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It's like death - only better


T-Bone
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Subject: toxic sales

What if harmful and controlling organizations had an open-cult concept – giving followers more space and being less confining. How would they sell that idea to the public? So what if a cult is destructive to one’s authentic self. Near death experiences often cause people to reflect on the meaning of life and what’s important.

I could picture the ad. A couple witnessing a mushroom cloud from afar. The voice over says Our Cult - devastating like death – only better...it conveys the subtle thought that one might survive a nuclear holocaust.

 

Our cult - devastating like death – only better

Because you can leave when you’re done or when we’re done with you - whichever comes first

Our Cult - the new and improved way to die – figuratively speaking of course

Just don’t literally die while you’re in our cult…then that would really suck…that’s no better than dying in a real prison.

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Edited by T-Bone
whichever whatever
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toxic sales # 067

advertisement by Ad Verse

 

Rome City Culture-Royale Obedience School for Dogs & Their Owners

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Popular curriculum:

Step-and-fetch-it Principle expounded

4 pets euthanized

Disciplines the pet owner to retrieve

Throwing and retrieving

Explains apparent pet lore contradictions

Develops more harmony in the crate

Increases pet activity

Raise your child to be an award-winning canine

 

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toxic sales # 2277

advertisement by We Can Sell Your Bull-$hit

Cornfused State Insurance

The only insurance company that does not charge premiums. Ever!

It’s time to take back control of your life. Never be caught off guard again.

For a minimum required donation you can take our classes that will teach you how to manage every thing in life. Even the unforeseen.

It’s Your Fault Insurance enables you to take responsibility for everything that happens. And don’t worry if a catastrophe happens after you take our foundational class. Mastering the secret to total power takes time – specifically time and money to re-take the foundational class again.  

 

It’s Your Fault Insurance – isn't it about time you take control of your world?

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