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Happy Ho Ho yer a$$


GrouchoMarxJr
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Twas the night before the happy household holiday, and all through the chalet...

Not a creature was stirring, except Craig practicing his ballet...

His lesbian wife was asleep, and that's just as well...

When he boffs the young corps girl no one will tell...

He leaps in his leotards with the greatest of ease...

When he hears a strange sound, perhaps just a breeze?...

But there in the moonlight a figure appears...

It must be an angel to dispel all my fears!...

But as it draws closer, he measures it's stride...

It's staggering forward, from side to side...

A familiar smell he cannot deny,

He starts to panic, he starts to cry...

When in through the door bursts a creature so vile...

With death in his eyes, on his lips a cursed smile...

As the creature draws closer, his legs turn to stone...

He cannot escape, he is truly alone...

The creature grabs Craig by the throat and the leg...

Craig starts to whimper, Craig starts to beg...

But the creature throws Craig to the floor with a thud and a throttle...

He pulls from his jacket an old dusty bottle...

He tips his head back and pours down the swill...

He wipes off his chin and he shakes off the chill...

He then stares in anger with blood in his eyes...

Craig tries to crawl, Craig tells some lies...

But the creature strikes down with the bottle in hand...

and says that's what you get in your "promised land"...

The creature goes back to the place whence he came...

The stuff in the bottle is Drambuie by name...

Before he lays down in his grave by the fountain...

He screams out these words, like Moses on the mountain...

"I got rid of the bastard, he put up no fight...

so have a happy ho ho, and to all a good night" icon_cool.gif

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"A" for effort. But...

UH, why is Slick Vic's mouldering, frost-bitten, Drambuie-breathed ghost made out to be some kind of glorified Ghost-of-Christmas-Past/Santa/Moses? Why is he, the author of corruption at Way World, taking revenge on his greatest and most LOYal protege? Envy, is all I can think, but you imply some kind of retribution. For what?

Then again, Craig hasn't been tiptoeing through the tulips outside the Corps Chalet for some time. Seems a bit dated.

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Yeah...I wrote it at 3:30 in the morning...I saw Vic as being upset at Craiggers for changing his doctrine, trashing his classes, ending his wow program and roa, running off all his former followers and pretty much destroying the ministry...That would be Vic's perspective, I would guess...

Dated?...right again satori...maybe somebody should write one more current...You know:

...Twas the night before HoHo and all through the house...

...Rosie had Donna take off her blouse...

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