There is enough blame to spread around to make everyone a little uncomfortable.
Case workers with unmanageable case loads.
Foster parents who can make large money tax free.
But what about a culture that pays anyone biologically able to bear children?
A culture that condones and encourages single women to have and rear children?
A culture that allows a parent or parents to not parent.
Broken children are often very hard to fix. Abused and neglected kids are raised to have a very different idea of "normal." The norms established in the earliest and most impressionable months and years of life seem to become a refuge when everything else in their lives -- home, parents, family, school, friends -- changes and changes again.
Many foster parents are saints. Most begin with high ideals and standards. But to undo the effects of early abuse and neglect seems often to take superhuman ability and patience. Residential treatment is often the dark hole of child welfare.
So there is enough blame to go around. And there is hope. From the perspective of one involved in the system, there is no substitue for the commitment, faith and love of the foster home. The system is limited by many factors; none more important than the caregivers it can recruit and retain.
Do not think there is an easy or quick fix for the problems that we as a society have brought upon ourselves. There is Hell to pay.
Yes we know that it is not our fault, though it is difficult to avoid thinking ‘What if’s.
Mrimagine-
“Case workers with unmanageable case loads.â€
Honesty would help. So long as they agree to lie to every parent, they can not possibly work together with those same parents as a team. If you KNOW that X and Y and Z, have happened to a child and he is likely to need A and B services and he has tendencies toward acting out in W manner; TELL the foster parents. It is not a poor reflection on the state if a child honestly has been through the wringer, or if the child does some thing. So lying to the foster parents is not going to save-face of the case-worker.
Why can’t they simply be honest? They feel that no sane adult would willingly knowingly take-on such a child if they only knew what the child has been diagnosed with.
Talking with other foster parents, many of us would willingly take these children, if you knew before hand what we were getting.
It does seem that more often than not, are at odds with the case-workers.
“Foster parents who can make large money tax free.â€
I have heard of these. In the news.
Say you get $400/month for each child, and you have 3 children. Yes that additional $1200 is now in your pocket. But you had a job before getting a license and had to prove that you could support yourself without the foster-children. $1200/month is not getting anyone rich. We supplied bunk-beds which were destroyed within a year. DESTROYED, out of four bunkbeds, two had been punched through, the supports underneath that hold up the mattress were broken such that the mattresses fell through. A third bunkbed’s frame collapsed, the bolts that go through and hold-on to the headboard and footboard had given loose. The bolt heads had popped plumb off.
Over the course of 2 ½ years we have had 2 different computers for the children to use. After all EVERYONE agrees that in this day and age children need to be computer aware. But the power cord gets cut, the speaker cords get chewed apart, peanut butter gets jammed into the CD drive, these kids will closed-fist pound the keyboards.
Electric blankets have the wires pulled out and chewed. We re-paint the children’s rooms every year, why? Because the pine-sol only removes so much of the feces and urine that have been smeared across those walls.
Raising foster children is a high-cost lifestyle. Unless you keep them in a hand-dug pit in your backyard and feed them rice and beans with a funnel; it is going to cost you considerably more to raise a foster-child. Bio-children are attached to you, they are attached to belongings, they do not destroy things just to amuse themselves that way a RAD, or EID, or ODD child will.
“But what about a culture that pays anyone biologically able to bear children?â€
Especially in the cases where each previous child has been removed for abuse or neglect.
“A culture that condones and encourages single women to have and rear children?â€
There is no way that I am going to touch this one. Each time in the past that I have commented on this topic my head has been bitten off and handed back to me. To me it is fairly obvious the logical consequences, but . . . .
“Many foster parents are saints. Most begin with high ideals and standards. But to undo the effects of early abuse and neglect seems often to take superhuman ability and patience. Residential treatment is often the dark hole of child welfare.â€
You and your wife are rare humans.....keep following your hearts.
That said, mzimagine has plenty of experience with families, children and children born with severe health issues. Please do not dismiss her insight so quickly. She knows whereof she speaks.
I totally understand where you are coming from. You have had a nasty experience.
As I've shared before I did foster care for many years. Some social workers were really good and then the others were not. I had good experiences and bad. I've also been investigated. So I know what its like. It is pretty scary.
In all the bad though the good outweighs it all. A few years ago I got a phone call from a young lady that I had in my home in foster care. She called to thank me for saving her life, for the love that I gave her.
To get a phone call like that really did something to me. For that one phone call the years were made positive for me.
I adopted a foster child myself. He does have his problems but, he bondeded with me and very much part of the family. I can't imagine not having him around. He is so outgoing and has the personality that people are attracted to. He is quite loveable.
So, what I'm trying to say is that even though you had a bad experience don't lump it all bad because of it. There are kids out there that do desparately need parents that will love them and they can love back.
True, there are ones that will never bond.
I learned by experience to listen to the catch words the social workers would use before excepting kids. You can pretty well tell what their problems are if you know those words and are listening to them. And most of the time if you know those words to watch for you can ask a lot of questions to see if there is something they aren't saying.
Again, Galen, I'm sorry that this is happening to you and your wife. It is very devestating to you and the kids.
I will keep both bonnie and you in my prayers for sure!!!!
Another thing is that there is money to be made to be made in foster care. I made 1200 dollars a month per kid and would sometimes have three kids. I've heard that they pay 1500 now. I don't think its a bad thing, Foster parents do a lot of work. Its the foster parents that just do it for the money that is the problem.
"Bio-children are attached to you, they are attached to belongings, they do not destroy things just to amuse themselves that way a RAD, or EID, or ODD child will."
Wanna bet? Yesterday my seven year old spent about five minutes deliberately and intentionally smashing toys to pieces downstairs. I knew he was gonna do it, heard him planning it. I let him, briefly, so he could receive the natural consequence, which is to pay for those toys out of his allowance. I figured if I stopped him before hand all he would learn was to be more sneaky about it.
No offense intended, Galen. I could not do what you do. I don't have the patience or the energy. But trust me, bio children who have special needs can be equally destructive.
So I guess what I am saying is - I do it because I love my child to pieces regardless of his difficulties. However, I could not and would not willing take on a child who wasn't mine, who had these issues. I admire anyone who can and will.
"That said, mzimagine has plenty of experience with families, children and children born with severe health issues."
YEs, it does appear as such.
". . .Please do not dismiss her insight so quickly. She knows whereof she speaks."
I re-read my post.
The only part of Mrimagine's post tht I did not concur with was:
"A culture that condones and encourages single women to have and rear children?"
And I stated at the time that I did not 'openly' concur as such would get me roasted later. I have voiced such previously here on GS, and each time it upset many.
I honestly did not think that I dismissed any part of the post.
"Another thing is that there is money to be made to be made in foster care. I made 1200 dollars a month per kid and would sometimes have three kids. I've heard that they pay 1500 now. I don't think its a bad thing, Foster parents do a lot of work. Its the foster parents that just do it for the money that is the problem."
I agree that anyone who does it for the money is a problem.
I have been told that CT pays the highest level of child-support of any state.
We get $600 and change and for teens $800 and change.
I'm in Minnesota. I was doing foster care with the state and decided to go with an private organization. The subtracted with the state.
I received the same kind of kids in the private organization as I did with the state. In fact one of the kids I had in foster care years later I had her again when I was with this private organization.
I apologize, as I did not mean to say that bio-children could not have special needs.
It seems that among foster-children attachment disorders are far more common. Is what I should have said.
:-)
"No offense intended, Galen."
None taken.
"I could not do what you do. I don't have the patience or the energy. But trust me, bio children who have special needs can be equally destructive."
I understand, and yes of course you are correct.
"I admire anyone who can and will."
As do I. I simply will not be among them anymore. As it seems to have come to a matter of Bonnie's health / life, we simply will not be willing to do foster care anymore.
"I apologize, as I did not mean to say that bio-children could not have special needs."
No need to apologize, perhaps one from me is more aptly due. I really was not trying to "critique" your post - I was venting after a sleep deprived day.
I knew of a man in my old Branch who married a woman (his first marriage; her third). She had 3 kids from 3 different fathers. They ended up having a child together. He would not let her work, and she did daycare in her home.
He ended up being a child molestor. They were marked and avoided, and they moved to another state. They ended going back to the state they were marked and avoided in and went back to twit. Supposedly this guy was being watched by twit leadershi*....whatever the H that means. Why the H didn't the BCs or LCs call the cops on that arsehole? I think that kind of decision doesn't show God's mercy, it lets a damn maniac still walk the streets to do harm to children again. Makes me absolutely sick!!!
And that dumb-arse wife stayed with him!!! Can you BELIEVE that!!
Isn't it just amazing how Craig just manifests his believing and excels in just every category of life? I mean, I began to read this thread, having reserved every last ounce of contempt for someone who would molest a child, and Craig barges in, like some snarling, drooling creature in the throes of a rabid frenzy, and steals the show! Who else but "Reverend Martindale" would publically "ream" a dead woman - who JUST died, and in childbirth for God's sake, and her husband too? What sorta surprises me is that he didn't "ream" the baby too. Hey, give him some credit. He probably did.
If this wasn't a true, psychotic episode, it is only because he must have chosen only to behave like a psychotic. Psychotics generally don't have that choice. They just are nuts. Mental freakshows. But Craig, he was always WORKING at it. It takes a man like Craig Martindale to renew his mind enough to act the part, and so convincingly. And on God's behalf, folks. In God's name. And all those people sat around and watched him do it, and... what were they thinking? What were any of us thinking?
Someone has to be mightily depraved to trump a child molester, but Craig always wanted to be "the Best" and the "Star of the Show", I suppose in some incredibly perverse way he has gotten just what he wanted.
As far as what we were thinking- well those who were there --weren't, blind allegiance is a very dangerous thing.
I knew him - and his last wife. Remember that they moved away - seemed like a quick, unexpected move at the time. Remember that she left him - a move that totally baffled me at the time. Perhaps there is a connection.
I viewed both of them as TWI Mainstays at the time. All of this leaves me totally surprised.
OK, I've read - re-read this thread a dozen times this morning. I don't doubt for a minute that the opening post is factual. I'm here to tell you that the implications leave me speechless, almost numb. When he left our area (we helped them pack), he was a shining example of what all of us were about.
I think most people here know how you feel. We've all been through it to one degree or another.
I think most people would agree that anyone who would sexually molest a child deserves no sympathy. They deserve the worst punishment imanginable.
Yet, TWI, as they have done in the past, and continue to do, do nothing about it. Worse yet, they relocate such people, giving them a fresh batch of children. They put them in positions of leadership, further enancing their cover.
This is not an isolated case. I know of children who have had the same horror done to them this year and TWI has done nothing about it.
The purpose of this forum is to expose TWI. I cannot think of anything needing more exposer than how they allow children to be abused this way.
If you know more, please post it. You never know who you may be helping.
LLP, he was (and is) a "shining example," but it should take on a new meaning for you now. It's unlikely anyone will jump in with "we told you so," because we've (mostly) all been there.
And your feelings are appropriate, by the way. They are telling you the truth.
LLP, I'm so sorry. I know how bad it hurts to find out things like this. I liken it to someone jumping out of the bushes and kicking me in the stomach as hard as they can.
TWI sucks and the people who are leaders are even worse because they cover for those evil doers. Heck, they even "counsel" the victims (--> - I mean, help them cope with what happened so they don't rat out the finks), but they don't do anything at all to oust the offenders or protect the flock.
It is really sad, but it's good for you to know and see. Hopefully we'll be able to protect others since TWI isn't.
I would like to point out that many child abusers also happen to be the victims of child abuse themselves. It seems one is supposed to feel sympathy for the victim of child abuse but never the abuser - no, they are to be condemned. That may be the natural response to child abuse, but without this recognition I don't believe the cycle of child abuse can be effectively broken. Sympathy for victim is no more effective treatment for child abuse than condemnation for the abuser.
Because abusive behavior is often cyclic, many health and developmental problems in early childhood can lead to behavioral, educational, and psycho-emotional problems in later adolescence and adulthood, which could lead to the recurrence of abusive behavior. Also, many abused children at first appear acquiescent, cooperative, shy, affectionate, and "normal," but this apparent serenity may mask multiple psychological problems. For this reason, detecting and treating health and developmental problems early in life is important.
The number of child abuse cases like the one reported on this thread are rare, but it seems cases like this always make the headlines. When they do, it only makes those cases appear to be the norm. However the largest perpetrators of child abuse are usually the parents according to the National Child Abuse and Neglect Data Systems most current report. This accounts for about 81 percent of all child abuse cases, which includes birth parents, adoptive parents and stepparents. Other relatives account for an additional 6.6 percent and unmarried partners about 2.9 percent of the perpetrators.
Also interesting to note is that it is females who are in the greater percentage of the perpetrators of child abuse than males. In 2002 58.3 percent of child abuse and neglect perpetrators were females and 41.7 percent were males. Most female perpetrators were younger than male perpetrators and 42.5 percent of females as compared to 32.4 percent of males were younger than 30 years old. 40.3 percent of child victims were maltreated by their mother acting alone; another 19.1 percent were maltreated by their father acting alone; and 18 percent were maltreated by both parents.
Each state has its own policies and procedures for reporting and investigating child abuse and neglect cases. If you have a case and believe that Child Protective Services mishandled an investigation and the case worker or agency supervisor can not answer your concerns, you can also address your concerns to your State Liaison Officer (SLO) for child abuse and neglect. Each state has a designated SLO for child abuse and neglect.
If your saying we should feel sorry for the bastard and get him treatment, I highly disagree. Just because someone did it to you doesn't mean you can do it to someone else. I don't buy the "I can't help it" argument either.
Seems to me the obvious solution is to fry the pervert, preventing him from repeating again on someone else. Should help stop the cycle.
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pjroberge
I think a minister should be allowed to go back to being a minister if: 1) They have child molester branded in their forehead 2) They are castrated 3) They are un-paid as part of their making amend
mrimagine
There is enough blame to spread around to make everyone a little uncomfortable.
Case workers with unmanageable case loads.
Foster parents who can make large money tax free.
But what about a culture that pays anyone biologically able to bear children?
A culture that condones and encourages single women to have and rear children?
A culture that allows a parent or parents to not parent.
Broken children are often very hard to fix. Abused and neglected kids are raised to have a very different idea of "normal." The norms established in the earliest and most impressionable months and years of life seem to become a refuge when everything else in their lives -- home, parents, family, school, friends -- changes and changes again.
Many foster parents are saints. Most begin with high ideals and standards. But to undo the effects of early abuse and neglect seems often to take superhuman ability and patience. Residential treatment is often the dark hole of child welfare.
So there is enough blame to go around. And there is hope. From the perspective of one involved in the system, there is no substitue for the commitment, faith and love of the foster home. The system is limited by many factors; none more important than the caregivers it can recruit and retain.
Do not think there is an easy or quick fix for the problems that we as a society have brought upon ourselves. There is Hell to pay.
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Galen
Rascal, Watered Garden, Krysilis:
Thank you.
Yes we know that it is not our fault, though it is difficult to avoid thinking ‘What if’s.
Mrimagine-
“Case workers with unmanageable case loads.â€
Honesty would help. So long as they agree to lie to every parent, they can not possibly work together with those same parents as a team. If you KNOW that X and Y and Z, have happened to a child and he is likely to need A and B services and he has tendencies toward acting out in W manner; TELL the foster parents. It is not a poor reflection on the state if a child honestly has been through the wringer, or if the child does some thing. So lying to the foster parents is not going to save-face of the case-worker.
Why can’t they simply be honest? They feel that no sane adult would willingly knowingly take-on such a child if they only knew what the child has been diagnosed with.
Talking with other foster parents, many of us would willingly take these children, if you knew before hand what we were getting.
It does seem that more often than not, are at odds with the case-workers.
“Foster parents who can make large money tax free.â€
I have heard of these. In the news.
Say you get $400/month for each child, and you have 3 children. Yes that additional $1200 is now in your pocket. But you had a job before getting a license and had to prove that you could support yourself without the foster-children. $1200/month is not getting anyone rich. We supplied bunk-beds which were destroyed within a year. DESTROYED, out of four bunkbeds, two had been punched through, the supports underneath that hold up the mattress were broken such that the mattresses fell through. A third bunkbed’s frame collapsed, the bolts that go through and hold-on to the headboard and footboard had given loose. The bolt heads had popped plumb off.
Over the course of 2 ½ years we have had 2 different computers for the children to use. After all EVERYONE agrees that in this day and age children need to be computer aware. But the power cord gets cut, the speaker cords get chewed apart, peanut butter gets jammed into the CD drive, these kids will closed-fist pound the keyboards.
Electric blankets have the wires pulled out and chewed. We re-paint the children’s rooms every year, why? Because the pine-sol only removes so much of the feces and urine that have been smeared across those walls.
Raising foster children is a high-cost lifestyle. Unless you keep them in a hand-dug pit in your backyard and feed them rice and beans with a funnel; it is going to cost you considerably more to raise a foster-child. Bio-children are attached to you, they are attached to belongings, they do not destroy things just to amuse themselves that way a RAD, or EID, or ODD child will.
“But what about a culture that pays anyone biologically able to bear children?â€
Especially in the cases where each previous child has been removed for abuse or neglect.
“A culture that condones and encourages single women to have and rear children?â€
There is no way that I am going to touch this one. Each time in the past that I have commented on this topic my head has been bitten off and handed back to me. To me it is fairly obvious the logical consequences, but . . . .
“Many foster parents are saints. Most begin with high ideals and standards. But to undo the effects of early abuse and neglect seems often to take superhuman ability and patience. Residential treatment is often the dark hole of child welfare.â€
I agree.
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Radar OReilly
Galen,
You and your wife are rare humans.....keep following your hearts.
That said, mzimagine has plenty of experience with families, children and children born with severe health issues. Please do not dismiss her insight so quickly. She knows whereof she speaks.
ror
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vickles
Galen,
I totally understand where you are coming from. You have had a nasty experience.
As I've shared before I did foster care for many years. Some social workers were really good and then the others were not. I had good experiences and bad. I've also been investigated. So I know what its like. It is pretty scary.
In all the bad though the good outweighs it all. A few years ago I got a phone call from a young lady that I had in my home in foster care. She called to thank me for saving her life, for the love that I gave her.
To get a phone call like that really did something to me. For that one phone call the years were made positive for me.
I adopted a foster child myself. He does have his problems but, he bondeded with me and very much part of the family. I can't imagine not having him around. He is so outgoing and has the personality that people are attracted to. He is quite loveable.
So, what I'm trying to say is that even though you had a bad experience don't lump it all bad because of it. There are kids out there that do desparately need parents that will love them and they can love back.
True, there are ones that will never bond.
I learned by experience to listen to the catch words the social workers would use before excepting kids. You can pretty well tell what their problems are if you know those words and are listening to them. And most of the time if you know those words to watch for you can ask a lot of questions to see if there is something they aren't saying.
Again, Galen, I'm sorry that this is happening to you and your wife. It is very devestating to you and the kids.
I will keep both bonnie and you in my prayers for sure!!!!
Another thing is that there is money to be made to be made in foster care. I made 1200 dollars a month per kid and would sometimes have three kids. I've heard that they pay 1500 now. I don't think its a bad thing, Foster parents do a lot of work. Its the foster parents that just do it for the money that is the problem.
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Abigail
"Bio-children are attached to you, they are attached to belongings, they do not destroy things just to amuse themselves that way a RAD, or EID, or ODD child will."
Wanna bet? Yesterday my seven year old spent about five minutes deliberately and intentionally smashing toys to pieces downstairs. I knew he was gonna do it, heard him planning it. I let him, briefly, so he could receive the natural consequence, which is to pay for those toys out of his allowance. I figured if I stopped him before hand all he would learn was to be more sneaky about it.
No offense intended, Galen. I could not do what you do. I don't have the patience or the energy. But trust me, bio children who have special needs can be equally destructive.
So I guess what I am saying is - I do it because I love my child to pieces regardless of his difficulties. However, I could not and would not willing take on a child who wasn't mine, who had these issues. I admire anyone who can and will.
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Galen
Radar O'Reilly-
"That said, mzimagine has plenty of experience with families, children and children born with severe health issues."
YEs, it does appear as such.
". . .Please do not dismiss her insight so quickly. She knows whereof she speaks."
I re-read my post.
The only part of Mrimagine's post tht I did not concur with was:
"A culture that condones and encourages single women to have and rear children?"
And I stated at the time that I did not 'openly' concur as such would get me roasted later. I have voiced such previously here on GS, and each time it upset many.
I honestly did not think that I dismissed any part of the post.
:-)
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Galen
vickles:
"Another thing is that there is money to be made to be made in foster care. I made 1200 dollars a month per kid and would sometimes have three kids. I've heard that they pay 1500 now. I don't think its a bad thing, Foster parents do a lot of work. Its the foster parents that just do it for the money that is the problem."
I agree that anyone who does it for the money is a problem.
I have been told that CT pays the highest level of child-support of any state.
We get $600 and change and for teens $800 and change.
You get $1200 and $1500 what state?
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vickles
I'm in Minnesota. I was doing foster care with the state and decided to go with an private organization. The subtracted with the state.
I received the same kind of kids in the private organization as I did with the state. In fact one of the kids I had in foster care years later I had her again when I was with this private organization.
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Galen
Abigail:
I apologize, as I did not mean to say that bio-children could not have special needs.
It seems that among foster-children attachment disorders are far more common. Is what I should have said.
:-)
"No offense intended, Galen."
None taken.
"I could not do what you do. I don't have the patience or the energy. But trust me, bio children who have special needs can be equally destructive."
I understand, and yes of course you are correct.
"I admire anyone who can and will."
As do I. I simply will not be among them anymore. As it seems to have come to a matter of Bonnie's health / life, we simply will not be willing to do foster care anymore.
:-)
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Abigail
"I apologize, as I did not mean to say that bio-children could not have special needs."
No need to apologize, perhaps one from me is more aptly due. I really was not trying to "critique" your post - I was venting after a sleep deprived day.
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Nottawayfer
I knew of a man in my old Branch who married a woman (his first marriage; her third). She had 3 kids from 3 different fathers. They ended up having a child together. He would not let her work, and she did daycare in her home.
He ended up being a child molestor. They were marked and avoided, and they moved to another state. They ended going back to the state they were marked and avoided in and went back to twit. Supposedly this guy was being watched by twit leadershi*....whatever the H that means. Why the H didn't the BCs or LCs call the cops on that arsehole? I think that kind of decision doesn't show God's mercy, it lets a damn maniac still walk the streets to do harm to children again. Makes me absolutely sick!!!
And that dumb-arse wife stayed with him!!! Can you BELIEVE that!!
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satori001
Isn't it just amazing how Craig just manifests his believing and excels in just every category of life? I mean, I began to read this thread, having reserved every last ounce of contempt for someone who would molest a child, and Craig barges in, like some snarling, drooling creature in the throes of a rabid frenzy, and steals the show! Who else but "Reverend Martindale" would publically "ream" a dead woman - who JUST died, and in childbirth for God's sake, and her husband too? What sorta surprises me is that he didn't "ream" the baby too. Hey, give him some credit. He probably did.
If this wasn't a true, psychotic episode, it is only because he must have chosen only to behave like a psychotic. Psychotics generally don't have that choice. They just are nuts. Mental freakshows. But Craig, he was always WORKING at it. It takes a man like Craig Martindale to renew his mind enough to act the part, and so convincingly. And on God's behalf, folks. In God's name. And all those people sat around and watched him do it, and... what were they thinking? What were any of us thinking?
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mstar1
Good Point Satori,
Someone has to be mightily depraved to trump a child molester, but Craig always wanted to be "the Best" and the "Star of the Show", I suppose in some incredibly perverse way he has gotten just what he wanted.
As far as what we were thinking- well those who were there --weren't, blind allegiance is a very dangerous thing.
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lowlylollypoppy99
I knew him - and his last wife. Remember that they moved away - seemed like a quick, unexpected move at the time. Remember that she left him - a move that totally baffled me at the time. Perhaps there is a connection.
I viewed both of them as TWI Mainstays at the time. All of this leaves me totally surprised.
LLP
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lowlylollypoppy99
OK, I've read - re-read this thread a dozen times this morning. I don't doubt for a minute that the opening post is factual. I'm here to tell you that the implications leave me speechless, almost numb. When he left our area (we helped them pack), he was a shining example of what all of us were about.
I feel betrayed.
LLP
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excathedra
i'm sad for you, LLP
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gladtobeout
LLLP
I will pray for the eyes of your understanding to be enlightened. If you need anything, please let me know.
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mzimagine
As a tangent...
Hey Radar et al
That post was NOT by me but by MR imagine
I should met this new guy at greasespot.
I can't IMAGINE what he is like
Disclaimer:
The opinions expressed by MS imagine are mine and mine only
The opinions expressed by MR imagine are his and his only
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Bob
LLP,
I think most people here know how you feel. We've all been through it to one degree or another.
I think most people would agree that anyone who would sexually molest a child deserves no sympathy. They deserve the worst punishment imanginable.
Yet, TWI, as they have done in the past, and continue to do, do nothing about it. Worse yet, they relocate such people, giving them a fresh batch of children. They put them in positions of leadership, further enancing their cover.
This is not an isolated case. I know of children who have had the same horror done to them this year and TWI has done nothing about it.
The purpose of this forum is to expose TWI. I cannot think of anything needing more exposer than how they allow children to be abused this way.
If you know more, please post it. You never know who you may be helping.
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satori001
LLP, he was (and is) a "shining example," but it should take on a new meaning for you now. It's unlikely anyone will jump in with "we told you so," because we've (mostly) all been there.
And your feelings are appropriate, by the way. They are telling you the truth.
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Belle
LLP, I'm so sorry. I know how bad it hurts to find out things like this. I liken it to someone jumping out of the bushes and kicking me in the stomach as hard as they can.
TWI sucks and the people who are leaders are even worse because they cover for those evil doers. Heck, they even "counsel" the victims (
--> - I mean, help them cope with what happened so they don't rat out the finks), but they don't do anything at all to oust the offenders or protect the flock.
It is really sad, but it's good for you to know and see. Hopefully we'll be able to protect others since TWI isn't.
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What The Hay
I would like to point out that many child abusers also happen to be the victims of child abuse themselves. It seems one is supposed to feel sympathy for the victim of child abuse but never the abuser - no, they are to be condemned. That may be the natural response to child abuse, but without this recognition I don't believe the cycle of child abuse can be effectively broken. Sympathy for victim is no more effective treatment for child abuse than condemnation for the abuser.
Because abusive behavior is often cyclic, many health and developmental problems in early childhood can lead to behavioral, educational, and psycho-emotional problems in later adolescence and adulthood, which could lead to the recurrence of abusive behavior. Also, many abused children at first appear acquiescent, cooperative, shy, affectionate, and "normal," but this apparent serenity may mask multiple psychological problems. For this reason, detecting and treating health and developmental problems early in life is important.
The number of child abuse cases like the one reported on this thread are rare, but it seems cases like this always make the headlines. When they do, it only makes those cases appear to be the norm. However the largest perpetrators of child abuse are usually the parents according to the National Child Abuse and Neglect Data Systems most current report. This accounts for about 81 percent of all child abuse cases, which includes birth parents, adoptive parents and stepparents. Other relatives account for an additional 6.6 percent and unmarried partners about 2.9 percent of the perpetrators.
Also interesting to note is that it is females who are in the greater percentage of the perpetrators of child abuse than males. In 2002 58.3 percent of child abuse and neglect perpetrators were females and 41.7 percent were males. Most female perpetrators were younger than male perpetrators and 42.5 percent of females as compared to 32.4 percent of males were younger than 30 years old. 40.3 percent of child victims were maltreated by their mother acting alone; another 19.1 percent were maltreated by their father acting alone; and 18 percent were maltreated by both parents.
Each state has its own policies and procedures for reporting and investigating child abuse and neglect cases. If you have a case and believe that Child Protective Services mishandled an investigation and the case worker or agency supervisor can not answer your concerns, you can also address your concerns to your State Liaison Officer (SLO) for child abuse and neglect. Each state has a designated SLO for child abuse and neglect.
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mzimagine
As a tangent...
Hey Radar et al
That post was NOT by me but by MR imagine
I should meet this new guy at the greasespotcafe
I can't IMAGINE what he is like
Disclaimer:
The opinions expressed by MS imagine are mine and mine only
The opinions expressed by MR imagine are his and his only
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Bob
I'm not sure what your saying Hay.
If your saying we should feel sorry for the bastard and get him treatment, I highly disagree. Just because someone did it to you doesn't mean you can do it to someone else. I don't buy the "I can't help it" argument either.
Seems to me the obvious solution is to fry the pervert, preventing him from repeating again on someone else. Should help stop the cycle.
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