A law enforcement officer stops a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. Since he's in a good mood that day he decides to give the poor fellow a break and write him out a warning instead of a ticket. So, he asks the man his name.
"Fred," he replies.
"Fred what?" the officer asks.
"Just Fred," the man responds.
When the officer presses him for a last name, the man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it. The officer thinks he has a
nutcase on his hands, but plays along with it.
"Tell me Fred, how did you lose your last name?"
The man replies, "It's a long story so stay with me. I was born Fred Dingaling. I know, funny last name. The kids used to tease me all the time. So I stayed to myself. I studied hard and got good. When I got older, I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Dingaling, MD.
After a while I got bored being a doctor so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream. Got all the way through school, got my degree so I was now Fred Dingaling, MD, DDS.
Got bored doing dentistry so I started fooling around with my assistant. She gave me VD. So, I was Fred Dingaling, MD, DDS with VD.
Well, the ADA (American Dental Association) found out about the VD so they took away my DDS so I was Fred Dingaling MD with VD.
Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD, leaving me as Fred Dingaling with VD. Then you can just imagine what took away my dingaling so now I'm just Fred."
The officer walked away in tears, laughing so hard, and tore up the warning ticket.
This is off thread topic, but since you are from Colorado, do you by chance know the Hobbs sisters? Donna and Janet? Sweet nice gals. They are the sisters of Ed Hobbs the guy who owned and ran Grande Lake Log Homes. Just curious.
I went on a few dates with Donna when I was in the Tenth Corps..
In light of such highly publicized cases as William Kennedy Smith, Kirby Puckett, Kobe Bryant and Bill Clinton, Dr. Ava Cadell, a California sex therapist, has created a "sexual consent form," that she suggests should be signed before entering in to any consensual sex act. Herewith:
SEXUAL CONSENT FORM & RIGHT OF PRIVACY AGREEMENT
I,____________________, hereby declare under penalty of perjury that I am over 18 years old.
I further declare that this agreement is of my own free will and that neither I nor anyone near or dear to me has been threatened with harm or embarrassment.
Both parties agree that this is a private agreement not to be disclosed to third parties except in case of accusation of sexual misconduct by_____________________of____________________.
If he shows or makes public this agreement with accusation of sexual misconduct, it is agreed that he will be liable for damages for invasion of privacy, whether or not his signature appears herein.
By initialing____________________, agrees to engage in all or some of the following consensual acts.
Sexual fondling, petting and kissing____________
Sexual intercourse____________
Oral copulation (mutual)____________
Unilateral copulation by____________only.
Other, to be specified:
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
I further declare that I am at this time not under the influence of alcohol drugs or medication and agree to engage in consensual sex with____________________and not to change my mind before the sex act is over. However, it is further understood that if I, for any reason, say the words "Code Red" that means I have serious emotional or physical problems and my partner agrees to stop instantly.
Signed__________________________Date____________
Signed__________________________Date____________
Copyright Dr. Ava Cadell, Clinical Sexologist, 2004
**********************************
Romantic, is it not? "Code Red?" I guess a simple "No" just doesn't work these days.
Unilateral copulation???
According to Dr. Cadell, this document is not just for the rich and famous, but anyone who needs to protect themselves from false accusations. The good doctor says that this agreement can enable you and your partner to "literally open up a form of intimate communication prior to rushing into sex." I'm sure that whipping out this form at the appropriate time would open up some kind of communication for sure.
No mention of whether or not you should have the document notarized.
[This message was edited by Pirate1974 on January 30, 2004 at 15:43.]
Hey Jard, it's good to know that something nice is going on with such a sweet gal. On a farm in Upstate New York. Not quite Colorado, but certainly beautiful up there.
Ok, now back to SEX. Yeah, I really love it. Glad God invented it to be sure :)-->
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well, ok then!
Stress management counselor... has a certain ring to it.
;)-->
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LiarLiarPantsOnFire
Heres a joke some of you may appreciate.
A law enforcement officer stops a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. Since he's in a good mood that day he decides to give the poor fellow a break and write him out a warning instead of a ticket. So, he asks the man his name.
"Fred," he replies.
"Fred what?" the officer asks.
"Just Fred," the man responds.
When the officer presses him for a last name, the man tells him that he used to have a last name but lost it. The officer thinks he has a
nutcase on his hands, but plays along with it.
"Tell me Fred, how did you lose your last name?"
The man replies, "It's a long story so stay with me. I was born Fred Dingaling. I know, funny last name. The kids used to tease me all the time. So I stayed to myself. I studied hard and got good. When I got older, I realized that I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Dingaling, MD.
After a while I got bored being a doctor so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream. Got all the way through school, got my degree so I was now Fred Dingaling, MD, DDS.
Got bored doing dentistry so I started fooling around with my assistant. She gave me VD. So, I was Fred Dingaling, MD, DDS with VD.
Well, the ADA (American Dental Association) found out about the VD so they took away my DDS so I was Fred Dingaling MD with VD.
Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD, leaving me as Fred Dingaling with VD. Then you can just imagine what took away my dingaling so now I'm just Fred."
The officer walked away in tears, laughing so hard, and tore up the warning ticket.
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J0nny Ling0
TakeMeThere
This is off thread topic, but since you are from Colorado, do you by chance know the Hobbs sisters? Donna and Janet? Sweet nice gals. They are the sisters of Ed Hobbs the guy who owned and ran Grande Lake Log Homes. Just curious.
I went on a few dates with Donna when I was in the Tenth Corps..
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Pirate1974
In light of such highly publicized cases as William Kennedy Smith, Kirby Puckett, Kobe Bryant and Bill Clinton, Dr. Ava Cadell, a California sex therapist, has created a "sexual consent form," that she suggests should be signed before entering in to any consensual sex act. Herewith:
SEXUAL CONSENT FORM & RIGHT OF PRIVACY AGREEMENT
I,____________________, hereby declare under penalty of perjury that I am over 18 years old.
I further declare that this agreement is of my own free will and that neither I nor anyone near or dear to me has been threatened with harm or embarrassment.
Both parties agree that this is a private agreement not to be disclosed to third parties except in case of accusation of sexual misconduct by_____________________of____________________.
If he shows or makes public this agreement with accusation of sexual misconduct, it is agreed that he will be liable for damages for invasion of privacy, whether or not his signature appears herein.
By initialing____________________, agrees to engage in all or some of the following consensual acts.
Sexual fondling, petting and kissing____________
Sexual intercourse____________
Oral copulation (mutual)____________
Unilateral copulation by____________only.
Other, to be specified:
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
I further declare that I am at this time not under the influence of alcohol drugs or medication and agree to engage in consensual sex with____________________and not to change my mind before the sex act is over. However, it is further understood that if I, for any reason, say the words "Code Red" that means I have serious emotional or physical problems and my partner agrees to stop instantly.
Signed__________________________Date____________
Signed__________________________Date____________
Copyright Dr. Ava Cadell, Clinical Sexologist, 2004
**********************************
Romantic, is it not? "Code Red?" I guess a simple "No" just doesn't work these days.
Unilateral copulation???
According to Dr. Cadell, this document is not just for the rich and famous, but anyone who needs to protect themselves from false accusations. The good doctor says that this agreement can enable you and your partner to "literally open up a form of intimate communication prior to rushing into sex." I'm sure that whipping out this form at the appropriate time would open up some kind of communication for sure.
No mention of whether or not you should have the document notarized.
[This message was edited by Pirate1974 on January 30, 2004 at 15:43.]
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sadie
once knew a DR. Long Wong Dong...
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takemethere
Jonny L- Once upon a time I knew E.H. Haven't seen him in a while- Didn't know his sisters.
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jardinero
Hi Johnny:
J. Hobbs is remarried and lives with hubby and kids in upstate NY on a farm. Doing great. Very, very happy.
J.
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J0nny Ling0
Hey Jard, it's good to know that something nice is going on with such a sweet gal. On a farm in Upstate New York. Not quite Colorado, but certainly beautiful up there.
Ok, now back to SEX. Yeah, I really love it. Glad God invented it to be sure
:)-->
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shiftthis
Where is Frank to discuss this topic ?
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