I know men who cheated on their wives when they were “fat” with child. Is it just America?
How horrible... unthinkable... what an A*S... that's a whole other topic right there...
As far as FAT goes...
Dated a guy from Iraq once... (kinda weird to think of now).. but they seemed to like their women bigger...also carried guns, and if you spent the night, the grandmother would sit by the head of your bed all night to make sure you were safe~
Also dated a guy from Greece once... they also seemed to like to feed their woman until they were good and fat.
And 'people' offering advise is rude. My Mother would be one of those 'trying to help'...
But, honestly, I don’t like being fat… and have packed on 20 since a back injury… working to get it off… just don’t feel as good~
We're fataphobic... and narrow minded... can't see past the physicals... it's not just fat either, it's also relating to ugly, plain, poor, unlearned, and in some cases Modern ;)
Dot, sometimes folks are just plain rude. My ex used to say all the time to me, "I'd rather be hungry than fat."
There was a time where people were constantly asking me when I was "due". It was terribly upsetting and I'd come home in tears with nothing that would make me feel better. I finally got peeved enough to decide to give these people a lesson in manners that they would NEVER forget. I planned in depth what I would do and shared it with my ex, who was usually left to pick up the pieces after these incidents.....despite his intense dislike of body fat (except, I was okay... right....)
Anyway.....after planning my attack it took a while before I had the chance to put the plan in place....but it was at the pet store on a very busy week-end and we're in line to check out. The girl behind me asks when I'm due....I start crying and loud as I can muster....I just had a miscarriage...how DARE you ask some woman you don't know when her baby is due?????
She shrunk to 2mm and started stammering and apologizing. My ex put his arm around me and told her that no one should ask a woman when she's due unless she knows beyond the shadow of a doubt that the woman is actually pregnant. All this in front of a whole store full of customers.
I was really crying, though....I had been working very hard on my diet and was sick and tired of people asking me that question. Since getting out of TWI and getting divorced, though, I've lost 25 lbs....easiest thing I've done since getting rid of the stress, guilt and oppression....go figure!!
Maybe, when they say something to you, you should offer to buy them a copy of Amy Vanderbilt's book of manners. ;)
Four days after bow jr was born, I was asked when the baby was due. I matter-of-factly told them he was born 4 days ago. They were embarassed. I was not.
A couple years ago a neighbor "lady" told my then 8-year-old friend that I was nasty because I was fat. My dear little friend was so upset she had to call me and tell me right away.
I told her not to let it bother her, that yes, I WAS fat, but I could diet and lose weight anytime I chose to, but the ugliness in that woman was TO THE BONE! (I then explained that by that I meant forever!)
EXCELLENT response! I bet that woman never asked any woman again when she is due.
I saw an acquaintance in the mall a few years ago who I knew was expecting and asked her when she was due. She pointed to the baby in the stroller beside her. "About two weeks ago," she replied. I don't ask anymore.
Fat seems to be the safe thing to make fun of anymore, now that Americans have gotten politically correct and have cut back on racial, ethnic, and sexual preference jokes. It usually doesn't bother me ( I am overweight) unless I think I have been discriminated against because of my weight. And anyone who's been overweight for a period time knows that happens too often.
I've been overweight for most of my life. Right now, I'm in a downward trend and intend to keep it that way. I am also diabetic.
I think the difference is, as opposed to hair color, the size of one's nose, et al, weight is regarded as something an individual can do something about. And while one can get cosmetic surgery for nature's oversights, weight is something you can control. It's a matter of how badly you want it.
Belle...you really are more genteel and southernly in your ways than I am!!! Of course...you're a Belle...and I'm just a dam*ed Yankee. Sigh.
My perfect comeback?
"Wow. I'm am so very flattered that you are so drawn to looking at my body. But, really honey, you ain't ever gonna *uck me, so step back and pop those nasty lusting eyes right back in your head."
I'd like to make it clear, I wasn't condoning the snide remarks, just examining the thought process.
1. One person sees another.
2. First person makes quick mental calculation of second person's general appearance.
3. Concludes they aren't as fat as second person.
4. Obviously, this means they are 'better' than second person.
5. In a misguided attempt to 'help' second person, says something they 'think' will help them.
It could also be, first person is rather insecure about their appearance. Therefore, first person is actually trying to make THEMSELVES feel better by making the snide remark.
Admittedly though, there does seem to be a 'rudening' of America. Usually, this is done under the guise of 'help', but is probably more an attempt for the commenter to feel better about themselves rather than genuinely encouraging the object of their comments.
Belle, your spouse reminds me of mine....lol I remember him angrily growling at me onetime during our first year, that *you had DAMNED well not ever get fat* in a very ominous threatening sort of way.....
I took him so seriously and absolutely accepted that he was right to feel that way fully believing the consequences would be harsh and justified.....lol we were such idiots.
Problem was....whenever I got nice and skinny....I ended up preggers....go figure
I am short so of course every lb shows.....after 7 children I`ll never have that svelt little figure I had bk (before kids).
I do karate 5 hrs a week...more push ups and sit ups, jumping jacks, running you name it than anybody I know, dig fence posts, pour concrete, am carefull about what I eat, and am in the best physical shape with more capability than I have ever had in my life .....and yet I weigh nearly double my little twiggy 80s self.
It is hard to reconcile my minds picture of myself and the gal I see looking back at me from the mirror.
Solved that one though..... I don`t have any mirrors that show below the shoulders hee hee.
My Mom is the worst.... I will work hard all day with little or nothing to eat and will sit down with a plate of sketti, only to have to listen to her go on about how I will never lose any weight if I keep eating pasta....or put cheese on it.....lord help me if I have a piece of bread.....(this from the woman who eats an entire giant bag of candy bars at one sitting....lol)
Or I shouldn`t have that second slice of pizza....blah blah.
I remember one summer, I worked hard, I walked 5 miles or more every morning and rowed around the lake every afternoon, I had no sweets or sugar and lost a pound a day for the entire summer....I wanted to suprise mark when I got home.....
I was preggers within 3 weeks.....I have never tried since....who the hell has 24 hours a day to devote to exercise anyway?
It costs extra money to buy the diet foods, I am talking veggies and salads....it costs money to buy the cloths and shoes that make you look good, it costs money for the nice hair and make up....money that spouse doesn`t want to part with....and he has a problem with the way I have let myself go??? He damned well better not say so to me grrrrr
I have come to the place that it just plain doesn`t matter anymore what other people see.....because I am learning to like what is inside myself for the first time ever....
To my spouses horror...last month a had my hair shaved ...left a little on the top because I was wearing karate helmets, riding helmets, working in the viscious heat...and was becoming physically ill.........It was so funny, when Mark expressed his disgust.......I was suprise to find that it just didn`t matter...my mother moaned about how I looked so *dyke* ...I thought screw her, put on my favorite pair of ear rings slicked what was left of my hair back with gell and headed out the door head held high feeling like a million bucks :)
Guys I am sorry for the cruel things people say.....some of you are so much more clever than me.
Bow I`d like to thrash that neighbor for not seeing how beatifull you really are.
Maybe offer her a gift certificate to the local optomotrist to get her eyes checked and some badly needed glasses??
She went from about a size 6 to maybe a 10 or 12 at the age of 50. Her husband then used to make fun of her all the time and eventually divorced her.
She was SO upset and ya know what her mother did? She said it is your own fault as you became fat.
Oh my God, 3 children, a house, two very top-notch people and FAT is going to do them in?
HE is a General in the armed forces and she is a lawyer. They have two kids in med school and one in law school. Janice is "girl scout" pure, generous and kind. Amd this butt hole is upset that at the age of 50/55 she is in a 9-10 sometimes 11-12 pair of pants.
So, how come its okay for his nose hair to be long enough for braids and because she is no longer 22 he finds that as fault?
You can correct stinky feet, bad breath, poor choices in clothes but perfect strangers do not mention things like that as they know it is rude.
So, why do people think it is okay to speak to a stranger about their weight? I heard people say to a stranger in a restroom, "My daughter had a weight problem until she went to Weight Watchers."
IT is like with all the sins in the world, the worst is gaining weight in the good old USA. A thin slut would be better than a slightly chubby wonderful woman.
Another one of my friends was married to a lawyer. She help him start the firm I eventually worked at. One day, he brings home a business associate with an insurance firm. This woman was a thin, very unattractive phone solicitor. And the man? He left his angel of a wife after 35 years for the skinny ugly, been with the football team woman. When his intelligent wife and their two sons (who became ministers -- good ones) were thrown away like garbage.
The big sore spot in the marriage? She gained 20 pounds over the course of 35 years. How dare she?
BTW, Janice the lawyer works at a place where a lot of the woman are younger and thinner than she. One day, there was a lunch for the whole group and she happened to get on the elevator with a judge and they entered the lunch area together. HE looked all around the room then at her.
And he said, "Ya know in this whole room you are the fattest person here."
I think he knew better. IT seems to be accepted to be mean to anyone who gains weight.
Well...the latest (comprehensive) report out is that overweightness and obesity is due not to a lack of exercize but due more to the fact of over-eating !
To me it makes sense doesn't it ? You don't see many people on hunger strikes dying of high colestrol.
Bless you Allan, may you never gain 20 pounds as you get old just because you are getting older. May you never be judged on your hairline or your waistline. And yeah, you may want to duck there ol' chap.
Maybe not, all the FAT People like food too much to throw it at you. Anyone have a brick?
Another story:
Oh here is one, a short chubby woman was walking down and aisle at the pharmacy. Minding her own business. She was dressed well, and looked as if she just came from work. Perhaps a hard day as well -- you all work. Work is not always easy.
Anyway, she was the only one in the aisle and the teen working announced over the speaker "Susquash now in aisle three. Susquash now walking in aisle three."
Of course people went to LOOK in aisle three and there was this perfectly dressed woman in her PLUS size clothes just standing there like a deer in the headlights.
I remember one summer, I worked hard, I walked 5 miles or more every morning and rowed around the lake every afternoon, I had no sweets or sugar and lost a pound a day for the entire summer....
So --- Rascal ---- If'n you were to keep this up ---
Well...the latest (comprehensive) report out is that overweightness and obesity is due not to a lack of exercize but due more to the fact of over-eating !
To me it makes sense doesn't it ? You don't see many people on hunger strikes dying of high colestrol.
First, could you post a link to that "latest" and "comprehensive" report?
Second, you're showing your ignorance here. One of my best friends doesn't even weigh 100 lbs soaking wet, and she has high cholesterol. Genes play a big role in both obesity and hypercholestrolemia.
I've struggled with my weight my whole life. I come from a long line of overweight people and have pictures as far back as my ggg-grandparents as proof.
Do I overeat sometimes? Of course I do, but certainly not always. So do some of my thin friends. If I ate like they do, I'd weigh 800 lbs!
I read a study once (can't post a link--it was years ago and wasn't online) in which thin people and fat people were kept on the exact same diet, the exact same exercise regimen, under controlled conditions (i.e., they all stayed in the same place and were closely monitored so there was no chance of cheating). The thin ones stayed thin and the fat ones got fatter. Genetics.
That doesn't mean we should just give up, eat everything in sight and say, "Oh well, it's in my genes." But it goes a long way toward explaining why losing weight and keeping it off is so difficult for so many of us.
(I think if I had a dollar for every pound I've ever lost, I could be retired and sitting on a beach somewhere sipping iced tea and reading a book.)
And sushi, in one of my many forays into the world of Weight Watchers, it was a standing joke how we women hated how much easier it was for the men to lose weight. Because of their higher ratio of muscle to fat and, typically, their higher rate of metabolism, they ran circles around us in terms of pounds lost each week. Women would say, "I lost 3 lbs this week," and we'd all applaud. Men would say, "I lost 10 lbs this week," and we'd applaud for them too, but the applause was usually accompanied by an audible groan. :)
I wish you well in your efforts, though, sushi. Diabetes is nothing to mess with, and I'm glad you're working at being healthier.
I swear sometimes, if one more person asks me if I'm anorexic I'm gonna SCREAM! Yes, I'm 5 feet even and 84 pounds. I figure that's better than some years ago when I dropped down to 72 pounds .. which they don't seem to 'hear' of course. They tell me to eat more or give me suggestions on foods to eat. This is even after I tell them I have Crohn's Disease and my guts are so full of scar tissue that I don't absorb any nutrition from the food I eat, no matter what it is. It doesn't matter what I eat, if I'm flaring, which I almost always am since I can't afford the meds I should take to get into remission .. I'm not gonna gain weight.
So don't sweat it ladies. We skinny people get the same crap from the nannies of the world. They are going more and more after what people eat, now that they have pretty much destroyed the world of smokers by making them 3rd class citizens and made the legal habit something illegal to do in most public places. I post on a few smokers rights forums and we are seeing the nannies/antis all now going after people who are overweight and using the same psudo-science strategy they did to make smokers hated. They have no morals. They use false medical reports, false tests, just whatever it takes to 'prove' their point. Their latest goal is to get very high taxes put on soda, just like they did cigarettes. *sigh*
There is no reasoning with this type of person. They know what is best for your life and are very outspoken about it. I wish they would all crawl back into the hole they came out of and leave everyone alone to live their lives the way they want. When we want their opinion, we know how to ask for it.
I am sure some thin ones get it, but from my view a lot of too thin people are told they look great, or "I wish I were skinny." "Oh you should eat!" but in a more loving manner, almost like a compliment.
"Honey, you will waste away, eat something." "Look at that cute little waist."
All the while most women wished they looked like you.
Nobody that I have ever met, looks at a fatty and says boy, I wish I looked like you -- except for an even fatter person.
FAT people are at the mercy of a society where looks are everything.
FAT = Lazy or they "just do not care" etc.
IF you say "My friend has a great personality." Most side comments are, "then she must be fat."
I dunno Allan, but I can about garantee that with four karate classes of a couple hours each a week with all of the physical labor of mixing comcrete and digging that I do at work, not to mention the physically exhausting demands of working with livestock...fencing, mucking.....Have you ever hauled and hay out of the field and stacked it?
I can just about bet that I am the most physically active person here....and yet with all of that and a reasonable diet, I am 75 lbs heavier than when I got married.
I eat way less than when I was 105 and yet exercise to the point of physical exhaustian on a daily basis....and it makes no difference.
That is what age/genetics and a slowing metabolism will do for you :(
Dot, I am really suprised at how superficial people are...your friends stories are really sad.
In MY opinion, a guy that would dump his wife over a few lbs sure wasn`t much of a husband anyway.
I post on a few smokers rights forums and we are seeing the nannies/antis all now going after people who are overweight and using the same psudo-science strategy they did to make smokers hated. They have no morals. They use false medical reports, false tests, just whatever it takes to 'prove' their point. Their latest goal is to get very high taxes put on soda, just like they did cigarettes. *sigh*
I can understand why its called 'pseudo-science' that the 'nannies' often use against overweight folks, as there are so many factors to take into consideration as to what causes weight and all. But the 'pseudo-science' as regards smoking and its effects isn't pseudo-science at all. Smoking does cause things like lung cancer and bronchial related diseases, and 2nd hand smoke does have a significant effect on the health on others. Now to what extent it is is debateable, but that smoke and cigarettes are detrimental to one's health has been proven time and again for well over 40 years now. And frankly, I'm all for a good number of the regulations that limit the public areas used for smoking.
Methinks that one good reason why some conservatives balk at this is because of the effects on the tobacco industry in conservative states like Jesse Helm's North Carolina, and the reduction in the industry's profits, thus the identification of the anti-smoking movement as a 'liberal' one. But, that's IMHO, ... your mileage may vary.
I recently have been on steroids and gained a pound a week, even though my diet has not changed. Sigh.
So very true how medication will effect your weight.
Most steroids are known to cause weight gain. If steroids are medically necessary, the weight is sometimes a side-effect. There's not much of a choice here. My friends who have taken steroids in the past all gained a lot with useage. But, they all lost the weight when they were weaned off of the steroids. I'm no doctor, but I would think that once steroids are stopped, weight returns to normal.
But what about anti-depressants. Some of my friends started taking them and gained a ton of weight. It's sad. Now they seemed to be more depressed about how over-weight they are than whatever it was they were depressed about it the first place.
Society places extreme pressure for women to live up to fashion model image. It's unrealistic.
Extreme measures are often pursued to keep middle-age weight at bay. Another friend I know nearly died from clotting during liposuction. She spent four months in the hospital afterwards from infection. Another person I know did die from a weight reduction suregery (clotting also). I'd say that some people take extreme measures to be thin from the pressure society puts on us.
Look at the ad now running for Dove soap... the women are a bit overweight, but the problem with the ads are that they still look great. These women are still young. None of the weight has turned to quarter-sized cottage cheese dimples on their thighs! (sorry if I'm being too graphic, but until they put a woman in an ad with "real" fat on her, I'm not buying, and, of course no one else will buy if they do!)
People who make comments about other people's weight are rude, even though they think they are well-meaning. It's hurtful and just shouldn't be done. Strangers and sometimes even family, don't know, nor do they need to know why one has put on weight.
We have to be happy no matter where we are with our weight. Sure, it feels great to lose a few pounds or more, does a lot for the ego and overall well being, but face it, a slowing metabolism, along with (you fill in the blank) factors, make losing weight difficult.
In Renisance (sp) Times, us over-weight women were the models. Plump was pleasing to the eye. How is it that society has changed that? How is it that society has turned us against ourselves by making us feel less for having more? The fact is, the average person gains 10 pounds for every 10 years that go by without changing diet. I'd say our bodies are designed this way. We have little control over the design.
Some of you know I've been dieting like crazy for a while. I've seen very little results. I'm past the point of discouragement and coming to a point of acceptance. It's not meant for me to starve. It's not meant for me to exhaust myself with exercise all day. I'm on my way to acceptance and thankfulness... thankfulness because out of all the problems I could have in life right now about my phsycial self, the only one is weight.
When I see myself in the light of other people's physical ailments, my weight is insignifcant.
Think I'll have a drink now....
To all the Ladies of GSC, here's to contentment in who you are today.
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As far as FAT goes...
Dated a guy from Iraq once... (kinda weird to think of now).. but they seemed to like their women bigger...also carried guns, and if you spent the night, the grandmother would sit by the head of your bed all night to make sure you were safe~
Also dated a guy from Greece once... they also seemed to like to feed their woman until they were good and fat.
And 'people' offering advise is rude. My Mother would be one of those 'trying to help'...
But, honestly, I don’t like being fat… and have packed on 20 since a back injury… working to get it off… just don’t feel as good~
We're fataphobic... and narrow minded... can't see past the physicals... it's not just fat either, it's also relating to ugly, plain, poor, unlearned, and in some cases Modern ;)
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Robes
The Latin men like a heavier woman, too. It's just American men who like the Twiggy skinny kind of gal.
Me, I like a man I can hold on to. I wouldn't want him blowing away in the wind!!
hugs,
Robi
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Belle
Dot, sometimes folks are just plain rude. My ex used to say all the time to me, "I'd rather be hungry than fat."
There was a time where people were constantly asking me when I was "due". It was terribly upsetting and I'd come home in tears with nothing that would make me feel better. I finally got peeved enough to decide to give these people a lesson in manners that they would NEVER forget. I planned in depth what I would do and shared it with my ex, who was usually left to pick up the pieces after these incidents.....despite his intense dislike of body fat (except, I was okay...
right....)
Anyway.....after planning my attack it took a while before I had the chance to put the plan in place....but it was at the pet store on a very busy week-end and we're in line to check out. The girl behind me asks when I'm due....I start crying and loud as I can muster....I just had a miscarriage...how DARE you ask some woman you don't know when her baby is due?????
She shrunk to 2mm and started stammering and apologizing. My ex put his arm around me and told her that no one should ask a woman when she's due unless she knows beyond the shadow of a doubt that the woman is actually pregnant. All this in front of a whole store full of customers.
I was really crying, though....I had been working very hard on my diet and was sick and tired of people asking me that question. Since getting out of TWI and getting divorced, though, I've lost 25 lbs....easiest thing I've done since getting rid of the stress, guilt and oppression....go figure!!
Maybe, when they say something to you, you should offer to buy them a copy of Amy Vanderbilt's book of manners. ;)
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bowtwi
Four days after bow jr was born, I was asked when the baby was due. I matter-of-factly told them he was born 4 days ago. They were embarassed. I was not.
A couple years ago a neighbor "lady" told my then 8-year-old friend that I was nasty because I was fat. My dear little friend was so upset she had to call me and tell me right away.
I told her not to let it bother her, that yes, I WAS fat, but I could diet and lose weight anytime I chose to, but the ugliness in that woman was TO THE BONE! (I then explained that by that I meant forever!)
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wwjesuslaughat
Belle,
EXCELLENT response! I bet that woman never asked any woman again when she is due.
I saw an acquaintance in the mall a few years ago who I knew was expecting and asked her when she was due. She pointed to the baby in the stroller beside her. "About two weeks ago," she replied. I don't ask anymore.
Fat seems to be the safe thing to make fun of anymore, now that Americans have gotten politically correct and have cut back on racial, ethnic, and sexual preference jokes. It usually doesn't bother me ( I am overweight) unless I think I have been discriminated against because of my weight. And anyone who's been overweight for a period time knows that happens too often.
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Sushi
I've been overweight for most of my life. Right now, I'm in a downward trend and intend to keep it that way. I am also diabetic.
I think the difference is, as opposed to hair color, the size of one's nose, et al, weight is regarded as something an individual can do something about. And while one can get cosmetic surgery for nature's oversights, weight is something you can control. It's a matter of how badly you want it.
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GarthP2000
Yeah well, snide remarks about one's weight is something that they can control too. Too bad they don't think about that.
<_<
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excathedra
good point garthie
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CoolWaters
Belle...you really are more genteel and southernly in your ways than I am!!! Of course...you're a Belle...and I'm just a dam*ed Yankee. Sigh.
My perfect comeback?
"Wow. I'm am so very flattered that you are so drawn to looking at my body. But, really honey, you ain't ever gonna *uck me, so step back and pop those nasty lusting eyes right back in your head."
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Sushi
I'd like to make it clear, I wasn't condoning the snide remarks, just examining the thought process.
1. One person sees another.
2. First person makes quick mental calculation of second person's general appearance.
3. Concludes they aren't as fat as second person.
4. Obviously, this means they are 'better' than second person.
5. In a misguided attempt to 'help' second person, says something they 'think' will help them.
It could also be, first person is rather insecure about their appearance. Therefore, first person is actually trying to make THEMSELVES feel better by making the snide remark.
Admittedly though, there does seem to be a 'rudening' of America. Usually, this is done under the guise of 'help', but is probably more an attempt for the commenter to feel better about themselves rather than genuinely encouraging the object of their comments.
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rascal
Belle, your spouse reminds me of mine....lol I remember him angrily growling at me onetime during our first year, that *you had DAMNED well not ever get fat* in a very ominous threatening sort of way.....
I took him so seriously and absolutely accepted that he was right to feel that way fully believing the consequences would be harsh and justified.....lol we were such idiots.
Problem was....whenever I got nice and skinny....I ended up preggers....go figure
I am short so of course every lb shows.....after 7 children I`ll never have that svelt little figure I had bk (before kids).
I do karate 5 hrs a week...more push ups and sit ups, jumping jacks, running you name it than anybody I know, dig fence posts, pour concrete, am carefull about what I eat, and am in the best physical shape with more capability than I have ever had in my life .....and yet I weigh nearly double my little twiggy 80s self.
It is hard to reconcile my minds picture of myself and the gal I see looking back at me from the mirror.
Solved that one though..... I don`t have any mirrors that show below the shoulders hee hee.
My Mom is the worst.... I will work hard all day with little or nothing to eat and will sit down with a plate of sketti, only to have to listen to her go on about how I will never lose any weight if I keep eating pasta....or put cheese on it.....lord help me if I have a piece of bread.....(this from the woman who eats an entire giant bag of candy bars at one sitting....lol)
Or I shouldn`t have that second slice of pizza....blah blah.
I remember one summer, I worked hard, I walked 5 miles or more every morning and rowed around the lake every afternoon, I had no sweets or sugar and lost a pound a day for the entire summer....I wanted to suprise mark when I got home.....
I was preggers within 3 weeks.....I have never tried since....who the hell has 24 hours a day to devote to exercise anyway?
It costs extra money to buy the diet foods, I am talking veggies and salads....it costs money to buy the cloths and shoes that make you look good, it costs money for the nice hair and make up....money that spouse doesn`t want to part with....and he has a problem with the way I have let myself go??? He damned well better not say so to me grrrrr
I have come to the place that it just plain doesn`t matter anymore what other people see.....because I am learning to like what is inside myself for the first time ever....
To my spouses horror...last month a had my hair shaved ...left a little on the top because I was wearing karate helmets, riding helmets, working in the viscious heat...and was becoming physically ill.........It was so funny, when Mark expressed his disgust.......I was suprise to find that it just didn`t matter...my mother moaned about how I looked so *dyke* ...I thought screw her, put on my favorite pair of ear rings slicked what was left of my hair back with gell and headed out the door head held high feeling like a million bucks :)
Guys I am sorry for the cruel things people say.....some of you are so much more clever than me.
Bow I`d like to thrash that neighbor for not seeing how beatifull you really are.
Maybe offer her a gift certificate to the local optomotrist to get her eyes checked and some badly needed glasses??
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Dot Matrix
My friend Janice wrote a poem about being fat.
She went from about a size 6 to maybe a 10 or 12 at the age of 50. Her husband then used to make fun of her all the time and eventually divorced her.
She was SO upset and ya know what her mother did? She said it is your own fault as you became fat.
Oh my God, 3 children, a house, two very top-notch people and FAT is going to do them in?
HE is a General in the armed forces and she is a lawyer. They have two kids in med school and one in law school. Janice is "girl scout" pure, generous and kind. Amd this butt hole is upset that at the age of 50/55 she is in a 9-10 sometimes 11-12 pair of pants.
So, how come its okay for his nose hair to be long enough for braids and because she is no longer 22 he finds that as fault?
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Dot Matrix
PS
You can correct stinky feet, bad breath, poor choices in clothes but perfect strangers do not mention things like that as they know it is rude.
So, why do people think it is okay to speak to a stranger about their weight? I heard people say to a stranger in a restroom, "My daughter had a weight problem until she went to Weight Watchers."
IT is like with all the sins in the world, the worst is gaining weight in the good old USA. A thin slut would be better than a slightly chubby wonderful woman.
Another one of my friends was married to a lawyer. She help him start the firm I eventually worked at. One day, he brings home a business associate with an insurance firm. This woman was a thin, very unattractive phone solicitor. And the man? He left his angel of a wife after 35 years for the skinny ugly, been with the football team woman. When his intelligent wife and their two sons (who became ministers -- good ones) were thrown away like garbage.
The big sore spot in the marriage? She gained 20 pounds over the course of 35 years. How dare she?
BTW, Janice the lawyer works at a place where a lot of the woman are younger and thinner than she. One day, there was a lunch for the whole group and she happened to get on the elevator with a judge and they entered the lunch area together. HE looked all around the room then at her.
And he said, "Ya know in this whole room you are the fattest person here."
I think he knew better. IT seems to be accepted to be mean to anyone who gains weight.
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allan w.
Well...the latest (comprehensive) report out is that overweightness and obesity is due not to a lack of exercize but due more to the fact of over-eating !
To me it makes sense doesn't it ? You don't see many people on hunger strikes dying of high colestrol.
Ooppss..DUCK !
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Dot Matrix
Bless you Allan, may you never gain 20 pounds as you get old just because you are getting older. May you never be judged on your hairline or your waistline. And yeah, you may want to duck there ol' chap.
Maybe not, all the FAT People like food too much to throw it at you. Anyone have a brick?
Another story:
Oh here is one, a short chubby woman was walking down and aisle at the pharmacy. Minding her own business. She was dressed well, and looked as if she just came from work. Perhaps a hard day as well -- you all work. Work is not always easy.
Anyway, she was the only one in the aisle and the teen working announced over the speaker "Susquash now in aisle three. Susquash now walking in aisle three."
Of course people went to LOOK in aisle three and there was this perfectly dressed woman in her PLUS size clothes just standing there like a deer in the headlights.
(Susquash is Big Foot)
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dmiller
So --- Rascal ---- If'n you were to keep this up ---
We'd be rid of you in less than a year, right??
(Sowwy!! -- It was TOO good to pass up!) ;)
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Linda Z
Allan said:
First, could you post a link to that "latest" and "comprehensive" report?
Second, you're showing your ignorance here. One of my best friends doesn't even weigh 100 lbs soaking wet, and she has high cholesterol. Genes play a big role in both obesity and hypercholestrolemia.
I've struggled with my weight my whole life. I come from a long line of overweight people and have pictures as far back as my ggg-grandparents as proof.
Do I overeat sometimes? Of course I do, but certainly not always. So do some of my thin friends. If I ate like they do, I'd weigh 800 lbs!
I read a study once (can't post a link--it was years ago and wasn't online) in which thin people and fat people were kept on the exact same diet, the exact same exercise regimen, under controlled conditions (i.e., they all stayed in the same place and were closely monitored so there was no chance of cheating). The thin ones stayed thin and the fat ones got fatter. Genetics.
That doesn't mean we should just give up, eat everything in sight and say, "Oh well, it's in my genes." But it goes a long way toward explaining why losing weight and keeping it off is so difficult for so many of us.
(I think if I had a dollar for every pound I've ever lost, I could be retired and sitting on a beach somewhere sipping iced tea and reading a book.)
And sushi, in one of my many forays into the world of Weight Watchers, it was a standing joke how we women hated how much easier it was for the men to lose weight. Because of their higher ratio of muscle to fat and, typically, their higher rate of metabolism, they ran circles around us in terms of pounds lost each week. Women would say, "I lost 3 lbs this week," and we'd all applaud. Men would say, "I lost 10 lbs this week," and we'd applaud for them too, but the applause was usually accompanied by an audible groan. :)
I wish you well in your efforts, though, sushi. Diabetes is nothing to mess with, and I'm glad you're working at being healthier.
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CoolWaters
No...but you do see anorexics dying from a whole bunch of destructive problems caused by not eating.
Please tell me you're anorexic.
Ooops!!! Ducking!!!!
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Bramble
In TWI 2 being fat was due to unfaithfulness or slothfulness or hardhearted ness or, devil spirits or....all bad.
I recently have been on steroids and gained a pound a week, even though my diet has not changed. Sigh.
Hey--my cholesterol is great, though!
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BikerBabe
Anorexic? Is that my cue to check in CW?
I swear sometimes, if one more person asks me if I'm anorexic I'm gonna SCREAM! Yes, I'm 5 feet even and 84 pounds. I figure that's better than some years ago when I dropped down to 72 pounds .. which they don't seem to 'hear' of course. They tell me to eat more or give me suggestions on foods to eat. This is even after I tell them I have Crohn's Disease and my guts are so full of scar tissue that I don't absorb any nutrition from the food I eat, no matter what it is. It doesn't matter what I eat, if I'm flaring, which I almost always am since I can't afford the meds I should take to get into remission .. I'm not gonna gain weight.
So don't sweat it ladies. We skinny people get the same crap from the nannies of the world. They are going more and more after what people eat, now that they have pretty much destroyed the world of smokers by making them 3rd class citizens and made the legal habit something illegal to do in most public places. I post on a few smokers rights forums and we are seeing the nannies/antis all now going after people who are overweight and using the same psudo-science strategy they did to make smokers hated. They have no morals. They use false medical reports, false tests, just whatever it takes to 'prove' their point. Their latest goal is to get very high taxes put on soda, just like they did cigarettes. *sigh*
There is no reasoning with this type of person. They know what is best for your life and are very outspoken about it. I wish they would all crawl back into the hole they came out of and leave everyone alone to live their lives the way they want. When we want their opinion, we know how to ask for it.
Tofu anyone? *shudder*
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Dot Matrix
I am sure some thin ones get it, but from my view a lot of too thin people are told they look great, or "I wish I were skinny." "Oh you should eat!" but in a more loving manner, almost like a compliment.
"Honey, you will waste away, eat something." "Look at that cute little waist."
All the while most women wished they looked like you.
Nobody that I have ever met, looks at a fatty and says boy, I wish I looked like you -- except for an even fatter person.
FAT people are at the mercy of a society where looks are everything.
FAT = Lazy or they "just do not care" etc.
IF you say "My friend has a great personality." Most side comments are, "then she must be fat."
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rascal
I dunno Allan, but I can about garantee that with four karate classes of a couple hours each a week with all of the physical labor of mixing comcrete and digging that I do at work, not to mention the physically exhausting demands of working with livestock...fencing, mucking.....Have you ever hauled and hay out of the field and stacked it?
I can just about bet that I am the most physically active person here....and yet with all of that and a reasonable diet, I am 75 lbs heavier than when I got married.
I eat way less than when I was 105 and yet exercise to the point of physical exhaustian on a daily basis....and it makes no difference.
That is what age/genetics and a slowing metabolism will do for you :(
Dot, I am really suprised at how superficial people are...your friends stories are really sad.
In MY opinion, a guy that would dump his wife over a few lbs sure wasn`t much of a husband anyway.
What asses.
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GarthP2000
I can understand why its called 'pseudo-science' that the 'nannies' often use against overweight folks, as there are so many factors to take into consideration as to what causes weight and all. But the 'pseudo-science' as regards smoking and its effects isn't pseudo-science at all. Smoking does cause things like lung cancer and bronchial related diseases, and 2nd hand smoke does have a significant effect on the health on others. Now to what extent it is is debateable, but that smoke and cigarettes are detrimental to one's health has been proven time and again for well over 40 years now. And frankly, I'm all for a good number of the regulations that limit the public areas used for smoking.
Methinks that one good reason why some conservatives balk at this is because of the effects on the tobacco industry in conservative states like Jesse Helm's North Carolina, and the reduction in the industry's profits, thus the identification of the anti-smoking movement as a 'liberal' one. But, that's IMHO, ... your mileage may vary.
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Amazingrace
So very true how medication will effect your weight.
Most steroids are known to cause weight gain. If steroids are medically necessary, the weight is sometimes a side-effect. There's not much of a choice here. My friends who have taken steroids in the past all gained a lot with useage. But, they all lost the weight when they were weaned off of the steroids. I'm no doctor, but I would think that once steroids are stopped, weight returns to normal.
But what about anti-depressants. Some of my friends started taking them and gained a ton of weight. It's sad. Now they seemed to be more depressed about how over-weight they are than whatever it was they were depressed about it the first place.
Society places extreme pressure for women to live up to fashion model image. It's unrealistic.
Extreme measures are often pursued to keep middle-age weight at bay. Another friend I know nearly died from clotting during liposuction. She spent four months in the hospital afterwards from infection. Another person I know did die from a weight reduction suregery (clotting also). I'd say that some people take extreme measures to be thin from the pressure society puts on us.
Look at the ad now running for Dove soap... the women are a bit overweight, but the problem with the ads are that they still look great. These women are still young. None of the weight has turned to quarter-sized cottage cheese dimples on their thighs! (sorry if I'm being too graphic, but until they put a woman in an ad with "real" fat on her, I'm not buying, and, of course no one else will buy if they do!)
People who make comments about other people's weight are rude, even though they think they are well-meaning. It's hurtful and just shouldn't be done. Strangers and sometimes even family, don't know, nor do they need to know why one has put on weight.
We have to be happy no matter where we are with our weight. Sure, it feels great to lose a few pounds or more, does a lot for the ego and overall well being, but face it, a slowing metabolism, along with (you fill in the blank) factors, make losing weight difficult.
In Renisance (sp) Times, us over-weight women were the models. Plump was pleasing to the eye. How is it that society has changed that? How is it that society has turned us against ourselves by making us feel less for having more? The fact is, the average person gains 10 pounds for every 10 years that go by without changing diet. I'd say our bodies are designed this way. We have little control over the design.
Some of you know I've been dieting like crazy for a while. I've seen very little results. I'm past the point of discouragement and coming to a point of acceptance. It's not meant for me to starve. It's not meant for me to exhaust myself with exercise all day. I'm on my way to acceptance and thankfulness... thankfulness because out of all the problems I could have in life right now about my phsycial self, the only one is weight.
When I see myself in the light of other people's physical ailments, my weight is insignifcant.
Think I'll have a drink now....
To all the Ladies of GSC, here's to contentment in who you are today.
posted by Grace
who doesn't much care if her bacon is a shakin'
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