Well said, Oakspear. If I'm remembering correctly, on WayDale you couldn't even post on a "My Story" (whatever it was called there--I don't remember) thread because extwi didn't want it to become an open door for trashing the person who poured his/her personal thoughts out for all to see.
Putting your life in word form is challanging enough. Having to put it in a public forum is stressful and makes you valnerable.
YOUR STORY forum is one of thr most theraputic tools in prosessing. It like a support group. You speak your truth and avail yourself to the folks that have had the same experiance. It is cathartic and healing. It is a place to embrace one anothers journey, not to be the critic of it.
Agreed. Also, please don't try to evangelize them and try to get them into your apple-that- didn't-fall-far-from-the-tree splinter groups just because they bared their soul and shared some very tough times they were having in their lives. It's not that easy to do and for gosh sake, if you are in one of those things, please go after fresh fodder, not us. Definition of insanity: To keep doing the same thing over and over again and expect different results.
Thank you for your well-reasoned, compassionate and honest post, and thank you for starting this topic. Thank you also for your reply to my topic. We sat at the same table at Steve & Cindy’s wedding, and I recall you as an intelligent man, a Gentleman, in the truest definition of the term, who was a lot of fun to be with.
I know exactly what you mean when you said you felt “naked” when you clicked on the “post” button. In preparing my story for posting, I consulted with Steve & Cindy to try to judge what the response might be. I agonized over it for a fair amount of time, because, after reading “The Cult that Snapped,” I posted essentially the same “coming out” story on WayDale, and caught a fair amount of hell over it. So I just wasn’t sure how to, when, using what words, or even if.
Steve & Cindy suggested that I proceed. They noted that any negative responses would most likely be addressed by others – intervention on my part would probably be unnecessary. And they were so right!!! Grease Spot Caf?s everything that WayDale should have been, and GSC did it many generations better. And meeting you and all the others at the wedding, for me, was a little glimpse of what the Gathering ought to be.
Like you, I bared my soul in that posting. There were negative comments from some, but hey, they are entitled to their opinions. I have no argument with that. What I appreciated most was the love, the compassion, the understanding, and the downright human honesty that made up the vast majority of the replies. Everyone, (well, mostly,) made me feel right at home.
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Shellon
Thank you
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ex10
Well said, Oak.
I always have trouble with those who feel like they have to "parent" or "correct" other ADULTS.
-->
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excathedra
i agree there should be no "judging" a person's story....
i hope i haven't done that.
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Oakspear
thank you Shell!
ex10: yeah, we got out of a cult, I thought
exC: No, you've been a good girl
:D-->
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Linda Z
Well said, Oakspear. If I'm remembering correctly, on WayDale you couldn't even post on a "My Story" (whatever it was called there--I don't remember) thread because extwi didn't want it to become an open door for trashing the person who poured his/her personal thoughts out for all to see.
Anyone else remember that?
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ex10
Yes, Linda, I remember. It does seem like GS is a kinder, gentler place, despite the usual bickering.
;)-->
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imbus
Putting your life in word form is challanging enough. Having to put it in a public forum is stressful and makes you valnerable.
YOUR STORY forum is one of thr most theraputic tools in prosessing. It like a support group. You speak your truth and avail yourself to the folks that have had the same experiance. It is cathartic and healing. It is a place to embrace one anothers journey, not to be the critic of it.
Well said OAK.
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vickles
Thanks oak for sharing your words of advice!!!!
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waterbuffalo
Agreed. Also, please don't try to evangelize them and try to get them into your apple-that- didn't-fall-far-from-the-tree splinter groups just because they bared their soul and shared some very tough times they were having in their lives. It's not that easy to do and for gosh sake, if you are in one of those things, please go after fresh fodder, not us. Definition of insanity: To keep doing the same thing over and over again and expect different results.
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Trefor Heywood
When somdebody shares their story that is exactly what it is.
It should be treated with respect just as an MPs maiden speech to Parliament is.
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ExWayDaryl
Oakspear,
Thank you for your well-reasoned, compassionate and honest post, and thank you for starting this topic. Thank you also for your reply to my topic. We sat at the same table at Steve & Cindy’s wedding, and I recall you as an intelligent man, a Gentleman, in the truest definition of the term, who was a lot of fun to be with.
I know exactly what you mean when you said you felt “naked” when you clicked on the “post” button. In preparing my story for posting, I consulted with Steve & Cindy to try to judge what the response might be. I agonized over it for a fair amount of time, because, after reading “The Cult that Snapped,” I posted essentially the same “coming out” story on WayDale, and caught a fair amount of hell over it. So I just wasn’t sure how to, when, using what words, or even if.
Steve & Cindy suggested that I proceed. They noted that any negative responses would most likely be addressed by others – intervention on my part would probably be unnecessary. And they were so right!!! Grease Spot Caf?s everything that WayDale should have been, and GSC did it many generations better. And meeting you and all the others at the wedding, for me, was a little glimpse of what the Gathering ought to be.
Like you, I bared my soul in that posting. There were negative comments from some, but hey, they are entitled to their opinions. I have no argument with that. What I appreciated most was the love, the compassion, the understanding, and the downright human honesty that made up the vast majority of the replies. Everyone, (well, mostly,) made me feel right at home.
As Shellon said, you are “The Voice of Reason”.
Daryl J. Lamkey (aka ExWayDaryl)
Lives with his cat in Franklin Park, Illinois
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Oakspear
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