WhiteDove- What I wrote above was in regard to Abi's originating post on this thread, she's the one who says she doesn't like labels, I just pointed out she uses them too, when it fits her opinions-that's all.
If you want to know what I think - I LIKE LABELS.
In fact I like using wierewill apologist, I think it is perfect for any biblical discussion.
I enjoyed it when wierewill apologists get outed too, in fact I've been known to gloat over it.
I love it that you are trying so hard to draw Dot Matrix into another nonsensical fight, and me too, with no basis or logical progression on either one of them.
I hope she doesn't take the bait seriously, she should respond, and mock you for your attempt to start another flame war mock fight over nothing....
Good try though, funny to watch you tap dance so much....
We all know the childhood saying about sticks and stones and names will never hurt me. At least some of us know that isn't true. We know very well that words can hurt us.
For the past couple of weeks, this place has been full of hurtful and hateful words. I don't really care how one justifies it. "He started it first," etc. That's kindergarten justification. I don't even except that excuse from my children.
I have watched people be labelled, I have watched their words get twisted into things they have never said, hell, I watched one man basically have his identity outed (though maybe most of you already knew who he was - I certainly did not) in the name of DEFENDING him. Yet, I would imagine if he wanted his identity revealed he would have posted under his real name. A list of who should be "banned" was put together. I could go on and on, but why bother.
It is like a sickness. Maybe some of us had it before TWI. TWI certainly encouraged it. This notion of "reproof" and "confrontation." And it is till alive and well here at the cafe. The legacy of TWI certainly lives on and on and on.
Personally, I feel like I have had the .... kicked out of me. I feel physically bruised and battered, and it was all done with words and in the name of some "greater good." I am certainly not sure what that greater good is anymore, and I certainly am at a loss to understand what I did to deserve it.
5 threads all hurling accusations and cruelty and people. Calling people out for battle. Not one thread pulled down, most (though thankfully not all) of those posts still stand.
I started one thread, asking for an honest discussion about what does and does not constitute a personal attack. It appears few really want to discuss that issue. Perhaps because it would cause them to look too closely at their own behavior, I don't know. What I do know is a Moderator spoke up on the one thread where it was politely asked that no labels and name calling be used, and esentially said there was no point to discussing the issue, no point in having started the thread. Yet the moderators have been by and large silent regarding most of the cruelty and calling out that has gone on through 5 threads now.
I don't envy Paw and the moderators. At this point, if this were my board I would probably close it down. That Paw has not causes me to have great admiration for him. I realize too, that there is no way in hell the moderators can read every post and remove every personal attack. They volunteer their time here, they have jobs and families at home that need them.
Rabbi Jospeh Telushkin wrote that one of the worst "sins" (sins isn't his word it is mine, because at the moment I cannot come up with a more apt one) is to be indifferent to someone else's suffering. There is a lot of that going on around here. Worst of all, that indifferece is upheld and defended in the name of one person's suffering and at the expense of anothers.
This is no longer a community I care to participate in. I cannot, for the life of me see how all of this bashing each others brains in with words is helpful to anyone. Indeed, not only does it probably chase off many people who come here looking for answers and looking for help, but it hurts the participants as well.
Paw, you put forth a valiant effor with this place. Do not misinterpret what I have said as an accusation against you. There simply isn't a way to moderate this place effectively if the participants will not use compassion and self control to moderate themselves.
I'm done.
Flame away.
Abi,
The solution is SIMPLY -- Do NOT feed the troll.
Do not answer. Do not respond. Do not reply. Do not REASON with.
Just IGNORE it. Consciously. Deliberately. Consistently. Universally.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
Do NOT acknowledge ANY point the troll thinks it's making.
When EVERYONE does this consistently, it will (eventually) work.
It will not necessarily be by banning the troll, but if it (the troll) is ignored by all, if the bait is NEVER taken, it ceases to meet whatever need it represents to the troll.
A thread about someone leaving because of the pettiness of the conversations lately and the thread derails and turns petty. No surprise here………… Oh and stalking name calling -_-
Hey Bell, I edited my stuff before I saw your post to explain ...hopefully making my meaning a little clearer.
No ignoring didn`t work, they found new and better ways to disrupt.
People want it stopped. It is happening, but that isn`t good enough, now everybodies a bunch of meanies.
Ignoring the crap, while it sounds good in theory, didn`t work in twi, turning a blind eye doesn`t work in our communities...and it certainly hasn`t been working around here.
Rascal, IGNORING DOES WORK.
Ignoring (aka DON'T FEED THE TROLL) is NOT the same as turning a blind eye.
Ignoring in this case is refusing to meet the unspoken (or sometimes spoken) demand of the troll to play the game by his rules. When NO ONE takes the bait, the troll starves to death. This IS effective and perhaps the most merciful approach overall.
Turning a blind eye is to essentially recognize a behavior that is done for a different reason (for example, Rosie turned a blind eye to Martindale's pervasive sexual harassment in the workplace). The behavior of the violator in that situation, the sexual predator, was NOT being done for the purpose of getting people to engage the predator in verbal sparring. Instead, Rosie's turning a blind eye, in that situation ENABLED the predator to feed his evil lust by using people without detection by many... because Rosie KNEW but didn't speak up and out.
COMPLETELY different motivations of the perpetrators of the unacceptable actions/conduct.
WhiteDove- What I wrote above was in regard to Abi's originating post on this thread, she's the one who says she doesn't like labels, I just pointed out she uses them too, when it fits her opinions-that's all.
If you want to know what I think - I LIKE LABELS.
In fact I like using wierewill apologist, I think it is perfect for any biblical discussion.
I enjoyed it when wierewill apologists get outed too, in fact I've been known to gloat over it.
Game over try again, WD......
Have a nice day. :)
Now I SEE -- PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE TROLL.
Do NOT even respond. Do NOT even acknowledge.
This WILL WORK when it is done consistently.
I love it that you are trying so hard to draw Dot Matrix into another nonsensical fight, and me too, with no basis or logical progression on either one of them.
I hope she doesn't take the bait seriously, she should respond, and mock you for your attempt to start another flame war mock fight over nothing....
Good try though, funny to watch you tap dance so much....
Great opening post Abigail. So good of you to seek to help others to see how much "friendlier" it is to live on the high ground, above the pettiness. But as this thread has already turned into what it has, I don't see the change coming here...
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now I see
WhiteDove- What I wrote above was in regard to Abi's originating post on this thread, she's the one who says she doesn't like labels, I just pointed out she uses them too, when it fits her opinions-that's all.
If you want to know what I think - I LIKE LABELS.
In fact I like using wierewill apologist, I think it is perfect for any biblical discussion.
I enjoyed it when wierewill apologists get outed too, in fact I've been known to gloat over it.
Game over try again, WD......
Have a nice day. :)
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cman
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Discourse
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/Discourse
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now I see
I love it that you are trying so hard to draw Dot Matrix into another nonsensical fight, and me too, with no basis or logical progression on either one of them.
I hope she doesn't take the bait seriously, she should respond, and mock you for your attempt to start another flame war mock fight over nothing....
Good try though, funny to watch you tap dance so much....
Cheers!
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cman
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Rocky
Abi,
The solution is SIMPLY -- Do NOT feed the troll.
Do not answer. Do not respond. Do not reply. Do not REASON with.
Just IGNORE it. Consciously. Deliberately. Consistently. Universally.
Nothing more. Nothing less.
Do NOT acknowledge ANY point the troll thinks it's making.
When EVERYONE does this consistently, it will (eventually) work.
It will not necessarily be by banning the troll, but if it (the troll) is ignored by all, if the bait is NEVER taken, it ceases to meet whatever need it represents to the troll.
Period. End of story.
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Ductape
A thread about someone leaving because of the pettiness of the conversations lately and the thread derails and turns petty. No surprise here………… Oh and stalking name calling -_-
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Rocky
Rascal, IGNORING DOES WORK.
Ignoring (aka DON'T FEED THE TROLL) is NOT the same as turning a blind eye.
Ignoring in this case is refusing to meet the unspoken (or sometimes spoken) demand of the troll to play the game by his rules. When NO ONE takes the bait, the troll starves to death. This IS effective and perhaps the most merciful approach overall.
Turning a blind eye is to essentially recognize a behavior that is done for a different reason (for example, Rosie turned a blind eye to Martindale's pervasive sexual harassment in the workplace). The behavior of the violator in that situation, the sexual predator, was NOT being done for the purpose of getting people to engage the predator in verbal sparring. Instead, Rosie's turning a blind eye, in that situation ENABLED the predator to feed his evil lust by using people without detection by many... because Rosie KNEW but didn't speak up and out.
COMPLETELY different motivations of the perpetrators of the unacceptable actions/conduct.
Now I SEE -- PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE TROLL.
Do NOT even respond. Do NOT even acknowledge.
This WILL WORK when it is done consistently.
Now I SEE -- PLEASE do NOT feed the troll.
Do not even address any point the troll posts.
This WILL work when done consistently.
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JustSayNO
EDIT:- nevermind, it would only fuel the fires.
But Abi, I feel ya, take care.
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J0nny Ling0
Great opening post Abigail. So good of you to seek to help others to see how much "friendlier" it is to live on the high ground, above the pettiness. But as this thread has already turned into what it has, I don't see the change coming here...
Vaya con Dios!
JL
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J0nny Ling0
By the way, what happened to the "Where's The Beef?" thread?
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mstar1
That thread about noncensorship-got deleted
do not pass the soap opera forum do not collect $200.00
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excathedra
lol
mstar
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mstar1
Mornin ex -
How you doon? :)
HERE is the audio portion of this thread.
Personally i didnt like the movie the first time I saw it---but now its in endless reruns like Gilligans Island
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HAPe4me
sigh, this is so sad
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doojable
Will It Go Round in Circles(
by Billy Preston and Bruce Fisher
Will it go round in circles
Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky
Will it go round in circles
Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky
I've got a lil' story ain't got no moral
Let the bad guy win every once in a while
I've got a lil' story ain't got no moral
Let the bad guy win every once in a while
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now I see
BTW, Kudos to Paw for closing down that thread!
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pawtucket
I put this thread back on track and the dialogue that WD started is in a separate thread.
White Dove, you have a problem with what somebody said, take it private by PM, them's the rules.
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WhiteDove
Yeah what a great song it most surely will ,life does that way.
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