I was engaged, got engaged during my last year in rez. Was immediately sent to another campus, away from the beloved.
Then on graduation we went to another country. There was so much interference from the Area Coord and the Country Coord and nothing I did (or didn't do) was right in their eyes (whether I had actually done alleged thing or not; I was condemned repeatedly for a lot of things beloved did), and beloved was also under suspicion for not having me cowed and under his thumb, basically. When finally they flung me out most ignominiously, he went back to HQ and was received by Dorothy O with open arms. And I was M&A. For why? I followed an example set by my beloved!
My shiny new fiance is a very kind man, a devout Christian since his too-long-ago youth, strong supporter of his church and many worthy activities to help under-privileged and needy folk, generous with his time, money, and his heart, soul, mind and strength.
He was the Safeguarding officer at his church - that is, the person responsible to whom abuses of any kind within the church community are reported; and then he independently ensures that allegations are investigated and appropriate action taken. So no surprises at abuse by "spiritual overseers" in church settings, and learning of church ministers and leaders who've done wrong in this respect.
It would be some 11 years or so ago, when I felt safe talking to him about the abuses (many) that had happened to me, and he's been wonderfully patient and understanding over the time since then in helping me move to a very good place in my life now.
And I have helped him in overcoming his grief and loneliness by my "just being there" when his wife of nearly 50 years together (not all married), died of a nasty disease, before we met.
A good friendship has grown into = well, we get married on 6 September!
Recommended Posts
Twinky
I was engaged, got engaged during my last year in rez. Was immediately sent to another campus, away from the beloved.
Then on graduation we went to another country. There was so much interference from the Area Coord and the Country Coord and nothing I did (or didn't do) was right in their eyes (whether I had actually done alleged thing or not; I was condemned repeatedly for a lot of things beloved did), and beloved was also under suspicion for not having me cowed and under his thumb, basically. When finally they flung me out most ignominiously, he went back to HQ and was received by Dorothy O with open arms. And I was M&A. For why? I followed an example set by my beloved!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Twinky
My shiny new fiance is a very kind man, a devout Christian since his too-long-ago youth, strong supporter of his church and many worthy activities to help under-privileged and needy folk, generous with his time, money, and his heart, soul, mind and strength.
He was the Safeguarding officer at his church - that is, the person responsible to whom abuses of any kind within the church community are reported; and then he independently ensures that allegations are investigated and appropriate action taken. So no surprises at abuse by "spiritual overseers" in church settings, and learning of church ministers and leaders who've done wrong in this respect.
It would be some 11 years or so ago, when I felt safe talking to him about the abuses (many) that had happened to me, and he's been wonderfully patient and understanding over the time since then in helping me move to a very good place in my life now.
And I have helped him in overcoming his grief and loneliness by my "just being there" when his wife of nearly 50 years together (not all married), died of a nasty disease, before we met.
A good friendship has grown into = well, we get married on 6 September!
Link to comment
Share on other sites
waysider
Awesome!
I'm so happy for you.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.