's best answer I can give - sin is not the focus. After all, you didn't leave GOD- you left THE WAY INTERNATIONAL. We all know that there is nothing in the word against doing that.
Less than a year after we were kicked out of the family corps, we found I had a benign tumor the size of a jumbo chicken egg. The doc said it had to have been growing at least two years to be that size. (That would include my wow year.) I worried like crazy until I found out it was benign that it was what I got for being kicked out of the way over false accusations of our homosexuality.
I don't think I can put into words how that felt to have been kicked out over false accusations and turned over to Satan.
We had one bad health situation pop up the first year after leaving TWI. Family and non TWI friends and aquintances were so helpful and kind. If that situation had happened while in TWI, our creepy leadership would have been involved and in charge. No one would have brought us a frozen lazagna or sent flowers and a card. The bad health would have been due to our inner wickedness.
Since then, every time something bad has happened in life, big or small, I have been thankful I wasn't experiencing the situation in TWI, where it would be met coldly and with harshness, even heart wrenching things like the death of a parent.
We've also had many wonderful and happy things happen since leaving, so I guess it balances out.
For example shortly after my ex moved out and I was officially "out" of TWI I had:
- A car crash (not my fault)
Sounds like someone elses "believing" was not up to snuff
- Hurricane Charlie
My dear Belle, You live in Fla. Hurricane capital of the good old US of A if not the world. Sort of like living at the North Pole and not expecting a snow storm.
- The flu so bad I really did think I was going to die
Been there done that. I wonder if God made the flu (or let the devil make it) so you would think you walked away from His ministry?
- Hurricane Frances
See above
- Sprained both my ankles
Well then explain to me the hemoroids I got on LEAD
- Hurricane Jean
Hmmmm, This is the 3rd one that came up. Maybe it is you
Amazing the grip they had on us, isn't it? :blink: It's so surreal now to look back on it. I was constantly looking over my shoulder just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I still catch myself doing it every once in a while....it's crazy.
My two year anniversary of being out and free is coming up in July. Maybe that's why these thoughts are resurfacing....I've heard anniversaries can be difficult for some people and last year it was extremely difficult for me.
I know what TWI taught was b.s. and I know my life is 10 Ba-zillion times better than it was when I was married and oppressed by TWIt doctrine and micromanagement. I just can't believe that these thoughts still creep up on me.
Abigail I suppose that's what I'm doing, too. I keep reminding myself that TWIt doctrine was b.s. and then run through the list of things that have gone right since leaving.
WN Believe it or not, I remember that thread now that you mention it. :) It just sucks that we even had to go through that whole thought process to begin with.
Strange One - I'm taking up collects to send me to Mexico this year for hurricane season - La Jolla de Misbehavin'. You can send your contributions to: Belle, PO Box 666, Orlando, FL 32806.
djs - Thank you. That was very nice and comforting to read. :)
Garth you shore know how to make a gal feel spay-shul! Thank you! It does sound rather arrogant, doesn't it? All for ME?? That'll be an easy one to remember when those thoughts creep up on me.
Bow I can't even begin to imagine how upsetting and terrifying that must have been for you! I'm glad you're okay now and isn't it amazing how thankful we can be now that we were kicked out?
Bramble Reading your post reminded me of the surgery I had while I was still "in" - not one person called to check on me, sent a card, dinner, nada..... a non-TWI co-worker brought me dinner and my office mates sent flowers and a card. There were personal cards on my desk waiting when I got back to work.
Those things I listed before also taught me how wonderful my non-TWIt neighbors and friends are and how it feels when people do things because they CARE and LOVE you. I had people at my house constantly cooking, cleaning, visiting, just checking on me, running errands for me, etc. Just amazing all the things they did to help me out without my even asking....heck, they did stuff I would have never dreamed of asking someone to do.
BIG - BIG DIFFERENCE between TWIts and the "egg sucking world", eh?
JustLoafing - You better watch it or I'm going to come stay with you and Radar for the whole season!!
The curse of TWI does not exist: that was the mental gift given to us by a fanactical mindset.
Took me a while to believe that: I got through it simply because I had too. I also had to realize that it was okay to change my mindset. You know-"I know they were wrong, but what if their not? Then I'm really screwing myself!"
I starting doing some things just to prove it. I got a cat. I listened to the radio and read newspapers. I allowed myself to make friends with co-workers who happened to be gay. I went to the movies. I read fiction. I had fun with non-believers.
Lightening didn't strike, the ceiling didn't collapse, I haven't come down with horrible diseases that I haven't recovered from.
What they did to me was a lot more deeply imbeded. The rest of it-the curse of the greasespot-is just surface garbage. Life happens-people you love die, jobs get won and lost, the weather can knock you for a loop-and nothing you can do (or did) stops it from happening. My victory was in recognizing it and stop looking for the boogeyman in the closet.
I love what Garth said..."Wow! ... All this stuff? ... Just for you?? Instead of feeling cursed, it oughtta make you feel *special*."
Fer real!!! The very idea that we saw such things as directed specifically at us...OMG! what twits we were!
But, girlfriend, I was there in my brain! I nearly gave up and died over believing some similar crap.
In twi our 'circle' was very small. We didn't associate with non-innies very much...and even then we shunned close contact...and gawd forbid a non-innie should touch us! Is it any surprise that we didn't get as sick as an innie as we did as an outie? We just weren't exposed to as much...and when we were, we took great precautions to avoid 'catching' anything (usually 'devil spirits'...but that practice also served to keep us from being as exposed to germs, too). And the absolutely anal cleanliness we had to live up to in twi? Well, it kept us from being exposed to germs, but I do know that it also was a major contributor to the auto-immune disorders we now suffer...as did the rest of the anal living in a bubble mentality.
Add to this the adamant denial that we were ever sick. So many disorders, diseases and underlying health problems were just blatantly ignored and/or denied. People are now paying harsh prices for that mentality.
There were some parents who even refused to allow their children to be immunized...because it was 'fear'.
So, for me and mine, twit brain about germs and cleanliness was initially preventive...which led to a false sense of 'health'...but in the end was damaging to our immune systems. And the 'believing' of denial kept many health time bombs hidden...which led to far more problems than if we had just had regular checkups every year.
What I'm saying is that had we stayed in twi, these things would have shown up, anyway.
Hurricanes and car wrecks? Chit happens. And it happens to everybody everywhere regardless of twi. That we ever thought that it happens because of not being in twi is testimony to the cult mentality of twi.
Sprained ankles and other such things? Accidents. To think we were not subject to accidents in twi is to deny the accidents that did happen...which is what twit brain told us to do.
Which brings me to another point...
These threads are full of the things that did happen while in twi.
More than anything else, I think that being an innie and reading what happens in twi regardless of 'being in the household' is helpful to getting out of twi if/when one wants to take that step.
And reading that we have survived, and how we survived, helps, too.
But also reading about those who have not survived and how we all come together in such situations...that's one thing twi never, ever taught...or allowed...so it's gotta be helpful...if for no other reason than to see that death is something to be mourned...and that mourning is OK.
I know toppie!!! I really tried to ignore it...now I'm gonna try to deny it....
LOL
BTW...
I did exactly the same thing you did! I purposely did 'bad' things like have gay friends, watch 'off' movies (watching What Dreams May Come and Stigmata freaked me out because I thought fer shure I'd be full of debbul spurts afterwards), even 'went over' to paganism for awhile.
And the absolutely anal cleanliness we had to live up to in twi? Well, it kept us from being exposed to germs, but I do know that it also was a major contributor to the auto-immune disorders we now suffer...as did the rest of the anal living in a bubble mentality.
Add to this the adamant denial that we were ever sick. So many disorders, diseases and underlying health problems were just blatantly ignored and/or denied. People are now paying harsh prices for that mentality.
There were some parents who even refused to allow their children to be immunized...because it was 'fear'.
So, for me and mine, twit brain about germs and cleanliness was initially preventive...which led to a false sense of 'health'...but in the end was damaging to our immune systems. And the 'believing' of denial kept many health time bombs hidden...which led to far more problems than if we had just had regular checkups every year.
What I'm saying is that had we stayed in twi, these things would have shown up, anyway
i just sorta held my breath, for awhile. stayed diligent and alert in my life. one day became one week. One week became one month. Months became a year. NOTHING. No greasespot!! In fact, i was advancing in life, instead of being tied down by meetings, classes, witnessing, set-ups, moving, etc. I became unfettered and have been sprinting ever since!! i have no regrets, not worried...AT ALL. If im wrong, well...at least I AM HAPPY, and can look myself in the mirror, EVERYDAY and be satisfied with my life. When in The Way, that was not possible. And if im punished for THAT, then God can BITE IT!! and its not like, i am a slug in life. Ive studied and read about MY interests, and stuff i care about...deeply. in doing that, i still continue to help people that WANT my help or advice. Banging on a 100 doors on a Sunday afternoon is no where NEAR as fulfilling as that!!
Belle, I dunno, I just left and never looked back. No, my life was still screwed up in ways because of faulty thinking, but eventually I learned how to communicate with others without looking for a debbil under every rock and began to recover.
I'm sorry all of that happened to you so soon after leaving.
Add to this the adamant denial that we were ever sick. So many disorders, diseases and underlying health problems were just blatantly ignored and/or denied. People are now paying harsh prices for that mentality.
There were some parents who even refused to allow their children to be immunized...because it was 'fear'.
So, for me and mine, twit brain about germs and cleanliness was initially preventive...which led to a false sense of 'health'...but in the end was damaging to our immune systems. And the 'believing' of denial kept many health time bombs hidden...which led to far more problems than if we had just had regular checkups every year.
Think of all the bleach we inhaled, couldn't be healthy.
I know for both hubby and I (he is type 2 diabetes, I have a bizarre immune related disease) fatigue was one of the first symptoms. both of us had fatigue for at least a year before we were diagnosed. Did we pay attention? Not even a little. Gotta go go go. Can't be slothful!!! Go until you collapse.
I purposely did 'bad' things like have gay friends, watch 'off' movies (watching What Dreams May Come and Stigmata freaked me out because I thought fer shure I'd be full of debbul spurts afterwards), even 'went over' to paganism for awhile.
I've had a blast! And I've learned a whole lot.
In fact....dare I say it...I'm better all around!
Isn't it so funny what you thought was "bad". I went to a Halloween party full of gay guys the year after I left. I got an eye full to say the least....LOL! They are definitelly party guys. But I had fun, and I saw they are real people too.
I still can't watch scarey movies because I have problems getting gorey images out of my mind after I let them in. The devil spirit thing doesn't bother me anymore. I know they aren't always watching me.
Funny, djs, but this thread sent my brain went right to the story of the man born blind, even before i read your post. Here's the next part of it, from memory (someone see how close I got it):
3 Jesus answered, neither hath this man sinned, nor his parents: but that the works of God should be made manifest in him,
I must work the works of Him who sent me, while it is day; the night cometh, when no man can work.
In other words, Christ saw bad things happen, and thought, "What can I do to make it better? That's my job -- to fix the bad stuff."
TWI sees bad things happen, and thinks, "Hah! Serves them right for not believing God. I have a jack, but I'm not gonna help them!"
I thought the love of God "rejoiceth not in iniquity."
We were so busy with our family of six, plus by the time we left, there was so much OFF the Word going on In TWI, it didn't seem they had too much right about Real Life anyway.
The part that took time getting rid of were the thoughts of 'the world' :(
ALL those OUTSIDE the household of TWI were either working For the Devil or being Used by the Devil... I had very little trust for anyone.
I've been brought to tears MANY times just hearing songs, seeing people living, shopping, hearing how friends of the family were volunteering and helping people...
My life from 1981 was manipulated. I learned some wonderful things, but inside a twisted setting.
My curse was now 'eating my words'. Friends & Family had been patient as I forced the things I was learning on them. They waited patiently as I ignored them, their birthdays and their serious questions.
I am haunted by the hardness I developed listening and learning the doctrine of TWI.
I'm glad this curse is 'washable'... Working here to get ALL the layers off... all those thick layers :(
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Abigail
Mostly I just kept breathing deeply and moving forward. Though on an emotional level I had a tremendous amount going on, my rational mind knew that the "greasespot by midnight stuff" was complete crap.
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Nottawayfer
Belle,
I went out to my car one morning shortly after leaving TWI only to find a boot on the back wheel of my car. I was parked in my assigned parking spot. I had moved in the complex 3 weeks earlier (my move was days before Christmas). There was a parking sticker I was supposed to put on my car. It was in a folder in my boxes which were not completely unpacked.
I was LIVID that this happened when I was parked in MY parking spot. The apartment complex hired a towing company to search through the parking lot at night to look for the dumb stickers. GRRRR!!!! If I had a problem with someone parking in my spot, I would have called them....grrrr!
Anyway, I called the towing company and the guy was clear up in North County of San Diego. I lived in the eastern part of the county. It was during morning rush hour traffic, and it would take him an hour or more to get to me to take the boot off. I became even more LIVID.
I spent my hour huffing and puffing and cussing on a thread here on GSC wondering if I was being punished for leaving TWI.
Certainly my situation was no where as detrimental as the things you experienced, but isn't it amazing the voodoo that twi had on us? THAT was the lie.
I've seen some christians have the same thoughts when bad things happen. My sister's mother-in-law had comments like this when we found out my sister's baby had a stroke. "Oh, the Devil is working overtime." I think a lot of people just HAVE to have an answer to everything and a place to assign things that happen. I also don't think the Devil has as much power as some christians want to give him. I am glad to say that I now think sometimes chit happens, and I don't have to have an answer for everything. I think some situations happen to help us grow (I'm not saying God makes them happen). But I know that I've grown since my divorce. I know that my experiences in TWI helped form who I am today (no credit to TWI of course).
Edited to add a line of clarification.
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Tom Strange
I always wondered why we've had so many hurricanes in the past few years...
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djs
I think it depends on your thinking. I really believe that what you think about and harbor in your heart of hearts , dwell on non stop, eventually will pop out somewhere in your life. I really believe the carma thing is real but ONLY to a cerain point. The positive/negative energy that is with in you attracks energy of its own kind.
Now, I don't believe anyone could had anything to do with the hurricanes and the like.
When things like that happen to me - the personal stuff, sickness, injuries, etc. I ask myself what's going on upstairs in that big mushy brain of mine. Sometimes, it could be that life just happened but most of the time I know it's has something to do with my emotions and there's something I need help getting over.
You were going through a divorce - a nasty one at that - I think that counts as emotional!!!!!!!! Besides all the twi stuff that you were going through.
This is getting long - I'll start a new one.
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GarthP2000
Wow! ... All this stuff? ... Just for you??
Instead of feeling cursed, it oughtta make you feel *special*.
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djs
JOHN 9:2,3
And his disciples asked him, saying, Master, who did sin, this man, or his parents, that he was born blind?
3 Jesus answered, NEITHER HATH THIS MAN SINNED, NOR HIS PARENTS: but that the works of God should be made manifest in him.
Jesus didn't want sin to be the focus for his disciples. He wanted God's love and healing wholeness to be the main issue. Wasn't that the entire reason for Jesus to do all that he did for us in the first place.
That's best answer I can give - sin is not the focus. After all, you didn't leave GOD- you left THE WAY INTERNATIONAL. We all know that there is nothing in the word against doing that.
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bowtwi
Less than a year after we were kicked out of the family corps, we found I had a benign tumor the size of a jumbo chicken egg. The doc said it had to have been growing at least two years to be that size. (That would include my wow year.) I worried like crazy until I found out it was benign that it was what I got for being kicked out of the way over false accusations of our homosexuality.
I don't think I can put into words how that felt to have been kicked out over false accusations and turned over to Satan.
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Bramble
We had one bad health situation pop up the first year after leaving TWI. Family and non TWI friends and aquintances were so helpful and kind. If that situation had happened while in TWI, our creepy leadership would have been involved and in charge. No one would have brought us a frozen lazagna or sent flowers and a card. The bad health would have been due to our inner wickedness.
Since then, every time something bad has happened in life, big or small, I have been thankful I wasn't experiencing the situation in TWI, where it would be met coldly and with harshness, even heart wrenching things like the death of a parent.
We've also had many wonderful and happy things happen since leaving, so I guess it balances out.
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justloafing
For example shortly after my ex moved out and I was officially "out" of TWI I had:
- A car crash (not my fault)
Sounds like someone elses "believing" was not up to snuff
- Hurricane Charlie
My dear Belle, You live in Fla. Hurricane capital of the good old US of A if not the world. Sort of like living at the North Pole and not expecting a snow storm.
- The flu so bad I really did think I was going to die
Been there done that.
I wonder if God made the flu (or let the devil make it) so you would think you walked away from His ministry?
- Hurricane Frances
See above
- Sprained both my ankles
Well then explain to me the hemoroids I got on LEAD
- Hurricane Jean
Hmmmm, This is the 3rd one that came up. Maybe it is you
My answers are in bold
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Belle
Amazing the grip they had on us, isn't it? :blink: It's so surreal now to look back on it. I was constantly looking over my shoulder just waiting for the other shoe to drop. I still catch myself doing it every once in a while....it's crazy.
My two year anniversary of being out and free is coming up in July. Maybe that's why these thoughts are resurfacing....I've heard anniversaries can be difficult for some people and last year it was extremely difficult for me.
I know what TWI taught was b.s. and I know my life is 10 Ba-zillion times better than it was when I was married and oppressed by TWIt doctrine and micromanagement. I just can't believe that these thoughts still creep up on me.
Abigail I suppose that's what I'm doing, too. I keep reminding myself that TWIt doctrine was b.s. and then run through the list of things that have gone right since leaving.
WN Believe it or not, I remember that thread now that you mention it. :) It just sucks that we even had to go through that whole thought process to begin with.
Strange One - I'm taking up collects to send me to Mexico this year for hurricane season - La Jolla de Misbehavin'. You can send your contributions to: Belle, PO Box 666, Orlando, FL 32806.
djs - Thank you. That was very nice and comforting to read. :)
Garth you shore know how to make a gal feel spay-shul!
Thank you! It does sound rather arrogant, doesn't it? All for ME?? 
That'll be an easy one to remember when those thoughts creep up on me.
Bow I can't even begin to imagine how upsetting and terrifying that must have been for you!
I'm glad you're okay now and isn't it amazing how thankful we can be now that we were kicked out?
Bramble Reading your post reminded me of the surgery I had while I was still "in" - not one person called to check on me, sent a card, dinner, nada..... a non-TWI co-worker brought me dinner and my office mates sent flowers and a card. There were personal cards on my desk waiting when I got back to work.
Those things I listed before also taught me how wonderful my non-TWIt neighbors and friends are and how it feels when people do things because they CARE and LOVE you. I had people at my house constantly cooking, cleaning, visiting, just checking on me, running errands for me, etc. Just amazing all the things they did to help me out without my even asking....heck, they did stuff I would have never dreamed of asking someone to do.
BIG - BIG DIFFERENCE between TWIts and the "egg sucking world", eh?
JustLoafing - You better watch it or I'm going to come stay with you and Radar for the whole season!!
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topoftheworld
The curse of TWI does not exist: that was the mental gift given to us by a fanactical mindset.
Took me a while to believe that: I got through it simply because I had too. I also had to realize that it was okay to change my mindset. You know-"I know they were wrong, but what if their not? Then I'm really screwing myself!"
I starting doing some things just to prove it. I got a cat. I listened to the radio and read newspapers. I allowed myself to make friends with co-workers who happened to be gay. I went to the movies. I read fiction. I had fun with non-believers.
Lightening didn't strike, the ceiling didn't collapse, I haven't come down with horrible diseases that I haven't recovered from.
What they did to me was a lot more deeply imbeded. The rest of it-the curse of the greasespot-is just surface garbage. Life happens-people you love die, jobs get won and lost, the weather can knock you for a loop-and nothing you can do (or did) stops it from happening. My victory was in recognizing it and stop looking for the boogeyman in the closet.
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CoolWaters
I love what Garth said..."Wow! ... All this stuff? ... Just for you?? Instead of feeling cursed, it oughtta make you feel *special*."
Fer real!!! The very idea that we saw such things as directed specifically at us...OMG! what twits we were!
But, girlfriend, I was there in my brain! I nearly gave up and died over believing some similar crap.
In twi our 'circle' was very small. We didn't associate with non-innies very much...and even then we shunned close contact...and gawd forbid a non-innie should touch us! Is it any surprise that we didn't get as sick as an innie as we did as an outie? We just weren't exposed to as much...and when we were, we took great precautions to avoid 'catching' anything (usually 'devil spirits'...but that practice also served to keep us from being as exposed to germs, too). And the absolutely anal cleanliness we had to live up to in twi? Well, it kept us from being exposed to germs, but I do know that it also was a major contributor to the auto-immune disorders we now suffer...as did the rest of the anal living in a bubble mentality.
Add to this the adamant denial that we were ever sick. So many disorders, diseases and underlying health problems were just blatantly ignored and/or denied. People are now paying harsh prices for that mentality.
There were some parents who even refused to allow their children to be immunized...because it was 'fear'.
So, for me and mine, twit brain about germs and cleanliness was initially preventive...which led to a false sense of 'health'...but in the end was damaging to our immune systems. And the 'believing' of denial kept many health time bombs hidden...which led to far more problems than if we had just had regular checkups every year.
What I'm saying is that had we stayed in twi, these things would have shown up, anyway.
Hurricanes and car wrecks? Chit happens. And it happens to everybody everywhere regardless of twi. That we ever thought that it happens because of not being in twi is testimony to the cult mentality of twi.
Sprained ankles and other such things? Accidents. To think we were not subject to accidents in twi is to deny the accidents that did happen...which is what twit brain told us to do.
Which brings me to another point...
These threads are full of the things that did happen while in twi.
More than anything else, I think that being an innie and reading what happens in twi regardless of 'being in the household' is helpful to getting out of twi if/when one wants to take that step.
And reading that we have survived, and how we survived, helps, too.
But also reading about those who have not survived and how we all come together in such situations...that's one thing twi never, ever taught...or allowed...so it's gotta be helpful...if for no other reason than to see that death is something to be mourned...and that mourning is OK.
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topoftheworld
Cool, we're thinking alike again!
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CoolWaters
I know toppie!!! I really tried to ignore it...now I'm gonna try to deny it....
LOL
BTW...
I did exactly the same thing you did! I purposely did 'bad' things like have gay friends, watch 'off' movies (watching What Dreams May Come and Stigmata freaked me out because I thought fer shure I'd be full of debbul spurts afterwards), even 'went over' to paganism for awhile.
I've had a blast! And I've learned a whole lot.
In fact....dare I say it...I'm better all around!
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templelady
CW, I never saw it this clearly before , Thanks
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Chief Cornerstone
nice thread...
i just sorta held my breath, for awhile. stayed diligent and alert in my life. one day became one week. One week became one month. Months became a year. NOTHING. No greasespot!! In fact, i was advancing in life, instead of being tied down by meetings, classes, witnessing, set-ups, moving, etc. I became unfettered and have been sprinting ever since!!
i have no regrets, not worried...AT ALL. If im wrong, well...at least I AM HAPPY, and can look myself in the mirror, EVERYDAY and be satisfied with my life. When in The Way, that was not possible. And if im punished for THAT, then God can BITE IT!! and its not like, i am a slug in life. Ive studied and read about MY interests, and stuff i care about...deeply. in doing that, i still continue to help people that WANT my help or advice. Banging on a 100 doors on a Sunday afternoon is no where NEAR as fulfilling as that!!
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waterbuffalo
Belle, I dunno, I just left and never looked back. No, my life was still screwed up in ways because of faulty thinking, but eventually I learned how to communicate with others without looking for a debbil under every rock and began to recover.
I'm sorry all of that happened to you so soon after leaving.
Take care,
wb
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Bramble
Think of all the bleach we inhaled, couldn't be healthy.
I know for both hubby and I (he is type 2 diabetes, I have a bizarre immune related disease) fatigue was one of the first symptoms. both of us had fatigue for at least a year before we were diagnosed. Did we pay attention? Not even a little. Gotta go go go. Can't be slothful!!! Go until you collapse.
I am so glad I'm out.
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Nottawayfer
Isn't it so funny what you thought was "bad". I went to a Halloween party full of gay guys the year after I left. I got an eye full to say the least....LOL! They are definitelly party guys.
But I had fun, and I saw they are real people too.
I still can't watch scarey movies because I have problems getting gorey images out of my mind after I let them in. The devil spirit thing doesn't bother me anymore. I know they aren't always watching me.
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justloafing
Ohh IMO I think that is more age. :)
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Nottawayfer
JL!!!
Are you trying to say I'm getting old???
LOLOL!!
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justloafing
hmmmmmmmm, Older?
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shazdancer
Funny, djs, but this thread sent my brain went right to the story of the man born blind, even before i read your post. Here's the next part of it, from memory (someone see how close I got it):
In other words, Christ saw bad things happen, and thought, "What can I do to make it better? That's my job -- to fix the bad stuff."
TWI sees bad things happen, and thinks, "Hah! Serves them right for not believing God. I have a jack, but I'm not gonna help them!"
I thought the love of God "rejoiceth not in iniquity."
Regards,
Shaz
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SafariVista
We were so busy with our family of six, plus by the time we left, there was so much OFF the Word going on In TWI, it didn't seem they had too much right about Real Life anyway.
The part that took time getting rid of were the thoughts of 'the world' :(
ALL those OUTSIDE the household of TWI were either working For the Devil or being Used by the Devil...
I had very little trust for anyone.
I've been brought to tears MANY times just hearing songs, seeing people living, shopping, hearing how friends of the family were volunteering and helping people...
My life from 1981 was manipulated. I learned some wonderful things, but inside a twisted setting.
My curse was now 'eating my words'. Friends & Family had been patient as I forced the things I was learning on them. They waited patiently as I ignored them, their birthdays and their serious questions.
I am haunted by the hardness I developed listening and learning the doctrine of TWI.
I'm glad this curse is 'washable'... Working here to get ALL the layers off... all those thick layers :(
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