Female Sharks...Beware!

[Bumpy]

Hmmmm....is that what you are worried about? I have some really cool cat shaped contacts that I could wear for you. But I still bite.

Great description of my ex tho!

Maybe we should compare xx's! Mine was Spanish with the catholic blood of the Conquisto running through her "shark" veins! It was death 'till we parted"! I'm still looking for "body parts" I might have lost!!

[Ham]

Eyes, maybe you ought to try something slightly more subtle. A persistent knock on the door, ringing of the door bell..

"who's there?"

"Candy Gram.."

[Eyesopen]

Eyes, maybe you ought to try something slightly more subtle. A persistent knock on the door, ringing of the door bell..

"who's there?"

"Candy Gram.."

I do that when I'm bored. It's fun watching their excited little faces turn to shock and then unbelief and then horror, that's when you snap the picture and bite! Wierd I just had twi flashbacks....except I wasnt the shark! :o :blink:

Maybe we should compare xx's! Mine was Spanish with the catholic blood of the Conquisto running through her "shark" veins! It was death 'till we parted"! I'm still looking for "body parts" I might have lost!!

The similarities are really scary...my ex was Mexican but I think the Indian blood was really head hunter blood from South America! A shark is a soft fuzzy teddy bear in comparison! It really did give new meaning to "till death do you part" <_<

[Bumpy]

I do that when I'm bored. It's fun watching their excited little faces turn to shock and then unbelief and then horror, that's when you snap the picture and bite! Wierd I just had twi flashbacks....except I wasnt the shark! :o :blink:

The similarities are really scary...my ex was Mexican but I think the Indian blood was really head hunter blood from South America! A shark is a soft fuzzy teddy bear in comparison! It really did give new meaning to "till death do you part" <_<

Was it one of those "Wayward" group weddings presided over by Rev. Meathead? God forbid...the double whammy!!

[Belle]

I’ve heard tell the “Eyes” of the shark are cold and dark, reflecting the death they inflict upon their unsuspecting victims. As they tear into the flesh of their prey, they show no mercy, no thoughts of compassion. Just cold, dead blackness reflecting from a soul created millions of years before human life began.

All the more reason to avoid setting limits for us, no?

And if you want to talk exes.... try being married to a cop... and angry cop who's a sharpshooter and master sniper. :blink: changing the locks on the doors isn't enough to make ya feel safe.

Now, weren't the men providing chum for us tonight?

[Bumpy]

All the more reason to avoid setting limits for us, no?

And if you want to talk exes.... try being married to a cop... and angry cop who's a sharpshooter and master sniper. :blink: changing the locks on the doors isn't enough to make ya feel safe.

Now, weren't the men providing chum for us tonight?

Scarlet Honey...sounds like you married the wrong cop! Might have been bad for your “sense” of humor or as well? But, being a master sniper, I guess he either missed or forgot to pull the trigger?? <_<

And who might I ask, would be “setting limits for us”...pas moi!

I’m definitely not going to jump into that tank!!

But maybe we can be “chums”!! Bump

[doojable]

Scarlet Honey...sounds like you married the wrong cop! Might have been bad for your “sense” of humor or as well? But, being a master sniper, I guess he either missed or forgot to pull the trigger?? <_<

And who might I ask, would be “setting limits for us”...pas moi!

I’m definitely not going to jump into that tank!!

But maybe we can be “chums”!! Bump

I'd say you're in it up to your eyeballs...

"Dinner is served."

[Eyesopen]

I'd say you're in it up to your eyeballs...

"Dinner is served."

Dinner! Did the chef say "Dinner is served?" Yum Bumpy tacos! Where's my hot sauce?

Belle- You want me to bite 'em for you? Not all us cops are the same, some of us still know where the lines are drawn and we don't cross 'em no matter how good a shot we are. (And yes I'm pretty handy with a few weapons myself, but you missed that thread.) Seriously it is not kosher to use your badge or your training to intimidate or abuse innocent people. Don't get me wrong sometimes you gotta puff up a bit to back the jerks down, but if a cop is making a target out of someone that cannot or would not harm them then they are nothing more than cowards, and yes I would be happy to say that to anyones face. Come to think of it I have.

[doojable]

That was the first course...

Bumpy, don't go swimming for a few days...;)

[Eyesopen]

I’ve heard tell the “Eyes” of the shark are cold and dark, reflecting the death they inflict upon their unsuspecting victims. As they tear into the flesh of their prey, they show no mercy, no thoughts of compassion. Just cold, dead blackness reflecting from a soul created millions of years before human life began.

You know I just thought of someone else that matches this description, especially the "cold, dead blackness".

[Bumpy]

Ladies & Lady Sharks!! It’s morning tea time over here. How was your dinner chez Bumpy? I was actually expecting more blood in the water, so maybe you all over ate on the way to visit me!

Remember in all your “female” pain...this department is entitled, silly, which translates here to funny, meaning try not to take yourselves too seriously because someone might have a laugh at your expense. Especially moi! There’s always the prayer department to resolve your internal (shark) problems.

And Dooj. darling, you give me the “biting” feeling of someone who still has an ax to grind? <_<

[doojable]

And Dooj. darling, you give me the “biting” feeling of someone who still has an ax to grind? <_<

So Bump, you want some croissants with that tea? Or do you just want to talk?

I'll even serve it in my silly clown shoes and big red wig.

But - if you're itching to stir the pot, I'm putting you to work on gravy detail. Eyes wakes up really hungry.

[Eyesopen]

So Bump, you want some croissants with that tea? Or do you just want to talk?

I'll even serve it in my silly clown shoes and big red wig.

But - if you're itching to stir the pot, I'm putting you to work on gravy detail. Eyes wakes up really hungry.

Well I dont know about any silly clown shoes or big red wigs...had me one of them guys once...kinda sour tasting, I think it was all the makeup.

It is 6am on the West Coast the water is warm, a light rain is falling and I'm hungry! So is the kitchen open? :P

[Belle]

Au contraire, Bumpy, dear, my aim is pretty darn good and my bite can be worse than his... especially if I get to be as hungry as Eyes. He's just a smart man, that's all.

Coffee's on, Eyes. I dunno what Dooj has cooking, but it smells sweet ... not funny like that clown. Maybe she's fixing up something with a little mermaid?

[doojable]

Coffee's on, Eyes. I dunno what Dooj has cooking, but it smells sweet ... not funny like that clown. Maybe she's fixing up something with a little mermaid?

I don't let mermaids in my kitchen - they have trouble standing at the stove...

I'll be happy to serve up some beignets and cafe for you though...

I also make an excellent omelet.

Edited August 26, 2007 by doojable

[Belle]

I also make an excellent omelet.

Mmmmmmmm PROTEIN!!! Protein is good! May help keep Eyes' hunger at bay longer, too.....

[Eyesopen]

Au contraire, Bumpy, dear, my aim is pretty darn good and my bite can be worse than his... especially if I get to be as hungry as Eyes. He's just a smart man, that's all.

Coffee's on, Eyes. I dunno what Dooj has cooking, but it smells sweet ... not funny like that clown. Maybe she's fixing up something with a little mermaid?

Sooo Dooj....what's for breakfast? Enquiring sharks want to know.

The coffee and danish are on the table...that's a good snack...keeps my teeth out of the waitresses but....

Sounds like sister Belle is getting hungry too. Perhaps you have some filet of "the ex" in the fridge?

[doojable]

Okay, okay, Pipe down you two...

Look, I'm cooking as fast as I can. Let's see:

Omelets, hashbrowns, biscuits and gravy, Bump on a Log ;),

I can't cook that ex though - seems he's been in the trash too long...

[Eyesopen]

Mmmmmmmm PROTEIN!!! Protein is good! May help keep Eyes' hunger at bay longer, too.....

Hmmm...eggs? Ok...you got a few dozen? I like that huevos rancheros stuff! Can you do that?

[doojable]

Got the chile right here....so how many dozen eggs...?

[Eyesopen]

Got the chile right here....so how many dozen eggs...?

'bout five, I have to save room for the hashbrowns, bisquits and gravy and the bacon.

How about you Belle, how many eggs you want in your huevos rancheros?

[Belle]

Mmmmmm five sounds good.... I plan to eat my biscuits with lots of gravy and bacon .....extra crispy bacon, please!

[doojable]

Mmmmmm five sounds good.... I plan to eat my biscuits with lots of gravy and bacon .....extra crispy bacon, please!

I'll whip them right up.

gotta get going!

[Bumpy]

Ladies...The French nightly news has this unbelievably beautiful French female shark presenter...I’m driving my 1/2 French female shark wife crazy with how her “looooks” are affecting my vision!!

Just to let you know...IF you were here in this little “bumpy chateau” having breakfast avec moi, I would start with the most beautiful French croissant, followed by your favorite “shark” omelette & Champagne!!

Trust Me, the laughs would be on the house!

Bump

[doojable]

Aren't the sharks about to converge somewhere near San Francisco?

:evildenk: