Personality as Doctrine

[Oakspear]

Many of us can think of things that never appeared in a class, never was written in a syllabus or Way Magazine, never was taught by Wierwille or Martindale publically (other than closed meetings maybe) yet were passed off as "The Word" by local leaders or even groups of "believers".

We can argue until the cows come home about whether these things were "official" Way doctrine or were sanctioned by whoever the President was at the time, but one thing is true: the expectation in TWI was that leaders be obeyed and leaders were almost always backed up by higher leadership when complaints were lodged.

Your choices were to obey the leadership and put up with their crap or leave.

I'd just as soon avoid the argument about whether we were "forced" to do anything, just talk about some of the things that were put out there as if they were revelation from Gawd, yet originated merely between the ears of the "leaders".

One I can think of was the ridiculous lengths that one particular BC went to in defining "debt".

My son was at the time working two lowing-paying part-time jobs, the income level at each was low enough that there was no federal tax withheld, but if the combined income had been earned at one job, there probably would have been some withholding. The result was that when he did his taxes he owed some money, maybe about $150. (He was about 20 at the time.

Now a few years before, Howard Allen talked about how he thought it was preferable to break even, or even owe a little a tax time, since that would prevent the IRS from holding your money all year at zero interest to you, which is what happens when you get a refund.

When my son mentioned that he owed some money to the IRS, Mr. BC sat him down and strongly reproved him for being in debt (this was at the height of the Martindale anti-debt crusade). This was presented as handed-down-from-the-heavens Word O'Gawd.

Another one was the same BC's insistance that everyone have a nice looking car. At the time I had 6 children living at home and wasn't making a heck of a lot of money. We had 2 cars, one a small car that I used for work (I was on the road and out of town a lot) and a second, a fake wood-sided wagon for hauling the kids around in that I had paid $500 for. We were saving up every month to upgrade and figured that we could get a nicer one in 18 months. Mr. BC insisted that the state of our car was violating the admonistion to "do all things decent and in order" and that we needed to get the car painted. <_< He harrassed us regularly about it.

neither of these things per se were TWI doctrine, but the TWI annointed leader said these things with the full force of TWI behind him

[Abigail]

Yup, TWI was definitely

THE CULT OF PERSONALITY

(click the link above)

Edited January 11, 2008 by Abigail

[Watered Garden]

I think I saw the height of this stupidity when I was in Family WC at Rome City. We were volunteered to help process tomatoes. This was actually before the official start of the program, but we were there, the tomatoes were there, and we knew what we were doing, actually much better than the person in charge.

Comes time to make salsa. We didn't actually make the salsa but had to watch it cook. The salsa had no garlic and no onion. I politely pointed out what I saw as a glaring oversight, and was promptly informed that Official TWI Salsa NEVER NEVER NEVER contained garlic or onions! Perish the thought! Was I possessed? Did I not realize that THE MAN OF GOD FOR OUR DAY AND TIME AND HOUR absolutely hated garlic and onions?

I then suggested we could make him his own little stash of garlic and onion free salsa, which we could also call tomato sauce, and make normal salsa for everyone else. The supervisor was equally aghast! NO NO NO NO NO! If the MOG hates onions and garlic, then the entire WC must avoid them like the plague.

This left me with two thoughts:

1) The MOG has NO right to impose his personal preferences on the entire world.

2) This is not gonna be the best time of my life.

Fragrantly yours,

WG

[excathedra]

[copenhagen]

I think I follow what you are saying and agree.

During the height of lcm power in the mid 1990s we were family app corp.

I came to hate Thursdays, Corp night was was Wed and every new F*&&*#

Lcm doctrine came at corp night. Well every Thursday I would get a phone call

to explain how messed up I was and that I would be dropped from family corp

if I did not get my sh t together.

Best part was I never heard of these new rules till then and was accountable and

reaping the a// chewing.

copenhagen

[Watered Garden]

Happened to us too, Copenhagen. Post FWC we were told to dis-adopt our son, who was having a lot of behavioral problems. Seems LCM had decided that anyone who had trouble getting pregnant should "focus their energies in other directions" and no longer would he permit adoption. This also had to do with a WC grad's difficult pregnancy and subsequent death due to complications.

However, several years before all this happened, we had adopted our son. The "no adoption" decree had not been doctrine then, not that we would have cared all that much. Now, all of a sudden, we were supposed to have known of this decision by the Great Man of God, even before he made the decision, and were being held responsible and told to throw a troubled child out like a mad dog.

What heartlessness. What an unreasonable bunch of boogers they were!

WG

PS: please be assured we DID NOT comply!

[happyheart]

I think I saw the height of this stupidity when I was in Family WC at Rome City.

WG

Hi Watered Garden,

Your salsa story brought back some memories...

I once was vollunteered to put together packets for WIB. The first day the main guy in charge of this brought in boxes of of papers to be put in folders. When we started to assemble the packets, I realized that materials were not for WIB. It was stuff for welcoming people to HQ and the rules of staying at Founders Hall. I pointed this out to the guy in charge. He said that we needed to keep putting those packets together until we were given further instruction. I went along with it for a while, but it started to bother me since we were supposedly under a deadline to have the WIB packets sent off. So I brought it up again and his response was that this had to be right because Em had given him this stuff and she wouldn't have made a mistake. He then said that the letter welcoming people to HQ simply meant that wherever the Trustees went, the heart of HQ went with them even at a hotel. I started to roll my eyes and walk out to go and find Em and ask her. He followed me out, grabbed my arm and told me that the sin of rebellion was as witch craft. We spent the rest of the day putting together the wrong packets. We were called back in later that night when it was discovered the wrong packets had been put together and had to start all over again. We were there really late. Stupid.

I think I got off track of the subject.... sorry

Edited January 12, 2008 by happyheart

[Ham]

THE MAN OF GOD FOR OUR DAY AND TIME AND HOUR absolutely hated garlic and onions?

I wonder if he hated sunlight and running water and crosses too..

Oh oh.. I forgot.. wooden stakes and villagers too.. especially villagers carrying big wooden stakes.

and hammers, or wooden mallets..

[happyheart]

Happened to us too, Copenhagen. Post FWC we were told to dis-adopt our son, who was having a lot of behavioral problems. Seems LCM had decided that anyone who had trouble getting pregnant should "focus their energies in other directions" and no longer would he permit adoption. This also had to do with a WC grad's difficult pregnancy and subsequent death due to complications.

However, several years before all this happened, we had adopted our son. The "no adoption" decree had not been doctrine then, not that we would have cared all that much. Now, all of a sudden, we were supposed to have known of this decision by the Great Man of God, even before he made the decision, and were being held responsible and told to throw a troubled child out like a mad dog.

What heartlessness. What an unreasonable bunch of boogers they were!

WG

PS: please be assured we DID NOT comply!

Wow, Watered Garden. Just when I think I've heard it all, I hear something worse. That's disgusting they would tell you to dis-adopt your son. Who the hell do these people think they are? What about the teaching where adoption was a bigger commitment than having natural children and that you could give away your natural child before you could give away an adopted child? That really p---es me off. I have step children and if someone ever told me to get rid of them I would be furious. I'm so sorry to hear they did that to you and I hope your son never finds out.

[waysider]

For what it's worth, happyheart, I don't think your post was off topic at all.

It describes a perfect example of the subject at hand.

IMO

[doojable]

There are always the various abuses to not doing the bare minimum.

I don't even remember the supposed scriptural basis for that, but I seem to recall that it wasn't enough to ten minutes early - you had to be ten minutes earlier still.

[happyheart]

For what it's worth, happyheart, I don't think your post was off topic at all.

It describes a perfect example of the subject at hand.

IMO

Thanks Waysider I appreciate that. I want to make sure I'm not being a boor....they're terrible to have at parties.

[happyheart]

I feel sorry for the kids who had to live with the fall out from these personality doctrines. I remember DM once saying in a teaching that L had come home late because the teacher had kept them longer than she said they would. DM called the teacher and told her that because of what the teacher did L was grounded. L got in trouble for something she couldn't control and DM was adamant about her being on time anyway. Yuck. I remember sitting there thinking I would never do that to one of my kids, yet there were other people there nodding in agreement. I could only imagine how angry my daughters would be if I tried to pull that on them. <_<

[WordWolf]

Happened to us too, Copenhagen. Post FWC we were told to dis-adopt our son, who was having a lot of behavioral problems. Seems LCM had decided that anyone who had trouble getting pregnant should "focus their energies in other directions" and no longer would he permit adoption. This also had to do with a WC grad's difficult pregnancy and subsequent death due to complications.

However, several years before all this happened, we had adopted our son. The "no adoption" decree had not been doctrine then, not that we would have cared all that much. Now, all of a sudden, we were supposed to have known of this decision by the Great Man of God, even before he made the decision, and were being held responsible and told to throw a troubled child out like a mad dog.

What heartlessness. What an unreasonable bunch of boogers they were!

WG

PS: please be assured we DID NOT comply!

Wow, Watered Garden. Just when I think I've heard it all, I hear something worse. That's disgusting they would tell you to dis-adopt your son. Who the hell do these people think they are? What about the teaching where adoption was a bigger commitment than having natural children and that you could give away your natural child before you could give away an adopted child? That really p---es me off. I have step children and if someone ever told me to get rid of them I would be furious. I'm so sorry to hear they did that to you and I hope your son never finds out.

That's EXACTLY what I was thinking.

Were you the parent that was given the recommendation to take the kid out into the woods,

thrash him just short of needing a hospital,

then tell him if he stepped out of line again, you'd exterminate him?

I know SOMEBODY said their leadership told them this.

(I'm using my words but their concepts.)

[Watered Garden]

Yep, that was us. Our son was indeed a very troubled youth. We were long time TWIts who thought the love we found in one twig or another would help him. This seemed to work in the Carolinas, but then we went in the FWC. Son told me once FWC for kids was like being a Jew and the staff were the Nazis. He was walloped, whipped, whacked and thumped and no one, not even him, even told us about about it. So he did the only thing he knew; he acted out until we were dismissed.

So we go to the left coast where we know a couple who are WC grads with four obedient children. They offer to help us figure out what's going on with son. Their method of training relies heavily on corporal punishment. The trip to the North Cascades was Mr. Leader's suggestion.

Son is doing better now, finally, but he has a lot of baggage, including some very significant pre-adoption baggage left open from his years in foster care. I love him no matter what and continue to pray for his ultimate healing. He is a very smart, attractive, funny guy.

The best thing I can think of to do with troubled children is pray for them in a good light and then just love the daylights out of them!

My greatest regret is that we didn't leave much sooner. Son and I have talked and he has forgiven me, but forgiving myself for not standing up for him better is going to take a while.

WG

[Eyesopen]

When I was in residence our illustrious leader claimed to be a vegetarian. So we all got to eat vegetarian. He also claimed that we were all too fat and needed sliming. So we all went on a low calorie intake diet. We lost weight and became vegans at the same time.

I think I went from a size 8 to a size 4 or 5 in res. And when I went LEAD I pulled my belt even tighter.

When I got relocated to Gunnison the benevolent leader there was very much a meat and potato kind of guy. So the first day there several of us vegans promptly got food poisoning from all of the pork and had to spend some time in the hospital.

Did any of them ever think any of this stuff through or did they just fly by the seat of their pants?

My greatest regret is that we didn't leave much sooner. Son and I have talked and he has forgiven me, but forgiving myself for not standing up for him better is going to take a while.

God can heal all wounds. Given time and love you will heal also. :)

[happyheart]

So he did the only thing he knew; he acted out until we were dismissed.

He did you a favor. Also, it's good he brought that with him-he knew to stand up for himself. Good for him.

The best thing I can think of to do with troubled children is pray for them in a good light and then just love the daylights out of them!

Right on. You got it. It takes time to recover from what your son went through and it sounds like he's getting there. He's going to be just fine. He's a treasure you found.

My greatest regret is that we didn't leave much sooner. Son and I have talked and he has forgiven me, but forgiving myself for not standing up for him better is going to take a while.

WG

Just the fact that you have been open and honest with him is so great. If you had tried to pretend it didn't happen he would probably be a very angry kid today. I know what you mean about having a hard time forgiving yourself for not standing up for him. You were doing the best you knew, he seems to understands that. I made mistakes with not standing up for one of my kids-I had become confused about some things (non twi related) then realized I was being jerked around. I too had a hard time forgiving myself. But I'm fierce about protecting all of my kids now-and that has helped me to forgive myself.

Those leaders in charge of the FWC really showed just how ill equiped they were for all their bragging and self promotion. Talked about healing but were clueless about it. They were so inept they couldn't even help a hurting child. Rather than acknowledge how dumb they were they blamed the child. What a bunch of cowards.

You sound like an awesome Parent to me, Watered Garden.

[GeorgeStGeorge]

Gee, my story isn't nearly that horrible, but I think it illustrates the point.

One fine day, LCM taught that the only reason for a space program is military dominance. I'm not sure exactly what part of his intestine he pulled that from, but I know it made me chuckle. I think it also had something to do with making sure the commies didn't nuke us. I could usually let such foolishness slide, but if I was asked about what I thought, I always gave a truthful answer. I pointed out that if the US gets nuked, it will probablky be with a bomb brought into (or made in) the US. The Russians and Chinese have nothing to gain by bombing us. As for a space program, Psalm 19:1 is a perfectly good reason.

This "rebellion" on my part was another one of the stones they threw at me at my kangaroo court. I suppose I should have pointed out that my TC was working for NASA and clearly wasn't involved in a missile defense system.

George

[washn'wear]

I can so relate to this. I was a BC in west by god texas and our fearless leader said to me once I got an office job that paid half of what my painting/wallpaper jobs paid..."well, now isn't that more like it for a woman" Talk about full of c rap!

[Eyesopen]

I can so relate to this. I was a BC in west by god texas and our fearless leader said to me once I got an office job that paid half of what my painting/wallpaper jobs paid..."well, now isn't that more like it for a woman" Talk about full of c rap!

Grrrrr!!!

[frank123lol]

There are always the various abuses to not doing the bare minimum.

I don't even remember the supposed scriptural basis for that, but I seem to recall that it wasn't enough to ten minutes early - you had to be ten minutes earlier still.

Happened to me,So I came really early,Then was reamed for being too early!!

So I said you told me to be early so here I am,Of course I was put to work setting up!!

Could not please them no matter what you tried..

[Bramble]

Gosh at my Household fellowship you needed to be no earlier than 10 minutes--or you sat in your car.

Also, you needed to show up in the winter wearing a hat. Had too.

Oh--and baby gates indicate you are a lazy mom and were not allowed.

[Watered Garden]

Straight from between the sanctified lips of the MOGFODAT: "It is impossible to obey God without first obeying your leadership." This on a SNS tape not too long after we left. I thought, man if Peter and the other apostles had obeyed that little directive there would be no Christians left. Remember in Acts: Peter stood up with the others and said "We ought to obey God rather than men."

Guess he would've been kicked out of TWI for saying that to LCM!

WG

[Shifra]

I can "testify" that Watered Garden is indeed an awesome mom. My family was in residence with hers, and we both had to protect our kids from daily abuses there.

This is a little off-topic, but in the same way that a lot of Way doctrine was defined by certain personal preferences among Way leaders ...

In a very similar way, the teachings on "spiritual suspicion" opened up a whole new dimension of personal preference which could be used against the peon believers. If a fellowship coordinator or Corps person didn't like you, he could get rid of you very quickly by simply claiming "spiritual suspicion".

In residence we had a twig coordinator who came from a wealthy over-educated background. Upon graduation from Family Corps, he and his equally snooty wife were assigned to be State Coordinators in a western state. Unfortunately, another of our Corps sisters (a single mom with a little girl) was assigned to be their secretary or nanny or some-such thing, which meant that she and her daughter would be living in the same house as this stuck-up couple. Well, the single gal was neither pretty nor educated, not a stylish dresser or articulate speaker. Soon after leaving Rome City, we learned that this new State Coordinator had marked and avoided his secretary based on "spiritual suspicion". This girl had a heart of gold, loved God, and was a decent mom. She got the boot because this guy and his pretty wife didn't want such an un-glamorous person living in their home. Those of us who knew the single mom were appalled.

Other doctrines of personal taste: Black pepper is bad; kelp is good. All pets should attend obedience training - a doctrine later replaced by "no pets". If oil drips from your car, your believing is to blame. The kzillion things which were said to be "dog-whistles for devil spirits". And onions? Oh how I remember airing out the buildings before LCM would visit, because God forbid that he should smell any onions!!

And does anyone remember that Corps Night confrontation, when a lady at Rome City had ... gasp and horror ... hung LCM's clothes in his closet without separating and color coding the shirts and pants? It became doctrine the very next day.

We were all crazy back then. God forgive us.

[Oakspear]

Also, you needed to show up in the winter wearing a hat. Had too.

I think that this one came straight from Martindale. "If it's cold enough for a coat, it's cold enough for a hat."