Imagine being taken to a prison to be re-introduced to the father who molested you as an infant. Icck. All because he has parental rights and if he were only freed he could take you home with him.
________________________________________________
When I was married my wife couldn't have children so we decided to go the foster care route and adopt. WOW!! What an eye opener we were in for.
By the time a child in foster care is even considered for adoption, they have been negelected or abused by their bio parents MULTIPLE times. These negelectful/abusive parents are given many chances to change and turn their lives around.
When these poor, pitiful children are finally made available for adoption they are physically and mental screwed up for life. Many will require a lifetime of psychological counseling. They have been passed around the foster care system from family to family so many times, they lack the ability to bond into a normal child/parent relationship. Just to get some of these children to function minimually in a family setting is a major ordeal, and some never do. If anyone is considering going this route, these children will never bond to you as a child would, who say his parents died, and was put up for adoption. You need to be a very patient person and willing to give much love and not expect any in return.
If we decided to adopt, the State wanted it to be an 'open adoption', meaning the low down, rotten parents who were responsible for this damage to their children, would still have some rights to the child.
To me all parental rights should be terminated permanently if they abuse their children. And this guy should not be allowed to be around children once he gets out of prison. These jerks are never 'cured' and will continue abusing children.
Needless to say we did not go this route. I am thankful we didn't for more than one reason, since we divorced, which would have compounded the problem more.
I will say this about the children for adoption within our system...some or I guess a lot of what you say is true but at the same time there are a lot of kids that still can bond with a family. It really depends on the children and what they have been through.
I agree Vickles....so many though have been put throught the winger so to speak, and are really at a disadvantage.
I beleive we should return to something like the old orphanage system of days gone by. In this setting the children would return to the same environment, and not have to readapt to a new setting and new people each time they were taken from their bio parents. Some continuity would be very helpful and would be much less expensive.
quote: If we decided to adopt, the State wanted it to be an 'open adoption', meaning the low down, rotten parents who were responsible for this damage to their children, would still have some rights to the child.
To me all parental rights should be terminated permanently if they abuse their children. And this guy should not be allowed to be around children once he gets out of prison. These jerks are never 'cured' and will continue abusing children. (bold my emphasis)
Right on! The "fox-in-the-chicken-coop" analogy comes to mind.--> -->
quote:But I ask the question, if the waycorp are suppose to be the highly trained spiritually enlighted cream of the crop, able to sniff out a devilspirit a mile away. Why is it that none of the TWI leadership could smell dang on this guys lip when he kissed them?
seth, it's a case of the blind leading the blind....
I don't remember hearing this guy ever got ordained. I think he was even dropped from corpse way back when. I don't know what year. Still it sure gives me the creeps-he either did this as corpse or as twig coord. Yuck.
With thousands being taught intricately how to think and act, and being indoctrinated by two predators (Wierwille and Martindale), I'll be somewhat surprised if we don't see a lot more of this coming to light in the coming years.
:(-->
If someone had the predisposition-TWI doctrine and practice was a breeding ground to bring it all out and let it run rampant.
I knew these people. They seemed like nothing but genuinely good people. Suzie was just a sweetie.
I knew he had been her bus driver and had been told he'd waited awhile to ask her out. But I always thought he was a youngish driver that was attracted to an oldish high school kid, with not many years between their ages. I had no idea he was much older or that he was after her at such a young age. It really changes my perspective on the whole thing.
I remember that corps night after Suzie died. Mark got run through the fan-blades over and over again by lcm. But craig didn't have anything good to say about her, her twi-bosses, or the medical staff, either. Everyone was to blame in his eyes, even "ministry women" as a whole. I had wondered at the time how Mark could even lift his head after the double-whammy of losing his wife and then being publically reamed. And I remember craig telling us that after Mark listened to the tape of what was said, he admitted it was his long-standing fear of losing his wife that had triggered the whole chain of events. I admired him for standing up under all the pressure.
Some time later I saw him pushing the baby in a stroller at HQ. I remember thinking how bittersweet it would be to watch your child grow up and see your missing spouse in their looks, their gestures, their personality. I felt really bad for him.
But now, geez. I almost feel the way I did when the truth about lcm's antics finally sunk into my head. Just... wow... crap... wow... damn... his poor kid... wow... hope he rots... wow...
So do you think the moneyhands knew about his bad ways? Is this another situation that she knew about and refused to do or say anything? Or did they completely agree with craig, their buddy, and not realize this guy was a pervert who shouldn't be around kids?
I know that a couple wanted to adopt an older child from "the system" and he told them that he wouldn't support them or have anything to do with them if they did. He said all those kids in the system are trouble and under devil spirit influence. The couple left TWI, adopted the kid and have a wonderful, wonderful family and live a much more Christian life than the moneyhands ever have.
I think they should lock THEM up for all the evil they witness, know and see and have been aware of in the past without doing anything but covering for the TWIts.
It continually amazes me when I hear this stuff. We adopted a kid from "the system" and while it may or may not have a happy ending, there is not one darn thing in the Bible yay or nay. How these scoundrels could represent themselves to be THE men or women of God and then spew forth doctrine that has NOTHING to do with God, Jesus, the Bible or anything else other than their jaundiced personal opinions is beyond me.
The public or semi-public reamings were just inexcusable. Nothing but hatred and ineffectualness when it came to dealing with real men and women and real lives and the real things that happen in real life.
I tremble before the Almighty when I think of ever having been involved with TWI. And I was never in a leadership position like that.
I wonder if LCM & Co. ever think about what they did to people and tremble?
It would be nice if someone picked this up on the news channels and did an investigation. Tom is loafing in retirement but I like Dan Rather's beady-eyed indignation when he is reporting something that he doesn't like.
This is an abomination. Anyone who performed these acts or condoned it should be stoned. If LCM was going on a rampage, these should have been his target, not gays and such. Then, he would have had something to rant about. He just had to know at least some of these jerks were perverts.
I'm not sure how people here at GS will feel about what I say here, but if LCM had ever attacked my wife after she died like that, I'd be seeking him out in the woods near his chalet and I would show no mercy. I don't think I could hold my temper.
Thank God it wasn't my wife. But it makes me furious to think about Suzie being attacked like that after something horrible happens to her. She needed love and compassion after her death, and especially her family needed it.
I was already 'marked and avoided' after threatening a Corpse guy harassing me on the phone in 1993. (I just said I would come to his house and call him out to the street if he called me again). Nothing really violent. It never came to that.
But threatening and speaking evil of my family, my wife, the closest to me, REALLY gets me angry.
“By the time a child in foster care is even considered for adoption, they have been negelected or abused by their bio parents MULTIPLE times. These negelectful/abusive parents are given many chances to change and turn their lives around.â€
Consider when a situation has grown to such a level that POLICE are in your home removing the children away from you, it is possible that things are BAD.
“When these poor, pitiful children are finally made available for adoption they are physically and mental screwed up for life. Many will require a lifetime of psychological counseling. They have been passed around the foster care system from family to family so many times, they lack the ability to bond into a normal child/parent relationship. Just to get some of these children to function minimually in a family setting is a major ordeal, and some never do. If anyone is considering going this route, these children will never bond to you as a child would, who say his parents died, and was put up for adoption. You need to be a very patient person and willing to give much love and not expect any in return.â€
This is all very true.
We have seen kids so abused by the system, ugh.
If you can hold them in your home, and fight the social workers for the child, eventually you can get ‘services’ for that child. Maybe therapy, maybe a solid diagnosis and medication or special needs help in school. But many other times, the state will fight you and IF you can control a child so he does not get into fights, The state says “well gee he has been acting so good lately we canceled all those expensive therapists, since he does not need it anymoreâ€, or You get him on the waiting list for one therapy center, but by the time he finally gets to the top of the list, something else happens, the child is bounced to another home in another county and he loses he slot for that therapy center. New case-worker, new foster parents, and his previous history is sealed, so everyone has to guess what his problems are and he has to re-build an entirely new diagnosis, before anyone will ever start to think about lining up a new therapist.
The stress and strain are horrible.
Our 10year old foster-son [Tim] was admitted for attempting suicide. The caseworker wanted us to keep him, but we refused on the idea that in residential is the only way he is ever going to get the level of attention that he needs. Later when he is ‘better’ we will gladly discuss bringing him home to us.
Then Tim began making allegations against us, one allegation each week. We have been under an incredible microscope. Investigators stop us on the street, they come into our home at any hour, and they pull our children out of their classrooms, every week.
I have admitted that when the children fight, when one is hitting and biting another, I have in fact grabbed them by their shoulders and pulled them apart, holding them separate to stop hurting each other and the regain their composure. In so doing, I have physically assaulted them, by the state’s standard. [in that I did physically make contact with them with my physical hand on their shoulders. NO bruising, no marks, no hitting, no abusive language.]. The event of which I am guilty, happened over a year ago, and nobody even reported it.
As a result of this one allegation being ‘substantiated’ we are attending another series of courses, as well as being required to under-go psychiatric ‘evaluations’.
10 weeks ago Bonnie had a heart attack and spent a week in Cardiac Ward. I kept things functioning at home and the children were fine. Her cardiologist did lots of testing, and said it is purely stress related: “get rid of the foster-childrenâ€.
I told the caseworkers that we need some light at the end of the tunnel; some hope that one-day will actually be able to adopt these children. They blew us off for another week, canceled the children’s therapists and canceled the contract we had going to provide us with respite-care once a week [a chance to get out of the house without children].
The first week of December Bonnie had a second heart attack. We have decided to forfeit our foster-license. The children are scheduled to be removed 28 Dec, to another foster home.
They have been with us 2 ½ years. We have been a ‘foster-adopt’ home. these children were with us under the assumption that we would be able to adopt them. When they were placed in our home, we were told the children were legally ‘free’. Meaning that all bio-parent’s rights had been terminated. AFTER they were living with us, the caseworkers came and admitted to us that the TPRs had been revoked and the bio-parents’ issue had to be re-done with visitations to the prisons, etc. These children have been through a great deal. It is difficult to estimate who is responsible for the greater abuse; the state case-workers, or the bio-parents.
The state is not allowing us to communicate with the next foster family. So there will be no carrying over of information [allergies, diagnoses, food preferences, family medical histories, nothing].
Vickles-
“I will say this about the children for adoption within our system...some or I guess a lot of what you say is true but at the same time there are a lot of kids that still can bond with a family. It really depends on the children and what they have been through.â€
A common theme we have seen at foster support groups, is that many parents want to adopt, but the children can be very exhaustive. The feces fights, fire-starting, sexual-predators, I am telling you some of these 8 and 10 year olds are a real hand full. You want to help, you give all your focus, and your home. The state will fight you every step. When you have finally been burnt-out, they will just rotate the child on to the next home. Many caseworkers just hope to survive each year and eventually the child will ‘age-out’. No matter what happens, another month goes by, which brings that child closer to 18 years old, and he is no longer a ward of the state.
Stayed-
“I beleive we should return to something like the old orphanage system of days gone by. In this setting the children would return to the same environment, and not have to readapt to a new setting and new people each time they were taken from their bio parents. Some continuity would be very helpful and would be much less expensive.â€
Right now our Tim, is in a residential home. A staff of 30 adults, a cafeteria, a bunk room, a full time therapist, etc. He is really enjoying it. No attachments to anyone, the staff rotates. He hurts someone and he has to write an essay. Good behavior is done by bribery. They run a in-house store, each child ‘earns’ money by not getting into trouble, and each week they can spend their ‘money’ at the store.
They will most likely all be felons when they become adults.
You guys have been heroic in your attempts with these children, only to have hearts broken all the way around by this foolish system. You and Bonnie, and these poor children all have my prayers....
I trust you and Bonnie know that it is the system and not yourselves that is at fault. While our adopted son has not manifested all of the behavior problems you describe, as he grows older more and more "stuff" crops up. He is not attached to us at all. Sunday was his birthday and he didn't even call. He told his wife, from whom he is separated, that since we weren't giving him a present he saw no reason to come by. (We had spent in November $600 on a deposit and first month's rent for an apartment for him, money we put on a credit card because we didn't have cash to give him). He has not paid his rent for December, left the utilities in the landlord's name, and now the landlord wants his belongings out by 12/31. He is living, we think, with a sweet young girl he met, whose car he drives and whose cell phone he carries. He has lost another job, at a Meier's store, saying that they were doing cut-backs.
He was in 22 placements between the ages of 16 months and 3 1/2 years. He was in a foster home from 3 1/2 years until 8, when we got him, that specialized in taking in sexually abused pre-teen and teenage girls. We can just imagine some of what went on.
When a child who has had problems is available for adoption, they often try to send them far away, and boy do they gloss over the problems. I agree with the orphanage idea. Maybe it could be one of those faith-based things they are talking about. Maybe they could use George Mueller's example.
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pjroberge
I think a minister should be allowed to go back to being a minister if: 1) They have child molester branded in their forehead 2) They are castrated 3) They are un-paid as part of their making amend
krys
...that didn't come out right....I'll try again later
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TheSongRemainsTheSame
maybe he'll have a seat at the Ro Co Ped Table, surely one glove Jackson sponsors such brotherhood
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vickles
I think the guy should have gotten more than six years. Usually when they say a time they can get paroled out earlier.
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Stayed Too Long
Galen:
________________________________________________
Imagine being taken to a prison to be re-introduced to the father who molested you as an infant. Icck. All because he has parental rights and if he were only freed he could take you home with him.
________________________________________________
When I was married my wife couldn't have children so we decided to go the foster care route and adopt. WOW!! What an eye opener we were in for.
By the time a child in foster care is even considered for adoption, they have been negelected or abused by their bio parents MULTIPLE times. These negelectful/abusive parents are given many chances to change and turn their lives around.
When these poor, pitiful children are finally made available for adoption they are physically and mental screwed up for life. Many will require a lifetime of psychological counseling. They have been passed around the foster care system from family to family so many times, they lack the ability to bond into a normal child/parent relationship. Just to get some of these children to function minimually in a family setting is a major ordeal, and some never do. If anyone is considering going this route, these children will never bond to you as a child would, who say his parents died, and was put up for adoption. You need to be a very patient person and willing to give much love and not expect any in return.
If we decided to adopt, the State wanted it to be an 'open adoption', meaning the low down, rotten parents who were responsible for this damage to their children, would still have some rights to the child.
To me all parental rights should be terminated permanently if they abuse their children. And this guy should not be allowed to be around children once he gets out of prison. These jerks are never 'cured' and will continue abusing children.
Needless to say we did not go this route. I am thankful we didn't for more than one reason, since we divorced, which would have compounded the problem more.
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vickles
I will say this about the children for adoption within our system...some or I guess a lot of what you say is true but at the same time there are a lot of kids that still can bond with a family. It really depends on the children and what they have been through.
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Stayed Too Long
I agree Vickles....so many though have been put throught the winger so to speak, and are really at a disadvantage.
I beleive we should return to something like the old orphanage system of days gone by. In this setting the children would return to the same environment, and not have to readapt to a new setting and new people each time they were taken from their bio parents. Some continuity would be very helpful and would be much less expensive.
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vickles
I totally agree with you.
At the very least they wouldn't be having to move to a different family each time they went back to their parents for a few months.
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dmiller
Right on! The "fox-in-the-chicken-coop" analogy comes to mind.
--> 
-->
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excathedra
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smurfette
I don't remember hearing this guy ever got ordained. I think he was even dropped from corpse way back when. I don't know what year. Still it sure gives me the creeps-he either did this as corpse or as twig coord. Yuck.
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mstar1
With thousands being taught intricately how to think and act, and being indoctrinated by two predators (Wierwille and Martindale), I'll be somewhat surprised if we don't see a lot more of this coming to light in the coming years.
If someone had the predisposition-TWI doctrine and practice was a breeding ground to bring it all out and let it run rampant.
..everything after its kind..
I can't believe they only gave him 6 years..
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Ham
Probably all he could give him? Judges comments kinda say that he would put him in the cooler forever if he could.
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Watered Garden
A cooler six feet under would be appropriate for sexual child abusers. They never get "cured". This guy doesn't even sound sorry.
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TheHighWay
I'm just stunned...
I knew these people. They seemed like nothing but genuinely good people. Suzie was just a sweetie.
I knew he had been her bus driver and had been told he'd waited awhile to ask her out. But I always thought he was a youngish driver that was attracted to an oldish high school kid, with not many years between their ages. I had no idea he was much older or that he was after her at such a young age. It really changes my perspective on the whole thing.
I remember that corps night after Suzie died. Mark got run through the fan-blades over and over again by lcm. But craig didn't have anything good to say about her, her twi-bosses, or the medical staff, either. Everyone was to blame in his eyes, even "ministry women" as a whole. I had wondered at the time how Mark could even lift his head after the double-whammy of losing his wife and then being publically reamed. And I remember craig telling us that after Mark listened to the tape of what was said, he admitted it was his long-standing fear of losing his wife that had triggered the whole chain of events. I admired him for standing up under all the pressure.
Some time later I saw him pushing the baby in a stroller at HQ. I remember thinking how bittersweet it would be to watch your child grow up and see your missing spouse in their looks, their gestures, their personality. I felt really bad for him.
But now, geez. I almost feel the way I did when the truth about lcm's antics finally sunk into my head. Just... wow... crap... wow... damn... his poor kid... wow... hope he rots... wow...
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excathedra
and i'm not referring to that guy when i say dog. i am referring to wayfers
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Belle
So do you think the moneyhands knew about his bad ways? Is this another situation that she knew about and refused to do or say anything? Or did they completely agree with craig, their buddy, and not realize this guy was a pervert who shouldn't be around kids?
I know that a couple wanted to adopt an older child from "the system" and he told them that he wouldn't support them or have anything to do with them if they did. He said all those kids in the system are trouble and under devil spirit influence. The couple left TWI, adopted the kid and have a wonderful, wonderful family and live a much more Christian life than the moneyhands ever have.
I think they should lock THEM up for all the evil they witness, know and see and have been aware of in the past without doing anything but covering for the TWIts.
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Watered Garden
It continually amazes me when I hear this stuff. We adopted a kid from "the system" and while it may or may not have a happy ending, there is not one darn thing in the Bible yay or nay. How these scoundrels could represent themselves to be THE men or women of God and then spew forth doctrine that has NOTHING to do with God, Jesus, the Bible or anything else other than their jaundiced personal opinions is beyond me.
The public or semi-public reamings were just inexcusable. Nothing but hatred and ineffectualness when it came to dealing with real men and women and real lives and the real things that happen in real life.
I tremble before the Almighty when I think of ever having been involved with TWI. And I was never in a leadership position like that.
I wonder if LCM & Co. ever think about what they did to people and tremble?
WG
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Watered Garden
It would be nice if someone picked this up on the news channels and did an investigation. Tom is loafing in retirement but I like Dan Rather's beady-eyed indignation when he is reporting something that he doesn't like.
This is an abomination. Anyone who performed these acts or condoned it should be stoned. If LCM was going on a rampage, these should have been his target, not gays and such. Then, he would have had something to rant about. He just had to know at least some of these jerks were perverts.
WG
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Ham
Why do I smell another lawsuite.. kid's gonna need help. Best use of all that ABS I put in once.
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DaddyHoundog
I did not know Mark but knew Michael Naberschnig, we were wow siblings...he was in no way even remotely likely this brother of his...
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Eagle
I'm not sure how people here at GS will feel about what I say here, but if LCM had ever attacked my wife after she died like that, I'd be seeking him out in the woods near his chalet and I would show no mercy. I don't think I could hold my temper.
Thank God it wasn't my wife. But it makes me furious to think about Suzie being attacked like that after something horrible happens to her. She needed love and compassion after her death, and especially her family needed it.
I was already 'marked and avoided' after threatening a Corpse guy harassing me on the phone in 1993. (I just said I would come to his house and call him out to the street if he called me again). Nothing really violent. It never came to that.
But threatening and speaking evil of my family, my wife, the closest to me, REALLY gets me angry.
Well, God Bless Suzie and may God forgive LCM.
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Galen
Stayed-
“By the time a child in foster care is even considered for adoption, they have been negelected or abused by their bio parents MULTIPLE times. These negelectful/abusive parents are given many chances to change and turn their lives around.â€
Consider when a situation has grown to such a level that POLICE are in your home removing the children away from you, it is possible that things are BAD.
“When these poor, pitiful children are finally made available for adoption they are physically and mental screwed up for life. Many will require a lifetime of psychological counseling. They have been passed around the foster care system from family to family so many times, they lack the ability to bond into a normal child/parent relationship. Just to get some of these children to function minimually in a family setting is a major ordeal, and some never do. If anyone is considering going this route, these children will never bond to you as a child would, who say his parents died, and was put up for adoption. You need to be a very patient person and willing to give much love and not expect any in return.â€
This is all very true.
We have seen kids so abused by the system, ugh.
If you can hold them in your home, and fight the social workers for the child, eventually you can get ‘services’ for that child. Maybe therapy, maybe a solid diagnosis and medication or special needs help in school. But many other times, the state will fight you and IF you can control a child so he does not get into fights, The state says “well gee he has been acting so good lately we canceled all those expensive therapists, since he does not need it anymoreâ€, or You get him on the waiting list for one therapy center, but by the time he finally gets to the top of the list, something else happens, the child is bounced to another home in another county and he loses he slot for that therapy center. New case-worker, new foster parents, and his previous history is sealed, so everyone has to guess what his problems are and he has to re-build an entirely new diagnosis, before anyone will ever start to think about lining up a new therapist.
The stress and strain are horrible.
Our 10year old foster-son [Tim] was admitted for attempting suicide. The caseworker wanted us to keep him, but we refused on the idea that in residential is the only way he is ever going to get the level of attention that he needs. Later when he is ‘better’ we will gladly discuss bringing him home to us.
Then Tim began making allegations against us, one allegation each week. We have been under an incredible microscope. Investigators stop us on the street, they come into our home at any hour, and they pull our children out of their classrooms, every week.
I have admitted that when the children fight, when one is hitting and biting another, I have in fact grabbed them by their shoulders and pulled them apart, holding them separate to stop hurting each other and the regain their composure. In so doing, I have physically assaulted them, by the state’s standard. [in that I did physically make contact with them with my physical hand on their shoulders. NO bruising, no marks, no hitting, no abusive language.]. The event of which I am guilty, happened over a year ago, and nobody even reported it.
As a result of this one allegation being ‘substantiated’ we are attending another series of courses, as well as being required to under-go psychiatric ‘evaluations’.
10 weeks ago Bonnie had a heart attack and spent a week in Cardiac Ward. I kept things functioning at home and the children were fine. Her cardiologist did lots of testing, and said it is purely stress related: “get rid of the foster-childrenâ€.
I told the caseworkers that we need some light at the end of the tunnel; some hope that one-day will actually be able to adopt these children. They blew us off for another week, canceled the children’s therapists and canceled the contract we had going to provide us with respite-care once a week [a chance to get out of the house without children].
The first week of December Bonnie had a second heart attack. We have decided to forfeit our foster-license. The children are scheduled to be removed 28 Dec, to another foster home.
They have been with us 2 ½ years. We have been a ‘foster-adopt’ home. these children were with us under the assumption that we would be able to adopt them. When they were placed in our home, we were told the children were legally ‘free’. Meaning that all bio-parent’s rights had been terminated. AFTER they were living with us, the caseworkers came and admitted to us that the TPRs had been revoked and the bio-parents’ issue had to be re-done with visitations to the prisons, etc. These children have been through a great deal. It is difficult to estimate who is responsible for the greater abuse; the state case-workers, or the bio-parents.
The state is not allowing us to communicate with the next foster family. So there will be no carrying over of information [allergies, diagnoses, food preferences, family medical histories, nothing].
Vickles-
“I will say this about the children for adoption within our system...some or I guess a lot of what you say is true but at the same time there are a lot of kids that still can bond with a family. It really depends on the children and what they have been through.â€
A common theme we have seen at foster support groups, is that many parents want to adopt, but the children can be very exhaustive. The feces fights, fire-starting, sexual-predators, I am telling you some of these 8 and 10 year olds are a real hand full. You want to help, you give all your focus, and your home. The state will fight you every step. When you have finally been burnt-out, they will just rotate the child on to the next home. Many caseworkers just hope to survive each year and eventually the child will ‘age-out’. No matter what happens, another month goes by, which brings that child closer to 18 years old, and he is no longer a ward of the state.
Stayed-
“I beleive we should return to something like the old orphanage system of days gone by. In this setting the children would return to the same environment, and not have to readapt to a new setting and new people each time they were taken from their bio parents. Some continuity would be very helpful and would be much less expensive.â€
Right now our Tim, is in a residential home. A staff of 30 adults, a cafeteria, a bunk room, a full time therapist, etc. He is really enjoying it. No attachments to anyone, the staff rotates. He hurts someone and he has to write an essay. Good behavior is done by bribery. They run a in-house store, each child ‘earns’ money by not getting into trouble, and each week they can spend their ‘money’ at the store.
They will most likely all be felons when they become adults.
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rascal
Galen, I am so sorry for this kick in the teeth.
You guys have been heroic in your attempts with these children, only to have hearts broken all the way around by this foolish system. You and Bonnie, and these poor children all have my prayers....
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Watered Garden
Galen,
I trust you and Bonnie know that it is the system and not yourselves that is at fault. While our adopted son has not manifested all of the behavior problems you describe, as he grows older more and more "stuff" crops up. He is not attached to us at all. Sunday was his birthday and he didn't even call. He told his wife, from whom he is separated, that since we weren't giving him a present he saw no reason to come by. (We had spent in November $600 on a deposit and first month's rent for an apartment for him, money we put on a credit card because we didn't have cash to give him). He has not paid his rent for December, left the utilities in the landlord's name, and now the landlord wants his belongings out by 12/31. He is living, we think, with a sweet young girl he met, whose car he drives and whose cell phone he carries. He has lost another job, at a Meier's store, saying that they were doing cut-backs.
He was in 22 placements between the ages of 16 months and 3 1/2 years. He was in a foster home from 3 1/2 years until 8, when we got him, that specialized in taking in sexually abused pre-teen and teenage girls. We can just imagine some of what went on.
When a child who has had problems is available for adoption, they often try to send them far away, and boy do they gloss over the problems. I agree with the orphanage idea. Maybe it could be one of those faith-based things they are talking about. Maybe they could use George Mueller's example.
Galen you and Bonnie are in my prayers bigtimes.
Love ya's
WG
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