WhiteDove Posted April 4, 2005 Share Posted April 4, 2005 I got this today and did not want to detract from Kit's thread but it's too good not to pass on. Another Living Will. I, _________________________ (fill in the blank), being of sound mind and body, DO NOT wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of peckerhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to sit up and ask for a rum & coke, it should be presumed that I won't do so ever again. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my spouse,family,children,dog, and/or attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day. Under no circumstances shall the members of the Legislature enact a special law to keep me on life-support machinery. It is my wish that these p*ck*rhe*ds mind their own damn business, and pay attention instead to the health, education and future of the millions of Americans who AREN'T in a permanent coma and who nonetheless may be in need of nourishment. Under no circumstances shall any politicians butt into this case. I don't care how many votes they're trying to scrounge for their run for the presidency . It is my wish that they play politics with someone else's life and leave me alone to die in peace. I couldn't care less if a hundred religious zealots send e-mails to legislators in which they pretend to care about me. I don't know these people, and I certainly haven't authorized them to preach and/or crusade on my behalf. They should mind their own damn business, too. If any of my family goes against my wishes and turns my case into a political cause, I hereby promise to come back from the grave and make his or her existence a living hell. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
George Aar Posted April 4, 2005 Share Posted April 4, 2005 I'll sign that one... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellon Posted April 4, 2005 Share Posted April 4, 2005 HA! Minus the rum and coke, this is almost exactly what my mother's paper work says. Especially the come back and mess up our lives if we don't do as she asks. Dig this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmiller Posted April 4, 2005 Share Posted April 4, 2005 :D--> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
George Aar Posted April 4, 2005 Share Posted April 4, 2005 Oh, I missed that part. Can I substitute a "double Bloody Mary"? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteDove Posted April 4, 2005 Author Share Posted April 4, 2005 Yes Geo but there will be a small service charge of $25.00 for any changes.... :D--> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmiller Posted April 4, 2005 Share Posted April 4, 2005 printing out WhiteDove's version of a living will -- click of the mouse. price of white-out to get rid of rum & coke, and insert double Bloody Mary -- $2.50 a living will I can live with -- priceless!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ham Posted April 4, 2005 Share Posted April 4, 2005 I'm thinking of writing something like that up, but leave a clause in it for my kids to save some money, "just prop me up in the woods somewhere, I'll be alright..." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
herbiejuan Posted April 5, 2005 Share Posted April 5, 2005 Dove where do I sign? I think it's a sad state of affairs when the President of the US gets involved with a persons choice... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarthP2000 Posted April 5, 2005 Share Posted April 5, 2005 Dove, Beautiful, just beautiful. :)--> And I love the title of the thread. Perfect for dealing with any intrusive relative and/or in-law, sanctamonious and self-righteous religious leader, and scum-sucking politician. I wonder if the Schindler family can use a few copies for possible future use, hmmm? ;)--> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Belle Posted April 5, 2005 Share Posted April 5, 2005 I'm going to add "prop me up beside the jukebox when I die" to it....it IS priceless! :D--> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WhiteDove Posted April 6, 2005 Author Share Posted April 6, 2005 David I saw that! you owe $25.00 too. Make your check to Captain Morgan's Parrot Bay Charity and send it to me I'll make sure it gets there. Belle what a great idea I should have thought of that. Hey I think I hear a Blood Sweat & Tears song...... And when I die, and when I'm gone there'll be, one child born in this world to carry on, to carry on Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmiller Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 quote: David I saw that! you owe $25.00 too. Make your check to Captain Morgan's Parrot Bay Charity and send it to me I'll make sure it gets there. Yup. I bet you will!! (Now I know why you're flying high!) :D--> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmiller Posted April 6, 2005 Share Posted April 6, 2005 quote: Well I ain't afraid of die'n,It's the thought of being deadI wanna go on being me once my eulogys been read Don't spread my ashes out to sea, don't lay me down to rest You can put my mind to ease if you fill my last request Prop me up beside the jukebox when I die Lord I wanna go to heaven but I don't wanna go tonight Fill my boots up with sand, put a stiff drink in my hand prop me up beside the jukebox when I die Just make your next selection and while your still iin line You can pay you last respects one quarter at a time Prop me up beside the jukebox when I die Lord I wanna go to heaven but I don't wanna go tonight fill my boots up with sand put a stiff drink in my hand prop me up beside the jukebox when I die Oh prop me up beside the jukebox when I die Would Joe Diffey's fans be called Diffey-cult?? --> :D--> --> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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George Aar
I'll sign that one...
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Shellon
HA! Minus the rum and coke, this is almost exactly what my mother's paper work says.
Especially the come back and mess up our lives if we don't do as she asks.
Dig this.
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dmiller
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George Aar
Oh, I missed that part. Can I substitute a "double Bloody Mary"?
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WhiteDove
Yes Geo but there will be a small service charge of $25.00 for any changes....
:D-->
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dmiller
printing out WhiteDove's version of a living will -- click of the mouse.
price of white-out to get rid of rum & coke, and insert double Bloody Mary -- $2.50
a living will I can live with -- priceless!!
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Ham
I'm thinking of writing something like that up, but leave a clause in it for my kids to save some money, "just prop me up in the woods somewhere, I'll be alright..."
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herbiejuan
Dove where do I sign?
I think it's a sad state of affairs when the President of the US gets involved with a persons
choice...
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GarthP2000
Dove,
Beautiful, just beautiful.
:)--> And I love the title of the thread.
Perfect for dealing with any intrusive relative and/or in-law, sanctamonious and self-righteous religious leader, and scum-sucking politician.
I wonder if the Schindler family can use a few copies for possible future use, hmmm?
;)-->
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Belle
I'm going to add "prop me up beside the jukebox when I die" to it....it IS priceless!
:D-->
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WhiteDove
David I saw that! you owe $25.00 too. Make your check to Captain Morgan's Parrot Bay Charity and send it to me I'll make sure it gets there.
Belle what a great idea I should have thought of that. Hey I think I hear a Blood Sweat & Tears song......
And when I die, and when I'm gone
there'll be, one child born
in this world
to carry on, to carry on
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dmiller
Yup. I bet you will!!
(Now I know why you're flying high!)
:D-->
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dmiller
Would Joe Diffey's fans be called Diffey-cult??
--> 
:D--> 
-->
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