I just had the minister from the church come for a visit to "smooth things over". He asked what he could do to "work things out" so that we would stay at the church. So it seems like an olive branch has been offered which is a good sign.
I asked if he would get together with myself, my husband and the youth leader in question to see if we can come to an amicable co-existance given our differences. He agreed to that, so maybe we don't need to go church hunting afterall.
If the soultuion involves YOU changing YOUR mind - then don't bother. Go church hunting. It took you long enough to get back to a place where you are wanting more growth in your spiritual life - but know what you know - if you know what I mean. Don't compromise yourself.
Sounds like the youth pastor is rather full of himself. He owes you and your family an apology, for starters.
I thought I'd found a decent church - they were trinitarian, but didn't shove it down your throat. I could deal with it but still cringed at times when they wrongly divided the Word. Then the pastor got canned for plagerism - oh, boy! The interim pastor is very trinitarian - he does shove it down your throat. That's when Chas went *poof* from that church.
Moral of the story: Even within the same denomination there are various degrees of zealous twits - some who drink the Kool Aid, and others who don't... it's up to you to decide what you can put up with.
He agreed to that, so maybe we don't need to go church hunting afterall.
You are thinking of going back?
After what that guy said to your son and accused you of?
Each to his own I suppose.
I had a similar experience about 5 years after I left TWI-It took me about that long to even consider going to a church. I found a Vineyard Church in the early 90's that I liked and liked the people so I fell right in with them. I was volunteering , mowing the lawns, in a few groups, dropping money in the basket every week --all sorts of stuff.
It was a small church but it took about 5 months to get an appointment to see the Pastor. The whole appointment lasted about 5 minutes when he found out I was with TWI, and after directly and pointedly questioning me I said I didnt understand the trinity ( I didnt say i didnt believe it I said I didn't know ) , he went on the heresy jag, told me his congregation didnt have place for me, and said I should "go back where i came from".
All this from a guy who spent 2 out of 3 Sundays preaching on unconditional love.
That was my very last bout of institutionalized christianity, personally I have better things to do with my time than to be told Im possessed (like i was in TWI) or condemned to the ninth circle of hell (like I was in this church) while all the while they are taking a good portion of my time and money. I gave it almost 20 years of my time, if thats the best that they can do -then no thanks for me.
Ever notice that with groups like this (be it TWI or mainstream churches) is that when they do give you the heave-ho out the door, they never offer to refund your money, nor thank you for all the time and effort in helping their church.
Oh gollygosh...I thought it was JUST twi ( and the off-shoots)that were so 'gung-ho' with their trinitarian, JCING, DANA, etc.. !! Hi JW.. welcome to Christianity today.. well over half the Christians in church today are asleep and the rest will 'label' you as heretic, wolf in sheeps clothing etc.. if you don't slide in with their beliefs, that's just the way it is.
BTW...GS Cafe is an 'ekklesia' as well and fits into the above category.
I was relieved when I told a bible mentor at our Baptist church that "I don't know about believing the trinity, and that considering where I came from (cult), it was hard for me".
She said, "just go to God, and have HIM show you what you need to do, and what He wants you to learn.''
They don't shove it down anyones throat, and personally, I like Jesus being my intersessor for once!
"I thought I'd found a decent church - they were trinitarian, but didn't shove it down your throat. I could deal with it but still cringed at times when they wrongly divided the Word. Then the pastor got canned for plagerism - oh, boy! The interim pastor is very trinitarian - he does shove it down your throat. That's when Chas went *poof* from that church.
Moral of the story: Even within the same denomination there are various degrees of zealous twits - some who drink the Kool Aid, and others who don't... it's up to you to decide what you can put up with. "
LOL Chas.
The good thing is that the majority of people in this church don't really give a hang one way or the other whether I believe in the trinity or not. But like you say there's always going to be someone.
I thought about giving up and running away, but instead I decided to try and practice what they preach about love and patience and see where it leads.
If I leave it just gets swept under the carpet just like it did when we all left TWI. If I stay I get a chance to show what the love of God truly is.
I don't intend on compromising what I believe, but I do intend on being wise on what I say and how I say it.
The minister of the church seems to genuinely want to work things out. I am having a meeting with the youth minister to try and work things out with him too.
mstar1 quote:
You are thinking of going back?
After what that guy said to your son and accused you of?
Don't worry I don't intend to let him walk all over me, and I WILL expect an apology from him, which I am told he is willing to give. So as I said I will wait and see.
I definitely intend on becoming a hell of a lot more involved in the youth group activities. :)
Apology, I think demanding his removal as Youth director is more like it
NO one, Has the right to disrespect a parent to their children, And I mean No one, Saying your mother is a Heretic ( hooker, Junkie what ever the appellation ) is JUST PLAIN WRONG. An individual who has so little self control that he would spew such venom at a child in his care should immediately be removed from any position which gives him authority over children not his own
JWitt, I'm too new out of TWI to be able to offer any suggestions or help. These are wise folks here and you've gotten some great things to think on. :)
I just want to say WELCOME!!!! We actually have some splayds in the Cafe for our Aussie patrons to make you feel at home.
"I had a similar experience about 5 years after I left TWI-It took me about that long to even consider going to a church. I found a Vineyard Church "
Which proves what someone else was saying - that even within a denomination there will be differences.
I went to a Vineyard Church right out of TWI and had no problems with the pastor. He knew my background - in fact I chose that church because I knew the pastor before I left TWI. He was very aware of TWI - his college roommate had made it his life's mission to help get people out.
Has anyone else had this experience trying to fit into mainstream churches after leaving TWI?
Welcome to the Cafe, JWitt - here's a big cup of French Vanilla Cappuccino...I think you might like it here - relax - think out loud - don't worry about fitting' in here and you'll fit in just fine!
Welcome to the GreaseSpot café! It is always great to meet someone new. I read with much interest your recent predicament at church. I had a similar problem after I was marked and avoided from the Way. I still believed most of the doctrine from twig, but I knew I needed the fellowship of other Christians. So after some shopping around I ended up in a Presbyterian church.
I find it interesting that the trinity was the issue that caused a problem. At my church everyone says they believe that doctrine, but no one seems to talk about it. My problem is predestination. Fellow churchgoers seem to discuss it incessantly. However because I am known as “free will Johnny” they seem to explain my beliefs as a lack of spiritual maturity on my part. So what I do is to play along and do my own study of the bible. I rejoice when the pastor teaches from the scriptures and despair when I talk to church friends who are not sure that they are saved. So I suggest that you decide how good is the fellowship at that church? If it is tight and warm and encouraging you to grow spiritually then you might want to not tell all that you know (isn’t that one of the keys to walking in the spirit?). However I doubt that you have anything to worry about. Most churches will bend over backwards to accommodate thoughtful, believing and loving Christian families.
So how did your meeting go with the pastor and the youth leader?
I have yet to have the promised meeting with the youth leader.
I went to church on Sunday (mainly for the sake of my son) and received much love and support from the people there including the minister. The youth leader was there and sat behind me, as all of my sons friends were sitting with us as a show of support. The youth leader and I exchanged friendly hellos and goodbyes and that was that.
I believe our minister (Ken) was meeting him directly after church to discuss our "situation", but I havn't heard anything yet. I've been told "he's a busy man you know".
Recommended Posts
ChasUFarley
If the soultuion involves YOU changing YOUR mind - then don't bother. Go church hunting. It took you long enough to get back to a place where you are wanting more growth in your spiritual life - but know what you know - if you know what I mean. Don't compromise yourself.
Sounds like the youth pastor is rather full of himself. He owes you and your family an apology, for starters.
I thought I'd found a decent church - they were trinitarian, but didn't shove it down your throat. I could deal with it but still cringed at times when they wrongly divided the Word. Then the pastor got canned for plagerism - oh, boy! The interim pastor is very trinitarian - he does shove it down your throat. That's when Chas went *poof* from that church.
Moral of the story: Even within the same denomination there are various degrees of zealous twits - some who drink the Kool Aid, and others who don't... it's up to you to decide what you can put up with.
But stay true to you.
And welcome!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
coolchef1248 @adelphia.net
the trinity..
i don't know if jesus was god or if god was jesus god
and i don't care.
i just know i love to worship god and jesus in no set order
Link to comment
Share on other sites
mstar1
You are thinking of going back?
After what that guy said to your son and accused you of?
Each to his own I suppose.
I had a similar experience about 5 years after I left TWI-It took me about that long to even consider going to a church. I found a Vineyard Church in the early 90's that I liked and liked the people so I fell right in with them. I was volunteering , mowing the lawns, in a few groups, dropping money in the basket every week --all sorts of stuff.
It was a small church but it took about 5 months to get an appointment to see the Pastor. The whole appointment lasted about 5 minutes when he found out I was with TWI, and after directly and pointedly questioning me I said I didnt understand the trinity ( I didnt say i didnt believe it I said I didn't know ) , he went on the heresy jag, told me his congregation didnt have place for me, and said I should "go back where i came from".
All this from a guy who spent 2 out of 3 Sundays preaching on unconditional love.
That was my very last bout of institutionalized christianity, personally I have better things to do with my time than to be told Im possessed (like i was in TWI) or condemned to the ninth circle of hell (like I was in this church) while all the while they are taking a good portion of my time and money. I gave it almost 20 years of my time, if thats the best that they can do -then no thanks for me.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
GarthP2000
Ever notice that with groups like this (be it TWI or mainstream churches) is that when they do give you the heave-ho out the door, they never offer to refund your money, nor thank you for all the time and effort in helping their church.
<_<
Link to comment
Share on other sites
allan w.
Oh gollygosh...I thought it was JUST twi ( and the off-shoots)that were so 'gung-ho' with their trinitarian, JCING, DANA, etc.. !! Hi JW.. welcome to Christianity today.. well over half the Christians in church today are asleep and the rest will 'label' you as heretic, wolf in sheeps clothing etc.. if you don't slide in with their beliefs, that's just the way it is.
BTW...GS Cafe is an 'ekklesia' as well and fits into the above category.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
bliss
I was relieved when I told a bible mentor at our Baptist church that "I don't know about believing the trinity, and that considering where I came from (cult), it was hard for me".
She said, "just go to God, and have HIM show you what you need to do, and what He wants you to learn.''
They don't shove it down anyones throat, and personally, I like Jesus being my intersessor for once!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
JWitt
Quote from ChasUFarley
"I thought I'd found a decent church - they were trinitarian, but didn't shove it down your throat. I could deal with it but still cringed at times when they wrongly divided the Word. Then the pastor got canned for plagerism - oh, boy! The interim pastor is very trinitarian - he does shove it down your throat. That's when Chas went *poof* from that church.
Moral of the story: Even within the same denomination there are various degrees of zealous twits - some who drink the Kool Aid, and others who don't... it's up to you to decide what you can put up with. "
LOL Chas.
The good thing is that the majority of people in this church don't really give a hang one way or the other whether I believe in the trinity or not. But like you say there's always going to be someone.
I thought about giving up and running away, but instead I decided to try and practice what they preach about love and patience and see where it leads.
If I leave it just gets swept under the carpet just like it did when we all left TWI. If I stay I get a chance to show what the love of God truly is.
I don't intend on compromising what I believe, but I do intend on being wise on what I say and how I say it.
The minister of the church seems to genuinely want to work things out. I am having a meeting with the youth minister to try and work things out with him too.
mstar1 quote:
You are thinking of going back?
After what that guy said to your son and accused you of?
Don't worry I don't intend to let him walk all over me, and I WILL expect an apology from him, which I am told he is willing to give. So as I said I will wait and see.
I definitely intend on becoming a hell of a lot more involved in the youth group activities. :)
Regards, JWitt
Edited by JWittLink to comment
Share on other sites
templelady
Apology, I think demanding his removal as Youth director is more like it
NO one, Has the right to disrespect a parent to their children, And I mean No one, Saying your mother is a Heretic ( hooker, Junkie what ever the appellation ) is JUST PLAIN WRONG. An individual who has so little self control that he would spew such venom at a child in his care should immediately be removed from any position which gives him authority over children not his own
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Belle
JWitt, I'm too new out of TWI to be able to offer any suggestions or help. These are wise folks here and you've gotten some great things to think on. :)
I just want to say WELCOME!!!! We actually have some splayds in the Cafe for our Aussie patrons to make you feel at home.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Abigail
"I had a similar experience about 5 years after I left TWI-It took me about that long to even consider going to a church. I found a Vineyard Church "
Which proves what someone else was saying - that even within a denomination there will be differences.
I went to a Vineyard Church right out of TWI and had no problems with the pastor. He knew my background - in fact I chose that church because I knew the pastor before I left TWI. He was very aware of TWI - his college roommate had made it his life's mission to help get people out.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
T-Bone
Welcome to the Cafe, JWitt - here's a big cup of French Vanilla Cappuccino...I think you might like it here - relax - think out loud - don't worry about fitting' in here and you'll fit in just fine!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
E. W. Bullinger
Dear J Witt:
Welcome to the GreaseSpot café! It is always great to meet someone new. I read with much interest your recent predicament at church. I had a similar problem after I was marked and avoided from the Way. I still believed most of the doctrine from twig, but I knew I needed the fellowship of other Christians. So after some shopping around I ended up in a Presbyterian church.
I find it interesting that the trinity was the issue that caused a problem. At my church everyone says they believe that doctrine, but no one seems to talk about it. My problem is predestination. Fellow churchgoers seem to discuss it incessantly. However because I am known as “free will Johnny” they seem to explain my beliefs as a lack of spiritual maturity on my part. So what I do is to play along and do my own study of the bible. I rejoice when the pastor teaches from the scriptures and despair when I talk to church friends who are not sure that they are saved. So I suggest that you decide how good is the fellowship at that church? If it is tight and warm and encouraging you to grow spiritually then you might want to not tell all that you know (isn’t that one of the keys to walking in the spirit?). However I doubt that you have anything to worry about. Most churches will bend over backwards to accommodate thoughtful, believing and loving Christian families.
So how did your meeting go with the pastor and the youth leader?
E. W. Bullinger
Link to comment
Share on other sites
JWitt
Thanks for the warm welcomes!
I have yet to have the promised meeting with the youth leader.
I went to church on Sunday (mainly for the sake of my son) and received much love and support from the people there including the minister. The youth leader was there and sat behind me, as all of my sons friends were sitting with us as a show of support. The youth leader and I exchanged friendly hellos and goodbyes and that was that.
I believe our minister (Ken) was meeting him directly after church to discuss our "situation", but I havn't heard anything yet. I've been told "he's a busy man you know".
Oh well I will patiently wait.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.