Zshot - - all of us women require some maintenance or else we wouldn't be female! I know you know that. What I'm wondering is, how much is too much in your view?
One rule to keep in mind, whether you are on a date or not, is: NEVER, EVER send back your meal to be recooked.
If there is something SERIOUSLY wrong with it, like it's half raw, or there's a cockroach, leave the restaurant. Make sure you talk to the manager, and don't pay for the meal.
If it's just not quite the way you like it - a bit too salty, medium rare instead of medium - just eat it, and make a mental note to either never go back to that restaurant or to give them a second chance later, and have a brief conversation with the manager.
If you ordered onion rings and got fries, that's okay, have the server switch that part.
If it's a restaurant that you've been going to for a long time, well, everyone has an off day. But if it's so serious that it's inedible, they don't deserve your continued patronage - a problem like that is never a one-time occurrence.
And if they served it so bad the first time, what makes you think that the next time will be better? And if it's only a little off, why make a fuss and make the servers and cooks work harder and make everyone else at your table a bit uncomfortable?
I say all of this after having managed restaurants for 10 years.
Trust me, you do NOT want to .... off the people that handle your food.
"Just a salad" - when you order just a salad, a guy will take this as a HUGE red flag! He will take it that you are not being yourself.
--> Why should a guy take this as 'not being yourself'?
quote: Trust me, you do NOT want to .... off the people that handle your food.
If I were the cook/waiter/manager, I'd be **REAL** careful with that kind of attitude, and the potential trouble that it might lead to. If the cook/waiter/manager decide to screw with the customer's food 'cause they are ....ed at them, and the customer gets sick or otherwise screwed over by the food, all it takes is 2 trips by the customer.
1) To the doctor to not only get treated, but to get medical proof that the food was indeed tampered with.
2) To an attorney, to start proceedings to sue that entire restaurant out of existance.
Thats what *I* would do. So trust me, you do NOT want to screw with the customer in that kind of setting. Cooks/waiters/managers who do that find themselves working at Mickey Dee's going "You want fries to go with that", for the rest of their lives.
“If a girl starts ordering ala-carte and/or has "special" requests for items off the menu... RUN away!!!
There are 2 things I don't like in a woman, they are:
1. "high maintenance"
2. too fussy”
I agree.
Krysilis-
“All of us women require some maintenance or else we wouldn't be female! I know you know that. What I'm wondering is, how much is too much in your view?”
No, not really. That is truly not the case, sorry.
Steve-
“"Just a salad" - when you order just a salad, a guy will take this as a HUGE red flag! He will take it that you are not being yourself.”
I don’t know about that, I commonly order a chef’s salad, or grilled-chicken salad.
“One rule to keep in mind, whether you are on a date or not, is: NEVER, EVER send back your meal to be recooked.”
Agreed.
Our eldest son ‘Daniel’ does the McDonalds thing and has off and on for a while, he has accumulated over 2 years on their grills. He tells of things that others do during the ‘re-cook’ requests.
Never Never ever send food back.
Our stereo’s CD player holds up to 400 CDs, so it takes a while to cycle through the CDs in it [though it is not close to full]. I am reminded to 2 ‘oldie’ songs that come up every now and again.
One is saying to take out a rich man’s daughter and expect to pay a lot for dinner, take out a poor man’s daughter and any food will do. To which I would have to agree.
The other one says “make an ugly girl your wife”, the song it does however make a good solid case for it’s sentiment.
Doesn't need allot frills, easy going. Down to earth menatalty. Orders straight off the menu. Doesn't require more than 30 min to get ready to go someplace (and this time includes a shower).
2. Above standard:
Likes a few frills, fairly easy going. Down to earth, for the most part. Orders off the menu with "extras" (sour cream, salad dressing, appitizers). Requires more time to get ready to go out, more makeup and more time on the hair.
3. High maintaince:
Loves the frills, demanding. Head in the clouds or up her @$$. Orders ala carte, with the "extras" and dessert. Takes over a hour to get ready to go out. everything has to be "perfect".
Of course this is just a vague and general description.
when a woman says, "Oh, I'll just have a salad" - not meaning a chef's salad or a caesar salad, but a plain dinner salad.
This tells the guy that this girl is either continuously dieting, or ate beforehand, or is thinking about ditching you and meeting up with someone else.
Or it says that she's trying to show the guy that she's frugal or something.
Or has self-esteem issues.
If "just a salad" is ordered, it makes one think that that woman is pretty tense about something or other.
If you are talking....you already have met the guy somewhere (work, the grocery, the gym, at a friends house, etc....) then just be yourself and follow your own gut rules about what kind of food you eat, and how you eat it. Can't go wrong with something healty and simple to eat like steak/chicken breast & salad.
If you are talking about BLIND FIRST DATE, you have never PHYSICALLY MET the man, then UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES HAVE A DINNER DATE FOR YOUR FIRST DATE. If you HATE HIM....you have to spend minimum of an hour with him, and one or both of you is stuck with a dinner tab.
If it is a BLIND first date, meet for lunch, or coffee and dessert at Starbucks or some where like that, perhaps somewhere open air with a patio.
My opinion on first dates....keep all your avenues of "possible escape" open.
MOST IMPORTANTLY......make sure you tell me if he is cute ;)-->
ror
OH YEAH, if you go on a first date with Zshot, just remember, to ask for salad dressing for your salad puts you in a higher category of *maintenance.
One thing that I watch for in a date is if they send their food back and act too fussy. It completely turns me off. I would think it wouldn't look to good for a woman to do that either. Kinda makes the date uncomfortable.
If I was going on a first date I wouldn't order salad. They never cut the lettuce in itty bitty pieces and I sometimes get too much on the fork. Then I end up stuffing my face.
Finger foods are always good as long as it isn't messy.
Chicken is rather tedius since you have to use a fork...never use your hands.... :D-->
Hamburgers are always easy as long as you don't have too much on it. Don't have onions on it... ;)-->
When you go out for a meal always let him order first so you know what price range to go by.
End the date right away if he forgets his wallet and you end up paying for it... -->
I don't know what kinda restaurants you managed, but in mine I want my customers to send back any food that is not cooked properly as in too bloody rare or too well done. And my customers know that I will make it right without spitting on the food.
And .... as a customer if I am gonna pay $40 bucks for a something like a steak, I expect it to be cooked the way I ordered it cooked. I have no qualms about politely having my order redone. I doubt that cooks mess with the food as much as you make out. I mean what is their motivation? - it's not their money.
Sure, there are rare occurances but it is the exception rather than the rule. You are more likely to get stuff from off the floor than intentionally sabotaged food.
Now food on the first date? Whats wrong with raw oysters or spaghetti? Guess Cajuns or Italians never go on first dates. The heck with Mrs Owens and her ettiquette - eat what you want and get it over with. Why put on pretenses?
BTW, Cowgirl and I had smoked oysters on our first date !
quote: If you are talking....you already have met the guy somewhere (work, the grocery, the gym, at a friends house, etc....) then just be yourself and....
Belle -- did you already know the *prospective* date, or is it someone you haven't met yet? If it's someone you know, I wouldn't worry either. If it's someone you've never met, do like others here suggested -- go for a walk, and coffee.
Belle, have fun and go out for drinks or coffee, is my suggestion. It worked for Tom and I...Our first date lasted about 5 hours and he e-mailed the next day to say he had a nice time....Which I took as a very good sign that we enjoyed each other's company equally well.
I tend to let people know (friends) how much fun I had after the event because I think that is good manners.
High maintence or low maintenance...you either are "into" the person or your not....I take between 5 minutes to 40 minutes to get ready and the windows can be down in the car in the summer because my hair doesn't have to be perfect.
The truth is dating takes effort. It shouldn't feel like an obligation or a sentence to be served. If your really nervous around someone and it doesn't go away withing a date or two, I think that is a warning sign that they are not right for you.
I dated a guy that's ex-wife called him "Mr. Opionion" and I soon found out why. I could not relax around this person and felt like I HAD to make things PERFECT!!! Those days are gone.
A "date" can be one of three things. One is a fruit from a certain palm tree. The second is a position on a calendar. They're not talking about those two "dates".
The third is a meeting, usually with romance implied, between a man and a woman. The reason it is called a "date" is because it is usually pre-scheduled for a certain day and time, like the date on a calendar.
Many things can be done on a date, go to the movies, play a game, go have dinner at a restaraunt, etc, etc.
Recommended Posts
Steve!
"Just a salad" - when you order just a salad, a guy will take this as a HUGE red flag! He will take it that you are not being yourself.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Zshot
If a girl starts ordering ala-carte and/or has "special" requests for items off the menu... RUN away!!!
There are 2 things I don't like in a woman, they are:
1. "high maintaince"
2. too fussy
Link to comment
Share on other sites
krys
Zshot - - all of us women require some maintenance or else we wouldn't be female! I know you know that. What I'm wondering is, how much is too much in your view?
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Steve!
One rule to keep in mind, whether you are on a date or not, is: NEVER, EVER send back your meal to be recooked.
If there is something SERIOUSLY wrong with it, like it's half raw, or there's a cockroach, leave the restaurant. Make sure you talk to the manager, and don't pay for the meal.
If it's just not quite the way you like it - a bit too salty, medium rare instead of medium - just eat it, and make a mental note to either never go back to that restaurant or to give them a second chance later, and have a brief conversation with the manager.
If you ordered onion rings and got fries, that's okay, have the server switch that part.
If it's a restaurant that you've been going to for a long time, well, everyone has an off day. But if it's so serious that it's inedible, they don't deserve your continued patronage - a problem like that is never a one-time occurrence.
And if they served it so bad the first time, what makes you think that the next time will be better? And if it's only a little off, why make a fuss and make the servers and cooks work harder and make everyone else at your table a bit uncomfortable?
I say all of this after having managed restaurants for 10 years.
Trust me, you do NOT want to .... off the people that handle your food.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
GarthP2000
If I were the cook/waiter/manager, I'd be **REAL** careful with that kind of attitude, and the potential trouble that it might lead to. If the cook/waiter/manager decide to screw with the customer's food 'cause they are ....ed at them, and the customer gets sick or otherwise screwed over by the food, all it takes is 2 trips by the customer.
1) To the doctor to not only get treated, but to get medical proof that the food was indeed tampered with.
2) To an attorney, to start proceedings to sue that entire restaurant out of existance.
Thats what *I* would do. So trust me, you do NOT want to screw with the customer in that kind of setting. Cooks/waiters/managers who do that find themselves working at Mickey Dee's going "You want fries to go with that", for the rest of their lives.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Steve!
Believe what you want, Garth, my scenario happens WAY more than yours.
All I'm saying is, you are much better off if you never send your food back to the kitchen to be redone.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
GarthP2000
Okay, point taken, tho' I still would nail the pimple faced cook w/ an attitude if I was in that situation.
So what about my 1st question: Why is getting just salad mean that the lady isn't being herself?
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Galen
Zshot-
“If a girl starts ordering ala-carte and/or has "special" requests for items off the menu... RUN away!!!
There are 2 things I don't like in a woman, they are:
1. "high maintenance"
2. too fussy”
I agree.
Krysilis-
“All of us women require some maintenance or else we wouldn't be female! I know you know that. What I'm wondering is, how much is too much in your view?”
No, not really. That is truly not the case, sorry.
Steve-
“"Just a salad" - when you order just a salad, a guy will take this as a HUGE red flag! He will take it that you are not being yourself.”
I don’t know about that, I commonly order a chef’s salad, or grilled-chicken salad.
“One rule to keep in mind, whether you are on a date or not, is: NEVER, EVER send back your meal to be recooked.”
Agreed.
Our eldest son ‘Daniel’ does the McDonalds thing and has off and on for a while, he has accumulated over 2 years on their grills. He tells of things that others do during the ‘re-cook’ requests.
Never Never ever send food back.
Our stereo’s CD player holds up to 400 CDs, so it takes a while to cycle through the CDs in it [though it is not close to full]. I am reminded to 2 ‘oldie’ songs that come up every now and again.
One is saying to take out a rich man’s daughter and expect to pay a lot for dinner, take out a poor man’s daughter and any food will do. To which I would have to agree.
The other one says “make an ugly girl your wife”, the song it does however make a good solid case for it’s sentiment.
:-)
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Abigail
I would stay away from any heavily spiced food -especially onces containing onion or garlic, unless your date is eating a similar dish.
;)-->
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Zshot
Krys,
We all need a certain amount of maintaince.
For the sake of convience I will use 3 levels:
1. Standard:
Doesn't need allot frills, easy going. Down to earth menatalty. Orders straight off the menu. Doesn't require more than 30 min to get ready to go someplace (and this time includes a shower).
2. Above standard:
Likes a few frills, fairly easy going. Down to earth, for the most part. Orders off the menu with "extras" (sour cream, salad dressing, appitizers). Requires more time to get ready to go out, more makeup and more time on the hair.
3. High maintaince:
Loves the frills, demanding. Head in the clouds or up her @$$. Orders ala carte, with the "extras" and dessert. Takes over a hour to get ready to go out. everything has to be "perfect".
Of course this is just a vague and general description.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Steve!
What I mean by "just a salad" is:
when a woman says, "Oh, I'll just have a salad" - not meaning a chef's salad or a caesar salad, but a plain dinner salad.
This tells the guy that this girl is either continuously dieting, or ate beforehand, or is thinking about ditching you and meeting up with someone else.
Or it says that she's trying to show the guy that she's frugal or something.
Or has self-esteem issues.
If "just a salad" is ordered, it makes one think that that woman is pretty tense about something or other.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Zshot
Important note about being ditched...
Guys If you are ditched at a restaurant...
Get your butt out of the chair and leave her with the check.
Women tend to do the "dine, dump and dash"!
Don't let this happen to you!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Radar OReilly
Belle,
I want to talk about the *FIRST DATE* aspect.
If you are talking....you already have met the guy somewhere (work, the grocery, the gym, at a friends house, etc....) then just be yourself and follow your own gut rules about what kind of food you eat, and how you eat it. Can't go wrong with something healty and simple to eat like steak/chicken breast & salad.
If you are talking about BLIND FIRST DATE, you have never PHYSICALLY MET the man, then UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES HAVE A DINNER DATE FOR YOUR FIRST DATE. If you HATE HIM....you have to spend minimum of an hour with him, and one or both of you is stuck with a dinner tab.
If it is a BLIND first date, meet for lunch, or coffee and dessert at Starbucks or some where like that, perhaps somewhere open air with a patio.
My opinion on first dates....keep all your avenues of "possible escape" open.
MOST IMPORTANTLY......make sure you tell me if he is cute
;)-->
ror
OH YEAH, if you go on a first date with Zshot, just remember, to ask for salad dressing for your salad puts you in a higher category of *maintenance.
Z----you HAVE GOT TO GET OUT MORE!!!!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Cindy!
With a first date and eating habits....I have always gone by one solid rule.
If I have to be anyone other than who I am....the date is over before it begins.
MAJOR first date rule...be yourself.
If they don't like it....too bad, so sad, sucks to be them.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Linda Z
Sometimes women order just a salad because they aren't hungry. Sometimes a salad is just a salad.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
pawtucket
go to a lively city area with plenty of eateries and walk and taste. With both of you walking, you can make some mistakes
Link to comment
Share on other sites
vickles
One thing that I watch for in a date is if they send their food back and act too fussy. It completely turns me off. I would think it wouldn't look to good for a woman to do that either. Kinda makes the date uncomfortable.
If I was going on a first date I wouldn't order salad. They never cut the lettuce in itty bitty pieces and I sometimes get too much on the fork. Then I end up stuffing my face.
Finger foods are always good as long as it isn't messy.
Chicken is rather tedius since you have to use a fork...never use your hands....
:D-->
Hamburgers are always easy as long as you don't have too much on it. Don't have onions on it...
;)-->
When you go out for a meal always let him order first so you know what price range to go by.
End the date right away if he forgets his wallet and you end up paying for it...
-->
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Goey
Steve,
I don't know what kinda restaurants you managed, but in mine I want my customers to send back any food that is not cooked properly as in too bloody rare or too well done. And my customers know that I will make it right without spitting on the food.
And .... as a customer if I am gonna pay $40 bucks for a something like a steak, I expect it to be cooked the way I ordered it cooked. I have no qualms about politely having my order redone. I doubt that cooks mess with the food as much as you make out. I mean what is their motivation? - it's not their money.
Sure, there are rare occurances but it is the exception rather than the rule. You are more likely to get stuff from off the floor than intentionally sabotaged food.
Now food on the first date? Whats wrong with raw oysters or spaghetti? Guess Cajuns or Italians never go on first dates. The heck with Mrs Owens and her ettiquette - eat what you want and get it over with. Why put on pretenses?
BTW, Cowgirl and I had smoked oysters on our first date !
Link to comment
Share on other sites
dmiller
Belle -- did you already know the *prospective* date, or is it someone you haven't met yet? If it's someone you know, I wouldn't worry either. If it's someone you've never met, do like others here suggested -- go for a walk, and coffee.
Good luck!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Radar OReilly
Goey,
Have I told you lately that I love you
;)-->
Cowgirl....I am strictly in love with his MIND
;)-->
ror
GREAT ADVICE GOEY
Link to comment
Share on other sites
reikilady
Belle, have fun and go out for drinks or coffee, is my suggestion. It worked for Tom and I...Our first date lasted about 5 hours and he e-mailed the next day to say he had a nice time....Which I took as a very good sign that we enjoyed each other's company equally well.
I tend to let people know (friends) how much fun I had after the event because I think that is good manners.
High maintence or low maintenance...you either are "into" the person or your not....I take between 5 minutes to 40 minutes to get ready and the windows can be down in the car in the summer because my hair doesn't have to be perfect.
The truth is dating takes effort. It shouldn't feel like an obligation or a sentence to be served. If your really nervous around someone and it doesn't go away withing a date or two, I think that is a warning sign that they are not right for you.
I dated a guy that's ex-wife called him "Mr. Opionion" and I soon found out why. I could not relax around this person and felt like I HAD to make things PERFECT!!! Those days are gone.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
suz
What meaneth DATE???
no comprende'
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Cowgirl
........and that ain't all we had!!! (get your minds out of the gutter)
:)-->
Cowgirl
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Steve Swenton
Suz,
A "date" can be one of three things. One is a fruit from a certain palm tree. The second is a position on a calendar. They're not talking about those two "dates".
The third is a meeting, usually with romance implied, between a man and a woman. The reason it is called a "date" is because it is usually pre-scheduled for a certain day and time, like the date on a calendar.
Many things can be done on a date, go to the movies, play a game, go have dinner at a restaraunt, etc, etc.
Hope this helps...
Steve.
¥
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.