ORLANDO, Fla. -- A squirrel attacked up to three people at a day care playground Wednesday.
The victims included a child and a highway patrol trooper.
The boy's name is not being released. He is being treated at Arnold Palmer Children's Hospital.
Click here to find out more!
Day care center workers said the boy was bitten nine times.
Fire Rescue and Animal Control responded to the incident.
A highway patrol trooper was bitten before the boy, and there are conflicting reports saying a female worker was bitten or that she fell and scratched her arm.
None of the injuries seem to be life-threatening, officials said. "Apparently the squirrel was completely out of control" said highway patrolman Lazlo Slocum. "When I walked into the kids play area looking for the squirrel, as I passed a tree on my right and while looking up, all of the sudden there was a screeching blinding blur coming straight for my face! I tried to cover up, but, it was too late! The little horror attached himself to my face like a sucker fish on a glob of night crawlers! And he was clawin' me and bitin' me as I rolled to the ground, screaming in agony! Finally I managed to grab him and throw him off, and when he hit the ground, he ran up a tree and began to scold me. I held my gun on him though, waitin' for my back up to arrive. I wanted to shoot him right then and there, but thought better of it, with the kids around and all. Too bad I didn't though, because that's when he attacked the boy".
Slocum, still dazed by the attack and nursing his facial wounds and trying to hold his gun up, failed to notice a boy standing nearby holding a peanut butter sandwich up in the air towards the squirrel as if in a peace offering. In fact, by this time, the squirrel, "chirring" in a friendly way, had come down the tree trunk toward the boy in a friendly manner to take the tid bit from his hand. When it became clear to Slocum what was happening, his loudly shouted; "Nooooooooo"! echoed off of the nearby trees and buildings. But it was too late. The squirrel jumped through the air from the trunk, and scrambled up the boys leg and tried to bite him in a place that no boy wants to get bitten! Yeah, a different kind of nuts we suppose. Luckily, the boy turned just in time, and was only bitten numerous times on his right but-tocks. His screaming still haunts those who heard it. Officer Lazlo Slocum, still with gun in hand aimed and fired three quick shots as the squirrel raced for the bushes, but, to no avail. Missed him. The squirrel got away, leaving the spectators and the wounded to the only sound that could be heard: The nearby sound of the Mocking Bird.
"It seemed as if there was something diabolical in the whole incident. Absolutely diabolical I tell ya", said Earlene Shifflet the playground monitor and the one who made the initial 9-1-1 call. "It was like the animals was sendin' us a message or somethin. And, that squirrel reminded me of the one in that Ray Stevens song that tore up that church down in that sleepy little town of Pascagoula. Weird! And man, that damn Mockin' Bird really creeped me out when it was all over. What'd we ever do to them?"
And so, the people of Orlando are on the look out for what may be one of the most dangerous squirrels to date. The officer and boy will undergo the usual rabies vaccinations, since the squirrel could not be examined. Could this be the beginnings of another version of Hitchcock's "The Birds"?
And so, what gives? Ham? Please explain. Enquiring minds want to know
Well, it has since been reported that the squirrel had the characteristics of those normally found in New Knoxville, Ohio!
And so, the mods can delete this thread, since I copied it and pasted it over on a new thread in "Open". Report it, eh? Okay. But, I don't see a "report" link. Maybe I'll just leave it lay...
And so, what gives? Ham? Please explain. Enquiring minds want to know
Law enforcement is missing it's "golden opportunity". Sure, a few kids might get mauled.. officers maimed.. but what if.. what if.
They could covertly train massive armies of these little bits of fury on four legs.. and set them on a mission. Run gangs out of Orlando, Tampa, Detroit..
Umm, yeah. Lazlo Slocum. I made that name up. Only one third of the article is genuine. I made the rest up just for Mr. Ham, our resident squirrel who has been masquerading as a human. I like to tell stowrees ya know. Couldn't resist...
Law enforcement is missing it's "golden opportunity". Sure, a few kids might get mauled.. officers maimed.. but what if.. what if.
They could covertly train massive armies of these little bits of fury on four legs.. and set them on a mission. Run gangs out of Orlando, Tampa, Detroit..
Or they could send them in to Iran as spies. This is a "real" news story.
Best quote from the MSNBC news story: "Still, the squirrels that breached the Iranian border carrying sensitive spying equipment must have been nuts."
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doojable
Attack of the Killer Squirrels...
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Ham
Well, officially, I disavow all knowledge of the actions of my so called "cousins"
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Belle
That's down the road from me and let me tell you, when I saw that on the news I was skeered!! Thought Ham and his posse had come to invade the city!
Hopefully these guys will be able to bring some law and order back to Orlando.
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J0nny Ling0
http://www.wesh.com/news/14052662/detail.html
Squirrel Attacks At Day Care
ORLANDO, Fla. -- A squirrel attacked up to three people at a day care playground Wednesday.
The victims included a child and a highway patrol trooper.
The boy's name is not being released. He is being treated at Arnold Palmer Children's Hospital.
Click here to find out more!
Day care center workers said the boy was bitten nine times.
Fire Rescue and Animal Control responded to the incident.
A highway patrol trooper was bitten before the boy, and there are conflicting reports saying a female worker was bitten or that she fell and scratched her arm.
None of the injuries seem to be life-threatening, officials said. "Apparently the squirrel was completely out of control" said highway patrolman Lazlo Slocum. "When I walked into the kids play area looking for the squirrel, as I passed a tree on my right and while looking up, all of the sudden there was a screeching blinding blur coming straight for my face! I tried to cover up, but, it was too late! The little horror attached himself to my face like a sucker fish on a glob of night crawlers! And he was clawin' me and bitin' me as I rolled to the ground, screaming in agony! Finally I managed to grab him and throw him off, and when he hit the ground, he ran up a tree and began to scold me. I held my gun on him though, waitin' for my back up to arrive. I wanted to shoot him right then and there, but thought better of it, with the kids around and all. Too bad I didn't though, because that's when he attacked the boy".
Slocum, still dazed by the attack and nursing his facial wounds and trying to hold his gun up, failed to notice a boy standing nearby holding a peanut butter sandwich up in the air towards the squirrel as if in a peace offering. In fact, by this time, the squirrel, "chirring" in a friendly way, had come down the tree trunk toward the boy in a friendly manner to take the tid bit from his hand. When it became clear to Slocum what was happening, his loudly shouted; "Nooooooooo"! echoed off of the nearby trees and buildings. But it was too late. The squirrel jumped through the air from the trunk, and scrambled up the boys leg and tried to bite him in a place that no boy wants to get bitten! Yeah, a different kind of nuts we suppose. Luckily, the boy turned just in time, and was only bitten numerous times on his right but-tocks. His screaming still haunts those who heard it. Officer Lazlo Slocum, still with gun in hand aimed and fired three quick shots as the squirrel raced for the bushes, but, to no avail. Missed him. The squirrel got away, leaving the spectators and the wounded to the only sound that could be heard: The nearby sound of the Mocking Bird.
"It seemed as if there was something diabolical in the whole incident. Absolutely diabolical I tell ya", said Earlene Shifflet the playground monitor and the one who made the initial 9-1-1 call. "It was like the animals was sendin' us a message or somethin. And, that squirrel reminded me of the one in that Ray Stevens song that tore up that church down in that sleepy little town of Pascagoula. Weird! And man, that damn Mockin' Bird really creeped me out when it was all over. What'd we ever do to them?"
And so, the people of Orlando are on the look out for what may be one of the most dangerous squirrels to date. The officer and boy will undergo the usual rabies vaccinations, since the squirrel could not be examined. Could this be the beginnings of another version of Hitchcock's "The Birds"?
And so, what gives? Ham? Please explain. Enquiring minds want to know
Edited by Jonny LingoLink to comment
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J0nny Ling0
Well, it has since been reported that the squirrel had the characteristics of those normally found in New Knoxville, Ohio!
And so, the mods can delete this thread, since I copied it and pasted it over on a new thread in "Open". Report it, eh? Okay. But, I don't see a "report" link. Maybe I'll just leave it lay...
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GarthP2000
... the squirrel was posseesssssssseedddd!
;)
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bulwinkl
"Most bad Tempered Rodent"
Obviously a relative
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Ham
"run away, run away.."
A friend of mine claims that the animals will inherit the world after the oil is gone..
:)
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Ham
Naw.. just probably smoking a little pot or something..
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Edi
Too funny!
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Ham
Law enforcement is missing it's "golden opportunity". Sure, a few kids might get mauled.. officers maimed.. but what if.. what if.
They could covertly train massive armies of these little bits of fury on four legs.. and set them on a mission. Run gangs out of Orlando, Tampa, Detroit..
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Ham
Even better, turn them loose on Washington.. they'd drive out the unsavory political element.
George Bushytail wouldn't stand a chance..
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ex70sHouston
Squirrels are best used as targets.
Most places people use a 12 ga shootgun. Around here we just use a .22.
If you are really hungrey they taste OK.
Lets face it, they are just tree rats.
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Ham
*eeeeek*
:o
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nyunknown
WOW! I did not know squirrels can be so dangerious!
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Ham
OH yes. Quite dangerous, especially if you give one a light saber.
Scores of bystanding civilians were wounded and maimed during this ferocious battle between two Jedi Squirrels and one Squirrel Sith Lord.
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nyunknown
Oh was that you down in florida? I senced this was you or was one of your brothers?
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Ham
Naw.. that's a Groundhog cousin. I think it's Phil, blowing away an early spring..
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waysider
Lazlo Slocum??? :unsure:
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J0nny Ling0
Umm, yeah. Lazlo Slocum. I made that name up. Only one third of the article is genuine. I made the rest up just for Mr. Ham, our resident squirrel who has been masquerading as a human. I like to tell stowrees ya know. Couldn't resist...
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wrdsandwrks
Or they could send them in to Iran as spies. This is a "real" news story.
Best quote from the MSNBC news story: "Still, the squirrels that breached the Iranian border carrying sensitive spying equipment must have been nuts."
Iran's spying squirrels:
http://worldblog.msnbc.msn.com/archive/200.../20/280529.aspx
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excathedra
i'm tired of squirrels
(not hammer)
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Ham
:)
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GarthP2000
This whole thing is squirrely.
.
.
.
.
((crickets chirping))
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