I know the feeling Ex. I'm active on a couple other forums and I know the pain of just writing out a couple thoughts and having people jump down my throat.
Stick around. Lurk in in the background if you must, but don't leave.
Hey I love ya, and I don't react to your writings.
Sometimes when I'm feeling blue, all I have to do is read "Life is Tremendous" by Charlie Jones. Its only 95 pages, and I've had this book for over 30 yrs. Charlie Jones was never in TWI, yet it came highly recommended for good reason....
I think of this place more as a place where we don't HAVE to be ourselves. And that, I think, is not all a bad thing...the ability to be anonymous, and so forth.
Maybe I'm the only one who read your post and didn't get the impression that you were leaving GS. I just got the impression that you realize that you can't "hide" here. That's true. Hopefully, you can be as straight with people in the "real world" as you are in cyberspace. You do have friends here, though; and you will be missed if you leave.
You have a grip B) It's like 3 point climbing ... you have one grip here, one grip with your other friends, a grip with your family ... well ... something like that
i have this fine life in which i interact face-to-face with human beings
but i've always felt this was my safe haven and the only place i could be myself
but that's not true at all
i think it comes from believing you can only be understood by fellow cult members
what a bunch of bullsheet
this "family" stuff, it's nice to believe for a while....
Seems to me there are some things better understood by ex wayfers or ex corps, but there are many parallels in the real world. I hung out with a bunch of Chevron/Amoco/Texaco folks after TWI and I noticed a lot of the same power struggles, infidelities, abuse of power, leaders making decisions for you ... mixed with some good people. (Of course they got paid to put up with that BS, instead of paying) This seems like a good place to philosophize about that human nature crap, which is universal I s'pose.
Anyway, I don't have anything figured out, but it seems like multiple circles of social interaction is good ... and online seems to allow a different level of communication.
The "family" stuff, I'm not sure what you mean. TWI tried to convince us to put them first, I don't see that here. I haven't formed any "family like" bonds here, but you have probably formed tighter connections considering the time and heart you've invested. I'd think that is worth hanging on to, at some level at least. In TWI I moved about every year for 10 years ... not sure if I was predisposed to that kind of life or what ... but longer term "friends" seems a better way to go. If this is just sort of a cultist version of AA, well then maybe that is OK too.
I hope you keep being yourself here ... but not because you're my Corps "sister" ;) just 'cuz you "shoot from the hip" as they say. Your other friends would probably enjoy you "being yourself" with them too. I'm still deciding what I want my "self" to be lol ... How the hell did you figure that out? :P
Awwwww, pshaw, excie! You can be yourself where ever you are and with whomever you are. You are a dear, charming, warm, loving, kind and witty person. Everyone, cult experiences or not, appreciates that about you.
I have awesome internet friends (some I've never even met, others I e-mail every day, but only see about once every few years). Some from here and some from other boards. I talk about cult stuff with the people here and about common interests with the other folks that are non-cult related. We talk about a lot of non-cult stuff here, too. :)
I also have friends I see face to face and many of them I don't even have e-mail addresses for. B) I try to spend time with everyone, but sometimes my time is more slanted one way than the other. It's all good!
Finding the balance is an ongoing thing. It depends on where my personal needs and/or interests are at the time. Sometimes I really need healing or to vent about my ex, TWI and related issues. Other times I need a hug and a friend to watch a tear jerker of a chick flick with....
You'll find that balance and know that you can be yourself with whomever you're around. You'll be a big huge ray of sunshine in their lives like you are in ours. :wub: :wub: :wub:
It's always good to have the realization that the people who you interact every day with love and appreciate you and to give them the priority.I've been thinking about not checking in anymore.
There are boxes to unpack, dinners to cook, mediating and stress relief that would be healthy, and maybe it's just time to unplug for awhile.
When I get on my pity pot and get tired of feeling miserable a quote by Abraham Lincoln seems to sooth me: People are as a happy as they make up their minds to be.Another thing that helps me is I get out my Louise Hay "Power Cards" and look through them. They are brightly colored affirmation cards and they help inspire me out of my negative thinking. There are a whole bunch of affirmation cards available today. When I remember I have a spiritual tool kit for the mood swings and irritablity I feel and use it, my misery is short lived.
Hmm. I like the three-point climbing analogy by Rhino, and also the "finding the balance is an ongoing thing" remark by Belle, and lots of the other comments made by folks here.
It's a support system, and a sense of shared experiences, and therapy. Not just therapy received, for which I'm very grateful, but also therapy given, which we all also have a need to give. We are a community of people uniquely qualified to minister to one another, because we have a shared set of experiences which are (thankfully!) rather unique.
Greasespot is a ministry to ministers, both former and current; it is for those who are burned out, and those who are still on fire.
And those somewhere in the middle.
The ministering isn't always warm and fuzzy. Sometimes we need hugs, but sometimes we have our heads on crooked, and we need somebody to "rip us a new one." Who but a brother or sister would have the courage to do that?
The advice given here is generally well spoken; it often has been purchased by painful experience by those who offer it.
your replies are really good, i appreciate them. sometimes i have a tendency to think things have to be BLACK OR WHITE, ALL OR NOTHING
as far as being my "self" ~ that seems to change every day, if not more often
i don't go on any other boards. i've thought about those crime ones like cybersleuths or whatever, but i don't want to get into it because i'll never get off the computer
thanks again. i read every single reply and they meant A LOT to me. i don't have time to respond individually to each. sorry.
Love ya sis...You better not leave.. I see your NJ Devils won last night...my boy Brian Gionta scored two...got to see him play HS hockey here in Rochester
hills, WOW you're kidding you got to see him play in high school !!!!! what did you think then ? did you KNOW he would be a pro ? tell me everything. should i move my questions to the sports section ???? but i guess since i started this thread, i can allow derails (i love choo choo's) it's almost conversation
the other night i was sitting with the mom of this fellow at a game
Recommended Posts
ChattyKathy
You may not believe it but I wish you'd stay. I need you to be here. You can crack me up like no one can. And that's just one thing.
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Jim
I know the feeling Ex. I'm active on a couple other forums and I know the pain of just writing out a couple thoughts and having people jump down my throat.
Stick around. Lurk in in the background if you must, but don't leave.
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markomalley
If you're concerned, wean yourself off of it for a month or so. Then come back...
Regardless, I normally like reading your stuff.
BTW, why did you take the "Mother Angelica" avatar off? I thought it was cute!!!
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dmiller
Am active on other boards too, where music is the big discussion.
I inter-act *face to face* too in daily life, with the internet being *The Other Side*.
Both are a safe haven for me,
and I feel welcomed, and understood by both.
Life can be good (if you let it!)
Hmmmm.
David
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jetc57
Hey I love ya, and I don't react to your writings.
Sometimes when I'm feeling blue, all I have to do is read "Life is Tremendous" by Charlie Jones. Its only 95 pages, and I've had this book for over 30 yrs. Charlie Jones was never in TWI, yet it came highly recommended for good reason....
check this out for a nice spiritual lift. OK?
http://www.wisehearts.com/yaam.html
God Bless You -- You are PRECIOUS!!!
Please keep a song in your heart and a smile on your lovely face.
Jet
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Pirate1974
Some of us would really miss you if you weren't here, excathie.
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krys
yeah - - what Pirate said.
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Lifted Up
I think of this place more as a place where we don't HAVE to be ourselves. And that, I think, is not all a bad thing...the ability to be anonymous, and so forth.
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GeorgeStGeorge
Hey, Excie!
Maybe I'm the only one who read your post and didn't get the impression that you were leaving GS. I just got the impression that you realize that you can't "hide" here. That's true. Hopefully, you can be as straight with people in the "real world" as you are in cyberspace. You do have friends here, though; and you will be missed if you leave.
George
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frank123lol
exie,We like ya,For me you have a very unique outllok,As far as the cult thing I agree how wierd is that?
Well we all were in the cult so we aint right.
I too relate to people now much better than in said cult.
Take care.... :D :D :D
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rhino
You have a grip B) It's like 3 point climbing ... you have one grip here, one grip with your other friends, a grip with your family ... well ... something like that
Seems to me there are some things better understood by ex wayfers or ex corps, but there are many parallels in the real world. I hung out with a bunch of Chevron/Amoco/Texaco folks after TWI and I noticed a lot of the same power struggles, infidelities, abuse of power, leaders making decisions for you ... mixed with some good people. (Of course they got paid to put up with that BS, instead of paying) This seems like a good place to philosophize about that human nature crap, which is universal I s'pose.
Anyway, I don't have anything figured out, but it seems like multiple circles of social interaction is good ... and online seems to allow a different level of communication.
The "family" stuff, I'm not sure what you mean. TWI tried to convince us to put them first, I don't see that here. I haven't formed any "family like" bonds here, but you have probably formed tighter connections considering the time and heart you've invested. I'd think that is worth hanging on to, at some level at least. In TWI I moved about every year for 10 years ... not sure if I was predisposed to that kind of life or what ... but longer term "friends" seems a better way to go. If this is just sort of a cultist version of AA, well then maybe that is OK too.
I hope you keep being yourself here ... but not because you're my Corps "sister" ;) just 'cuz you "shoot from the hip" as they say. Your other friends would probably enjoy you "being yourself" with them too. I'm still deciding what I want my "self" to be lol ... How the hell did you figure that out? :P
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Belle
Awwwww, pshaw, excie! You can be yourself where ever you are and with whomever you are. You are a dear, charming, warm, loving, kind and witty person. Everyone, cult experiences or not, appreciates that about you.
I have awesome internet friends (some I've never even met, others I e-mail every day, but only see about once every few years). Some from here and some from other boards. I talk about cult stuff with the people here and about common interests with the other folks that are non-cult related. We talk about a lot of non-cult stuff here, too. :)
I also have friends I see face to face and many of them I don't even have e-mail addresses for. B) I try to spend time with everyone, but sometimes my time is more slanted one way than the other. It's all good!
Finding the balance is an ongoing thing. It depends on where my personal needs and/or interests are at the time. Sometimes I really need healing or to vent about my ex, TWI and related issues. Other times I need a hug and a friend to watch a tear jerker of a chick flick with....
You'll find that balance and know that you can be yourself with whomever you're around. You'll be a big huge ray of sunshine in their lives like you are in ours. :wub: :wub: :wub:
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Reikildy
It's always good to have the realization that the people who you interact every day with love and appreciate you and to give them the priority.I've been thinking about not checking in anymore.
There are boxes to unpack, dinners to cook, mediating and stress relief that would be healthy, and maybe it's just time to unplug for awhile.
When I get on my pity pot and get tired of feeling miserable a quote by Abraham Lincoln seems to sooth me: People are as a happy as they make up their minds to be.Another thing that helps me is I get out my Louise Hay "Power Cards" and look through them. They are brightly colored affirmation cards and they help inspire me out of my negative thinking. There are a whole bunch of affirmation cards available today. When I remember I have a spiritual tool kit for the mood swings and irritablity I feel and use it, my misery is short lived.
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notinKansasanymore
Hmm. I like the three-point climbing analogy by Rhino, and also the "finding the balance is an ongoing thing" remark by Belle, and lots of the other comments made by folks here.
It's a support system, and a sense of shared experiences, and therapy. Not just therapy received, for which I'm very grateful, but also therapy given, which we all also have a need to give. We are a community of people uniquely qualified to minister to one another, because we have a shared set of experiences which are (thankfully!) rather unique.
Greasespot is a ministry to ministers, both former and current; it is for those who are burned out, and those who are still on fire.
And those somewhere in the middle.
The ministering isn't always warm and fuzzy. Sometimes we need hugs, but sometimes we have our heads on crooked, and we need somebody to "rip us a new one." Who but a brother or sister would have the courage to do that?
The advice given here is generally well spoken; it often has been purchased by painful experience by those who offer it.
It's a heck of a deal.
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krys
Nika - - that was a great post. Thank you.
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ChattyKathy
I agree with Krys.
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ex10
Hey sisex,
I think you are a total b....and enjoy it. B)
Why pretend to be anything else? :blink:
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excathedra
i didn't mean this to be a goodbye thread :o
your replies are really good, i appreciate them. sometimes i have a tendency to think things have to be BLACK OR WHITE, ALL OR NOTHING
as far as being my "self" ~ that seems to change every day, if not more often
i don't go on any other boards. i've thought about those crime ones like cybersleuths or whatever, but i don't want to get into it because i'll never get off the computer
thanks again. i read every single reply and they meant A LOT to me. i don't have time to respond individually to each. sorry.
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Hills Bro
Love ya sis...You better not leave.. I see your NJ Devils won last night...my boy Brian Gionta scored two...got to see him play HS hockey here in Rochester
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ChattyKathy
Thank YOU!
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excathedra
awwww no thank YOU :)
--
hills, WOW you're kidding you got to see him play in high school !!!!! what did you think then ? did you KNOW he would be a pro ? tell me everything. should i move my questions to the sports section ???? but i guess since i started this thread, i can allow derails (i love choo choo's) it's almost conversation
the other night i was sitting with the mom of this fellow at a game
[img ] http://www.trentontitans.com/player-detail.asp?pid=157] [/img] i hope that comes out ok
obviously it didn't
Sorry, dynamic pages in the tags are not allowed
what does that mean ? how do i post a picture of a guy ? i don't know if he's really that dynamic. i guess that's why hills could post his ;)
is syracuse near rochester ?
[ url=http://www.trentontitans.com/player-detail.asp?pid=157]i don't know the title [/url]
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krys
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excathedra
thank you kryssie
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socks
Sufferin' sucotash! I'm so embare-assed! :D
Wait-People, we need some comfort food here. Can we get an order of fries, extra grease, with a side of cholesterol cakes?
One quarter, one tune, some blues please, something funky that Bo Diddly would dig: On This Highway
B)
"On this highway, I thought I had a friend.
Guess what?
I was wrong again.
I'm gonna ride.
Ride, ride, ride.
On this highway, the wheel's spinnin' round.
The wheel's gonna spin right into the ground.
I'm gonna ride.
Ride, ride, ride.
On this highway you can never tell.
One man's heaven, another man's hell
I'm gonna ride.
Ride, ride ride.
On this highway they don't even want you to try.
Just sit around
Wait to die.
I'm gonna ride.
Ride, ride, ride."
Studebaker John & The Hawks
edited all kindsa times...because I can.... :)
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