Goodness....the outpouring of empathy is so different from the responses I would get if still in TWI. Thank you for listening.
Skyrider....I did go dancing!! This past Saturday. Danced my back right out of whack, but had a blast doin' it!
Thanks JL. I do have a few close contacts who I have spent time with via phone. Talking & posting are different therapies for me. By publically posting I feel I'm opening up more....something I didn't feel comfortable with in TWI. And I'm not comfortable with it now....but I feel that is one reason I need to do it.
Diazbro you really got me thinking. Interestingly I have explored interests outside TWI especially the past 5 years. Yet I haven't felt like I fully involve myself so to speak. I always had to keep myself "in check" just in case I might do something "off the Word". One example is that stuff about opening your heart to "unbelievers" (ie: anyone outside the household). It wasn't until I fully opened my heart to an "unbeliever" that my physical healing kicked into wellness. That was about 6 years ago. I wondered then that if it was so "off the Word" for me to open up, why was I starting to get results? So glad I didn't take that advice (to not open up). But still I kept that "in check" (and still have it) attitude in other stuff I would attend.
(Woops my Window 95 just ran out of room. Need to continue on another post)
Oh geez...my puter, this old windows 95 is bucking me....I'm gonna switch to the XP as long as my daughter doesn't need it for her paper.
TS is X-Files and Star Trek okay? "The Truth is Out There" Yeah that whole mindset of everything having to have a profit (according to TWI standards) has been rough on me over the years. My kids have helped me to keep some of that religion at bay. But still it is in me, in no small way.
Rascal wrote: "You have been in a major battle for your life. You have spent years in survival mode, years thinking, planning, finally the drama of escape....the fears accompanied with leaving, the battle to understand what went wrong...." That REALLY struck home and helped me. 24 of the 28 years in TWI I battled ill health. A little over a year ago, that BATTLE ended. (The beginning to that end started 6 years ago.) A big struggle in my life was over and for a while I felt lost. It was at that time that the big hole in my heart surfaced. I thought maybe the hole was because my biggest goal (wellness) had, for the most part, been fulfilled. As time went on, the hole grew. Then I realized the hole was my relationship with God; I was living a lie. So now this next HUGE goal of leaving TWI and building MY relationship with my personal God and LJC is emerging. In the last 1-1/2 years myl ife has dramatically changed. (And my kids are growing older..you know, different relationship than when you laid in bed with 'em reading "Are You My Mother?" ...SNORT!!!) Thanks so much for reminding me of this.
Groucho...love the sore thumb analogy. In my profession I work with preschoolers...sort of reminded my of something they'd say. (That is not a blow to your intelligence! :) I believe preschoolers are very intelligent and I learn from them regularaly.) Simplicity...uncomplicated....gentle.
Doglover...ohhh..dear Doglover. Thank you for loving this old dog. I know I can call you. And thanks for all those hours this past weekend. I didn't want them to end. Sorry you were so tired. But I know it was a good tired...and we laughed a lot. And yeah, it helps. Funny, I turned to The Amplified this past summer. Just couldn't take some of KJV...cetain patterns and emotions it would bring up...didn't even want to read it. Of all things I read Isiah right before my official leave...confirmed lots of the stuff I was on the verge of doing.
And to anyone else I didn't respond to with thanks, thank you. And thanks for taking the freaking time to read all this jibberish I'm spitting out.
Never would have thunk that I'd be posting my inner thoughts and churnings on a public site!!
...just keep chug-chug-chugging along... the 'moments' may still be there in the future but they'll become less of an issue... sort of an "aye chihuahua" kind of thing...
I think God takes all of us on HIS deprogramming journey after we get out. I personally don't think all my time, effort, emotions, energy and studies were in vain. I think God taught me what He wanted me to walk away with.
But for a period of time I thought I "knew" more than most other people, not in an egotistical way, but because that's pretty much what we were led to believe. Once out it didn't take God long to teach me that there were LOTS of people that He teaches His truth to. TWI didn't have any exclusive rights to the truth.
Subjects important to the Way became not important to me. Example would be the trinity, the stand on homosexuality, 3 days/3 nights, who was crucified with Jesus etc.
I don't find those issues worth debating or talking about anymore - or pointing out to people that they are wrong when they say the opposite of what we learned in the way.
I also learned when I go into His arena and try to do His job I am sure to fail so I learned not to go there anymore.
I am much more fixated on scripture where it says, "People will know you are my disciples by how you love one another", OR, "growing up into Him in all things in love".
It did take me a while to not feel like I blew my leadership responsibilites though. But God got me past that too. I learned to live up to HIS expectations not VPW or LCMs. And believe me God took me in a whole totally different direction than where they wanted me to go.
"But I'm really good this month at neglecting responsibilities."
Don't be hard on yourself. Sometimes we need a month--or maybe two or three--to do something different from our regular responsibilities. If you're feeling guilty, maybe that's because you were used to having your life micromanaged and scrutinzied, and you have in the back of your mind that you're supposed to be following a bunch of schedules and trying to live up to standards someone else said you should live by.
Heck, just love yourself. Don't try to rush the process. Be patient with yourself. Don't try to live up to any more "rules" right now beyond loving God and loving your neighbor as yourself. As you examine the rules you're trying to follow, you might just find some of them are leftovers from your twi days that don't really matter.
And now I'm sort of stuck. This recent "chunk" has been hanging around too long. I think I'm angry and a little confused. I'm not motivated to do much of anything. I have suffered from the depths of depression before; but this isn't that. However it probably is mild depression.
Remember, too, that Jan/Feb are the depression months for lots of people because they are the darkest months of the year ( someone help me here, please, lack of seratonin or something like that). Once the sunlight shines more each day and the days become longer, this too will disappear. I'm that way, too (except for a couple of years when I took a liquid herb combination to balance my hormones).
So, basically, what I'm saying is that it's normal for a certain portion of the population to feel a little depressed during these months and get into a funk. It will soon be over. Once I realized what was causing it and why winter was a challenge for me, it was easier to overcome it.
Bagpipes, Your last post thanking us all for putting up with your "jibberish". Not jibberish to us since many of us have gone through some if not all of the same things.
Pipes, Life is GOOD! I have spent WAY too many years doing other peoples will....not to thoroughly enjoy every single moment of my remaining life doing what pleases me personally.
It is a good thing my spouse understands this....because we (daughter and I) brought two more horses home this week that needed a home...for a total of 9.
We have 7 dogs 5 of them HUGE....4 cats....too many turtles and hamsters and iguannas and geckos to mention....not to mention a tortoise who will reach 145 lbs in weight in the next 8 yrs....
What profit are they? None what so EVER....matter of fact they cost an enormous amount to care for...but the kids and I enjoy them...so we continue to rescue every stray we lay hands on.
Does my house work get done? Oh HAYAL no....but this week we DID play in the creek, hunt fossels, ride horses and go to our karate classes.
Is THAT decent and in order? Oh HAYAL no....but we sure are a heck of lot happier than when everything WAS!!!
What I am saying is that I think that what we do in this life is simply our business to either be happy doing what we please or making ourselves miserable suiting somebody ELSES idea of what they think we OUGHT to be doing....this includes our personal responsibilities.
Thanks for sharing, Bagpipes - the stuff in this and many other threads is WHY I come to Grease Spot! Morgan, Wayfer Not and Belle mentioned counseling – and I personally will vouch for professional counseling helping to sort things out. I grew up in an extremely dysfunctional family, and on top of that, depression runs in my family. I say this to let you know TWI didn't screw me up in the first place – but it sure helped to make matters worse.
ChasUFarley and Rascal shared some helpful thoughts: Share, connect, allow yourself to be human, God equipped you with emotions, we all go through different stages in our recovery and experience different emotions…After leaving TWI I tried to handle all my mental baggage from only an intellectual level – and by myself. I was pretty good at suppressing my feelings and would lose myself in my job with as much devotion as I gave TWI. Fortunately, my wife loved me enough to threaten to leave me if we didn't see a marriage counselor [which we did] and see a psychiatrist for depression [which I did].
The other word I capitalized above was "PROCESS" – I call it that because there's some work you have to do. Yeah, you're gonna pray and ask God for help [that's part of the process] – but maybe it's like how we learn to walk. Our parents may have held us up at first – but we eventually got the idea and feel of using our own muscles and coordination. Part of the process for me is coming to Grease Spot. Sometimes I just read, sometimes I share. Sometimes my wife and I will talk about something we read on Grease Spot. My point in this is that a process is going on – whether you share on Grease Spot or to a spouse or friend – you're having to articulate the stuff that's churning inside. And you may get feedback and a different perspective from your audience.
(Oh geez...I just wrote a reply and went to post it and it went out in cyberspace somewhere. :blink: So I'm gonna' try another time. It's just harder after that initial inspiration...ya' know?)
Thanks again!!!! You guys have been grand and I have read and reread these posts. I have considered and acted upon some of them. Chunks of perspective (yours) have helped me see that these chunks are not so much an intrusion as necessary realizations, stuff that needs to be jostled around, dug up, looked at, and honored. It's comforting that I don't have to understand it all (the chunks) or be able to explain it. You guys KNOW it because you have lived it. The connections have been awesome..the emails, phone calls, PMs, posts, and chats.
I've allowed myself to be engrossed with GSC these past weeks and (for me) I have posted a lot(your suggestion ). I have revisted 2 of my docs (your prompting ). I have bared my soul and you have honored and respected that and have been kind with my heart. I know you know the vulnerabilty one feels when one decides to share on these forums. It is a HUGE step for me to be so public with my inner workings and vulnerabilities. Thank you for honoring that and for your kindness and respect.
I know this healing happens in cycles, layers, etc. As part of this process I've decided to take a GSC fast. (But I probably won't fast from chat. :) ) I don't know for how long. I'm gonna' take some time and try to wrap my mind around some other stuff and see what emerges (your suggestions )
I applaud you! And may I add, "Yea God!!!"
So thanks many times over. And let me know where I need to send the payment for the services!! ^_^
Hi Bagpipes! I write this as I listen to Celtic music. Bagpipes, indeed.
Someone has already suggested getting a different Bible. This was a big step for me. I didn't want to throw out the Word, but I couldn't read it without re-living so much pain. Same thing with prayer.
Here's what I learned. "The Message" Bible is still the Word, but it doesn't bring on the flashbacks. You'll love it.
And when you pray, don't pray Way-style (Thank you Father for ............ fill in the blank ........... whatever it is you're praying for). How arrogant ! How manipulative ! How dare anyone thank God for something before they have it - as if they know what God will do next. Do you remember how to work the Word? Well, work it ... study the Lord's prayer, the way Jesus taught folks to pray. It's so different than what we learned.
Don't punctuate you prayer with "Thank you Father", but rather "Thy will be done". It's so much more respectful. And besides, eventually you'll start believing it: THY WILL BE DONE !!!!! So nice to put it all in His hands, instead of thinking that your own behavior is what determines your blessings or lack of blessings.
Regarding counselors - I've seen plenty. But Greasespot is the best, because you don't have to spend 45 minutes of your one-hour session, explaining the rituals and abuses of TWI. People here already know that stuff, so you can just go right ahead and unload without the pre-explanations. Counselors don't understand what we've been through.
However, one counselor gave me some advice that has definitely helped. She said I should remember, remember way back to before I ever heard of TWI. And then remember something that made me happy. And DO THAT THING. Do what made you happy before TWI. For me it was painting. And now, many paintings later, seven years later to be exact, I am approaching happiness.
It's been a long strange trip. But I'm getting there. Lots of us are. It's your turn now. Xena
Regarding counselors - I've seen plenty. But Greasespot is the best, because you don't have to spend 45 minutes of your one-hour session, explaining the rituals and abuses of TWI. People here already know that stuff, so you can just go right ahead and unload without the pre-explanations. Counselors don't understand what we've been through.
{Warning this is a very messy exercise but it works}
Find a large area with a wall --the basement if it has a drain on the floor is good. the side of the house is good--the kitchen if you must
Move any thing you don't want to have to clean (furniture) out of the area.
cover the floor space with newspaper spread it out over the area --out side have the hose ready
Depending on how angry you are--hard boil about 1 1/2-3 dozen eggs I mean really hard boil them say 15 minutes on a good rolling boil
cool the eggs
on each egg write the name of the person/ situation you are angry at
now stand back about 10-20 feet
picture that person as the egg--that person is the egg
hurl said egg at the wall as hard as you can
watch the person/egg explode into little itty bitty pieces
repeat until 1) your arm is tired 2) the mess is more than you can stand 3) you feel satisfied
repeat as needed.
Clean
in addition to the emotional satisfaction of "exploding" the source of you anger you get a good workout for the cardio system-- the exploded egg bits make a great food source for the birds and squirrels
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I Love Bagpipes
Goodness....the outpouring of empathy is so different from the responses I would get if still in TWI. Thank you for listening.
Skyrider....I did go dancing!! This past Saturday. Danced my back right out of whack, but had a blast doin' it!
Thanks JL. I do have a few close contacts who I have spent time with via phone. Talking & posting are different therapies for me. By publically posting I feel I'm opening up more....something I didn't feel comfortable with in TWI. And I'm not comfortable with it now....but I feel that is one reason I need to do it.
Diazbro you really got me thinking. Interestingly I have explored interests outside TWI especially the past 5 years. Yet I haven't felt like I fully involve myself so to speak. I always had to keep myself "in check" just in case I might do something "off the Word". One example is that stuff about opening your heart to "unbelievers" (ie: anyone outside the household). It wasn't until I fully opened my heart to an "unbeliever" that my physical healing kicked into wellness. That was about 6 years ago. I wondered then that if it was so "off the Word" for me to open up, why was I starting to get results? So glad I didn't take that advice (to not open up). But still I kept that "in check" (and still have it) attitude in other stuff I would attend.
(Woops my Window 95 just ran out of room. Need to continue on another post)
Oh geez...my puter, this old windows 95 is bucking me....I'm gonna switch to the XP as long as my daughter doesn't need it for her paper.
:)
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dmiller
Get a Mac!!!
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I Love Bagpipes
TS is X-Files and Star Trek okay?
"The Truth is Out There" Yeah that whole mindset of everything having to have a profit (according to TWI standards) has been rough on me over the years. My kids have helped me to keep some of that religion at bay. But still it is in me, in no small way.
Rascal wrote: "You have been in a major battle for your life. You have spent years in survival mode, years thinking, planning, finally the drama of escape....the fears accompanied with leaving, the battle to understand what went wrong...." That REALLY struck home and helped me. 24 of the 28 years in TWI I battled ill health. A little over a year ago, that BATTLE ended. (The beginning to that end started 6 years ago.) A big struggle in my life was over and for a while I felt lost. It was at that time that the big hole in my heart surfaced. I thought maybe the hole was because my biggest goal (wellness) had, for the most part, been fulfilled. As time went on, the hole grew. Then I realized the hole was my relationship with God; I was living a lie. So now this next HUGE goal of leaving TWI and building MY relationship with my personal God and LJC is emerging. In the last 1-1/2 years myl ife has dramatically changed. (And my kids are growing older..you know, different relationship than when you laid in bed with 'em reading "Are You My Mother?" ...SNORT!!!) Thanks so much for reminding me of this.
Groucho...love the sore thumb analogy. In my profession I work with preschoolers...sort of reminded my of something they'd say. (That is not a blow to your intelligence! :) I believe preschoolers are very intelligent and I learn from them regularaly.) Simplicity...uncomplicated....gentle.
Doglover...ohhh..dear Doglover. Thank you for loving this old dog. I know I can call you. And thanks for all those hours this past weekend. I didn't want them to end. Sorry you were so tired. But I know it was a good tired...and we laughed a lot. And yeah, it helps. Funny, I turned to The Amplified this past summer. Just couldn't take some of KJV...cetain patterns and emotions it would bring up...didn't even want to read it. Of all things I read Isiah right before my official leave...confirmed lots of the stuff I was on the verge of doing.
And to anyone else I didn't respond to with thanks, thank you. And thanks for taking the freaking time to read all this jibberish I'm spitting out.
Never would have thunk that I'd be posting my inner thoughts and churnings on a public site!!
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
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Tom Strange
...just keep chug-chug-chugging along... the 'moments' may still be there in the future but they'll become less of an issue... sort of an "aye chihuahua" kind of thing...
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Edi
I think God takes all of us on HIS deprogramming journey after we get out. I personally don't think all my time, effort, emotions, energy and studies were in vain. I think God taught me what He wanted me to walk away with.
But for a period of time I thought I "knew" more than most other people, not in an egotistical way, but because that's pretty much what we were led to believe. Once out it didn't take God long to teach me that there were LOTS of people that He teaches His truth to. TWI didn't have any exclusive rights to the truth.
Subjects important to the Way became not important to me. Example would be the trinity, the stand on homosexuality, 3 days/3 nights, who was crucified with Jesus etc.
I don't find those issues worth debating or talking about anymore - or pointing out to people that they are wrong when they say the opposite of what we learned in the way.
I also learned when I go into His arena and try to do His job I am sure to fail so I learned not to go there anymore.
I am much more fixated on scripture where it says, "People will know you are my disciples by how you love one another", OR, "growing up into Him in all things in love".
It did take me a while to not feel like I blew my leadership responsibilites though. But God got me past that too. I learned to live up to HIS expectations not VPW or LCMs. And believe me God took me in a whole totally different direction than where they wanted me to go.
So, one for God and zippo for them. PTL
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Linda Z
Bagpipes said:
"But I'm really good this month at neglecting responsibilities."
Don't be hard on yourself. Sometimes we need a month--or maybe two or three--to do something different from our regular responsibilities. If you're feeling guilty, maybe that's because you were used to having your life micromanaged and scrutinzied, and you have in the back of your mind that you're supposed to be following a bunch of schedules and trying to live up to standards someone else said you should live by.
Heck, just love yourself. Don't try to rush the process. Be patient with yourself. Don't try to live up to any more "rules" right now beyond loving God and loving your neighbor as yourself. As you examine the rules you're trying to follow, you might just find some of them are leftovers from your twi days that don't really matter.
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waterbuffalo
Pipes,
Remember, too, that Jan/Feb are the depression months for lots of people because they are the darkest months of the year ( someone help me here, please, lack of seratonin or something like that). Once the sunlight shines more each day and the days become longer, this too will disappear. I'm that way, too (except for a couple of years when I took a liquid herb combination to balance my hormones).
So, basically, what I'm saying is that it's normal for a certain portion of the population to feel a little depressed during these months and get into a funk. It will soon be over. Once I realized what was causing it and why winter was a challenge for me, it was easier to overcome it.
I'm glad you're here!
Take care,
wb
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justloafing
Bagpipes, Your last post thanking us all for putting up with your "jibberish". Not jibberish to us since many of us have gone through some if not all of the same things.
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rascal
Pipes, Life is GOOD! I have spent WAY too many years doing other peoples will....not to thoroughly enjoy every single moment of my remaining life doing what pleases me personally.
It is a good thing my spouse understands this....because we (daughter and I) brought two more horses home this week that needed a home...for a total of 9.
We have 7 dogs 5 of them HUGE....4 cats....too many turtles and hamsters and iguannas and geckos to mention....not to mention a tortoise who will reach 145 lbs in weight in the next 8 yrs....
What profit are they? None what so EVER....matter of fact they cost an enormous amount to care for...but the kids and I enjoy them...so we continue to rescue every stray we lay hands on.
Does my house work get done? Oh HAYAL no....but this week we DID play in the creek, hunt fossels, ride horses and go to our karate classes.
Is THAT decent and in order? Oh HAYAL no....but we sure are a heck of lot happier than when everything WAS!!!
What I am saying is that I think that what we do in this life is simply our business to either be happy doing what we please or making ourselves miserable suiting somebody ELSES idea of what they think we OUGHT to be doing....this includes our personal responsibilities.
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T-Bone
Thanks for sharing, Bagpipes - the stuff in this and many other threads is WHY I come to Grease Spot! Morgan, Wayfer Not and Belle mentioned counseling – and I personally will vouch for professional counseling helping to sort things out. I grew up in an extremely dysfunctional family, and on top of that, depression runs in my family. I say this to let you know TWI didn't screw me up in the first place – but it sure helped to make matters worse.
ChasUFarley and Rascal shared some helpful thoughts: Share, connect, allow yourself to be human, God equipped you with emotions, we all go through different stages in our recovery and experience different emotions…After leaving TWI I tried to handle all my mental baggage from only an intellectual level – and by myself. I was pretty good at suppressing my feelings and would lose myself in my job with as much devotion as I gave TWI. Fortunately, my wife loved me enough to threaten to leave me if we didn't see a marriage counselor [which we did] and see a psychiatrist for depression [which I did].
If I have anything, further to add for helpful hints on recovery it is that YOU are the key element in the PROCESS. That may be obvious to you but let me explain [and the Café knows how I love to do that]. What has been my shortcoming in the recovery process has been thinking I can dissect all my mental baggage with a cold, clinical, objective, analytical [okay – I can't think of any more words] approach – and do that by myself. I'm realizing there's a whole lot of emotional stuff, feelings, memories, relationships that I have to deal with as well – that's why I capitalized "YOU" – it's the whole you [intellect, emotions, memories, etc.].
The other word I capitalized above was "PROCESS" – I call it that because there's some work you have to do. Yeah, you're gonna pray and ask God for help [that's part of the process] – but maybe it's like how we learn to walk. Our parents may have held us up at first – but we eventually got the idea and feel of using our own muscles and coordination. Part of the process for me is coming to Grease Spot. Sometimes I just read, sometimes I share. Sometimes my wife and I will talk about something we read on Grease Spot. My point in this is that a process is going on – whether you share on Grease Spot or to a spouse or friend – you're having to articulate the stuff that's churning inside. And you may get feedback and a different perspective from your audience.
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I Love Bagpipes
(Oh geez...I just wrote a reply and went to post it and it went out in cyberspace somewhere. :blink: So I'm gonna' try another time. It's just harder after that initial inspiration...ya' know?)
Thanks again!!!! You guys have been grand and I have read and reread these posts. I have considered and acted upon some of them. Chunks of perspective (yours) have helped me see that these chunks are not so much an intrusion as necessary realizations, stuff that needs to be jostled around, dug up, looked at, and honored. It's comforting that I don't have to understand it all (the chunks) or be able to explain it. You guys KNOW it because you have lived it. The connections have been awesome..the emails, phone calls, PMs, posts, and chats.
I've allowed myself to be engrossed with GSC these past weeks and (for me) I have posted a lot(your suggestion
). I have revisted 2 of my docs (your prompting 
). I have bared my soul and you have honored and respected that and have been kind with my heart. I know you know the vulnerabilty one feels when one decides to share on these forums. It is a HUGE step for me to be so public with my inner workings and vulnerabilities. Thank you for honoring that and for your kindness and respect.
I know this healing happens in cycles, layers, etc. As part of this process I've decided to take a GSC fast. (But I probably won't fast from chat. :) ) I don't know for how long. I'm gonna' take some time and try to wrap my mind around some other stuff and see what emerges (your suggestions
)
I applaud you! And may I add, "Yea God!!!"
So thanks many times over. And let me know where I need to send the payment for the services!! ^_^
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Xena
Hi Bagpipes! I write this as I listen to Celtic music. Bagpipes, indeed.
Someone has already suggested getting a different Bible. This was a big step for me. I didn't want to throw out the Word, but I couldn't read it without re-living so much pain. Same thing with prayer.
Here's what I learned. "The Message" Bible is still the Word, but it doesn't bring on the flashbacks. You'll love it.
And when you pray, don't pray Way-style (Thank you Father for ............ fill in the blank ........... whatever it is you're praying for). How arrogant ! How manipulative ! How dare anyone thank God for something before they have it - as if they know what God will do next. Do you remember how to work the Word? Well, work it ... study the Lord's prayer, the way Jesus taught folks to pray. It's so different than what we learned.
Don't punctuate you prayer with "Thank you Father", but rather "Thy will be done". It's so much more respectful. And besides, eventually you'll start believing it: THY WILL BE DONE !!!!! So nice to put it all in His hands, instead of thinking that your own behavior is what determines your blessings or lack of blessings.
Regarding counselors - I've seen plenty. But Greasespot is the best, because you don't have to spend 45 minutes of your one-hour session, explaining the rituals and abuses of TWI. People here already know that stuff, so you can just go right ahead and unload without the pre-explanations. Counselors don't understand what we've been through.
However, one counselor gave me some advice that has definitely helped. She said I should remember, remember way back to before I ever heard of TWI. And then remember something that made me happy. And DO THAT THING. Do what made you happy before TWI. For me it was painting. And now, many paintings later, seven years later to be exact, I am approaching happiness.
It's been a long strange trip. But I'm getting there. Lots of us are. It's your turn now. Xena
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dmiller
Amen!! :)
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templelady
How to release all that pent up anger
{Warning this is a very messy exercise but it works}
Find a large area with a wall --the basement if it has a drain on the floor is good. the side of the house is good--the kitchen if you must
Move any thing you don't want to have to clean (furniture) out of the area.
cover the floor space with newspaper spread it out over the area --out side have the hose ready
Depending on how angry you are--hard boil about 1 1/2-3 dozen eggs I mean really hard boil them say 15 minutes on a good rolling boil
cool the eggs
on each egg write the name of the person/ situation you are angry at
now stand back about 10-20 feet
picture that person as the egg--that person is the egg
hurl said egg at the wall as hard as you can
watch the person/egg explode into little itty bitty pieces
repeat until 1) your arm is tired 2) the mess is more than you can stand 3) you feel satisfied
repeat as needed.
Clean
in addition to the emotional satisfaction of "exploding" the source of you anger you get a good workout for the cardio system-- the exploded egg bits make a great food source for the birds and squirrels
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