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You Might Be From Wisconsin

bowtwi

By bowtwi,
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bowtwi Newbie

bowtwi

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Jeff Foxworthy on Wisconsin

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 38 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Wisconsin.

If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each year because Park Falls is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Wisconsin.

If you have ever refused to buy something because it's "too spendy," you might live in Wisconsin.

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Wisconsin.

If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, you might live in Wisconsin.

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Wisconsin.

If your dad’s suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Wisconsin.

If you may not have actually eaten it, but you have heard of Head Cheese, you might live in Wisconsin.

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Wisconsin.

If you have either a pet or a child named "Brett," you m! ight live in Wisconsin.

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Wisconsin.

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you might live in Wisconsin.

If you know how to say Oconomowoc, Waukesha, Menomonie & Manitowoc, you might live in Wisconsin.

If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy, you might! live in Wisconsin.

If every time you see moonlight on a lake, you think of a dancing bear, and you sing gently, "From the land of sky-blue waters ...you might live in Wisconsin.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE WISCONSINITE WHEN:

1. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.

2. "Vacation” means going up north past Hwy 8 for the weekend.

3. You measure distance in hours.

4. You know several people who have hit deer more than once.

5. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and back again.

6. Your whole family wears Packer Green to church on Sunday.

7. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow! during a raging blizzard, without flinching.

8. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings and funerals).

9. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.

10. You think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and venison.

11. You carry jumper cables in your car and your wife or girlfriend knows how to use them.

12. There are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill's Fleet Farm at any given time.

13. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

14. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.

15. You refer to the Packers as "we."

16. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.

17. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.

18. You have no problem pronouncing Lac du Flambeau.

19. You consider Minneapolis exotic.

20. You know how to polka.

21. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.

22. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.

23. Down South to you means Illinois.

24. A brat is something you eat.

25. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole shed.

26. You go out to fish fry every Friday

27. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

28. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

29. You find minus twenty degrees "a little chilly."

30. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Wisconsin friends.

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bowtwi Newbie

bowtwi

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Black flies in mud season, tee hee! You can keep 'em, but thanks!!!

Yep Moony, you're right - I forgot all about the stock car races - sheesh, what WAS I thinking???

Personally, I DO miss the Friday night fish fries. I had found a place on Seminole Blvd, east of Ulmerton about a half mile I believe, named Sherrie's that had a decent fish fry, right there in Largo, FL. I'm not 100% sure, but I think I remember it being beer batter cod. I haven't eaten there in about 5 years, so I don't know how it is nowadays...

Likeaeagle - WHEN didn't they have sales tax in WI? I lived there for 32 years and as recently as weekend before last I paid sales tax in Coloma. FL and TN, I believe it is, don't have State Income Tax, but I don't know of any state that doesn't impose sales tax. (Not that I'm an expert on the subject.)

That Jeff Foxworthy sure is a hoot!

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bowtwi Newbie

bowtwi

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Ha ha, I forgot the name as well as directions in the year and a half since I've left FL, and I had moved out near Lakeland for a couple or few years before leaving FL. Oh well, it's a sign of life (being forgetful) - I'm thinking dead people don't forget stuff so I don't mind so much.

It's actually called Sher's Kitchen.

Sher's Kitchen10251 Seminole Blvd

Largo, FL 33778-4202var version = new String(navigator.appVersion);if(navigator.appName == "Microsoft Internet Explorer"){if (version.toLowerCase().indexOf("mac") != -1){document.write("

")}}

space.gifspace.gif

space.gif

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bowtwi Newbie

bowtwi

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Likeaeagle - Must be food tax, I've never heard of food tax. Sounds weird. I never have gotten to where I don't mind paying for water - that just seems so wrong, like why stop there, why not tax the sunshine. Oh wait, they do - it's called Floridian wages.

Moony - Bestill my heart! Say it ain't so! I hope someone buys it and makes a go of it. Hope your mouth is void of pain.

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dmiller Newbie

dmiller

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Dang, Bow --- That list of yours describes a buncha Minney-sotans too!

Here a traffic jam is two guys driving pickups stopped in the middle of the road, and a third one behind them waiting to join the conversation!

and you're truely Minney-sotan, if you know that *lutefisk* is a clean word.

or if you buy 50 pounds of salt for your sidewalk, and 12 ounces for your food.

or if you know that *choppers* means mittens, not motorcycles.

or if you know that *bunny boots* have nothing to do with rabbits.

Or if you see jumper cables attached from one car to another --

You think they are mating!!

:D

(ps -- at the grocery store yesterday, I saw 8 running vehicles in the parking lot with no one inside, and it was only 15 degrees here. That's mild by our standards.)

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mstar1 Newbie

mstar1

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I hope it isn't just bad flashbacks? I didn't know they sent WOW to Largo? What year?

No, just long ago memories that I had forgotten---It was 1982, Tampa-St Pete was an outreach city, there were a hundred and some that were sent there, I was sent to Largo and lived off of Belcher somewhere.

The "Seminole and Ulmerton" line tripped a memory--we ran a class on tape right near that intersection that kept getting interrupted by the radio station right across the street (somehow their signal overpowered our system).

Just as VP was doing the tongues thing in session 12, Van Halen came blasting through the speakers singing "Running with the devil....".

The timing was perfect!

Edited by mstar1
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