Did you go out with a bang, or silently into the night?

[JavaJane]

Just curious - been talking to some friends of mine who are still innies and doing some thinking about things. First of all, I didn't realize really how much of a WIMP twi makes people when it came to dealing with other people - I remember wanting to please everyone all of the time, especially if they had a title - and it was all out of fear that I would be kicked out or humiliated in front of other people... Funny thing is, now I could care less what those people think.

And then I thought about the manner in which people leave when they get too fed up with all the bs.

Some people just sort of disappeared - left in the night never to be heard from again.

Some people made a huge scene with confrontation.

Some people got kicked out and humiliated in front of everyone.

Some people were put on "probation" and then realized it was a lot nicer being out than it was being in.

Where do you fit? My husband and I sort of faded into the background by moving a few times... it was a slow transitition for us. But I think that is what I needed to be able to really think clearly on the subject. And it just sort of happened that way - we didn't "plan" on leaving, we just did. We wrestled for a while with if we should "take a stand" and "confront the darkness"... but would it do any good? Would anyone listen other than our close friends? Would we be able to take down the ministry by exposing the error of their ways?

For us, the answer was no. We were nobodies...no titles, we had resisted the suggestions to go into the Corps... who would listen? And if they did listen, could they make any real changes?

I would be very interested to hear anyone else's opinions on this.

[waterbuffalo]

Sounds like you did the right thing for you, JJ. How cool that you "...faded into the background by moving a few times... it was a slow transitition for us. But I think that is what I needed to be able to really think clearly on the subject."

My ex-hubs and I didn't answer our Corps assignment letter to accept/reject. We did about the same thing as you after we moved--just left but didn't notify anyone at HQ. A few mos. later they wrote us to tell us we were dropped from what I understand. I was not interested enough to read the propaganda letter since we'd already dropped them.

[Ham]

"we KNOW something is wrong with you. You'd better come clean.. spill your guts.. tell us what spirit are you harboring.."

I slowly backed away to the door.. "Hmm. I'll have to think about it. Yeah.. think about it, and get back with you.."

"Oh. OK..

I don't think they were exactly prepared for that..

I never went back.

Now I don't know what kind of impact my departure made.. I have no idea how they spinned it.. I haven't heard from people still in for years..

[TOMMYZ]

In '89 most of us in Illinois left en masse. It was more like TWI leaving us, not versa.

[cheranne]

I slipped out gracefully only because I didn't want to be tracked down(like I was before) the moment

I got off the plane and came back to Oklahoma the phone rings and its Limb of DC(trying to pursuade

me too come back and not break my VOW(2nd yr wow)

Okay then.....no not so much(at that time I was still in the"ministry cult thing" just didn't want to

be a wow(again)and live in the ghetto of DC (and definetly not a twig leader)where our wow family

was just about as lucky as the homeless people we witnessed too(only sometimes THEY had food

to eat)

Oh You got me started now on this wacked out WOW thing,...ha Oh we looked pretty and smiled alot

running around DC with our marked up bibles saving the world when we hardly could afford rent in

the ghetto between the FIVE of us.

and sponsering Way Corp and abs....what a joke, at least when I left the wow field the family got

split up to better housing, and probably ate dinner every other day and had deodorant and toothpaste!

(If your reading this you guys..it was never YOU it was TWI! You guys had heart!!)

[GrouchoMarxJr]

I left on my terms...

I told them what I thought and walked out the door...never looked back...never regretted it.

I got over it in about 10 minutes.

[Nottawayfer]

I sent my FC, BC, and LC an email telling them I wasn't going to fellow$heet ever again and that nobody was to call me, come to my house, or try to talk to me ever again. The hard thing was I still had a boyfriend who was still in. They tried to be loving and told him to tell me hi and they missed me. I dumped the boyfriend about 3 months after leaving TWI because he was a miserable bastage.

Ironically the boyfriend started talking to me about GSC before I left. I chastised him for going online to read negative stuff about TWI. Buat then my curiosity peaked, and I started posting while I was still in. I was out about 6 weeks later. It was the final Advanced Class Special in Dallas that helped me make up my mind. That was in 2002. That class was SOOOOOO LAME!!!! What a freakin' waste of money. Plus I shared a room with somone in my fellowship who I couldn't stand to be around. I felt pressured to share a room with her. Gawd! I shiver at the things I did in the name of God.

The miserable bastage is still in TWI.

I'm a new me, and I'm liking me. Plus I met my soulmate, and married life has been bliss for the last 4 1/2 years.

Edited July 25, 2008 by Nottawayfer

[waysider]

I slipped quietly into the background in 1990.

I'm still waiting for someone to come looking for me.

"We sure do love ya!"----Riiiiiiight!

[WordWolf]

In '89 most of us in Illinois left en masse. It was more like TWI leaving us, not versa.

In 1989, lcm sent a letter to all of us saying that he was firing a bunch of our leadership,

and included a list of everyone from Branch level on up to the Limb.

He said they were all evil and corrupt, and serving themselves rather than serving God.

We'd interacted PERSONALLY with them. We were hard to convince THEY were corrupt.

Me, I went to the following ROA. I expected a chance to buy at the bookstore, and either

a correction-which I'd be present for, or more of the same as the letter-in which case

I'd get a chance to PERSONALLY review things, ask questions, hear answers.

The answers were all phrased politically, the events all felt staged and empty. It was as

if that ROA was put on by people working from a description of one, and never having

attended one. And the low points were all when people got to the main stage and spoke.

I used the opportunity to say my goodbyes to a number of people who all attended that

one as their last, and we all faded away after that.

I "left" the official organization in Ohio, but I "stayed" with the unofficial organization in NYC.

lcm's foolish decision to boot the leadership together meant we had a unified structure to

work with, and more people LEFT from 1989-1990 than stayed. (lcm did that with every

state at once.)

[dmiller]

I slipped quietly into the background in 1990.

I'm still waiting for someone to come looking for me.

"We sure do love ya!"----Riiiiiiight!

Yup -- That Christmas carol Silent Night comes to mind ----- >>>

"Silent night, Holy night.

Left the way, Without a fight."

Like TommyZ says -- they left me before I left them. :)

[T-Bone]

Journal of freedom 1986 entry: Under the cover of confusion provided by the Klueless Klucks Klan [upper leadership running around like chickens with their heads cut off] we were able to slip silently into the daylight of normalcy.

[Mark Clarke]

In '89 most of us in Illinois left en masse. It was more like TWI leaving us, not versa.

It was like that in Rhode Island too. And easier to do, being a small state.

[Bramble]

In the nineties we made several(many)bad decisions due to counsel with leadership. We quit running a fellowship(debt), sold our house, moved to a big city...it took years to pick up financially after that. Since we struggled financially we were under a balloon of suspicion for years.

As time went by my husband's health and a complication I had after a childbirth also made us weaker in the eyes of leadership. Eventually our HFC seemed to be trying to drive a wedge between us. I could do nothing right, hubby was the 'best'. Our life became consumed with performing to please, with counseling and reporting back etc. It was very stressful.

We actually left right as our HFC was planning another intrusive ocd counseling issue, and we had had the unpleasant experience before--he was the type to demand some action, then on the next meeting, ask why you hadn't done something else, while you'd been concentrating on the thing previously talked about--there was no pleasing him.

By this time hubby had seen with his own eyes some disturbing incidents of how the HFC treated me(HFC got too confident I think and let some ugly show) also he'd had a couple run ins with the limb co-ord. I wanted to leave a few years before hubby did, I stayed because I believed to leave would end our marriage.

Hubby made a phone call, but we weren't smart enoughto say no calls or visits, so we went through a grilling by the limb coordinator.

We did not believe at the time of leaving that we were doing the right thing. It was more an act of survival--we could not stand to go through it again(the reproof situation) and give up more of our lives to the HFC.

A few months later we learned we were mark and avoid.

[hiway29]

I left so quietly, no one knew I was gone.

I thought of all the years where it was absolutely crucial that I show up for every meeting, every class, every function, or face the wrath of a long line of leaders.

Now I was leaving , and no one gave a rat's a**. That was just fine with me, but I did find it 'funny' that I once thought these people actually 'cared' about me on some level.

[JavaJane]

I had my TC show up at my job a few times after we had left... that was a little awkward. :blink:

Funny, they never seemed to "follow up" on m husband - only me. Probably because they knew that he would just tell them where to go where I was more likely to listen since I was one of the ones "raised in the word."

Really it was just that I am a lot more polite than my husband. Some days I wish I could be rude!!

[Belle]

Well, I went out quietly, but there were waves of unrest and insurgency building up to it.

I was "allowed" to "take a break" from TWI activities and never returned.

[Nottawayfer]

Well, I went out quietly, but there were waves of unrest and insurgency building up to it.

I was "allowed" to "take a break" from TWI activities and never returned.

Oh, Belle, quit being so modest! You were a Wayward Wayfer who's insurgence covered the whole southeastern seaboard all the way to Headquarters. You stirred more stuff than most here did. And I, for one, got a big kick out of it! You had Moneyhands on the biggest witch hunt ever.

JavaJane, if you haven't heard Belle's interview, you HAVE to hear it.

Link to Belle's Interview

Edited July 25, 2008 by Nottawayfer

[JavaJane]

Belle is one of my heroes!

[Oakspear]

From the lawsuit announcement in April (?) 2000 until August 2001 I was "underground" posting on Waydale & GSC until I was found out by the WayGB. After a confrontation by my twig coordinator and the Region Coordinator & his wife I was informed over the phone that I was no longer welcome at Way functions because I "did not believe that the Trustees were leading the ministry in the right direction".

Immediately thereafter the RC began giving me instructions. After I laughed at him, he told me that he was not convinced that I would do as he asked. I replied that he had abdicated any authority that he had over me by throwing me out.

[Nottawayfer]

Oak,

Isn' it surreal that we even gave those jackarses any power over us to begin with? The whole subject to the higher powers idea was definitely manipulative in a major way.

[anotherDan]

My interaction with the Way was spiritual, and my family went into the Way Corps in '87, with the desire not only to grow in grace, and to prepare ourselves for "a lifetime of Christian service," but also to give back, to help right, the ministry that helped us to see the amazing and healing truths of God's own Word. This of course was after the Passing of a Patriarch (blows nose) and we, like many, were Dazed and Confused. Our Corps coordinators, Tom and Linda Maus*lf, left immediately after a visit to Gartmore. LCM came down to the Indiana Campus and blasted Tom and Linda for their betrayal "to God" and offered to meet with anyone who wanted to. I think I was the only one in my Corps to take him up on the offer. I met with him in the "Trustee Suite" during lunch for maybe an hour, and voiced my concerns about the ministry and the tack it was taking. He was reasonable and even meek, but said that he would only request that I afford him that which was due to ministry leaders according to Romans 13, and I gave him that.

As we were talking, Bob M*ynihan passed through the suite. He later sought me out and told me he had heard very few people speak to Rev. Martindale "like that" and wondered if "he had received any of it." I said that I thought he had. I remained in-residence with my family on the basis of our agreement that I was not going to be a yes-man to the Trustees. I felt I had a responsibility to God and a calling that required that I live my conscience.

After LCM issued the "my way or the highway" letter, I felt that he'd broken our agreement, and we left, ironically, on "Burn the Chaff Day," 1989. The wisdom of that decision, while inexplicable to some at the time, is now obviously the right decision. We had rough times since then, but by no means are we "grease-spots."

I remember with fondness the times Bob M. and I spent in the weeks ahead "working" the POP and its collateral materials, even though his conclusions inevitably differed from mine. We went though various Corps-Coordinators-Of-The-Week, including not only the M*ynihans, but the Burtons, W*lter Cummins, et al, and even our former CC's W*yne and Ferne Clapp, bless their hearts, until it was clear it was time to leave. Good people like Jim Pl*nket and Tony Kli*wer did not agree with our decision, but for us, it was right. The ministry was not salvageable. That was '89l

The rest is history.

[cheranne]

(I left three times)

The second time myself and another wow who left the field(broke our vows Oh my Lions,Tigers and

Bears!!!

We both just vanished in midday after everyone went to work in our new Way Home(we felt like the

outcast like the shunned amish or something)so we went to a truck stop in Phoneix with as little

stuff as possible with a goal to get to Florida.

We ended up in San Diego first,almost got killed in L.A. and hitchhiking in the 3a.m. is not good

for two pretty young girls(don't try that!)lots of gangs there and a truck driver rescued us out

of nowhere(I thought he was an angel)

An Indian man who never said a word just motioned to come and get in as a low rider approached

us.

Kinda still freaks me out a little writing this. He took us to the next place that was safe and I

don't know where we were but hitched a ride with some circus people(that was just weird)in a

back of a old pick up thru the valley,took turns keeping watch and ended up in san diego.

There she knew an old friend and we mostly just party(ied)for the next three weeks,thought of

joining the Navy(long story short we ended up in Long Island New York and joined the Army.

[Sushi]

I went out with a mini-bang (this was written when I was themanofathousandscreennames )

Life was fairly uneventful until the early spring of 1984. This is when the excrement impacted the rotating oscillator. Jim, one of my friends in the organization, was having a rougher than normal period in his life. It was

thought it was due to the major influence of the organization. I know this will come as a shocking revelation to anyone who has had contact with the organization for any length of time.

Jim had a friend named Peter. Peter is a former member of The Way Corps. This is the leadership training program for the organization. After spending the day with him, we all decided it would be in our better interests to disassociate ourselves from the organization.

Needless to say, the world as I knew it came to an abrupt end. On the way home, I elected to do all the driving. It was an eight hour trip. I needed something to occupy my hands, since my head was doing donuts in the parking lot of my mind.

One of the methods the organization uses to keep the rank and file in line is the threat of being marked and avoided. This is very similar to the Amish practice of shunning. Within days, people who were supposedly my

best friends had great difficulty if not found it impossible to talk to me. My social circle disappeared faster than a computer file can.

Later on, I made the apparent mistake of talking to someone who expressed a desire to extricate themselves from the evil empire. I hadn't even set a date to talk further to this person when I got a phone call from one of thelocal gang leaders.

It was approximately 11 o'clock at night. I had been asleep for about an hour. Therefore, I was fairly foggy for most of the phone call. The last thing this person said to me was (and this is a paraphrase) "You better walk down the street looking behind your back". This was should I have continued talking to people who were dissatisfied with the status quo of the organization. An obvious attempt at the "love of God in the renewed mind in manifestation". I've since learned, they tack on "toward the household". Present truth abounds.

The rest of the story is in the "My Story" forums.

[Attack Gypsy]

I went out with a bang. A big one.

After sitting through a long grilling by both limb and branch coordinators, me and my fiancee, now wife, had just about had enough. And I think they realized it.

Then they uttered the key words "You need to renew your mind and never see or talk to him again". This was in relation to my little brother whom they told me never to see again, because he had already left.

I snapped.

I don't actually remember it, but this is what my lady told me I did. I turned beet red, whispered "how dare you", picked up the chair I was in, and flung it across the room and through a window. Then I said "We're outta here". And we both got up and left, and never returned.

Mind you, this is what she told me I said and did. I have no memory of anything after "renew your mind" until I got home 20 minutes later. Never blacked out from rage before. Was quite an interesting experience.

We're now very happy little pagans on the great wheel of life.

[Oakspear]

We're now very happy little pagans on the great wheel of life.