Considering the theme "65 years of twi dirt...", it would seem appropriate to have a short opening film overviewing the sexual proclivities of Vic the predator. Perhaps some interviews with victims followed by a guided tour of the motorcoach?...An instrumental version of "he touched me" could be playing in the background.
water glass - Can be clear ONLY if vodka, or Everclear is in it. Otherwise, it has to be a cup so that you can't see the drambuie or other dark liquor.
Bible - well it only looks like a Bible. It's pages are really cut out and lined not only with notes but those "special photos" of the teacher's pet. It's okay, because the teacher is spiritual enough to handle it.
OK......good start.......but we've only got 2 weeks to get it together.............so........keep it flowing.......'' like a river"....or two,....sunesis......hehe......
Good point outthere.........get the research team together........i'm sure we can find a text somewhere where cleanliness IS next to godliness!!........it's just got to be there ....."in the original".............post on greasespotters!!
I think Rosie should give a speech...(with Donna at her side)...
...Let her proclaim (with a straight face), how they are the holders of truth. They should shout with excitement the prevailing truth of the prevailing household...the explosion of the word over the world...as all eyes turn to New Knoxville to hear the great woman of God speak with charisma and conviction...stirring the audience with her captivating oratory skills...let her pound her fist upon the podium of righteousness...
...give the people a vision...let them embrace the words of the dyke...let them eat cake.
I think Rosie should give a speech...(with Donna at her side)...
...Let her proclaim (with a straight face), how they are the holders of truth. They should shout with excitement the prevailing truth of the prevailing household...the explosion of the word over the world...as all eyes turn to New Knoxville to hear the great woman of God speak with charisma and conviction...stirring the audience with her captivating oratory skills...let her pound her fist upon the podium of righteousness...
...give the people a vision...let them embrace the words of the dyke...let them eat cake.
The theme of "Cleanliness Is Next to Godliness" is perfect for the Weigh.
All of that nit picky energy can be focused for an entire year, the endless desire to get everything just right and just so, in the belief that when all the physicals are accounted for and made right the spirituals can prevail.
"for ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess."
Theme studies in Greek! = full of = ek! (eeeek!) check your Bullingers and pen this on - "from out of"
Possible translations = "...but (what is within) comes from or out of extortion and excess"!
Break Out discussion topics! "What's in my cup and where did it come from?"
Theme Commemorative Cups - free to all standing Fellowship participants with verfiable financial gifts totalling 15 per cent or more of your net income! Get 'em while they're clean!
Excath and I will rescue the German Shpherd from the Christian Family and sex class, he can be our mascot. Sunesis, we may need your help he gets weird around two women.
But seriously, folks, you have it all wrong. LCM said Cleanliness IS Godliness. It is, like, one of the most important things ever. Think of all the devil spirits you can simply clorox away!
If Cleanliness IS Godliness - then by all means, let's purge out the vermin!
Well.... all except for the favored vermin. You know, the vermin who have special privileges because they have money or talent (or both.)
Make sure the Fox is guarding the chicks... er...chickens... Then make sure that fox has enough people around to cover (lie ;)) and tell everyone how grateful they should be for the opportunity to live in the coop... er.... Walls of Zion.
As the mighty Rosie comes to the stage, all rise with respect and fall to their knees in deep devotion.
"Thank-you Rosie, for giving us these walls of Zion that we may hide rest here. You are so wonderful!"
"We love you, Rosie! You've given us a place to become clean and whole!"
"Rosie is King!"
Meanwhile, backstage.... Rosie's true and most loyal minions are milling about... they know they are safe because the Mighty Rosie will cover for them at all costs.
They stand and sing, "Glory to Her Name."
During the ceremony, an annoucement is made:
"There will be chicken and lamb served at dinner tonight...Will the following people please report to the kitchen...)
"Oh! and we need someone to please volunteer to repair the sheep's clothing... It seems some of it is wearing thin...)
"for ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess."
Perhaps a bottle of dish soap in the fountain would be appropriate for their festivities. Might not clean the scum beneath it, but if someone chose lemon fresh something or another, it would smell a little nicer.
Besides, it would provide some entertainment for the evening.
* 5:00 a.m. -- Scrub toilets, mop floors & SIT to humble yourself before the Lord, make bed and get going on the day
* 5:30 a.m. -- Run 2 miles
* 6:00 a.m. -- Prayer and manifestations
* 6:30 a.m. -- you have 15 mintues to shower before breakfast and those on kitchen duty will shower after everyone has eaten - make sure breakfast is ready for everyone - Goodness forbid that someone may have to grab a bowl themselves -- this is SERVICE PEOPLE!
*6:45 a.m. -- breakfast
* 7:00 a.m. -- report to private bible studies - kitchen duty - you have 10 min. to clean everything spotless and 10 min. to shower. Do this efficiently and for God
Dress appropriately for festivities beginning at 8:00 a.m. SHARP - no shorts/t-shirts -- slacks and a nice shirt are more fitting even though it is 95 degree weather out -- Women wear skirts with panty hose and pearls to look feminine for our men. We must look respectable for God. Yes you will be sitting in uncomfortable stringed chairs in the hot sun -- but this is for GOD people. Can you spiritually do it? Bring at least 15% of your ABS which there will be a horn of plenty available upon entering -- please drop of ABS there.
*Those on festival duty -- make sure MOG/WOG has everything required -- don't miss anything spirtually -- make heaven and earth move for every specific detail.
Now -- settle in for an entire day of WORD you can't get anywhere else. There will be a 30 min. lunch break and 12 hours of teachings back to back. One - 5 min. bathroom break per 1.5 hours. Control your children - no crying or whining -- people are here to learn the WORD.
You are so blessed to be here and celebrate with us - You're the BEST!
*8:00 p.m. - A light dinner (greens and berries)
*8:30 p.m. - clean up grounds and restring chairs for tomorrows event
*9:00 p.m. - you now have 60 minutes of free time -- when you are finished with SERVICE - during this time name one item that should be cleared out of your living space.
5 guilt-free ways to rip-off your fellow christians.
"why i am qualified to be the ceo of any fortune 500 corporation".......an interpretive dance by our beloved "triple threat" (stumble, bumble and fumble) dancing 2nd prez, L(oada) C(rap) martindale.
How to cook your books.......exclusive new information from some recently discovered ancient manuscripts of the book of numbers.
Shameless begging made easy........practical keys on raising corps tuition.......sign up now for a free copy of our mailing list before it shrinks into non-existence!
How to ruin your life by becoming debt-free.........special appearance by twi's leading economic advisor, alfred e. neumann.
Also, available for the first time, in honor of our 65th........our newst publication "lying, thieving weasels: a brief history of twi's trustees from 1942-2007.........enjoy 65 years of BS as only your trustees can dish out!!
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Sudo
DWBH,
Who are we to suggest ideas to Rosie, the man of God (and possibly Donna as well?) for our day and time? Reprobates we all are for leaving the household of Gawd Almighty, right?? It's been 65 years, again, right? So what to celebrate? Why the answer is obvious my man.. we celebrate Spiritual Viagra©!! To keep the men (and she-men) leaders of TWI continually sticking it to the followers and ex-followers of TWI for 65 years. Make 'em feel guilty for abandoning "The Truth". Make 'em think they've been doomed to be a greasespot by midnight. Take their tithes and give them torment in return. Yeah.. Spiritual Viagra... the drug that keeps on giving.
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GrouchoMarxJr
Considering the theme "65 years of twi dirt...", it would seem appropriate to have a short opening film overviewing the sexual proclivities of Vic the predator. Perhaps some interviews with victims followed by a guided tour of the motorcoach?...An instrumental version of "he touched me" could be playing in the background.
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doojable
I'll do the podium set -up:
"mints";) = drug of the teacher's choice
water glass - Can be clear ONLY if vodka, or Everclear is in it. Otherwise, it has to be a cup so that you can't see the drambuie or other dark liquor.
Bible - well it only looks like a Bible. It's pages are really cut out and lined not only with notes but those "special photos" of the teacher's pet. It's okay, because the teacher is spiritual enough to handle it.
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Abigail
Copied this here for Don'tWorryBeHappy :)
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waysider
Perhaps the morning festivities could start with an old fashioned "hill-side sing".
First, let us begin with "I'll Be Seeing You In Old Familia Places".
Hit it Dorothy!
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polar bear
Oki doki-I'm in.
I'll handle the sing songs-
Straddling all the promises.
The Truth has been Marched On.
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doojable
Songs:
"How Long Has It Been?"
"Goosestep Christian Soldiers"
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polar bear
An exciting new announcement, we have a new class=
"How to rightly divide mints"
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Out There
I have looked up cleanliness before in Websters and it is NOT next to Godliness. I found that cleanliness is next to cleavage.
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DontWorryBeHappy
OK......good start.......but we've only got 2 weeks to get it together.............so........keep it flowing.......'' like a river"....or two,....sunesis......hehe......
Good point outthere.........get the research team together........i'm sure we can find a text somewhere where cleanliness IS next to godliness!!........it's just got to be there ....."in the original".............post on greasespotters!!
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doojable
Ladies and Gentlejerks,
Open your "Sting Along the Ways" to #65 Standing on the Premises."
That was wunnnerful!
I stand before you, sitting behind you, about to tell you something which I know nothing about...
And now, please be blessed by the musical mishandlings by the band. "Harry Snot and His Nine Nasty Nose-Pickers"...
Plenty of seats... (You'll sit on the floor. ;))
Free admission... You'll pay at the door.
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GrouchoMarxJr
I think Rosie should give a speech...(with Donna at her side)...
...Let her proclaim (with a straight face), how they are the holders of truth. They should shout with excitement the prevailing truth of the prevailing household...the explosion of the word over the world...as all eyes turn to New Knoxville to hear the great woman of God speak with charisma and conviction...stirring the audience with her captivating oratory skills...let her pound her fist upon the podium of righteousness...
...give the people a vision...let them embrace the words of the dyke...let them eat cake.
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dmiller
Yup -- and then perhaps they could sing I DID IT MY WAY.
:)
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socks
The theme of "Cleanliness Is Next to Godliness" is perfect for the Weigh.
All of that nit picky energy can be focused for an entire year, the endless desire to get everything just right and just so, in the belief that when all the physicals are accounted for and made right the spirituals can prevail.
"for ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess."
Theme studies in Greek! = full of = ek! (eeeek!) check your Bullingers and pen this on - "from out of"
Possible translations = "...but (what is within) comes from or out of extortion and excess"!
Break Out discussion topics! "What's in my cup and where did it come from?"
Theme Commemorative Cups - free to all standing Fellowship participants with verfiable financial gifts totalling 15 per cent or more of your net income! Get 'em while they're clean!
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Dot Matrix
Excath and I will rescue the German Shpherd from the Christian Family and sex class, he can be our mascot. Sunesis, we may need your help he gets weird around two women.
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Dot Matrix
Ring around the "minister" collar -- how to remove the destain
An historic view of the birth, growth and current state of TWI
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pawtucket
When the Clothes are being Laundered (sung to the tune of When the Roll is called up Yonder)
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Bramble
Hey, I know harmony for the laundry song!
But seriously, folks, you have it all wrong. LCM said Cleanliness IS Godliness. It is, like, one of the most important things ever. Think of all the devil spirits you can simply clorox away!
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doojable
If Cleanliness IS Godliness - then by all means, let's purge out the vermin!
Well.... all except for the favored vermin. You know, the vermin who have special privileges because they have money or talent (or both.)
Make sure the Fox is guarding the chicks... er...chickens... Then make sure that fox has enough people around to cover (lie ;)) and tell everyone how grateful they should be for the opportunity to live in the coop... er.... Walls of Zion.
As the mighty Rosie comes to the stage, all rise with respect and fall to their knees in deep devotion.
"Thank-you Rosie, for giving us these walls of Zion that we may hide rest here. You are so wonderful!"
"We love you, Rosie! You've given us a place to become clean and whole!"
"Rosie is King!"
Meanwhile, backstage.... Rosie's true and most loyal minions are milling about... they know they are safe because the Mighty Rosie will cover for them at all costs.
They stand and sing, "Glory to Her Name."
During the ceremony, an annoucement is made:
"There will be chicken and lamb served at dinner tonight...Will the following people please report to the kitchen...)
"Oh! and we need someone to please volunteer to repair the sheep's clothing... It seems some of it is wearing thin...)
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Ham
Perhaps a bottle of dish soap in the fountain would be appropriate for their festivities. Might not clean the scum beneath it, but if someone chose lemon fresh something or another, it would smell a little nicer.
Besides, it would provide some entertainment for the evening.
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doojable
The President' Theme Song
Sung to the tune of "Peace Like a River"
I need pieces of liver,
Pieces of liver,
Pieces of liver
To make me whole...
I need pieces of liver,
Won't you deliver?
Pieces of liver
To make me whole...
I'll put Joy in the fountain
Joy in the fountain
Joy in the fountain
to make me whole...
I'll put Joy in the fountain
The bubbles!
Count them!
Joy in the fountain will make me whole...
It doesn't matter
It doesn't matter
Whatever gets taught
Will make me whole...
It doesn't matter
It's all just chatter
As long as I'm in charge
I'll be whole...
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Outfield
* 5:00 a.m. -- Scrub toilets, mop floors & SIT to humble yourself before the Lord, make bed and get going on the day
* 5:30 a.m. -- Run 2 miles
* 6:00 a.m. -- Prayer and manifestations
* 6:30 a.m. -- you have 15 mintues to shower before breakfast and those on kitchen duty will shower after everyone has eaten - make sure breakfast is ready for everyone - Goodness forbid that someone may have to grab a bowl themselves -- this is SERVICE PEOPLE!
*6:45 a.m. -- breakfast
* 7:00 a.m. -- report to private bible studies - kitchen duty - you have 10 min. to clean everything spotless and 10 min. to shower. Do this efficiently and for God
Dress appropriately for festivities beginning at 8:00 a.m. SHARP - no shorts/t-shirts -- slacks and a nice shirt are more fitting even though it is 95 degree weather out -- Women wear skirts with panty hose and pearls to look feminine for our men. We must look respectable for God. Yes you will be sitting in uncomfortable stringed chairs in the hot sun -- but this is for GOD people. Can you spiritually do it? Bring at least 15% of your ABS which there will be a horn of plenty available upon entering -- please drop of ABS there.
*Those on festival duty -- make sure MOG/WOG has everything required -- don't miss anything spirtually -- make heaven and earth move for every specific detail.
Now -- settle in for an entire day of WORD you can't get anywhere else. There will be a 30 min. lunch break and 12 hours of teachings back to back. One - 5 min. bathroom break per 1.5 hours. Control your children - no crying or whining -- people are here to learn the WORD.
You are so blessed to be here and celebrate with us - You're the BEST!
*8:00 p.m. - A light dinner (greens and berries)
*8:30 p.m. - clean up grounds and restring chairs for tomorrows event
*9:00 p.m. - you now have 60 minutes of free time -- when you are finished with SERVICE - during this time name one item that should be cleared out of your living space.
*10:00 p.m. - lights out!
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doojable
At the break we will be handing out our "65th Anniversary Blinders"
They are sure to bless your life and keep you on the narrow way...
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DontWorryBeHappy
Word in business suggestions.......
5 guilt-free ways to rip-off your fellow christians.
"why i am qualified to be the ceo of any fortune 500 corporation".......an interpretive dance by our beloved "triple threat" (stumble, bumble and fumble) dancing 2nd prez, L(oada) C(rap) martindale.
How to cook your books.......exclusive new information from some recently discovered ancient manuscripts of the book of numbers.
Shameless begging made easy........practical keys on raising corps tuition.......sign up now for a free copy of our mailing list before it shrinks into non-existence!
How to ruin your life by becoming debt-free.........special appearance by twi's leading economic advisor, alfred e. neumann.
Starting your very own 501©3 corporation.....using unscrupulous and unscriptural strategies, you'll learn how to extort 15% or more of your followers' gross incomes without ever paying taxes yourself!!......special bonus strategies on convincing followers to hand over valuable family inheritances to you and your fellow "trustees"!!..........(please note:this session is closed to the irs and all other government agencies!)
Also, available for the first time, in honor of our 65th........our newst publication "lying, thieving weasels: a brief history of twi's trustees from 1942-2007.........enjoy 65 years of BS as only your trustees can dish out!!
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