Cancer is cancer Tommy. If it isn't detected early as it was in our case -- it is fatal! Skin cancer and Breast Cancer even Cervical and Prostate Cancer are much more detectable than say Lung or Pancreatic cancer---But they are still Cancer. Besides having to deal with heart stuff...I also had Cancer when I was 29---Cervical..4 days before my wedding in Dallas in 87 - my Dr. called and gave me the news---We were still married but I did end up having surgery later. No I didn't have Chemo--I didn't know if it had spread and the Dr. wouldn't know until they got inside whether r not I could keep my female reproductive organs -- so that was my first question when I woke up...Then I peed -- ate a cracker and they discharged me...I still had cancer...but at 29 -- I wasn't reflective about it...I was busy trying to figure out what being married to this other guy was about. I became reflective after the heart attack though. And yes...I have started to do my bucket list....WHY WAIT ! Anyone who used to know me---I am now a redhead!
I worked for nine years in a cancer hospital. It sounded grim at first, but honestly some of the most inspiring, happy, joyful individuals I have ever met are cancer survivors and even cancer patients. You have to learn to live every moment.
Be joyful! Savor each new experienced, try something you haven't tried before.
Be healed in mind and body and spirit - it's an emotional rollercoaster.
Be vigilant. Keep your doctor's appointments and do what they say.
Be thankful.
I'm thankful for you!
The cancer survivor I admire the most waded right back into the fray - as a physician specializing in cancer treatment. This individual is one of my heroes.
Sure you're a survivor. You had a serious cancer, and thank God your outcome was better than most who are diagnosed with melanoma. There are women who are lucky enough to get breast cancer treated with just a lumpectomy. They are survivors too.
God bless anyone who has to deal with that diagnosis. It takes a survivor to get through any part of treatment.
I had a BCC removed a few years ago. I've also had some actinic keratoses (pre-cancerous lesions) on my face. The dermatologist removed the latter with liquid nitrogen, but then later gave me a tube of fluorouracil to use on my face to get them all. It actually is chemotherapy, but the effect is that of a nasty skin peel. Anyway, I'm okay now, but one needs to check often. Especially if you grew up like me without much concern about skin exposure.
Friend has had lots of these little moley things removed. It started a couple of years ago; frightened me at first, now it's no big deal. Some he has had removed by minor surgery (like you) - others by some sort of cream rubbed in (like GSG mentions).
Nobody thought about covering the skin/avoiding sun exposure 30 or 40 years ago - everyone wanted to be tanned (read, burned to a crisp). Now we realize how deep fried the skin really was.
It might be "commonplace" but it still makes you think. You've survived this; you may well find other lesions over the next few months or years.
Every day is a bonus; what are you going to do to make your "extra time" worthwhile? Even though it's easily treated - make every day a special day. :) Be thankful! :) :)
I'm 51 and fair skinned so I guess I was a good candidate. I had been wanting to get back into songwriting. I'll have to sit down with the guitar and see if I can break though the "writer's block."
I'm 51 and fair skinned so I guess I was a good candidate. I had been wanting to get back into songwriting. I'll have to sit down with the guitar and see if I can break though the "writer's block."
Hmmm then I suggest a little diddy about your Dog or if you don't have a dog then your best friend
not too crazy important but some fun activity you did.
Actually Leafy I have a cat so the best I could come up with on short notice would be something like;
"I have a cat and his name is Bob,
He's a real neat cat, ain't no slob.
I'm jealous of this cat and I'll tell you why.
He has fun all day, I work 9 to 5."
Actually I have this melody that I feel God gave me but I'm having trouble coming with good words to go with the tune. Probably I should just write "filler lyrics" to go with the melody and then fix them up and make them better.
Actually Leafy I have a cat so the best I could come up with on short notice would be something like;
"I have a cat and his name is Bob,
He's a real neat cat, ain't no slob.
I'm jealous of this cat and I'll tell you why.
He has fun all day, I work 9 to 5."
Actually I have this melody that I feel God gave me but I'm having trouble coming with good words to go with the tune. Probably I should just write "filler lyrics" to go with the melody and then fix them up and make them better.
One of the things that facing the fact that life does have an end has done for me is that it has enhanced the concept of not living with any regrets.
It is something I used to talk about and tried to do...but I think my filter - read decision process- has become more "in my face."
While I am not a big subsciber to "the secret" I do believe in setting goals and visions that align with what I want for my life and the people in it. I think it (facing terminality (is there a word)) makes you sift the wheat and chaff in your own life.
Creative outlets are OH SO CRITICAL.....One of the things I thought about in my hospital bed last August was how U wanted to paint gigantic sunflowers on canvas for one particular wall in our house. I started the planning...I also made a few other decisions...
WRITE SONGS --tons -- everything you remotely care about becomes part of your legacy and energy---don't shelve it!
It's wierd how these medical things are what it takes to get stuff off the shelf...
I know exactly what you mean. I think the turning point for me was not so much being diagnosed with insulin dependent diabetes, but the birth of two grandsons, one of whom is in a sticky situation with my son's ex, who apparently talks trash about us to him. I realized that I won't always be around to talk to him personally, so I started filling out my Grandmother's Book, and then started putting other things in it, like the lyrics to a song I had on my bulletin board at work that says a lot about what I want for him, pictures, birthday cards, etc. I've been filling out the structured part but also want to go beyond that. How do I tell him that I only wanted the best for him, and that no matter what he does in life, I will always love him and believe in him?
I told him I pray for him every day, and I do. He was delighted to hear it. But when I'm gone the way of all flesh, I want him to remember this.
When there's an empty chair at the dinner table, what do I want him to remember about the woman who sat there?
I have been on a wild ride with my own cancer experiences. The medical take on cancer, and often our own first hand experiences with it are the reason it scares many of us. It should. It is very often deadly. I am 55 (well 54, actually). Let me sum up in the event that my experiences can be of any help to you. Who knows:)
1. My Dad died from mat. prostate cancer when he was 59. He was the same age as I was when I was diagnosed with the same thing. Mine, like his, was also very aggressive. His death was a horrible downhill experience. The biggest issue for me was thinking that my end would be just like his. And why not? Right? See, I had to fix that. I got it resolved with EFT. (Google it if you want to know more.).
2. Prior to choosing what I would do, my Dr. (who is a DO) told me to get a book called: "Outsmart Your Cancer" by Tanya Pierce. Very well researched. Has many non-toxic alternative treatments that work.
3. I had surgery. Prior to that, I changed my diet. Exercised a lot. Put my life on hold, more or less. Oh yes... and I had no health insurance, either. The surgery seemed to be a success.
4. Almost two years go by. I am doing "great". Lost some functionality due to the surgery, but I was grateful to be alive. Then.... .... Two weeks before Thanksgiving of 08... I get a "bad" report. The cancer is "back". Only they don't know for sure where it is. I visit 4 doctors, including the best oncologist at Emory. Everybody gives me crappy news. They will only be able to "make me more comfortable." Crap!!!!
5. So, I have re-grouped. Now, I am doing a very serious de-tox program with a Doctor in LA. Eating raw foods, juicing. This Doctor used to run a Nautropthic Cancer Clinic. I am also de-toxing my emotional states of being. It's ALL gotta GO!! :)
Here is where I am at right now. I am pretty sure I will be one of those who make it. And I am not just whistling past the grave yard, if you catch my drift.
Cancer has been, by far, the worst/best thing that has happened to me. It forced me to face my WHOLE life and deal with it. I am freer today than any other time in my life.
Sometimes I weep for joy when I stand outside and breath in the fresh air, sunshine, and feel the breeze as it plays around my skin and hair. Life is so ALIVE!! now! The mundane has become a portal to wondrous moments.
This is quite a change from my engineering type of persona I have had for many years.
If I were you... and I am not - of course - I would get the book.
Thank you WG! Nice to post again. Been a long time. :) Nice to see you, too -
I see your moniker says "Go Bucks". So I am presuming that you are a Milwaukee Bucks fan - I lived in Milwaukee and the area for a good many years. Lots of great memories.
New years eve 1992. I drove up to the house to see my wife sitting in a chair on the side walk to the front door. She was sheeling pecans. Something was up. I soon learned that the biopse that she had 2 weeks before was cancer.
WE went through almost a year of surgury and cemo. She has been cancer free since then.
About 5 years ago when she went in for her anual blood test the numbers came in high. They did some tests and said lets wait 2 months and see what they are again before we do more tests. That is when I found out how devastating cancer can be.
When you are fighting cancer you have to have a positive attitude. If you ever feel down walk through a cancer hospital and look at the other people. Man we got it good and are luck compared to the other people. There is always someone who is in worse shape. But when you are home continplating going through it again. It is the most scary think in the world. I don't know if I could stand up to it again.
I was not the cancer survivor. I was the prime care giver. I have watched spouses walk out of a doctors office and leave their spouse sitting there without support. I lived in a hospital almost for 6 months. I don't know if I have the strength to do it again.
Look to the future. Look to God for strenght. Pray that you don't have to do it again.
Four women went through breast cancer here all at the same time. My wife is the only one alive today.
Look to the future. Look to God for strenght. Pray that you don't have to do it again.
I am happy to hear that she is getting along well. And that is good advice. Look to the future. Indeed. It is wonderful, if you can see it with your own eyes.
Going through it again. Yes. The recurrence. I can certainly identify with the rush of those feelings.
I told my wife "I don't want to get in that saddle, again, honey. I thought those days were behind me." But, honestly, (and to borrow a phrase from Sara Palin: I am not putting lipstick on a pig, here) I am really feeling great now on my de-tox program. REALLY! Truly.
For me this situation could be said to be an even bigger blessing than the first time. I know that may sound like propaganda, but it is not.
On this past Thanksgiving I gathered everybody around and talked about their fears... their fears for me and what it might mean if things don't work out. I told them that everybody can ask me ANYTHING. Anything about my cancer. Not to worry about my state of mind. "Believe me", I said, "I have already thought of all the worst."
It turned out to be a wonderful, most wonderful Thanksgiving.
Listening to doctors and specialists and people with lots of training and experience, it is easy to feel overwhelmed. Very easy. But, they can not do my living or dying for me. That is up to me. And I choose - LIFE.
I know I could still loose this deal, see. I am not a fool. But, I am not going sit in despair. I have felt the despair. I did not run from it. I felt this thing tackle me from behind. I felt myself loosing the struggle to live. It would sneak up on me several times a day. It was horrible. I know what it feels like to be ignorant of what choice will or might help me.
I also know what it feels like to have the constancy and life of Christ well up - and stand for me, in me. To calm me. To save me from the dread and cold-stalking dis-ease.
I am not special in this regard. Countless people have experienced what I am going through now. They were beacons for me. May we pass on whatever light we actually find in this life.
After all, life is not about finding what I wanted to find - at least it has not been for me - but it has been about how I respond to it. In that regard, we are ALL very much alike.
I guess in a warped way I was lucky. I was too busy hurting from the kidney stone to think about the cancer except for the first few days after the diagnosis.
TGN, I'll keep you in my prayers. For me Christmas was rough because I had just gotten the diagnosis and it was the first Christmas since my sister's husband had died from cancer. The one thing that was funny was when we were about to leave. I apologized to me sister for being so low key and she told me that if there was anything she could do she'd be there for me. To emphasize her point she started poking my arm right on the stitches ! I jumped away and she felt bad but I told her not to worry because it felt like something right out of "Airplane" or some other comedy.
TommyZ, Thanks for offering prayer. Of course I will receive it with open arms!
Regarding your situation, I do wish you the very best outcome possible. Facing all the things we need to in order to get through these situations without relying upon denial is a powerful lesson in self honesty.
Anyway, there are MANY great lessons I could ramble on about.
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Shellon
Thoughts of your wife, Kevin, will keep you all in prayers. My maternal grandmother had breast cancer and my mother has breast issues that keep her cautious so I, of course, pay very close attention
markomalley
There is a downside to having the knowledge of genetic predispositions. One who has a documented predisposition will not be able to get life insurance (I've actually had to fill out forms asking that
Shellon
Hi Mark, I'd agree, it does paint a certain stain on the person that shouldn't be there when the bottom line is they need care, period.
DaddyHoundog
Cancer is cancer Tommy. If it isn't detected early as it was in our case -- it is fatal! Skin cancer and Breast Cancer even Cervical and Prostate Cancer are much more detectable than say Lung or Pancreatic cancer---But they are still Cancer. Besides having to deal with heart stuff...I also had Cancer when I was 29---Cervical..4 days before my wedding in Dallas in 87 - my Dr. called and gave me the news---We were still married but I did end up having surgery later. No I didn't have Chemo--I didn't know if it had spread and the Dr. wouldn't know until they got inside whether r not I could keep my female reproductive organs -- so that was my first question when I woke up...Then I peed -- ate a cracker and they discharged me...I still had cancer...but at 29 -- I wasn't reflective about it...I was busy trying to figure out what being married to this other guy was about. I became reflective after the heart attack though. And yes...I have started to do my bucket list....WHY WAIT ! Anyone who used to know me---I am now a redhead!
PS: posted by Washingtonweather aka. washn'wear
Edited by DaddyHoundogLink to comment
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Watered Garden
I worked for nine years in a cancer hospital. It sounded grim at first, but honestly some of the most inspiring, happy, joyful individuals I have ever met are cancer survivors and even cancer patients. You have to learn to live every moment.
Be joyful! Savor each new experienced, try something you haven't tried before.
Be healed in mind and body and spirit - it's an emotional rollercoaster.
Be vigilant. Keep your doctor's appointments and do what they say.
Be thankful.
I'm thankful for you!
The cancer survivor I admire the most waded right back into the fray - as a physician specializing in cancer treatment. This individual is one of my heroes.
WG
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Nottawayfer
Sure you're a survivor. You had a serious cancer, and thank God your outcome was better than most who are diagnosed with melanoma. There are women who are lucky enough to get breast cancer treated with just a lumpectomy. They are survivors too.
God bless anyone who has to deal with that diagnosis. It takes a survivor to get through any part of treatment.
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GeorgeStGeorge
I had a BCC removed a few years ago. I've also had some actinic keratoses (pre-cancerous lesions) on my face. The dermatologist removed the latter with liquid nitrogen, but then later gave me a tube of fluorouracil to use on my face to get them all. It actually is chemotherapy, but the effect is that of a nasty skin peel. Anyway, I'm okay now, but one needs to check often. Especially if you grew up like me without much concern about skin exposure.
George
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leafytwiglet
How lucky you are to have had the melanoma found and extracted early.
Melanomas of the skin can be very aggressive and are nothing to sneeze at.
Life is very short and to be savored and enjoyed when ever possible.
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Twinky
Friend has had lots of these little moley things removed. It started a couple of years ago; frightened me at first, now it's no big deal. Some he has had removed by minor surgery (like you) - others by some sort of cream rubbed in (like GSG mentions).
Nobody thought about covering the skin/avoiding sun exposure 30 or 40 years ago - everyone wanted to be tanned (read, burned to a crisp). Now we realize how deep fried the skin really was.
It might be "commonplace" but it still makes you think. You've survived this; you may well find other lesions over the next few months or years.
Every day is a bonus; what are you going to do to make your "extra time" worthwhile? Even though it's easily treated - make every day a special day. :) Be thankful! :) :)
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TOMMYZ
I'm 51 and fair skinned so I guess I was a good candidate. I had been wanting to get back into songwriting. I'll have to sit down with the guitar and see if I can break though the "writer's block."
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leafytwiglet
Hmmm then I suggest a little diddy about your Dog or if you don't have a dog then your best friend
not too crazy important but some fun activity you did.
Just to break the ice
you know like this
I had a dog
his name was Fred
he liked to play in the woods
and his coat was red.
just something silly and fun to get you started.
:)
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TOMMYZ
Actually Leafy I have a cat so the best I could come up with on short notice would be something like;
"I have a cat and his name is Bob,
He's a real neat cat, ain't no slob.
I'm jealous of this cat and I'll tell you why.
He has fun all day, I work 9 to 5."
Actually I have this melody that I feel God gave me but I'm having trouble coming with good words to go with the tune. Probably I should just write "filler lyrics" to go with the melody and then fix them up and make them better.
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waysider
Hmmmmm-----Sounds like a Zydeco tune to me.
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TOMMYZ
I was thinking Bo Diddley but Zydeco would work too!
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leafytwiglet
Well I love the cat song and now it needs a melody too..
see two songs just like that.
I hope the words come to you for your song.
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DaddyHoundog
One of the things that facing the fact that life does have an end has done for me is that it has enhanced the concept of not living with any regrets.
It is something I used to talk about and tried to do...but I think my filter - read decision process- has become more "in my face."
While I am not a big subsciber to "the secret" I do believe in setting goals and visions that align with what I want for my life and the people in it. I think it (facing terminality (is there a word)) makes you sift the wheat and chaff in your own life.
Creative outlets are OH SO CRITICAL.....One of the things I thought about in my hospital bed last August was how U wanted to paint gigantic sunflowers on canvas for one particular wall in our house. I started the planning...I also made a few other decisions...
WRITE SONGS --tons -- everything you remotely care about becomes part of your legacy and energy---don't shelve it!
It's wierd how these medical things are what it takes to get stuff off the shelf...
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waysider
When I look in the mirror, I wonder why there's some old guy looking back at me.
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Watered Garden
WW/DHD,
I know exactly what you mean. I think the turning point for me was not so much being diagnosed with insulin dependent diabetes, but the birth of two grandsons, one of whom is in a sticky situation with my son's ex, who apparently talks trash about us to him. I realized that I won't always be around to talk to him personally, so I started filling out my Grandmother's Book, and then started putting other things in it, like the lyrics to a song I had on my bulletin board at work that says a lot about what I want for him, pictures, birthday cards, etc. I've been filling out the structured part but also want to go beyond that. How do I tell him that I only wanted the best for him, and that no matter what he does in life, I will always love him and believe in him?
I told him I pray for him every day, and I do. He was delighted to hear it. But when I'm gone the way of all flesh, I want him to remember this.
When there's an empty chair at the dinner table, what do I want him to remember about the woman who sat there?
WG
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Too Gray Now
Tommy,
I have been on a wild ride with my own cancer experiences. The medical take on cancer, and often our own first hand experiences with it are the reason it scares many of us. It should. It is very often deadly. I am 55 (well 54, actually). Let me sum up in the event that my experiences can be of any help to you. Who knows:)
1. My Dad died from mat. prostate cancer when he was 59. He was the same age as I was when I was diagnosed with the same thing. Mine, like his, was also very aggressive. His death was a horrible downhill experience. The biggest issue for me was thinking that my end would be just like his. And why not? Right? See, I had to fix that. I got it resolved with EFT. (Google it if you want to know more.).
2. Prior to choosing what I would do, my Dr. (who is a DO) told me to get a book called: "Outsmart Your Cancer" by Tanya Pierce. Very well researched. Has many non-toxic alternative treatments that work.
3. I had surgery. Prior to that, I changed my diet. Exercised a lot. Put my life on hold, more or less. Oh yes... and I had no health insurance, either. The surgery seemed to be a success.
4. Almost two years go by. I am doing "great". Lost some functionality due to the surgery, but I was grateful to be alive. Then.... .... Two weeks before Thanksgiving of 08... I get a "bad" report. The cancer is "back". Only they don't know for sure where it is. I visit 4 doctors, including the best oncologist at Emory. Everybody gives me crappy news. They will only be able to "make me more comfortable." Crap!!!!
5. So, I have re-grouped. Now, I am doing a very serious de-tox program with a Doctor in LA. Eating raw foods, juicing. This Doctor used to run a Nautropthic Cancer Clinic. I am also de-toxing my emotional states of being. It's ALL gotta GO!! :)
Here is where I am at right now. I am pretty sure I will be one of those who make it. And I am not just whistling past the grave yard, if you catch my drift.
Cancer has been, by far, the worst/best thing that has happened to me. It forced me to face my WHOLE life and deal with it. I am freer today than any other time in my life.
Sometimes I weep for joy when I stand outside and breath in the fresh air, sunshine, and feel the breeze as it plays around my skin and hair. Life is so ALIVE!! now! The mundane has become a portal to wondrous moments.
This is quite a change from my engineering type of persona I have had for many years.
If I were you... and I am not - of course - I would get the book.
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Watered Garden
TGN,
God bless you!
WG
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Too Gray Now
Thank you WG! Nice to post again. Been a long time. :) Nice to see you, too -
I see your moniker says "Go Bucks". So I am presuming that you are a Milwaukee Bucks fan - I lived in Milwaukee and the area for a good many years. Lots of great memories.
Best to you!
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ex70sHouston
Cancer
New years eve 1992. I drove up to the house to see my wife sitting in a chair on the side walk to the front door. She was sheeling pecans. Something was up. I soon learned that the biopse that she had 2 weeks before was cancer.
WE went through almost a year of surgury and cemo. She has been cancer free since then.
About 5 years ago when she went in for her anual blood test the numbers came in high. They did some tests and said lets wait 2 months and see what they are again before we do more tests. That is when I found out how devastating cancer can be.
When you are fighting cancer you have to have a positive attitude. If you ever feel down walk through a cancer hospital and look at the other people. Man we got it good and are luck compared to the other people. There is always someone who is in worse shape. But when you are home continplating going through it again. It is the most scary think in the world. I don't know if I could stand up to it again.
I was not the cancer survivor. I was the prime care giver. I have watched spouses walk out of a doctors office and leave their spouse sitting there without support. I lived in a hospital almost for 6 months. I don't know if I have the strength to do it again.
Look to the future. Look to God for strenght. Pray that you don't have to do it again.
Four women went through breast cancer here all at the same time. My wife is the only one alive today.
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Watered Garden
TGN, I send you a PM from WG (so as not to derail).
WG
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Too Gray Now
I am happy to hear that she is getting along well. And that is good advice. Look to the future. Indeed. It is wonderful, if you can see it with your own eyes.
Going through it again. Yes. The recurrence. I can certainly identify with the rush of those feelings.
I told my wife "I don't want to get in that saddle, again, honey. I thought those days were behind me." But, honestly, (and to borrow a phrase from Sara Palin: I am not putting lipstick on a pig, here) I am really feeling great now on my de-tox program. REALLY! Truly.
For me this situation could be said to be an even bigger blessing than the first time. I know that may sound like propaganda, but it is not.
On this past Thanksgiving I gathered everybody around and talked about their fears... their fears for me and what it might mean if things don't work out. I told them that everybody can ask me ANYTHING. Anything about my cancer. Not to worry about my state of mind. "Believe me", I said, "I have already thought of all the worst."
It turned out to be a wonderful, most wonderful Thanksgiving.
Listening to doctors and specialists and people with lots of training and experience, it is easy to feel overwhelmed. Very easy. But, they can not do my living or dying for me. That is up to me. And I choose - LIFE.
I know I could still loose this deal, see. I am not a fool. But, I am not going sit in despair. I have felt the despair. I did not run from it. I felt this thing tackle me from behind. I felt myself loosing the struggle to live. It would sneak up on me several times a day. It was horrible. I know what it feels like to be ignorant of what choice will or might help me.
I also know what it feels like to have the constancy and life of Christ well up - and stand for me, in me. To calm me. To save me from the dread and cold-stalking dis-ease.
I am not special in this regard. Countless people have experienced what I am going through now. They were beacons for me. May we pass on whatever light we actually find in this life.
After all, life is not about finding what I wanted to find - at least it has not been for me - but it has been about how I respond to it. In that regard, we are ALL very much alike.
Best to all -
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TOMMYZ
I guess in a warped way I was lucky. I was too busy hurting from the kidney stone to think about the cancer except for the first few days after the diagnosis.
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TOMMYZ
TGN, I'll keep you in my prayers. For me Christmas was rough because I had just gotten the diagnosis and it was the first Christmas since my sister's husband had died from cancer. The one thing that was funny was when we were about to leave. I apologized to me sister for being so low key and she told me that if there was anything she could do she'd be there for me. To emphasize her point she started poking my arm right on the stitches ! I jumped away and she felt bad but I told her not to worry because it felt like something right out of "Airplane" or some other comedy.
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Too Gray Now
TommyZ, Thanks for offering prayer. Of course I will receive it with open arms!
Regarding your situation, I do wish you the very best outcome possible. Facing all the things we need to in order to get through these situations without relying upon denial is a powerful lesson in self honesty.
Anyway, there are MANY great lessons I could ramble on about.
Best to you...
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