Typically, when we think of sexual grooming, we think of a situation or relationship that involves an adult and a child. Perhaps this is why people will sometimes be reluctant to acknowledge that what they were seeing in The Way was, in fact, sexual grooming, even though it was an adult/adult version.
First, he (VPW) set himself up as being trustworthy and authoritative. Then, he engaged in desensitizing techniques through his stories and physical contact. In addition, he swore his victims to secrecy and implied that dire consequences would ensue (and sometimes did) if they were to ever reveal "their little secret". Losing The Way is a book that offers first hand testimony of one of his victims. We have also heard first hand testimony from posters who were present at "women only" corps night-owls where Wierwille described to those present how he had fondled his own daughter to teach her a fatherly lesson in sexual awareness. We have no way to ascertain with certainty whether or not he ever actual carried out what he claimed to have done. We can be certain, however, that he did make these claims. There are several first hand witnesses who have posted here to that effect.
In retrospect, I can tell you, first hand, that during my time in FellowLaborers, I saw similar things take place. We were never supposed to talk about such things among ourselves or even to allow ourselves to think that something might be amiss. To do so would be considered "thinking evil of your brother" and a definite indication of un-renewed mind and spiritual weakness. Besides, there was always the remote possibility that you were simply misinterpreting the circumstances. Looking back, though, that was not the case.
Grooming - Grooming is the predatory act of maneuvering another individual into a position that makes them more isolated, dependent, likely to trust, and more vulnerable to abusive behavior.
Description:
Grooming is a insidious predatory tactic, utilized by abusers. Grooming is practiced by Narcissists, Antisocial predators, con-artists and sexual aggressors, who target and manipulate vulnerable people for exploitation.
Child grooming is the deliberate act of establishing an emotional bond with a child, to lower the child's resistance. Child grooming can result in the minor falling victim to physical, sexual and emotional abuse, or specifically, to manipulate children into participating in slave labor, prostitution, and/or the production of child pornography.
Adult grooming is correspondent to child grooming and applies to any situation where an adult is primed to allow him or herself to be exploited or abused. While it is a common assumption that grooming is only practiced on the very young, identical emotional and psychological processes are commonly used to abuse or exploit adults the elderly, and those with compromised mental facilities.
An predator will identify and engage a victim and work to gain the target’s trust, break down defenses, and manipulate the victim until they get whatever it is they are after. Overt attention, verbal seduction (flattery / ego stroking), recruitment, physical isolation, charm, gift-giving, normalizing, gaslighting, secrecy, and threats are all hallmarks of grooming.
Abusers who groom their victims often claim to have a special connection with the abused. The so- called connection might be emotional, intellectual, sexual, spiritual, or all of the above. This is often backed up by the predator echoing back part of the target's own background or story, altered to fit the groomer’s back-story, in order to confirm the connection.
In order to abuse or exploit another person without fear of discovery, a sexual predator or con artist will frequently condition their intended victim to keep secrets for them. When building this bond of trust, an abuser may share seemingly personal or private information, and then swear the victim to secrecy. The victim is made to believe that they are being trusted with something of value, before being asked to share something of value with his/her abuser.
Abusers use shared secrets to bind their victims to them. By degrees, the target is gradually lured in to revealing private information, giving up money, property or sexual favors, or permitting /engaging in inappropriate, unsafe, or illegal behaviors. • The victim is often drawn in to being a "co-conspirator” (also known as forced teaming) with his or her abuser.
Eventually, the bond of secrecy is nearly always reinforced with threats, shaming and guilt to keep the victim silent about his or her shared crimes or misdeeds.
First, he (VPW) set himself up as being trustworthy and authoritative. Then, he engaged in desensitizing techniques through his stories and physical contact. In addition, he swore his victims to secrecy and....
When I speak of *seduction*......the far greater implication, I reference, is that of spiritual seduction. Yes, a number of women were seduced into wierwille's bedroom, but a far greater number [women AND men] were seduced into his cult. The night-owl setting camouflaged this seductive arrangement towards wierwille's wheelhouse.
On a pristine evening, the night sky was aglow with twinkling stars and soft, fresh air. The fire crackled and the flames danced alluring all who entered the campfire area of an enchanting night-owl. Far removed from a podium and desks, sensations of pleasantry warmed one's soul with acceptance and delight. The seduction had already started before the cognitive mind could even grasp its stealthy entrance.
Who could resist its temptations? Who doesn't love a campfire?
Wierwille played his advantage well. Again, it was *staged* to entice.....using all the outdoor elements towards inward desires, into his cult. The select few that made their way to his bed, well, who could blame them for wanting to share of themselves with the mog? The others? Well.....they "were blessed" just to be in his presence and join in God's plan to move this word. See? This was spiritual stuff.....and that's why, the way woods was considered by vpw to be one of the top five holy places at the way international.
Clearly, there's a reason why the book of I John chapter 2, written to those born again, WARNS of two things: 1)Seduction and 2)No need for man (flesh, lust) to teach you . You should *abide* in the anointing and with it, you shall be taught. Sadly, and deceptively......few in the corps were abiding.
I agree, the sexual escapades were just the tip of the iceberg. His seduction went far beyond the mere physical implications. One needn't look too far to find people still psychologically mesmerized by his seductive skills.
edit: When I say "mere physical implications", I don't mean that in any way that might minimize the seriousness of that aspect.
You want to know what really reflects the inner heart mindset of those men regarding seduction? The motorcycle shed on Wierwille property, where VP would hang out with "the guys" - there's a small comic on the wall. (may still be there if the fox hasn't whitewashed it). A picture of two insects copulating, and a caption under it that read "flea fornication". Just one small relic, an indicator of an attitude. That attitude was mocking scripture and living fulfilling their own selfish needs in a category. Saying they served God, but in reality serving their own belly.
You want to know what really reflects the inner heart mindset of those men regarding seduction? The motorcycle shed on Wierwille property, where VP would hang out with "the guys" - there's a small comic on the wall. (may still be there if the fox hasn't whitewashed it). A picture of two insects copulating, and a caption under it that read "flea fornication". Just one small relic, an indicator of an attitude. That attitude was mocking scripture and living fulfilling their own selfish needs in a category. Saying they served God, but in reality serving their own belly.
yup
--
night owls more like night crawlers
when he "got" me on the coach it was a ride through the night
when he took my college wow sisters out to the "pheasant" HUNTING grounds, it was in the dead of night
ohmygoodness, does anything profitable happen after midnight?
I noticed that as well. Here's another story, this one from an investigating group (the same one that was just fired yesterday from conducting an internal investigation at Bob Jones University)
I noticed that as well. Here's another story, this one from an investigating group (the same one that was just fired yesterday from conducting an internal investigation at Bob Jones University)
they call any publicity, a Gift from God.. yeah. any publicity is better than no publicity..
so sad. I received a gift from one of these organizations after raising sufficient hell about them here.. a shattered coffee mug with a shattered inscription. .. ordinarily given to contributors. They only shattered themselves..
If you want to send any more broken contributions, my address is still the same.
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waysider
Typically, when we think of sexual grooming, we think of a situation or relationship that involves an adult and a child. Perhaps this is why people will sometimes be reluctant to acknowledge that what they were seeing in The Way was, in fact, sexual grooming, even though it was an adult/adult version.
First, he (VPW) set himself up as being trustworthy and authoritative. Then, he engaged in desensitizing techniques through his stories and physical contact. In addition, he swore his victims to secrecy and implied that dire consequences would ensue (and sometimes did) if they were to ever reveal "their little secret". Losing The Way is a book that offers first hand testimony of one of his victims. We have also heard first hand testimony from posters who were present at "women only" corps night-owls where Wierwille described to those present how he had fondled his own daughter to teach her a fatherly lesson in sexual awareness. We have no way to ascertain with certainty whether or not he ever actual carried out what he claimed to have done. We can be certain, however, that he did make these claims. There are several first hand witnesses who have posted here to that effect.
In retrospect, I can tell you, first hand, that during my time in FellowLaborers, I saw similar things take place. We were never supposed to talk about such things among ourselves or even to allow ourselves to think that something might be amiss. To do so would be considered "thinking evil of your brother" and a definite indication of un-renewed mind and spiritual weakness. Besides, there was always the remote possibility that you were simply misinterpreting the circumstances. Looking back, though, that was not the case.
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WordWolf
When in those closed groups, vpw sometimes mentioned that our modern society
was hung up on sexual mores and compared it negatively to some
(apparently imaginary) African tribes where the father iniated his daughters
into intimate relations. Curiously, NOBODY can find such a reference
ANYWHERE, even a FICTIONAL one other than in vpw's comments.
It remains especially curious for a group supposedly modeled after the
Christians of the first-century AD to completely discard the morals of
those Christians when in private- vpw was de facto condemning their
morals when he said this. In fact, because he freely quoted in public
verses about sexual relations belonging only in marriage and solely between
that husband and wife, it was more than confusing to many people to hear
he was saying the opposite in private and urging them to keep that
information in their "lockbox."
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waysider
Definition:
Grooming - Grooming is the predatory act of maneuvering another individual into a position that makes them more isolated, dependent, likely to trust, and more vulnerable to abusive behavior.
Description:
Grooming is a insidious predatory tactic, utilized by abusers. Grooming is practiced by Narcissists, Antisocial predators, con-artists and sexual aggressors, who target and manipulate vulnerable people for exploitation.
Child grooming is the deliberate act of establishing an emotional bond with a child, to lower the child's resistance. Child grooming can result in the minor falling victim to physical, sexual and emotional abuse, or specifically, to manipulate children into participating in slave labor, prostitution, and/or the production of child pornography.
Adult grooming is correspondent to child grooming and applies to any situation where an adult is primed to allow him or herself to be exploited or abused. While it is a common assumption that grooming is only practiced on the very young, identical emotional and psychological processes are commonly used to abuse or exploit adults the elderly, and those with compromised mental facilities.
An predator will identify and engage a victim and work to gain the target’s trust, break down defenses, and manipulate the victim until they get whatever it is they are after. Overt attention, verbal seduction (flattery / ego stroking), recruitment, physical isolation, charm, gift-giving, normalizing, gaslighting, secrecy, and threats are all hallmarks of grooming.
Abusers who groom their victims often claim to have a special connection with the abused. The so- called connection might be emotional, intellectual, sexual, spiritual, or all of the above. This is often backed up by the predator echoing back part of the target's own background or story, altered to fit the groomer’s back-story, in order to confirm the connection.
In order to abuse or exploit another person without fear of discovery, a sexual predator or con artist will frequently condition their intended victim to keep secrets for them. When building this bond of trust, an abuser may share seemingly personal or private information, and then swear the victim to secrecy. The victim is made to believe that they are being trusted with something of value, before being asked to share something of value with his/her abuser.
Abusers use shared secrets to bind their victims to them. By degrees, the target is gradually lured in to revealing private information, giving up money, property or sexual favors, or permitting /engaging in inappropriate, unsafe, or illegal behaviors. • The victim is often drawn in to being a "co-conspirator” (also known as forced teaming) with his or her abuser.
Eventually, the bond of secrecy is nearly always reinforced with threats, shaming and guilt to keep the victim silent about his or her shared crimes or misdeeds.
SOURCE
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skyrider
When I speak of *seduction*......the far greater implication, I reference, is that of spiritual seduction. Yes, a number of women were seduced into wierwille's bedroom, but a far greater number [women AND men] were seduced into his cult. The night-owl setting camouflaged this seductive arrangement towards wierwille's wheelhouse.
On a pristine evening, the night sky was aglow with twinkling stars and soft, fresh air. The fire crackled and the flames danced alluring all who entered the campfire area of an enchanting night-owl. Far removed from a podium and desks, sensations of pleasantry warmed one's soul with acceptance and delight. The seduction had already started before the cognitive mind could even grasp its stealthy entrance.
Who could resist its temptations? Who doesn't love a campfire?
Wierwille played his advantage well. Again, it was *staged* to entice.....using all the outdoor elements towards inward desires, into his cult. The select few that made their way to his bed, well, who could blame them for wanting to share of themselves with the mog? The others? Well.....they "were blessed" just to be in his presence and join in God's plan to move this word. See? This was spiritual stuff.....and that's why, the way woods was considered by vpw to be one of the top five holy places at the way international.
Clearly, there's a reason why the book of I John chapter 2, written to those born again, WARNS of two things: 1)Seduction and 2)No need for man (flesh, lust) to teach you . You should *abide* in the anointing and with it, you shall be taught. Sadly, and deceptively......few in the corps were abiding.
.
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waysider
I agree, the sexual escapades were just the tip of the iceberg. His seduction went far beyond the mere physical implications. One needn't look too far to find people still psychologically mesmerized by his seductive skills.
edit: When I say "mere physical implications", I don't mean that in any way that might minimize the seriousness of that aspect.
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skyrider
My book would be entitled EX-posing The Way.
Green to depict wierwille's twi and its double-meaning of "the emerald city of oz."
Yellow-gold to depict the enticing way in.....and the golden truth of getting out.
Wonder if anyone would ever buy it?
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chockfull
You want to know what really reflects the inner heart mindset of those men regarding seduction? The motorcycle shed on Wierwille property, where VP would hang out with "the guys" - there's a small comic on the wall. (may still be there if the fox hasn't whitewashed it). A picture of two insects copulating, and a caption under it that read "flea fornication". Just one small relic, an indicator of an attitude. That attitude was mocking scripture and living fulfilling their own selfish needs in a category. Saying they served God, but in reality serving their own belly.
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Rocky
That's not necessarily why writers write.
Would it be a worldwide best selller? Probably not. Is there a niche market of people who need to know your story?
I'd bet the answer to that is yes.
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skyrider
Thanks, Rocky.
Sometimes, I think that my story would be of little interest.....farm kid, sports, college,
twi, corps, deprogramming, time spent with vpw, clergy, country coordinator, limb coordinator,
times with martindale, major events escorting mrs. wierwille, sudden exit...
Then I stop and think......there is SO MUCH that I've never written at GS.
.
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excathedra
yup
--
night owls more like night crawlers
when he "got" me on the coach it was a ride through the night
when he took my college wow sisters out to the "pheasant" HUNTING grounds, it was in the dead of night
ohmygoodness, does anything profitable happen after midnight?
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Yanagisawa
This just published regarding Bill Gothard, another kindly spiritual leader
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/lovejoyfeminism/2014/02/bill-gothard-sexual-predator.html
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skyrider
In reading all 4 accounts......Lizzie's, Annette's, Grace's, and Charlotte's
here is what stood out to me:
1) Incremental steps to cross boundary lines
2) Ever-so-subtle gauging of young girls' body language
3) My parents became involved in the seminars in the early 1970s
4) Inappropriate touching, grooming, etc.
AND
5) My story is that I was brought to HQ
HQ? You know....that all-encompassing awe-struck pinnacle of the infallible.
.
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Yanagisawa
I noticed that as well. Here's another story, this one from an investigating group (the same one that was just fired yesterday from conducting an internal investigation at Bob Jones University)
http://www.recoveringgrace.org/2014/02/the-gothard-files-a-case-for-disqualification-x2/
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skyrider
Thanks, Yana.....for posting this.
From article:
"Whereas Bill Gothard has exhibited a 40-year pattern of moral failure,
abuse of spiritual authority, and mishandling of Scripture, and is therefore
disqualified from Christian ministry according to Titus 1 and I Timothy 3,
we believe that the only biblical course of action is for Bill Gothard to step down
from all ministry and leadership positions, publicly repent of the above sins,
and exhibit fruit in keeping with repentance (Matt. 3:8)."
If there HAD BEEN true ministers serving in twi, then this DISQUALIFICATION OF
VICTOR PAUL WIERWILLE would have put twi-followers on notice in 1982.
And the article concludes:
....."But for the sake of our younger brothers and sisters in Christ who are still in danger,
we refuse to look the other way and allow the abuse to continue."
And thus, GreaseSpot stays relevant by speaking of twi's danger.
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Ham
I would like to know what the "church" has to say about sowers, stiffi.. cff.. crf.. et al.. in years to come..
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Ham
they call any publicity, a Gift from God.. yeah. any publicity is better than no publicity..
so sad. I received a gift from one of these organizations after raising sufficient hell about them here.. a shattered coffee mug with a shattered inscription. .. ordinarily given to contributors. They only shattered themselves..
If you want to send any more broken contributions, my address is still the same.
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