What is the best way to get someone out of The Way? Or how did you get out?

[Naten00]

I have been in discussions with people on what the best way to reach someone in The Way is? Any ideas?

[OldSkool]

I have been in discussions with people on what the best way to reach someone in The Way is? Any ideas?

I really don't know. There are so many reasons why people stay. Personally, I would not argue with the person. If they are willing to talk that's cool but any arguing with a true wayfer will result in them thinking you are possessed.

I left because I refuse to be treated the way the board of dummies tried to treat me. Once I saw TWI was rotten to the core I bounced.

[chockfull]

I have been in discussions with people on what the best way to reach someone in The Way is? Any ideas?

[Keith]

I know this might be hard to believe, but I had a list of friends that I want to see leave TWI. I spent type praying for them and just asking God to open their eyes. Out of at least about 16 people all but one left within two years. Of those all but one appologized to me for some of the things they had said to me.

[Twinky]

They won't leave till they're ready and the more you try to persuade them, the more they will think you are possessed. it's a trick of the adversary, etc.

Maybe the question(s) to ask of - or about - them is, Why do they stay? What do they get out of it? What's the emotional hold on them (on them as individuals - not the "fear factor")?

There are other threads on this, on how to help people - and also how to help them once they are out.

[GeorgeStGeorge]

I got kicked out because I wouldn't stop questioning things. Maybe you can get your friends to question a few precepts and see what happens when they try to get "answers" from their leadership. It won't be pretty, and their feelings will probably get hurt, but better to see what the "heart of the ministry" really is.

George

Edited September 7, 2011 by GeorgeStGeorge

[JavaJane]

I know for me the more pressure I got to get out the more I felt I needed to stay, and the more i needed to cut off contact withe the ones telling me to leave. To the point I didn't talk to my family for five years. I had to see it for myself.

So, best thing you can do is pray, if you pray.

Remember, they taught in the Foundational Class that the first step down is QUESTIONING.

[OldSkool]

Remember, they taught in the Foundational Class that the first step down is QUESTIONING.

Aint that a b1tch? I thought the whole point of a "research" ministry was to answer questions. Guess they only questions they answer are the ones they give you followed by their answers.

[WordWolf]

Aint that a b1tch? I thought the whole point of a "research" ministry was to answer questions. Guess they only questions they answer are the ones they give you followed by their answers.

Bingo.

[waysider]

I just quietly drifted out to sea. No one seemed to notice I was gone. I had to adjust my thinking, however, to accept two key points. First, that the devil wasn't going to snuff out me or my loved ones for leaving what I later came to realize was nothing more than a cult. Second, that I wasn't required to give my money to TWI or any other religious organization to ensure my safety and health.

Edited September 8, 2011 by waysider

[skyrider]

Aint that a b1tch? I thought the whole point of a "research" ministry was to answer questions. Guess they only questions they answer are the ones they give you followed by their answers.

That ole bait-n-switch routine is twi's m.o.

Seen it done too many times to count.

[nandon]

Just be nice to them, and when instances in conversation arise, speak logically and honestly to them.

[penworks]

Well, I'm inclined to agree with Karen Armstrong when she says of fundamentalism that we can't get the genie back in the bottle. It's here to stay. What we can do is try to prevent the fundies from becoming more extreme and harming others. With Wayfers, their thinking is already extreme. With its dogmas and behaviors, harm is done emotionally, spiritually, and mentally and sometimes physically. What we can do is prevent others from getting seduced into TWI and groups like it. Keep posting here!! And anywhere we can.

Check this out: The Fundamentalists

Cheers!

Pen

[socks]

"what-is-the-best-way-to-get-someone-out-of-the-way-or-how-did-you-get-out"

I left

[Bramble]

We visited my family, and the contrast with their kindness and joy at seeing us and our kids really showed the dour, nasty way we were treated by our leadership. We also relaxed for the first time in a long time, then returned to the stress and tenseness of TWI life.

Maybe look for ways to show kindness and delight in being with them, not trying to change them to fit a mold. help them relax. TWI talks a lot about hospitality--but what they mean by that is having a show place to show off in. It is all about the perfection of the hosts, not the pleasure of the guests.

[chockfull]

The levels of abuse from all fronts reached a high enough level I prayed to God for the abuse to stop. The answer to prayer was a clear path to leave TWI. The abuse stopped as there was no more contact with the abusers.

Edited September 11, 2011 by chockfull

[geisha779]

Just be nice to them, and when instances in conversation arise, speak logically and honestly to them.

This seems a really great way to me. Lovely!

I would just add that when speaking to someone in TWI .... remember that they don't have healthy boundaries or healthy relationships in their lives......those things are among the first to go... if they ever had them at all. Be careful not to get sucked back into that world of confusion. I don't think trying to relate or engage them in their reality is really going to help. Like Nandon said, just be nice, honest, and logical if conversation does ever arise.

[JavaJane]

It reminds me of the old saying, "the best revenge I'd living well."

Not that you want revenge on the people you want to leave, but if they see that you are happier and better off without TWI, it might help them wake up.

Then again it may just not compute.

[WordWolf]

It reminds me of the old saying, "the best revenge I'd living well."

Not that you want revenge on the people you want to leave, but if they see that you are happier and better off without TWI, it might help them wake up.

Then again it may just not compute.

Heh.

Put that together with some of the more obvious examples of how twi contradicts Scripture, and even the most

diehard kool-aid drinker will have to admit he's suppressing his thinking processes in order to stay in.

[Keith]

Can't remember if I ever told how I got out. It was early on.... the first time around the late 70's. I hosted, but didn't run a twig at my appartment. The leader kept calling people and telling them they we were going out witnessing or something like that. He would call everyone but me. So there I was, with the chairs set up, and nobody came. Happened almost every other week. I guess finally they just moved the twig and never told me. So I just stayed home, and never told them.

I did go back for a while in '90. Was appalled at what I saw and heard and left again after several months. But not before firing of a letter to Craig about how they had lost the love they used to have. God Bless you had become a greeting without out feeling. And they had become the denomination they said they never were. Of course I expected something closer to the what I saw in the 70's. My first trip back was to HQ, where I sat in the front row of the Auditorium, dressed in blue jeans and a T-shirt. Feeling very out of place.

I guess I owe the the Corps appology. I hear he read part of the that letter to them and reamed them out pretty good for being un-loving.

I can't believe I stayed several months after that, When I left they spent quite a while trying to get me to stay even though I complained loudly about the quality of the teachings and what was being taught. Weird.

[waysider]

Can't remember if I ever told how I got out. It was early on.... the first time around the late 70's. I hosted, but didn't run a twig at my appartment. The leader kept calling people and telling them they we were going out witnessing or something like that. He would call everyone but me. So there I was, with the chairs set up, and nobody came. Happened almost every other week. I guess finally they just moved the twig and never told me. So I just stayed home, and never told them.

I did go back for a while in '90. Was appalled at what I saw and heard and left again after several months. But not before firing of a letter to Craig about how they had lost the love they used to have. God Bless you had become a greeting without out feeling. And they had become the denomination they said they never were. Of course I expected something closer to the what I saw in the 70's. My first trip back was to HQ, where I sat in the front row of the Auditorium, dressed in blue jeans and a T-shirt. Feeling very out of place.

I guess I owe the the Corps appology. I hear he read part of the that letter to them and reamed them out pretty good for being un-loving.

I can't believe I stayed several months after that, When I left they spent quite a while trying to get me to stay even though I complained loudly about the quality of the teachings and what was being taught. Weird.

This reminds me of an old adage.

Q. What does your boss ask you on your last day that he should have asked on your first day?

A. "What will it take to keep you?"

Edited September 13, 2011 by waysider

[allswellhere99]

"If I got you into TWI or coaxed you into The Way Corps, I regret it and apologize for being a part of TWI propagandizing." from one of the posters. Thank you for that statement. I've wondered all these years why those who are in the Way don't feel some type of guilt or regret for sucking others into this sick organization ... sucking their money away from them and cutting them off from the world and their family. It is shameful. It is sickening. It is sinful.