Another groaner.

[dmiller]

Atlas Shrugged was a novel written by Ayn Rand around 1957.

It dealt with the "non-thinking" segment of society. It's a long read,

but a good book. Waysider's remark was "spot on".

[dmiller]

OK - - - getting back to the "groaner's":

The Wisconsin Farmer:

Paddy is passing by Mick's hay shed one day when through a gap in the door he sees Mick

doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old red Massey Ferguson tractor.

Buttocks clenched he performs a slow pirouette and gently slides off first the right welly,

followed by the left. He hunches his shoulders forward an in a classic striptease move,

lets his bib overall straps fall down from his shoulders to dangle by his hips over his corduroy trousers.

Grabbing both sides of his check shirt he rips it apart to reveal his tea stained vest underneath

and with a final flourish he hurls his flat cap on to a pile of hay.

'What on earth are you doing Mick' says Paddy.

'Jeez Paddy, ye frightened the livin bejasus out of me' says an obviously embarrassed Mick,

'but me and the Missus been having some trouble lately in the bedroom department,

and the Therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor.'

(edited to add - - - Thanks to Bowtwi for that one!) ;)

Edited September 4, 2010 by dmiller

[outandabout]

Did you hear about the dyslexic who sold his soul to Satan?

Edited September 13, 2010 by outandabout

[Broken Arrow]

Do you know what a dyslexic, agnostic insomniac does?

He lies awake all night wondering if there really is a dog.

[mstar1]

A blonde, a brunette, a redhead, a minister, a priest, a rabbi, two giraffes, a duck, a farmer, a lawyer, an accountant, a Mexican, a Chinaman, an Irishman, an American, and a Scotsman walked into a bar. "Now wait just a minute," the bartender said, "What is this, some sort of joke?"

[waysider]

There once was a man who had no body. Yeah, that's right, he was just a head, connected to a pair of shoulders by a neck. Oh, he got along ok. Still, there was always that gnawing thought in the back of his mind that he could do more if he had arms. So, he prayed to God for arms and----- Presto! He had 2 perfectly good arms, complete with a full compliment of fingers and thumbs. And, he was thankful. But, he couldn't help thinking how cool it would be to have legs. Again, he prayed. Next thing you know, he's got a torso, complete with 2 strong legs and 5 toes on each foot. And, he was thankful. Still, there was always that gnawing thought in the back of his mind that he could do more with what he now had. So, he prayed to God for a skateboard and----- Presto! A skateboard appeared on his front porch. He was so excited, he hopped onto it and raced down the driveway, straight into the path of an oncoming tractor-trailer. Next thing he knew, he was standing at Heaven's gate, face to face with St. Peter. "Have you learned anything from all this?" questioned St. Peter. "Yes", said the man. "I should have quit while I was still a head."

Edited September 26, 2010 by waysider