There may be something to this wiping of the arse.. from other threads, I read that the poor staffers had to sign a sheet declaring that they were going to the toilet. In-friggin credible!
And it would not suprise me if the same policy is still in effect. Even at the worst job I ever had, I could get at least a short break to refresh. What does this say about TWI? I used to think staffers were so "blessed" to be near the fire, so to speak. Now I see it must have been about the worst job in the world..
What does suprise me is that they do not make them go to bathroom by twos. Apparently that is how they have to do everything else. Probably could give a good justification for it to. Yep- "Old Joe died in the John regurgitating and choking on the last household fellowship teaching."
It would be hard for me to imagine what it must have been like to have been on staff. Never alone, probably never a moment to relax- even in the shower!
No private phone calls and no internet access, either.
But, you see, Mr. H, we only do this so that "the world" doesn't become a distraction. This is so that you can fully concentrate on living The Word and serving God to the best of your ability. You do want to be pleasing to God, don't you. ;)--> We'll tell you if there's anything you need to know.
Newcomer..."Is it true that Rev. Martindale likes to have sex with other men's wives?"
Twi..."Of course he does. He learned it from Dr. Wierwille who was constantly having sex with any woman that he could coerce into the back of his motorcoach"
Newcomer..."But isn't that wrong?"
Twi..."Not really. You see, when Gawd annoints a man to rule over other people, He includes a provision that allows the annointed one to have sex with anyone he wants."
Newcomer..."But what if the husband doesn't like his wife having sex with Rev Martindale?"
Twi..."The man would be asked to renew his mind and if that didn't work, we would subliminally encourage him to commit suicide"
Newcomer..."Gosh, that doesn't sound very Christian to me"
Twi..."Well, actually Newcomer, you sound like a trouble maker and that means that you are full of demons and we don't like you anymore"
Newcomer..."Are you for real? How does anybody in their right mind support your filthy little cult?"
Twi..."Listen up reprobate, I want you off this property right now! Get thee hence, and don't ever come back!"
Newcomer..."One small problem numbnuts, this is MY house!"
...Ensuing fistfight leaves cult leader with broken nose, two cracked ribs, and his front teeth kicked out.
UH, you left out the part about sex being no different than putting your finger in someone's ear, but other than that I think you got it down precisely!
JOE BELIVER: Yes i'm going to Yellowstone for a little vacation.
HEAD HONCHO: What??????????? You have enough money to take a vacation???????????? You were supposed to give, "cough sputter gurgle wheeze", I mean abundantly share most of that money to help keep GOD's protection in place. We will have to have a full report on why you haven't fully abundantley share like you should have. If you have enough to take a vacation then you haven't been abundantly sharing like you should have and withholding God's blessings on yourself.
UH, that's the line LCM would give to women he wanted to errrr...put his finger in their ear. I think I read that he also used that line to justify his actions when he was confronted at an advanced class.
Someone more in the know can shed some light on it, though.
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Ham
There may be something to this wiping of the arse.. from other threads, I read that the poor staffers had to sign a sheet declaring that they were going to the toilet. In-friggin credible!
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Ham
And it would not suprise me if the same policy is still in effect. Even at the worst job I ever had, I could get at least a short break to refresh. What does this say about TWI? I used to think staffers were so "blessed" to be near the fire, so to speak. Now I see it must have been about the worst job in the world..
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dmiller
Would that be on a sheet of toilet paper?
:D-->
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dmiller
And after it was signed, I can only guess where it was applied!!
:P--> 
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Ham
What does suprise me is that they do not make them go to bathroom by twos. Apparently that is how they have to do everything else. Probably could give a good justification for it to. Yep- "Old Joe died in the John regurgitating and choking on the last household fellowship teaching."
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Belle
At Indiana they did make you shower together. I don't know about the other locations.
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Ham
It would be hard for me to imagine what it must have been like to have been on staff. Never alone, probably never a moment to relax- even in the shower!
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Belle
No private phone calls and no internet access, either.
But, you see, Mr. H, we only do this so that "the world" doesn't become a distraction. This is so that you can fully concentrate on living The Word and serving God to the best of your ability. You do want to be pleasing to God, don't you.
;)--> We'll tell you if there's anything you need to know.
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excathedra
no private frikkin phonecalls ???????
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Ham
Nope. And I bet that the leaderdang really hates cell phones.
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Technobyte
They made people shower together???
I've heard of that. Something about, "...don't drop the soap."
Technobyte
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GrouchoMarxJr
Newcomer..."Is it true that Rev. Martindale likes to have sex with other men's wives?"
Twi..."Of course he does. He learned it from Dr. Wierwille who was constantly having sex with any woman that he could coerce into the back of his motorcoach"
Newcomer..."But isn't that wrong?"
Twi..."Not really. You see, when Gawd annoints a man to rule over other people, He includes a provision that allows the annointed one to have sex with anyone he wants."
Newcomer..."But what if the husband doesn't like his wife having sex with Rev Martindale?"
Twi..."The man would be asked to renew his mind and if that didn't work, we would subliminally encourage him to commit suicide"
Newcomer..."Gosh, that doesn't sound very Christian to me"
Twi..."Well, actually Newcomer, you sound like a trouble maker and that means that you are full of demons and we don't like you anymore"
Newcomer..."Are you for real? How does anybody in their right mind support your filthy little cult?"
Twi..."Listen up reprobate, I want you off this property right now! Get thee hence, and don't ever come back!"
Newcomer..."One small problem numbnuts, this is MY house!"
...Ensuing fistfight leaves cult leader with broken nose, two cracked ribs, and his front teeth kicked out.
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Ham
Ha ha ha ha.. sometimes we can only wish, Uncle H.
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Belle
UH, you left out the part about sex being no different than putting your finger in someone's ear, but other than that I think you got it down precisely!
LOVE IT!
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GrouchoMarxJr
...finger in someone's ear the same as sex? I never heard that one...sheeesch! I suppose safe sex would involve a Q tip?
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danteh1
JOE BELIVER: Yes i'm going to Yellowstone for a little vacation.
HEAD HONCHO: What??????????? You have enough money to take a vacation???????????? You were supposed to give, "cough sputter gurgle wheeze", I mean abundantly share most of that money to help keep GOD's protection in place. We will have to have a full report on why you haven't fully abundantley share like you should have. If you have enough to take a vacation then you haven't been abundantly sharing like you should have and withholding God's blessings on yourself.
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Belle
UH, that's the line LCM would give to women he wanted to errrr...put his finger in their ear. I think I read that he also used that line to justify his actions when he was confronted at an advanced class.
Someone more in the know can shed some light on it, though.
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Ham
Now I know why they really sell so many ear muffs this time of year!
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Ham
Should always have a pair in a glass case, hammer within reach. "Break in case of presence of MOG."
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Ham
No Uncle H, I think the q tips and alcohol are for "sanitary sex". You need gloves for "safe sex".
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excathedra
is that what weewillie's term earballs is about ?
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Ham
Ha ha ha ha ha!
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Ham
Gruesome!
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Ham
Exie, have you looked at Rosies pic on the main site recently? I think she must be wearing her earballs around her neck..
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