"The Wonder of Worship"

[I Love Bagpipes]

It's hard for me to figure the forum for this. For now, when I am not sure what forum to use to start a thread, I default to "About the Way." I'm sure this is due to the continued decompression process. Decompress means "to decrease the pressure on, esp. gradually; to return (a diver, etc.) to a condition of normal atmospheric pressure." What an apt word (decompress) someone used in a thread to describe the exit process from TWI.

Anyway....this is a long post.

Below is an excerpt from a book I have been reading. This excerpt has ministered to me over an over the past 8 days. I've read and reread it. Self hatred and shame ran deep in me for DECADES. What freedom to learn to love myself..in God's tremendous and undying love and mercy. The friends (new and renewed) here at GSC and elsewhere since leaving TWI, have ministered to my soul...to the very depths. The exposing of who I am has been healing and cleansing...and I know there is more to come. Thank you. Because I love you, I desire to share this with you.

BTW, Ex10 recommended this book to me. :wub: Thank you dear Ex...

From the book The Cry of the Soul: How Our Emotions Reveal Our Deepest Questions About God,

by Dr. Dan B. Alexander & Dr. Tremper Longman III.

Chapter 15: "The Redemptive Power of Shame" .....Subtitle: "Freedom in Gratitude: The Wonder of Worship":

"'Remember, O Lord, your great mercy and love,

for they are from of old.

Remember not the sins of my youth

and my rebellious ways;

according to your love remember me,

for you are good, O Lord. '(Psalm 25:6 -7 )

As sorrow opens our hearts to redemptive desire, it halts our long fall into destructive self-absorption. Hope in our Advocate opens hearts to confidence, and confidence stops the fearful flight of shame. Gratitude softens the self-hatred of shame.

The violence of shame prefers to annihilate the self rather than allow it to live in hellish loneliness. It is a soul suicide that defends the last thread of dignity behind a roar of rage.

Hatred is like a huge, muscle-bound bully that refuses to allow anyone to get near the stricken, bloodied soul. The bully is cruel, offensive, and antagonistic. He compels others to flee or fight. Either response works to justify more hatred. It is a vicious defense that refuses to cry out for an advocate who will redeem.

The only path through this ferocious defense is a goodness that neither attacks the bully nor fears him. Instead, it offers the bully what he really desires: forgiveness and reconciliation. This is how gratitude softens the self-hatred of shame.

Nearly three decades ago, Tremper offered a bully a taste of redemption. Tremper and I first met in a music class in eighth grade. I was a bully. A number of years of sexual abuse at the hands of a Scout master and by camp counselors at a boys' camp had strengthened a deep vein of rage and hatred in me.

During the music class, Tremper tapped me on the shoulder to ask if he could borrow a comb. I was a mean kid. I grabbed him by the shirt and hauled him out of his desk.

Tremper's response was to laugh. Never in my young life had I experienced something so disconcerting. I was a large, aggressive football player with a bad reputation who used intimidation to hide a deep hatred for myself and an utter terror about relating to others. But Tremper laughed--a guileless, kind, contempt-free laugh. It melted me instantaneously. As far as I was concerned, from that point on we were best friends. Our friendship became the means by which God cornered me long enough for me to hear and respond to the gospel.

Gratitude arises in a heart that is stunned by the lover's pursuit in spite of countless reasons to attack or withdraw in disgust. As Paul said, it is the kindness of God that leads to repentance (Romans 2:4). Gratitude arises the instant that grace is received; it is a praise of thanksgiving that is full of wonder and irony. How could someone choose me when my heart is so ugly and hard? It makes no sense. It violates my expectations, yet it arouses the deepest chords of desire.

Shame has no power in a heart that is full of thanksgiving. Hatred stands no chance in a heart that sings with innocent desire, humble sorrow, solid hope, and grateful praise to God's goodness.

David, the writer of so many psalms, gives us a wild picture of worship that is free from shame. As David returned the Ark of the Covenant -- a symbol of the presence of God -- to its proper place among the people of God, he danced, praised, and worshiped God with a heart that was flooded with joy in being chosen to be in the presence of God:

'David wearing a linen ephod, danced before the Lord with all his might, while he and the entire house of Israel brought up the ark of the Lord with shouts and the sound of trumpets.

As the ark of the Lord was entering the City of David, Michal daughter of Saul watched from a window. And when she saw king David leaping and dancing befere the Lord, she despised him in her heart...

When David returned home to bless his household, Michal daughter of Saul came out to meet him and said, "How the king of Israel has distinguished himself today, disrobing in the sight of the slave girls of his servants as any bulgar fellow would!"

David said to Michal, "It was before the Lord, who chose me rather than your father or anyone from his house when he appointed me ruler over the Lord's people Israel--I will celebrate before the Lord. I will become even more undiginified than this, and I will be humiliated in my own eyes. But by these slave girls you spoke of, I will be held in honor. "' (2 Samuel 6:14-16, 20-22)

Michal tried to shame David by pointing out that even the poorest and least of all the people--slave girls--saw his nakedness and passionate worship. He responded by recalling the honor of being chosen by God to rule, to celebrate. He faced the likelihood of even bearing greater shame, but the spectre of shame was not a terror in a heart that rejoiced in worship.

Grateful worship begins with our acknowledgment of God's untold goodness in pouring out His mercy and remembering us in His kindness, not in our sin. A grateful heart has no need to engage in self-destruction through violent self-hatred. Self-hatred tries to annihilate what it assumes is the cause of shame -- the self. Worship acknowledges that the cause of shame--idolatry--has been forgiven. Why would we turn on ourselves (or others) in vicious hatred when God's goodness reigns over us like a glorious rainbow?

As worship confirms for us that we are forgiven, we are freed from the fear of exposure. Worship, therefore, leads to freedom. It also leads to service, as we become free to join God in putting evil to shame."

End of excerpt

[Patriot]

Hey ILB!

Wow, that's a pretty neat (and deep) elaboration! I'm actually writing out on index cards the characteristic (e.g. hatred), its basis and manifestation.

The one on hatred, to me, was pretty revealing. Neat (but sad) example of the person who was a bully, but because he was so hurt prior. I think you probably can see much of that hurt and therefore hatred here on GSC. The "bully" was antagonistic, and expecting a flight or fight reaction, and how it broke the normal chain when someone just laughed at hatred manifested. Neat and thoughtful stuff! Then again, I would expect nothing less from you :) .

Love you!

[Radar OReilly]

Methinks this is Mrs Patriot.... :)

Either way...........Happy Easter to the entire Patriot family...........you are amongst the most dearest to my heart.

Consider yourself hugged, kissed and prayed for.

ror

[ex10]

Hey pipes!

I am so glad this book has made an impact. I remember when I read it for the first time, it was about 10 years ago, and I really wanted to understand shame and suffering and the place it has in our lives. As I read through this book the scales fell off my eyes. I hope and pray the same is happening for you, my dearest friend.

[I Love Bagpipes]

Thanks Partiot and Ex10.

Thanks for your prayers and practical help for our whole family. (Tears of joy.)

Want the meeting in the sky be grand!?!