I don't want PFAL

[Ham]

For the thousandth time, speaking politely, "I do not want more PFAL".

The number of documentable times I sat through that class- at least 45. No friggin kidding. Add to that the HOURS of study time. No more. I've had enough. The likelihood of sitting through it again rates with the likelihood of it raining gold bullion on a clear day. No thanks, I have had enough.

Same goes for WAP, or any of the other "reincarnations".

But if you're still not convinced: I wrote a little poem..

Won't you take this class with me?

No, not even if its free.

Would you take it in a car?

I'd rather drive to the next bar.

Would you take it in a boat?

Not in a boat, or in a mote.

You could take it from afar..

I'd rather dip myself in tar.

Why oh why, do you hate me so?

I don't hate, I just won't go.

We could run it in a park..

I'd rather eat some fresh pine bark.

We could do it in the kitchen-

I'd probably start really itchin.

Why not in a comfy chair?

I'd just as soon pull out my hair.

We could have it in the attic-

Not unless I turn real spastic.

Don't you know it's made of gold?

You can have it, it's way too old.

We could hear it over dinner-

no, it would make me really thinner.

Why not when we're raking leaves?

I do not want to further heave.

Why not listen down a well?

I'd think I'd died and gone to hell.

Would you, would you, in a church

I'd gladly leave you in the lurch.

Why oh why are you so mean?

I'd rather paint my body green.

Why not listen in a bus?

The driver would get rid of us.

Listen to it when you jog?

I'd beat the walkman with a log.

We could listen hanging loose

I'd prefer to get bit by a moose

Why not in the open air?

I'd rather wrestle with a bear.

Won't you ever take this thing?

Only if the cows would just sprout wings.

[oldiesman]

Mr. Hammeroni, 45 times?

Ya sure got your moneys worth!

I wish each PFAL segment was on the net -- That way we may scrutinize and debate more accurately. :)-->

[rascal]

Debate and scrutinizing my next bm would hold more appeal.....

I think I must have sat through it around 25 times....augh, I kept thinkin maybe THIS time I will understand the *greatness* everyone raves about.....

[outandabout]

That was a great poem!

What was that song?

PFAL..... There's something just for youuuuuuuuu

It something something and how to walk right throoooooooough.

(sung to this really mundane lifeless "melody")

arrgh!

[Ham]

Forty-five times. At least. I figured this number from the fifteen years that I was REALLY gung ho. We ran a MINIMUM of three classes a year. I was in every one of them. I usually ran the tapes. To this day, I can quote even every stinking joke. It's pathetic.. somehow, I am now supposed to "master" PFAL. No thanks. No more- I'm done with it..

Not really ranting, I'm laughing my rear end off as I write this.. just one of my "interesting" mornings.

But really.. after all that, if I have to somehow work it for "da hidden meaning" to somehow become more spurtual, somethings wrong.

Already done that. No more- I'm done with it..

[hiway29]

I lost count after 35 times or so. I know I hit in the neighborhood of 45 times.

But, as they kept telling us-everytime you take it it gets BETTER.

I ran 2 classes, worked charts on a few, ran tapes on a few, and was a 'supporting grad' on more than I can count.

I'm with Hammeroni. I'm done. finit.kaput.

At least I haven't cracked up yet-in the automobile.

[Ham]

"At least I haven't cracked up yet-in the automobile."

Heh heh heh.. thank "da Mog" for that, heh heh.

[Ham]

Good grief.. if I included the ones I sat through in "the lean" years, it would go over sixty.

[WhiteDove]

quote:

Originally posted by Mr. Hammeroni

Won't you ever take this thing?

Only if the cows would just sprout wings.

[Ham]

OMG, it's killing me, heh heh.

[Ham]

Whoever is the break guy, please, please poison the cookies..

[Ham]

I will show up on corpse time, ten minutes to seven. I'll make sure I bring my log to "fix" the AV equipment with..

[Ham]

Now all that's gotta happen is for it to rain gold bullion on a clear day. Then you've got me!

[GrouchoMarxJr]

I hear ya Hammer...

I would rather crawl naked over broken glass for 5 miles with someone shooting rock salt into my foot every 50 feet...before I would ever subject myself to the hideous torture of PFAL.

[Ham]

Heh heh heh. Hello Uncle H, I was wondering when you were going to weigh in on this one! Come to think of it, that's about how the rear end felt after sitting on those hard as rock metal chairs for three weeks. I think the only reason they used them was because it kept you in enough pain that you couldn't fall asleep. Even that didn't work at times..

I am waiting.. still haven't seen gold bullion flopping around on the ground.. would have said "rained fish" but one of you jokers would have found something like that on the net some where.

[Raf]

quote:

Originally posted by UncleHairy:

I hear ya Hammer...

I would rather crawl naked over broken glass for 5 miles with someone shooting rock salt into my foot every 50 feet...before I would ever subject myself to the hideous torture of PFAL.

Umm, you do that. I'll take the class again.

[justloafing]

quote:

Originally posted by Raf:

Originally posted by UncleHairy:

I hear ya Hammer...

I would rather crawl naked over broken glass for 5 miles with someone shooting rock salt into my foot every 50 feet...before I would ever subject myself to the hideous torture of PFAL.

I will "see" you and "raise" you Loser has to sit through it again. I hate pain but not that much. :)-->

[TOMMYZ]

Mr. Hammeroni,

Would you take it on the train ?

Would you take it in the rain ?

Would you take it in a box ?

Would you take it with a fox ?

[Ham]

Noooooooooooooooooooooo... heh heh.

[Ham]

No, I wouldn't take it in a box.

Nor would I take it with da Fox.

I took it 59 times too many,

I did not even make a penny.

[TOMMYZ]

That's all I could remember. My kids are now 15 and 17 and "Green Eggs And Ham" is packed away in a box in the attic.

[GrouchoMarxJr]

I would not take it with a duck

I would not take it for a buck

I would not listen for three weeks

I would not listen to those geeks

I would not bring the coffee pot

I would not pray for the bot

I will not speak in tongues for you

I will not lie and say it's true

I will not flip the charts tonight

I will not sit and say it's right

I will not string a lousy chair

my reason is that I don't care

pfal is just a scam

I'd rather eat green eggs and ham.

[dmiller]

Sung to the tune of "Old MacDonald ---

Ole Doc Wierwille had a farm

e-i-e-i-oh

and on this farm he ran a class

e-i-e-i-oh

Foundational here

Intermediate there

Advanced, Advanced, Advanced, Advanced!

Ole Doc Wiewille ran a class

e-i-e-i-oh

On this farm he had some twigs

e-i-e-i-oh

Fed em slop, just like pigs

e-i-e-i-oh

All they heard was

I'ts The Word!

I'm telling you, just like I heard

God taught me, and I'll teach you

e-i-e-i-oh

On this farm he had some corp

e-i-e-i-oh

They gave their all, he wanted more

e-i-e-i-oh

from early dawn to late midnight

they had to work to "get it right"

slaves a'toiling no end in sight

e-i-e-i-oh

A motorcoach was on the farm

e-i-e-i-oh

at first no one saw any harm

e-i-e-i-oh

some went in, then more and more

soon all knew what that coach was for

because of it's *revolving* door

e-i-e-i-oh

There was a class PFAL

e-i-e-i-oh

"showed" the way to Heavan from Hell

e-i-e-i-oh

Guarenteed to open eyes

But that whole class was plagiarized

Ole Doc Wierwille conned us all

e-i-e-i-oh.

[Jim]

Hammer, Dm and Uncle,

I'd take it again if I could sit in the back of the class with you guys and a bottle of Southern Comfort...

Fire Engine Red indeed...

[ex10]

ohmigosh you guys.... :)-->

Seeing as how it's been about what? um 40 plus years, since pfal was filmed, maybe it's time to get over it????

just a suggestion....