the world is not a very nice place at times, and i never realized that until i had kids,
i to miss the days when the neighborhood kids hung out till dark, and then went home cause ur friends mother told u to.
because of the way the world is, parents work very hard(in my area) to find places for the kids to interact w/other kids, so try-outs r now a thing of the past, i don't know if that's good or bad, but it is.
i fought the trend for as long as i could but most children in the ny/nj metro area by the time they are 2 are involved in structured activities.
and then parental quilt kicks in and man that kick is the worst.
so i choose my arguments with my kids, no tv in there rooms (i know bad mommy bad) no computer w/o mom or dad in room, and yea i read my 10 year olds e-mail, not because i don't trust him, but because i don't trust to many other people.
I don't have kids. I know nothing about raising kids. I'm just waxing nostalgic on what is was like for me to be a kid.
But since you brought it up-why WERE you going on the court ? You've got very intelligent daughters.
LOL hiway, bless yer gizzard.
I wasn't throwing nuttin atcha, I was just making some kind of point.
I was going out there because when he'd give the girls their instructions, I'd need to know:
that my kid knew what to he meant
did she need me
did she want me to show her what he meant
Should I sweep the floor ahead of her
GUFFAW, I don't know. I had no business going out there, it embarassed my kid and intruded on the coach's job.
My daughters are indeed very intelligent, but I have this thing called "mama will always be there to be sure everything is ok and even if I get in the way I don't care cuz it's my job"
I think there's always going to be a somewhat different approach to youth sports between men and women,and I think that's a good thing,really...I'll be sitting with the dads,and you'll hear all the moms a-hootin' and a-hollerin' cuz' their little Johnnie made it to first base when the catcher dropped strike three,and the dad's all p.o.ed because little Johnnie didn't swing the bat like he's been trying to teach him all this time...
I remember a young man,about 10,standing at home plate,in his stance,bat cocked and ready to swing and suddenly started peeing his pants,wetting the batter's box...We all tried to act nonchalant,but everybody knew what happened...I've wondered if that kid is going to grow up one day and be a great motivational speaker,addressing his audience: "Hey,what are you afraid of?..What could possibly embarrass you more than I was that day at the batter's box?"...
when my david was 5 he was asked to move up from training to t-ball he was thrilled, me i had already cleared a room for his tropheys, later i found out that the 6 year old team would close w/o my kid, fair enough, so he played w/ 7-8 yr olds (ok glorified water boy but happy)he road the bench the whole season..but happy, we were in first pl. championship nailed, so i figured would it hurt for my kid to play 1 inning? (of course rules of little league are rough every child must play 3 innings a game, i never said anything dave was happy) so i walked over to the coach and in my nicest mommy voice asked if perhaps my son who saved their team could get 1 inning in...
"NO, you see this is an important game and yudda yudda yudda." I attempted to explain to this man that statistically speaking we had clintched the championship 3 games ago...
and yea I became a Mother quoted little league rules and insited he be played. He had done his bit for the team, and this is supposed to be fun right?
yes david played..i would love to say he went up and hit a homerun..no struck-out. the outfield wasn't much better, but he played
the next year Jemma Brokers took the championship, and it looks like it could be a repeat
i sure hope so but we'll see and even if we don't come June there will be 14 screaming 10-11yr old boys jumping in the pool, eating to much and me standing on the side smiling
Before the age of 10 or 11, kid sports should be about learning the game, everybody getting to play and having fun. By the time a kid reaches middle school age, the ones that are really interested still want to play and those who aren't have probably dropped out. There's plenty of time then for tryouts and cuts and only the best players getting to play.
The league I was part of, which was associated with Babe Ruth baseball, the 5 & 6-year olds played t-ball, the 7 & 8 year olds played "machine pitch" (no pitcher but a pitching machine throws the ball) and at 9 they started having live pitching. I thought that was a great way to introduce kids to the game.
When I was coaching at the 9-10 year old level, I used to rotate players from the infield to the outfield every inning. If you played shortstop one inning, you might play right field the next, then back to shortstop. The kids loved it because at that level, the ball reached the outfield about twice a game and kids got bored standing out there. I had parents complain about that because they thought their kids were getting shortchanged by not learning one position and it hurt our chances to win games. One mother called me at home to tell me her son only wanted to play second base the whole game and asked me not to move him. Ridiculous. We weren't exactly the Boston Red Sox so what difference did it make?
That's one reason I quit coaching baseball. I never seemed to have those problems in basketball for some reason.
I must say that your rudeness to Excathedra was totally uncalled for! I only read the first page, but did you apologize to her? You really should. Frustrations and "politics" in kid sports are very real and hurtful to the kids, and her concern for her son is not about "a mommy being over protective". To slam her with "oh you should be thankful that your kid is not dead, at least he gets to play" is totally unconscionable. Why bring something that heavy into this? ExCath is simply a Mom who loves her son, ok? So, quit bein that way...
Now, Excathedra. Thanks for bringing this up. We have moved to the "big city" of Juneau, and my two boys, aged nine and 12, just went to their first Little League practices yesterday. We had seen lots of screwy things with coaches and kids not being allowed to play because of this "parental political thing" (read: The son of the school principal gets to play more even though his kid sucks at baseball) and all of that.
I have been working forty plus hours a week doing heavy construction, and haven't really focused on the up and coming Little League season, and your thread here has jogged my memory on Little League things. And if I may echo some of the other kindly advice to you already posted, I am sure that things will work out. And, if a boy has a really good arm, it will get noticed anyway. And geez, short stop? That's a killer position to play! Lots and lots of action there to be sure! Have a great season!
oh thank you jonny. i appreciate it very much. i don't think Z's comparison was realistic regarding what advice i was trying to get, but hey....
anyway, things are fine. my kid is happy and outside playing basketball at the moment. he made the pee wee hockey team he wanted to make last night. he can't wait for his next baseball game. and on and on.
i think i was so upset because no one told me the rule and he was crying and just wanted a chance to pitch now and then. and when i called the person to ask about it, he was rude and crude and just plain mean.
so that made me all the more sad and frustrated, not to mention how guilty i felt for signing him up late and causing the whole thing.
i know life is full of lessons, but sometimes you don't want the lesson to be your fault as a parent. but maybe that's a lesson too. stupid parents (me) are not perfect.
after talking to the mayor (who managed little league for YEARS) and talking to you all, and then my brothers and brothers-in-law this weekend (they are coaches and little league vets, etc.), i'm okay, and so is my darling boy
thank you for your kind advice and perspective, all of you. being a mother is hard for me at times. i want to CONTROL his happiness ;)-->.
but this arrogant rude condescending head of the league could have helped me A LOT just by talking to me and explaining how things evolve. but he told me i couldn't understand that 10 years old means "serious ball." and of course i had no right to question "the board."
(i had no preconceived ideas about him until he went nuts on me, with his power, or whatever you call it.)
thank you again. you guys are the greatest.
if i don't watch out for his kid, who will ? ;)-->
For cryin' out loud....give the coach and the league a break. Let them do what they are there to do: teach the kids a few things about throwing and hitting a stupid ball. The sun will rise tomorrow morning.
The best thing your son can take away from this is to learn not to be late. Instead he probably has learned to see himself as a victim.
why don't you shut the **** up ? he has not learned anything about being a victim. you don't think he KNOWS it's because he was singed up late by ME ???? guess what it didn't matter before this year
**** you twice
guess what ? the rules last year were different than this year ?
and they say NOTHING about late sign-ups in the community, on the web site, or over at the field. in fact, they ADVERTISE it's never too late to sign up. i didn't even know what a draft was (neither did he) until this year
again, SCREW YOU
ps. i said NOTHING to the coach or to ANYONE, NOTHING. i called the head of the league to just ask about the "new" rule. and it went downhill from there, by HIS mouth and attitude, not mine.
Cantcha read through the lines just a little bit? Cantcha see that Excath has learned a thing or two, but also that she is just a Mom who loves her son?
Can't you even read? She said and I quote;
quote:
i know life is full of lessons, but sometimes you don't want the lesson to be your fault as a parent. but maybe that's a lesson too. stupid parents (me) are not perfect.
Now come on, what the hell is the matter with being a little bit sensitive to a persons heart for cryin out loud? What do you think this is, a personal shooting gallery provided for you to take aim at every single person's possible mistakes so you can drill 'em straight through the heart?
She said she had made a mistake by signing him up late, she said that it was a lesson learned. But maybe being honest here is too damned dangerous because someone like you might jump all them.
Excath, maybe you shouldn't be so honest, for if you are, someone may see it as a target for them to stomp on, and your heart is more precious than that....
Well now you've pi$$ed her off and I don't blame her one bit.
ExCath, f**k him. Fuggedaboudit. He ain't worth your ire, although he deserves it...
You are a fine Mom, and I know it because of the things you said. And if you are who I think you are, the sister of one of my wife's best friends in the Corps, then I know you come form good stock, and it's no wonder you are the fine person I have come to know here...
Hey stayed to long Since when is questioning the rules a federal offence? I would have done the same thing especially since the rules it sounds like are not even rules yet. What is wrong with going to bat(no Pun intended) for your kid's.
Took whole team for pizza and ice cream only 2 threw up...we had a friggin blast, i'm starting to think i'll buy a league, Whitedove runs concession, Exca u get to be ump, little kids score, rude people get bounced and after the game
As I was preparing my post excathedra made an additional post at 17:00, which I had not yet read. My post was at 17:10.
As the then husband of a former league official and coach, my ex wife was constantly being called by parents who did not like the way she played their child. At games it was a pain just to show up because she would get jumped for not handling this play right, or why didn't she do this instead of that. Believe me there is very little joy from a coach's perspective in children's sports. The reason many do put themselves through the torture and abuse they receive is because no one else will take the position. If they do not do it their kid and others will not get to enjoy the games.
These are volunteers who freely give many hours of their precious time. Two or three practices a week, calling to find out why little Johnny has not been to practice for a while, phoning parents to remind them it is their turn to provide refreshments, calling multiple times to see why Joey has not brought his money for his new uniform.
Today coach's must be constantly on the lookout for being physically attacked and harmed. Verbal abuse if just part of the game anymore and has to be put up with, although some places are putting limits on it now. It seems yelling insults at a coach and critism of how a league or game is run, is a right we have been endowed with by our creator.
I was seeing her post from the perspective of a volunteer who puts up with more abuse than they should ever have to.
I over reacted to excathedra's post and I am sorry. I agree it was not spelled out in the rules so she had a right to question the league.
As the then husband of a former league official and coach, my ex wife was constantly being called by parents who did not like the way she played their child. At games it was a pain just to show up because she would get jumped for not handling this play right, or why didn't she do this instead of that. Believe me there is very little joy from a coach's perspective in children's sports. The reason many do put themselves through the torture and abuse they receive is because no one else will take the position. If they do not do it their kid and others will not get to enjoy the games.
These are volunteers who freely give many hours of their precious time. Two or three practices a week, calling to find out why little Johnny has not been to practice for a while, phoning parents to remind them it is their turn to provide refreshments, calling multiple times to see why Joey has not brought his money for his new uniform.
Today coach's must be constantly on the lookout for being physically attacked and harmed. Verbal abuse if just part of the game anymore and has to be put up with, although some places are putting limits on it now. It seems yelling insults at a coach and critism of how a league or game is run, is a right we have been endowed with by our creator.
I was seeing her post from the perspective of a volunteer who puts up with more abuse than they should ever have to.
Ok. These are legitimate concerns, and I have seen irrational parents as well. In fact I can attest, many parfents are down right ridiculous!
And then you said this:
quote:
I over reacted to excathedra's post and I am sorry. I agree it was not spelled out in the rules so she had a right to question the league.
And I agree to this wholeheartedly as well. And so, now that all of this is on the table, as that Famous American "Motorist" Rodney King once said; "Can't we all just get along?"
Really, I am sure that Excathedra is savvy enough to know that parents can get out of hand, and now I hope that she saw in your post that you said that;
quote:
and I am sorry.
And ya know, a thread concering that terrible killing in the Little Leagues might warrant a thread of it's own. So terribly sad! Breaks my heart... :(-->
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hiway29
No, I'm not saying that, Shellon.
I don't have kids. I know nothing about raising kids. I'm just waxing nostalgic on what is was like for me to be a kid.
But since you brought it up-why WERE you going on the court ? You've got very intelligent daughters.
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sharon
the world is not a very nice place at times, and i never realized that until i had kids,
i to miss the days when the neighborhood kids hung out till dark, and then went home cause ur friends mother told u to.
because of the way the world is, parents work very hard(in my area) to find places for the kids to interact w/other kids, so try-outs r now a thing of the past, i don't know if that's good or bad, but it is.
i fought the trend for as long as i could but most children in the ny/nj metro area by the time they are 2 are involved in structured activities.
and then parental quilt kicks in and man that kick is the worst.
so i choose my arguments with my kids, no tv in there rooms (i know bad mommy bad) no computer w/o mom or dad in room, and yea i read my 10 year olds e-mail, not because i don't trust him, but because i don't trust to many other people.
sad isin't it
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Shellon
LOL hiway, bless yer gizzard.
I wasn't throwing nuttin atcha, I was just making some kind of point.
I was going out there because when he'd give the girls their instructions, I'd need to know:
that my kid knew what to he meant
did she need me
did she want me to show her what he meant
Should I sweep the floor ahead of her
GUFFAW, I don't know. I had no business going out there, it embarassed my kid and intruded on the coach's job.
My daughters are indeed very intelligent, but I have this thing called "mama will always be there to be sure everything is ok and even if I get in the way I don't care cuz it's my job"
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simonzelotes
I think there's always going to be a somewhat different approach to youth sports between men and women,and I think that's a good thing,really...I'll be sitting with the dads,and you'll hear all the moms a-hootin' and a-hollerin' cuz' their little Johnnie made it to first base when the catcher dropped strike three,and the dad's all p.o.ed because little Johnnie didn't swing the bat like he's been trying to teach him all this time...
I remember a young man,about 10,standing at home plate,in his stance,bat cocked and ready to swing and suddenly started peeing his pants,wetting the batter's box...We all tried to act nonchalant,but everybody knew what happened...I've wondered if that kid is going to grow up one day and be a great motivational speaker,addressing his audience: "Hey,what are you afraid of?..What could possibly embarrass you more than I was that day at the batter's box?"...
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excathedra
will write more later, i just wanted to thank you all so much for helping me out
you're very wise (not just you simon, you egomaniac)
love, ex
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sharon
when my david was 5 he was asked to move up from training to t-ball he was thrilled, me i had already cleared a room for his tropheys, later i found out that the 6 year old team would close w/o my kid, fair enough, so he played w/ 7-8 yr olds (ok glorified water boy but happy)he road the bench the whole season..but happy, we were in first pl. championship nailed, so i figured would it hurt for my kid to play 1 inning? (of course rules of little league are rough every child must play 3 innings a game, i never said anything dave was happy) so i walked over to the coach and in my nicest mommy voice asked if perhaps my son who saved their team could get 1 inning in...
"NO, you see this is an important game and yudda yudda yudda." I attempted to explain to this man that statistically speaking we had clintched the championship 3 games ago...
and yea I became a Mother quoted little league rules and insited he be played. He had done his bit for the team, and this is supposed to be fun right?
yes david played..i would love to say he went up and hit a homerun..no struck-out. the outfield wasn't much better, but he played
the next year Jemma Brokers took the championship, and it looks like it could be a repeat
i sure hope so but we'll see and even if we don't come June there will be 14 screaming 10-11yr old boys jumping in the pool, eating to much and me standing on the side smiling
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Pirate1974
Before the age of 10 or 11, kid sports should be about learning the game, everybody getting to play and having fun. By the time a kid reaches middle school age, the ones that are really interested still want to play and those who aren't have probably dropped out. There's plenty of time then for tryouts and cuts and only the best players getting to play.
The league I was part of, which was associated with Babe Ruth baseball, the 5 & 6-year olds played t-ball, the 7 & 8 year olds played "machine pitch" (no pitcher but a pitching machine throws the ball) and at 9 they started having live pitching. I thought that was a great way to introduce kids to the game.
When I was coaching at the 9-10 year old level, I used to rotate players from the infield to the outfield every inning. If you played shortstop one inning, you might play right field the next, then back to shortstop. The kids loved it because at that level, the ball reached the outfield about twice a game and kids got bored standing out there. I had parents complain about that because they thought their kids were getting shortchanged by not learning one position and it hurt our chances to win games. One mother called me at home to tell me her son only wanted to play second base the whole game and asked me not to move him. Ridiculous. We weren't exactly the Boston Red Sox so what difference did it make?
That's one reason I quit coaching baseball. I never seemed to have those problems in basketball for some reason.
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WhiteDove
Hey Excathedra Can I have the concession stand rights? Please Please.... I promise not to throw food unless that mean ole pig Psalmie comes around.
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WhiteDove
Oh I forgot some words of wisdom to guide you from the sign on my attorneys office.
Ah Hell.... Sue the bast*rds
( then buy the team and fire the coach or better yet keep him on as a waterboy.)
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WhiteDove
Ha I hope not if you have a second base you are playing some weird basketball.
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J0nny Ling0
Z-Shot
I must say that your rudeness to Excathedra was totally uncalled for! I only read the first page, but did you apologize to her? You really should. Frustrations and "politics" in kid sports are very real and hurtful to the kids, and her concern for her son is not about "a mommy being over protective". To slam her with "oh you should be thankful that your kid is not dead, at least he gets to play" is totally unconscionable. Why bring something that heavy into this? ExCath is simply a Mom who loves her son, ok? So, quit bein that way...
Now, Excathedra. Thanks for bringing this up. We have moved to the "big city" of Juneau, and my two boys, aged nine and 12, just went to their first Little League practices yesterday. We had seen lots of screwy things with coaches and kids not being allowed to play because of this "parental political thing" (read: The son of the school principal gets to play more even though his kid sucks at baseball) and all of that.
I have been working forty plus hours a week doing heavy construction, and haven't really focused on the up and coming Little League season, and your thread here has jogged my memory on Little League things. And if I may echo some of the other kindly advice to you already posted, I am sure that things will work out. And, if a boy has a really good arm, it will get noticed anyway. And geez, short stop? That's a killer position to play! Lots and lots of action there to be sure! Have a great season!
Jonny Lingo
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excathedra
oh thank you jonny. i appreciate it very much. i don't think Z's comparison was realistic regarding what advice i was trying to get, but hey....
anyway, things are fine. my kid is happy and outside playing basketball at the moment. he made the pee wee hockey team he wanted to make last night. he can't wait for his next baseball game. and on and on.
i think i was so upset because no one told me the rule and he was crying and just wanted a chance to pitch now and then. and when i called the person to ask about it, he was rude and crude and just plain mean.
so that made me all the more sad and frustrated, not to mention how guilty i felt for signing him up late and causing the whole thing.
i know life is full of lessons, but sometimes you don't want the lesson to be your fault as a parent. but maybe that's a lesson too. stupid parents (me) are not perfect.
after talking to the mayor (who managed little league for YEARS) and talking to you all, and then my brothers and brothers-in-law this weekend (they are coaches and little league vets, etc.), i'm okay, and so is my darling boy
thank you for your kind advice and perspective, all of you. being a mother is hard for me at times. i want to CONTROL his happiness
;)-->.
but this arrogant rude condescending head of the league could have helped me A LOT just by talking to me and explaining how things evolve. but he told me i couldn't understand that 10 years old means "serious ball." and of course i had no right to question "the board."
(i had no preconceived ideas about him until he went nuts on me, with his power, or whatever you call it.)
thank you again. you guys are the greatest.
if i don't watch out for his kid, who will ?
;)-->
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Stayed Too Long
For cryin' out loud....give the coach and the league a break. Let them do what they are there to do: teach the kids a few things about throwing and hitting a stupid ball. The sun will rise tomorrow morning.
The best thing your son can take away from this is to learn not to be late. Instead he probably has learned to see himself as a victim.
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excathedra
why don't you shut the **** up ? he has not learned anything about being a victim. you don't think he KNOWS it's because he was singed up late by ME ???? guess what it didn't matter before this year
**** you twice
guess what ? the rules last year were different than this year ?
and they say NOTHING about late sign-ups in the community, on the web site, or over at the field. in fact, they ADVERTISE it's never too late to sign up. i didn't even know what a draft was (neither did he) until this year
again, SCREW YOU
ps. i said NOTHING to the coach or to ANYONE, NOTHING. i called the head of the league to just ask about the "new" rule. and it went downhill from there, by HIS mouth and attitude, not mine.
so shut up
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excathedra
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J0nny Ling0
Geez STL,
Cantcha read through the lines just a little bit? Cantcha see that Excath has learned a thing or two, but also that she is just a Mom who loves her son?
Can't you even read? She said and I quote;
Now come on, what the hell is the matter with being a little bit sensitive to a persons heart for cryin out loud? What do you think this is, a personal shooting gallery provided for you to take aim at every single person's possible mistakes so you can drill 'em straight through the heart?
She said she had made a mistake by signing him up late, she said that it was a lesson learned. But maybe being honest here is too damned dangerous because someone like you might jump all them.
Excath, maybe you shouldn't be so honest, for if you are, someone may see it as a target for them to stomp on, and your heart is more precious than that....
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J0nny Ling0
Well now you've pi$$ed her off and I don't blame her one bit.
ExCath, f**k him. Fuggedaboudit. He ain't worth your ire, although he deserves it...
You are a fine Mom, and I know it because of the things you said. And if you are who I think you are, the sister of one of my wife's best friends in the Corps, then I know you come form good stock, and it's no wonder you are the fine person I have come to know here...
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WhiteDove
Hey stayed to long Since when is questioning the rules a federal offence? I would have done the same thing especially since the rules it sounds like are not even rules yet. What is wrong with going to bat(no Pun intended) for your kid's.
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sharon
My team lost 16-0 today
Took whole team for pizza and ice cream only 2 threw up...we had a friggin blast, i'm starting to think i'll buy a league, Whitedove runs concession, Exca u get to be ump, little kids score, rude people get bounced and after the game
on me!
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excathedra
DAMN it. letting the kids play is what i THOUGHT it was about
but the longer i live, and the more i see, politics and bull.... is what i need to learn
that goes for all sports
and you know i think most men live vicariously through their children. that's why i think my objective questioning was worth a piece of ****
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Stayed Too Long
As I was preparing my post excathedra made an additional post at 17:00, which I had not yet read. My post was at 17:10.
As the then husband of a former league official and coach, my ex wife was constantly being called by parents who did not like the way she played their child. At games it was a pain just to show up because she would get jumped for not handling this play right, or why didn't she do this instead of that. Believe me there is very little joy from a coach's perspective in children's sports. The reason many do put themselves through the torture and abuse they receive is because no one else will take the position. If they do not do it their kid and others will not get to enjoy the games.
These are volunteers who freely give many hours of their precious time. Two or three practices a week, calling to find out why little Johnny has not been to practice for a while, phoning parents to remind them it is their turn to provide refreshments, calling multiple times to see why Joey has not brought his money for his new uniform.
Today coach's must be constantly on the lookout for being physically attacked and harmed. Verbal abuse if just part of the game anymore and has to be put up with, although some places are putting limits on it now. It seems yelling insults at a coach and critism of how a league or game is run, is a right we have been endowed with by our creator.
I was seeing her post from the perspective of a volunteer who puts up with more abuse than they should ever have to.
I over reacted to excathedra's post and I am sorry. I agree it was not spelled out in the rules so she had a right to question the league.
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J0nny Ling0
STL:
You said this, and I have to agree with it:
Ok. These are legitimate concerns, and I have seen irrational parents as well. In fact I can attest, many parfents are down right ridiculous!
And then you said this:
And I agree to this wholeheartedly as well. And so, now that all of this is on the table, as that Famous American "Motorist" Rodney King once said; "Can't we all just get along?"
Really, I am sure that Excathedra is savvy enough to know that parents can get out of hand, and now I hope that she saw in your post that you said that;
And ya know, a thread concering that terrible killing in the Little Leagues might warrant a thread of it's own. So terribly sad! Breaks my heart...
:(-->
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excathedra
i am sorry, stayed too long, for cursing and telling you to shut up. i reacted to your post.
the only thing i did was leave a message at the little league phone number asking the president or vice president to call me back.
not only was the rule not stated anywhere, the board member(s) when i signed up mentioned NOTHING even when i asked.
i never yelled at a coach, i never yelled at the jerk who called me back. i hung up on him when he continued to talk down to me.
enough anyway. i understand more about coaching and volunteers than you realize, but then again you don't me.
i'm sorry i was so rude to you. i took your post to be rude also.
peace
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GeorgeStGeorge
I guess we take our victories where we can!
:D--> 
:D--> 
:D-->
George
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