I agree, NewLife... although I never went WOW or lived in a WayHome, I did have situations where I was expected to share an apartment or house with other believers "just because the leadership thought it was a good idea". You really didn't feel like you could say "no"... somehow that was questioning God's open door for your life. HAH.
Looking back, there were some advantages but usually there were far more disadvantages. And why is it that sharing my living space with the latest "newbie" was good for my life but NEVER good for the local leaderships' lives? (hmmmm)
But you know, we DID think we would get blessed by giving, especially if it was inconvenient. We were pushing ourselves to be better for God (or so we thought) -- we were putting away selfishness and casting off the old man. I remember cheerfully scrubbing toilets or hauling yard trash around other peoples' yards on the weekends.
I guess it isn't really the work I regret... it was good, honest work (at least on my part) -- it's the morally bankrupt people I did it for that I am sorry about.
Hmmm well I had good and bad experiences with it.. mine were mostly good but that is because any of the coordinators of the ones I was in were very laid back. I think the biggest fight I ever saw was over the phone bill. IT was like any time in TWI really dependent on who you had in the house with you and who was leadership in your area.
Any time you live with other people there will be problems... the thing that made wayhomes so hard is people moved in expecting every thing to be all wonderful but life really isn't like that at all. To top it off or to add to the pressure.. some of them took away all your freedom...
so it beccame an oblligation and not a joy.
TWI really messed up so much of what our walk with God should really be all about.
I did experience the communal lifestyle, though, as a participant of Fellow Laborers of Ohio. (a two year, in-res., leadership training program)
It wasn't a particularly rewarding experience. One thing that made it especially bad was that we often ignored good old common sense and tried to "believe" for things to work out for the best. They seldom did. At least, not because of any magic "believing power" we exercised. We were young and naive. There were some good times sprinkled in. But, for the most part, it was a waste of precious time. Lots of good people were damaged in the process.
And no, you couldn't trust people. I was in FLO when Waysider was. One girl a year ahead of me in the program asked, begged actually to borrow two turquoise and silver bracelets to wear one time. They were courting gifts, if you will, from my dad to my mom when they were dating. So she keeps them two weeks, despite my pleas for their return, until one day I notice she has them locked up in her car! I marched her outside and told her if she didn't hand them over immediately I would tell the limb leader, or call VPW or break her car window and take them. She was of course all huffy about it, after all, weren't we sisters and weren't we supposed to have all things common?
Not those bracelets, bozo.
The whole idea of communal living seemed to me that in many cases it was the have-notes, people too lazy or uneducated to go get a damn regular job, like Waysider and I did, living off those who had jobs and worked our butts off to keep the wheels spinning round and round. There weren't many of them, but the ones that did were experts at working the "sisters in Christ" and "all things common" business until they would guilt you out of your gold teeth fillings.
I saw this on the WOW field too, but not to such a great extent. My WOW sister was on her interim year in the 4th Corps and got a check every month from her spiritual partnership money. This was for her to use to help support herself on the field. She wouldn't use a dime of it to help with food, rent, transportation, anything. She always had nice clothes though. Then when I got some extra money in from a retirement fund in the state where I had worked, guess who wanted to go out to dinner on my dime?
The WOW's who came to the state where I lived before I went WOW stole a bunch of furniture I had left with my former roommate, and they were freakin' interim WC!
I realize I come across as a materialistic bytch. I'm sorry. This is America. I'm happy to share, but not so that someone else can sit on her butt and mooch.
We had to commute between Limb HQ, in "South Podunk", and the living quarters in "North Podunk", which was a 30 minute trip through the countryside. By "Podunk", I mean they were both in the middle of NOWHERE. If you had a car, you were expected to freely provide it for the benefit of the program. One guy had a 9 passenger van. Do you really think very many ever offered him gas money or gave him a few bucks for a new set of tires? He was a very laid back, tolerant guy, but I know it weighed on him after awhile. When I think about the few good times that we had, my friendship with him comes instantly to mind.
I realize I come across as a materialistic bytch. I'm sorry. This is America. I'm happy to share, but not so that someone else can sit on her butt and mooch.
Not at all. You have the same values I have. And the same values my family and friends have. I'm also happy to give and to share, but on my terms.
I got to thinking about Way Homes. I remember the thing about if you are a believer, you shouldn't live alone. It was suppose to be a real loving home with fun and healing etc etc.
What were your Way Home experiences like?? Just something I was thinking about.
I was in one Way home, and one only. Chr!s Gr@nlich was in charge of it. Nuff said.
I got to thinking about Way Homes. I remember the thing about if you are a believer, you shouldn't live alone. It was suppose to be a real loving home with fun and healing etc etc. Wasn't what I thought at all. I went through a history of living with people in Way Homes. People I never met before, people I had no idea could I trust them, or what kinds of problems did they have? Was I safe. No thought given to it at all....just move in and start living together as a "family". It seemed like it was suppose to be instant happening, a family. My experience with that was not good most of the time. We had a coordinator who actually kind of dictated things, no discussion, no interaction. And it really took away my individuality. Seemed like we had to, were expected to, do whatever the house was gonna do, whether it be a movie, witnessing, etc etc. Maybe had one day what they called "off" to do your laundry and do what you wanted. But mostly we were to act as a happy, loving household. Not to say, I didn't have good moments, but that was just it, Moments. Sometimes Fleeting! I didn't enjoy any of it as I look back on it. Can't believe I just moved in with anyone, anywhere. Expectations seems high from the coordinators. And of course there was always to pressure of getting a class together, or working at the limb headquarters EVERY Sat it seemed and look at it as some great honor to do that.
I have lived alone for quite awhile now. I was really tired of living with people when I left TWI. And have lived alone since And loved it. Time for me, time to think, time to do what interests me....And why did they say it wasn't good to live alone??
What were your Way Home experiences like?? Just something I was thinking about.
I went out way disciple and lived with a married couple and another gentlemen (don't know if that counts as a way home).The way home was the worst thing about the way disciple experience.The married couple were apprentice corpse and had some major issues,they continually made false accusations directed at my roomate and I,they wanted to run the house as if a dictatorship,always wanting to be in control.I honestly cannot believe they were even allowed in the corpse program,but knowing what I know now it does not take much to get in the corpse program.They were also pretty lazy,they actually yelled at my roomate and I for not waking them up in the morning because the could not get their own dead a$$@s out of bed.My roomate on the other hand was and is an awesome guy,a friend for life and probably one of the main reasons I got through living in the way home.Anyway hope that helps.
In the first one, the coordinator was a heavy drinker who pretended that he had a job that he went to each day. He was also the Way Home treasurer, which meant that all the rent and utility money went to pay for his drinking. We discovered what he was doing when one of the other ay Home inmates was home sick from work and found that the phone was dead. She went to the corner pay phone, called the phone company and found that we had been cut off for non-payment. Same with heating oil, electricity and rent. We confronted him on it. He swore he'd get a job and pay it all back, so we gave him a second chance, but got the leadership to remove him as coordinator. He paid us back with rubber checks so we threw him out and got yelled at by leadership for being unloving and for making decisions without checking with them first.
Mid-year I moved into another Way Home where the coordinator there was also a heavy drinker, albeit not the treasurer, and he actually had a job. He was verbally abusive and had several coercive sexual encounters with women in the twig.
WOW year 1980-81 the coordinator wasn't a heavy drinker, but hit on both WOW sisters and any other woman who got near him. His "job" was to put in a lawn at our rented home, for which the landlord would let him deduct money from the rent. He slept in every daty and killed the lawn. The landlord naturally wanted to be paid back, but the rent deductions had gone into the coordinator's pockets as his salary, so in effect the other 3 of us paid for him to live. Coordinator couldn't find a job for a while after that, so the 3 of us continued to support him. Eventually his father lent us some money to pay the rent. When we paid him back at the end of the year his dad gave the money to our coordinator, so we got screwed again.
I was also in a couple of Way Homes in 1981-82 that were a lot better in that nobody was drinking the rent money, stealing from us or trying to screw everything that moved (figureatively or literally.
Way disciple is one of those things where years later you're walking along and you suddenly get a chill and stop in your tracks. Your arm starts to twitch and your head vibrates as it cocks to one side. You then realize something like terror.
Then your spouse shakes you out of it. You tell her of a Way D incident you just remembered and suddenly she begins to twitch and stare off into space . . .
WayHomes? Hmm...where to start. First, amazingly, there was a LOT of good that came from living in one. But a LOT of crap too. Let's see if my brain will allow me to remember...
First roommate turned out to be gay. Nice. Oh, and very gay. Bought a water bed. Told TC he was gay and was told I was crazy. Later learned why they SUCH good friends. No wonder he covered for him. Guess his brilliant "overseers" in the corpse missed the whole attraction to men thing.
Second roommate was a girl. Yep. Awkward. Very awkward. Same level of hormonal control as roommate #1.
Third roommate was a guy who also wanted his own bed. Yes!!! Thank goodness! No more sleeping with one eye open.
Fourth and fifth roommates shared the basement. Very cool and very normal. Life was great!!! Oh and both had cars that worked so no more scamming off of me all the time. Both went WOW. Afraid to see what comes next...
Another female. Sort of. Fifth roommate wasn't one so much as a corpse grad looking for a husband. Practically moved in. Lots of "chatting" to see who was future corpse material. Must. Run. Fast. Now...
Learned many useful things including how to select better roommates.
Just my 2 cents… The concept of the Way Home is another concept stolen from somewhere else. I doubt that VPW got any revelation in starting the Way Home program. In my opinion, VPW stole this idea from the House of Acts in San Francisco area. The House of Acts had its own questionable moral issues as well. Mostly the same issued discussed here. You would think a mature man of God like VPW would have gleaned from the better aspects of it and purged the bad. Or at least warned people of problems that can arise. But apparently VPW benefited from the bad so why purge it. I guess he was not the man of God he claimed to be.
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Ham
Must have been a nightmare, for whoever signed the lease.
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TheHighWay
I agree, NewLife... although I never went WOW or lived in a WayHome, I did have situations where I was expected to share an apartment or house with other believers "just because the leadership thought it was a good idea". You really didn't feel like you could say "no"... somehow that was questioning God's open door for your life. HAH.
Looking back, there were some advantages but usually there were far more disadvantages. And why is it that sharing my living space with the latest "newbie" was good for my life but NEVER good for the local leaderships' lives? (hmmmm)
But you know, we DID think we would get blessed by giving, especially if it was inconvenient. We were pushing ourselves to be better for God (or so we thought) -- we were putting away selfishness and casting off the old man. I remember cheerfully scrubbing toilets or hauling yard trash around other peoples' yards on the weekends.
I guess it isn't really the work I regret... it was good, honest work (at least on my part) -- it's the morally bankrupt people I did it for that I am sorry about.
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leafytwiglet
Hmmm well I had good and bad experiences with it.. mine were mostly good but that is because any of the coordinators of the ones I was in were very laid back. I think the biggest fight I ever saw was over the phone bill. IT was like any time in TWI really dependent on who you had in the house with you and who was leadership in your area.
Any time you live with other people there will be problems... the thing that made wayhomes so hard is people moved in expecting every thing to be all wonderful but life really isn't like that at all. To top it off or to add to the pressure.. some of them took away all your freedom...
so it beccame an oblligation and not a joy.
TWI really messed up so much of what our walk with God should really be all about.
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waysider
I was never in a Way Home.
I did experience the communal lifestyle, though, as a participant of Fellow Laborers of Ohio. (a two year, in-res., leadership training program)
It wasn't a particularly rewarding experience. One thing that made it especially bad was that we often ignored good old common sense and tried to "believe" for things to work out for the best. They seldom did. At least, not because of any magic "believing power" we exercised. We were young and naive. There were some good times sprinkled in. But, for the most part, it was a waste of precious time. Lots of good people were damaged in the process.
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Watered Garden
And no, you couldn't trust people. I was in FLO when Waysider was. One girl a year ahead of me in the program asked, begged actually to borrow two turquoise and silver bracelets to wear one time. They were courting gifts, if you will, from my dad to my mom when they were dating. So she keeps them two weeks, despite my pleas for their return, until one day I notice she has them locked up in her car! I marched her outside and told her if she didn't hand them over immediately I would tell the limb leader, or call VPW or break her car window and take them. She was of course all huffy about it, after all, weren't we sisters and weren't we supposed to have all things common?
Not those bracelets, bozo.
The whole idea of communal living seemed to me that in many cases it was the have-notes, people too lazy or uneducated to go get a damn regular job, like Waysider and I did, living off those who had jobs and worked our butts off to keep the wheels spinning round and round. There weren't many of them, but the ones that did were experts at working the "sisters in Christ" and "all things common" business until they would guilt you out of your gold teeth fillings.
I saw this on the WOW field too, but not to such a great extent. My WOW sister was on her interim year in the 4th Corps and got a check every month from her spiritual partnership money. This was for her to use to help support herself on the field. She wouldn't use a dime of it to help with food, rent, transportation, anything. She always had nice clothes though. Then when I got some extra money in from a retirement fund in the state where I had worked, guess who wanted to go out to dinner on my dime?
The WOW's who came to the state where I lived before I went WOW stole a bunch of furniture I had left with my former roommate, and they were freakin' interim WC!
I realize I come across as a materialistic bytch. I'm sorry. This is America. I'm happy to share, but not so that someone else can sit on her butt and mooch.
WG
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waysider
And then there was the whole car thing.
We had to commute between Limb HQ, in "South Podunk", and the living quarters in "North Podunk", which was a 30 minute trip through the countryside. By "Podunk", I mean they were both in the middle of NOWHERE. If you had a car, you were expected to freely provide it for the benefit of the program. One guy had a 9 passenger van. Do you really think very many ever offered him gas money or gave him a few bucks for a new set of tires? He was a very laid back, tolerant guy, but I know it weighed on him after awhile. When I think about the few good times that we had, my friendship with him comes instantly to mind.
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Watered Garden
Definitely good troop there.
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Jim
Not at all. You have the same values I have. And the same values my family and friends have. I'm also happy to give and to share, but on my terms.
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dmiller
I was in one Way home, and one only. Chr!s Gr@nlich was in charge of it. Nuff said.
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mudflaps
I went out way disciple and lived with a married couple and another gentlemen (don't know if that counts as a way home).The way home was the worst thing about the way disciple experience.The married couple were apprentice corpse and had some major issues,they continually made false accusations directed at my roomate and I,they wanted to run the house as if a dictatorship,always wanting to be in control.I honestly cannot believe they were even allowed in the corpse program,but knowing what I know now it does not take much to get in the corpse program.They were also pretty lazy,they actually yelled at my roomate and I for not waking them up in the morning because the could not get their own dead a$$@s out of bed.My roomate on the other hand was and is an awesome guy,a friend for life and probably one of the main reasons I got through living in the way home.Anyway hope that helps.
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copenhagen
I have been a way disicilpe and lived in a way home hated them both.
The sell is the family gig and who better to live with belivers, you can save money
live less and serve more. You will be surounded by love and the word.
Oh yea you good credit will you sign the lease.
Next thing I know people are trying to run my life and tell
me what to do.
The truth you get people with bad hygene bad habbits and sticky fingers.
They want to use your car or get a ride and never kick in for gas.
The truth is it turns in to a messed up family where people take advantage
of each other and have no respect for others or there stuff.
I was in a hell home left for a few months,went way dis to come back,
my tv, vcr and surround sound were set up in the new way home. My couch and tables and
dining room set were in a fellowship cords home. Washer and dryer were in the new way corp
home. My truck had a bad water pump a dent and bald tires. All things were placed in
a safe home with a wonderful gal who got the boot because she would not make her son take the
wonder class.She got tossed and my stuff got stolen. Not to mention the personal effects that were missing.
It was an act of congress to get my stuff back from these people. It was my stuff.
The way is and always was a scam. you are a theif or being stolen from.
Just hide it in the name of God.
copenhagen
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Oakspear
I was in a couple of Way Homes in 1979-80.
In the first one, the coordinator was a heavy drinker who pretended that he had a job that he went to each day. He was also the Way Home treasurer, which meant that all the rent and utility money went to pay for his drinking. We discovered what he was doing when one of the other ay Home inmates was home sick from work and found that the phone was dead. She went to the corner pay phone, called the phone company and found that we had been cut off for non-payment. Same with heating oil, electricity and rent. We confronted him on it. He swore he'd get a job and pay it all back, so we gave him a second chance, but got the leadership to remove him as coordinator. He paid us back with rubber checks so we threw him out and got yelled at by leadership for being unloving and for making decisions without checking with them first.
Mid-year I moved into another Way Home where the coordinator there was also a heavy drinker, albeit not the treasurer, and he actually had a job. He was verbally abusive and had several coercive sexual encounters with women in the twig.
WOW year 1980-81 the coordinator wasn't a heavy drinker, but hit on both WOW sisters and any other woman who got near him. His "job" was to put in a lawn at our rented home, for which the landlord would let him deduct money from the rent. He slept in every daty and killed the lawn. The landlord naturally wanted to be paid back, but the rent deductions had gone into the coordinator's pockets as his salary, so in effect the other 3 of us paid for him to live. Coordinator couldn't find a job for a while after that, so the 3 of us continued to support him. Eventually his father lent us some money to pay the rent. When we paid him back at the end of the year his dad gave the money to our coordinator, so we got screwed again.
I was also in a couple of Way Homes in 1981-82 that were a lot better in that nobody was drinking the rent money, stealing from us or trying to screw everything that moved (figureatively or literally.
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Bolshevik
Way disciple is one of those things where years later you're walking along and you suddenly get a chill and stop in your tracks. Your arm starts to twitch and your head vibrates as it cocks to one side. You then realize something like terror.
Then your spouse shakes you out of it. You tell her of a Way D incident you just remembered and suddenly she begins to twitch and stare off into space . . .
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excathedra
dictor and howdy doody did more than hunt for pheasants when they came to the cat home i ended up living in
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JustThinking
Wow,
WayHomes? Hmm...where to start. First, amazingly, there was a LOT of good that came from living in one. But a LOT of crap too. Let's see if my brain will allow me to remember...
First roommate turned out to be gay. Nice. Oh, and very gay. Bought a water bed. Told TC he was gay and was told I was crazy. Later learned why they SUCH good friends. No wonder he covered for him.
Guess his brilliant "overseers" in the corpse missed the whole attraction to men thing.
Second roommate was a girl. Yep. Awkward. Very awkward. Same level of hormonal control as roommate #1.
Third roommate was a guy who also wanted his own bed. Yes!!! Thank goodness! No more sleeping with one eye open.
Fourth and fifth roommates shared the basement. Very cool and very normal. Life was great!!! Oh and both had cars that worked so no more scamming off of me all the time. Both went WOW. Afraid to see what comes next...
Another female. Sort of. Fifth roommate wasn't one so much as a corpse grad looking for a husband. Practically moved in. Lots of "chatting" to see who was future corpse material. Must. Run. Fast. Now...
Learned many useful things including how to select better roommates.
JT
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MountainTopCO
Just my 2 cents… The concept of the Way Home is another concept stolen from somewhere else. I doubt that VPW got any revelation in starting the Way Home program. In my opinion, VPW stole this idea from the House of Acts in San Francisco area. The House of Acts had its own questionable moral issues as well. Mostly the same issued discussed here. You would think a mature man of God like VPW would have gleaned from the better aspects of it and purged the bad. Or at least warned people of problems that can arise. But apparently VPW benefited from the bad so why purge it. I guess he was not the man of God he claimed to be.
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