One word...KARATE...It isn`t the answer to every situation, but it sure can be the solution to a lot of problems. All of my kids are required to study it. The odds of one of the 8 of us being attacked in this life time are pretty significant....we endeavor to increase the odds of our survival in any way we can.
I have a gun at my bedside, another in my purse and another in my glove compartment.
I will not go down without a fight and if if it is my day to die, I will die fighting.
AMEN, DOT!!!!!!!!!
Also, having NRA stickers on your vehicles may help.
When we lived in Memphis, we had NRA stickers on all vehicles and on the front and back doors of our business. I made sure that our car wash employees knew
that hubby and I carried guns and were trained and we were not afraid to use them.
We were never robbed at our busy car wash, Thank GOD!!!!!!!!
Just this morning, we were both at our auto repair shop doing some work, and one of our customers came in. He had just returned from ATLANTA where he had
gotten off an exit for gas and was almost mugged!!!!!! I thought of you, dear DOT!!!!!!!!!!! Bless your heart and all those who have endured such tragedy in your
lives.
Thank all of you for putting your lives out here in cyberspace to help other women. God bless each of you.
Hey Dot as a quick aside....the revolver that I was talking about is American arms or Heritage...it comes in 22 or 22 mag...it`s handle folds onto it like a pocket knife where it conceals in a nice little pouch a little larger than pocket knife. :)
I have an extensive knife "collection" and have taken the classes on how to use 'em.
I have a 9mm, a shotgun and a .22 long rifle, for "hunting" of course.
I not only know "self defense" techniques but I know them well enough to train both the Police and the Air Force in my state. That includes "baton" defense/offense.
I go to the gym 3-5 times a week and bench press more than should be expected and I can run without stopping or slowing for an hour and a half. (Could probably do more if needed)
I live in a state where killing someone who invades your home is considered "self defense" and is not prosecuted. In fact clear cut cases of "self defense" do not even get considered regardless of if they are in the home or not.
I'm with Dot, if its my day to die, then I will die fighting.
I think God works in you to help strengthen others....
Yes! I agree, with Rascal. Dot, you are one of the strongest, most faith-filled women I know. I see you fighting for those who need someone to stand up for them.
Please don`t refer to yourself ...someone that I admire so much....as damaged goods.
We all have places where we've been hurt, but I believe that those same places are where people like you can stand up and help others be healed.
Ladies! Wait until you visit the crime capitol of the Universe, South Africa! Six times the US per capita!! Johannesburg is a no go-zone, as are all major SA cities after about 6pm. Everyone has been or knows someone who has been...”attacked”, raped, shot, murdered, mugged, you name it. This link should give you a little idea. Plus all the other links associated with crime in SA. It’s a bit more than lions, tigers and bears....oh my!!
Everyone lives in fear behind security systems and personal weapons. How soon will America be experiencing the same degree of crime??
One of the greatest deterrent to someone who's broken into your house while you're there is the sound of a shotgun cocking. Bar none, the sound gives a loud warning before any fight is enganged. If they're not in the same room as you, it's a good way to chase them out of the house.
In my opinion, Pond is way out of line with his comments, he is probably not a woman, and has some sort of axe to grind for whatever reason, he comments are suspiciously defensive.
Also, almost every female roomate or good friend I've ever had has been raped, and I could venture a guess that most all women in the USA have had an unwanted sexual advance or assault in their past, and perhaps assaults on young female children have been increasing as well. And actually, pedifilia has gotten so bad in this country, more young boys are vicitimized than ever before, not only the rape of boys but male rape victims in general has increased exponentially.
My first gun was an uzi hand gun from Isreal. I could not handle it, I said to others, when I shot I looked like Elaine dancing on Seinfeld.
I have since bought two 38 revolvers, a baretta tomcat, and baretta 9mm I have a taurus 9mm
I had a LADY smith and wesson but it was too difficult to take it apart and clean, baretta's are easier. The guns are wide for my hand and the kick rips into the web by my thumb, I do not know what to do about it.
My first gun was an uzi hand gun from Isreal. I could not handle it, I said to others, when I shot I looked like Elaine dancing on Seinfeld.
I have since bought two 38 revolvers, a baretta tomcat, and baretta 9mm I have a taurus 9mm
I had a LADY smith and wesson but it was too difficult to take it apart and clean, baretta's are easier. The guns are wide for my hand and the kick rips into the web by my thumb, I do not know what to do about it.
But I do not want to derail this important topic
Get a Sig Sauer the grips are smaller. Or you could just come live with me. I really don't take a whole lot of cr@p anymore. But like Rascal and probably everyother sane mother, I fight like crazy to protect those little rug crawlin' pains in my tail.
Now I'm raising my grand neice as well. Her mother, my actual neice passed away and her three children were split up. The two girls got sent to live with their dad and the youngest her boy went to my sis, his grandmother. Eventually dad realized that two teenage girls were a bit much for him and he asked me to get Crissy from the juvenile detention center where he had sent her on Easter. She has lived with me ever since. She still has nightmares and is still angry with God for taking her mom. It is difficult at her age to understand much through the pain and loss. But it is getting better.
Dot, if your gun recoil is hurting your hand, how are you placing your hands around the gun? I prefer holding the grip by my right hand and cupping the underside of the gun and right hand with my left. Also, if you are not pushing the gun away from you with your right hand while firing and if you grip is not strong and ridgid, you'll experience a stronger recoil and some guns will even jam because of this. Very firm gripping of the gun while activiely pushing it away from you with your trigger hand while shooting usually minimizes recoil impact.
There are a lot of training schools out there that will help you improve your shooting abilities, good shooting ability requires some outside instruction, in my area there are specific women only classes that will add to your knowledge, they are from 4-12 hours usually.
And...the avatar is the girl, Trinity, from The Matrix shooting a Beretta with a kitten coming out instead of a bullet.
Maybe I should get a sharper resolution of it so you can tell it's a kitten and not an angel.
By the way, my Beretta is my favorite gun in my collection.
Be VERY, VERY careful about where you keep those weapons.
It might not be such a good idea to keep them in plain view.
The point is this:
Any weapon you present, can and may likely be used against you if you are not skilled enough to render it effective and maintain possession of it.
Nothing is in plain sight here. Only I know where they are and how to quickly get to them should it ever be needed. One of my ex's was also a nidon in Karate and taught me well. I ranked around a 3rd brown belt before we divorced. I did not want to go to a black belt due to at that time, the state we lived in required you to register your hands once you got your black belt.
My soon to be ex hubby, who I'm still buddies with and hang out with daily for the most part, is a retired cop. As I said, I have a lot of the 'toys' of the job around and he taught me how to use them.
I've always been a knife fan. I still mourne the loss of my balanced throwing knife I lost in a move. Never have found another one to equal it, but when I do, it will be mine. LOL. If I should ever pull one, I would have every intention of using it and know how to use them.
I may look like nothing at my 5 feet even and with the Crohn's my weight can vary from my lowest 9 years ago of 72 pounds to the 104 I am at today, (due to separating from, then starting the divorcing my husband, so I was able to get the SSI and medicare I had qualified for ... if I had no income. Gotta love our Government huh?) but now I'm under the care of a very good pain doctor and G. I. doc. Where I live is mostly disabled and elderly people, so there is no fear to be had in this building and the manager ensures it stays that way. It was where I used to live that I was terrified to go outside the front door with all the drug dealers and gang bangers that had invaded that few block area, as the wave of illegal aliens has now reached that part of town. Now away from there all is good, but I still keep my toys handy, mainly now just out of habit and the feeling of security. Hang around with cops and the like the majority of your life and you kinda pick up the habits of keeping your home, thus yourself, secure.
Ladies! You are BLOWING my mind!! Are you all certified members of the NRA on national and local registers? You girls might be better suited to take your vengeance out against “men” in Iraq. Did TWI do this to you?? :(
Sounds like y’all have enough fire power and toughness to sign on the marine line!
Lord knows “W” and all of America could use a few more boots on the ground...Yikes!
You have a problem with ladies being able to take care of themselves Bumpy? You think that this is something twi *did* to us...like being able to protect ones self is a bad thing??
I think that it just makes perfect sense to have as many *tools* available to defend ones self as is possible in todays world.
Do you think for one second that I want my daughters vulnerable? Do you think I ever want my sons to have to cower helplessly while themselves or someone they love is assaulted??
I personally think that self defense should be a required subject all through grade school.
My sensei sat all of the students down one time....He is a staunch Christian....He said that he taught karate in hopes that he could not only help intill the morals in a child so that hopefully when needed that they would have the character to stand up for what was right ...not only for themselves but others....and the ability to do so as well.
This struck me as an honorable goal...how many times had evil succeded because nobody had the ability to stand against it???
My 4 oldest children and I are varying degrees of brown belt, many of us will test for black in nov. My younger kids are under colors...my 7 yr old is up to orange already.
The confidence we have gained has allowed us to render aid in situations where every one else was standing by helplessly.
My 4 oldest children and I are varying degrees of brown belt, many of us will test for black in nov. My younger kids are under colors...my 7 yr old is up to orange already.
The confidence we have gained has allowed us to render aid in situations where every one else was standing by helplessly.
It is a good thing :)
Very impressive Rascal. Now I know that I'm not going to be pushing any of your buttons anytime soon. :)
Ladies! You are BLOWING my mind!! Are you all certified members of the NRA on national and local registers? You girls might be better suited to take your vengeance out against “men” in Iraq. Did TWI do this to you?? :(
Sounds like y’all have enough fire power and toughness to sign on the marine line!
Lord knows “W” and all of America could use a few more boots on the ground...Yikes!
LOL, since I'm still awake being the night person I am and waiting for ex to get here after he gets off work to go to the store to pick up some meds I need I thought I'd let you know I'm harmless Bumpy, unless you try to hurt me.
I didn't include any TWI related rapes in my original post, that one I left out as I think I touched on it before in here. Maybe not, that one is the one that took me the longest to get over.
I had broken up with the guy from TWI I'd been going out with, then lived with for quite some time and found my own little place. It was a sweet little one bedroom 'mother in law' house behind the main house in the next town over closer to where I had found a job. One night, the wrong night, I forgot to lock my door I guess because I woke up in the middle of the night to find someone standing next to my bed. He then spoke and I realized who it was and he had been drinking, something he didn't do often so didn't handle it well. He drank with friends from work, which then made him horny. He thought he'd just come on in and see me.
I told him to leave and started to get up. That got me pushed down and held down as he took what he wanted in any body orifice he wanted. Finally after about an hour he left. I curled up, cried myself to sleep knowing I had to be up in a few hours for work. I did talk to my twig leader the next day and was told to try to forget it happened and go on with life. Same thing they told every girl. I was told that too, like with the other ones before in the 70's and early 80's I talked about in the other post .. this was in the mid 80's, shortly after VP died.
Then about a week later I got some bad food from one of the fast food places I'd hit for lunch I guess. I woke up and hours later when I was able to leave the bathroom the only thing I was passing was water and blood. I couldn't even stand up. I crawled to my bedroom window, thankfully it was low and sat beside it until my neighbor got home from work and called out to him to come help me. I had no phone, but he did. He got me to the hospital and they did all kinds of tests on me.
They couldn't figure out exactly when I got the bad food, so we couldn't say which restaurant it had come from. I was reported to the health dept though it was a serious enough type of human transferred virus due to someone not washing their hands then preparing food and told to stay home for a week, which of course meant I lost my job.
As I was leaving the ER the nurse handed me some scripts for what the doctor wanted me to take. The last one she handed me, was one for prenatal vitamins. I asked her why he was giving that to me, she said 'oh, you don't know yet I guess, blood tests pick up before you would normally start your period. You are pregnant, congratulations.' I thanked her for all the help I got there and went home and I cried again.
Another couple weeks went by and the bleeding started and didn't stop. I was slowly miscarrying and needed to get a D and C done the doctors said when I was again looked at, but with no insurance and no job, I couldn't afford one. They suggested using a woman's clinic since it's the same procedure an abortion is and it was something I had to do. That virus I caught shortly before is what they felt caused me to lose the baby. That was the only thing I could afford after borrowing some money from my mother. My twig leader took me there, holding her baby so the anti abortion group protesting outside wouldn't attack me as they did all the women going in that day. They thought we were going in for her, not for me. She left me there and then picked me up when they said to later on after it was done.
I wasn't put to sleep, they just give you laughing gas, twilight sleep my foot. I remember to this day every second of that and knowing as I was losing that innocent baby to begin with, I had to lay there and listen to it all that was left inside being sucked out of me and feel the pain emotionally and physically. While it wasn't a true abortion, I went thru all the same things a woman getting one, against her will, did. You will find many of us here on this site. My circumstances are just a bit different in this case is all. If I would have had insurance I would have been in a hospital sound asleep and never have had to go thru that. Had that boyfriend from TWI not been such a jerk and believed TWI's line about women I wouldn't have been there to go thru it. Had I stood up for myself I would have turned him in to the police, but I instead obeyed leadership. So now I will live with the memories the rest of my life.
I found a silver tie tac on one of those black plastic squares they use to show them to you on a rack in a local Christian book store when I first moved to Phoenix 9 years ago. I bought it. It is the size and exact shape of a 10 week old baby's feet in the womb. I keep it still on the black plastic square, pinned on the corkboard that is always next to my computer, wherever I may live. I look at it many times a day and ask God for His peace in my heart for yet another day, till the day comes that my life ends. It really helps me get thru life and I'm so happy I found it. As I look at it now I tear up, those feet are so very tiny, but perfect. 10 weeks is normally the time a woman has an abortion it says on it. I wasn't quite that far yet, but close enough. I know it was made to shock people, but I use it for comfort. I know one day I will be reunited with that baby I lost again in heaven and am reminded of that when I look at it every day. I'm a reunited adoptee, so I don't use the word reunited lightly.
When I made the statement in my original post I'd been raped in the 70's, 80's and 90's, I only talked about the near rape. I didn't include the total rape from the 80's because it's still hard to talk about most of the time, I have to be in the right frame of mind to be able to. I was there now, so it was time to post it and add it to the first part of my story already here. The other time I mentioned it I didn't go into much detail I know.
...and I see it's after 6 am which means he will be here any minute, so I have to go run and get ready to go out. Then it will be time to come home and sleep for 'my night' which is actually morning and part of the early afternoon. Typical 3rd shifter. :) Have a great day everyone, see y'all later tonight when I'm online during my 'afternoon' and 'evening'.
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rascal
One word...KARATE...It isn`t the answer to every situation, but it sure can be the solution to a lot of problems. All of my kids are required to study it. The odds of one of the 8 of us being attacked in this life time are pretty significant....we endeavor to increase the odds of our survival in any way we can.
Good advice waysider.
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Dot Matrix
I have a gun at my bedside, another in my purse and another in my glove compartment.
I will not go down without a fight and if if it is my day to die, I will die fighting.
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act2
AMEN, DOT!!!!!!!!!
Also, having NRA stickers on your vehicles may help.
When we lived in Memphis, we had NRA stickers on all vehicles and on the front and back doors of our business. I made sure that our car wash employees knew
that hubby and I carried guns and were trained and we were not afraid to use them.
We were never robbed at our busy car wash, Thank GOD!!!!!!!!
Just this morning, we were both at our auto repair shop doing some work, and one of our customers came in. He had just returned from ATLANTA where he had
gotten off an exit for gas and was almost mugged!!!!!! I thought of you, dear DOT!!!!!!!!!!! Bless your heart and all those who have endured such tragedy in your
lives.
Thank all of you for putting your lives out here in cyberspace to help other women. God bless each of you.
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rascal
Well I have a gun too...lol
Hey Dot as a quick aside....the revolver that I was talking about is American arms or Heritage...it comes in 22 or 22 mag...it`s handle folds onto it like a pocket knife where it conceals in a nice little pouch a little larger than pocket knife. :)
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Eyesopen
I guess I over do it...
I have an extensive knife "collection" and have taken the classes on how to use 'em.
I have a 9mm, a shotgun and a .22 long rifle, for "hunting" of course.
I not only know "self defense" techniques but I know them well enough to train both the Police and the Air Force in my state. That includes "baton" defense/offense.
I go to the gym 3-5 times a week and bench press more than should be expected and I can run without stopping or slowing for an hour and a half. (Could probably do more if needed)
I live in a state where killing someone who invades your home is considered "self defense" and is not prosecuted. In fact clear cut cases of "self defense" do not even get considered regardless of if they are in the home or not.
I'm with Dot, if its my day to die, then I will die fighting.
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exwaycorps
WHAT A GREAT IDEA !!!!
REALLY sends the message "don't mess with me... I'M PACKIN!"
I'm getting some of those stickers!!!
My BRAND NEW car (baby) was broken into only a month after I got it.
One very expensive alarm system later...I still want those stickers !!!!
Do you have to join to get them ????
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rascal
Probably...lol but is that a BAD thing ;)
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wrdsandwrks
Yes! I agree, with Rascal. Dot, you are one of the strongest, most faith-filled women I know. I see you fighting for those who need someone to stand up for them.
We all have places where we've been hurt, but I believe that those same places are where people like you can stand up and help others be healed.
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act2
Someone on GS may have extras, exwaycorps, I don't know.
I may even have an extra one. I will have to check and see.
Getting ready to go to my sister's 60th birthday party so it will be tomorrow before I can check.
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Bumpy
Ladies! Wait until you visit the crime capitol of the Universe, South Africa! Six times the US per capita!! Johannesburg is a no go-zone, as are all major SA cities after about 6pm. Everyone has been or knows someone who has been...”attacked”, raped, shot, murdered, mugged, you name it. This link should give you a little idea. Plus all the other links associated with crime in SA. It’s a bit more than lions, tigers and bears....oh my!!
Everyone lives in fear behind security systems and personal weapons. How soon will America be experiencing the same degree of crime??
http://www.int.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=...92015790C824249
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George Aar
And a word of caution,
I don't think a .22 is anywhere near as potent as it needs to be to be an effective defense weapon.
I simply wouldn't think of carrying one for that purpose.
Were I to start carrying again, I wouldn't get anything less than a .40 S&W.
I'm not very confident in a .38 special, a 9 mm and certainly not any of the wimpy
"ladies" guns that are made.
Looky, if you need a gun for protection, you've got to get yourself one that's up to the task.
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now I see
One of the greatest deterrent to someone who's broken into your house while you're there is the sound of a shotgun cocking. Bar none, the sound gives a loud warning before any fight is enganged. If they're not in the same room as you, it's a good way to chase them out of the house.
In my opinion, Pond is way out of line with his comments, he is probably not a woman, and has some sort of axe to grind for whatever reason, he comments are suspiciously defensive.
Also, almost every female roomate or good friend I've ever had has been raped, and I could venture a guess that most all women in the USA have had an unwanted sexual advance or assault in their past, and perhaps assaults on young female children have been increasing as well. And actually, pedifilia has gotten so bad in this country, more young boys are vicitimized than ever before, not only the rape of boys but male rape victims in general has increased exponentially.
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Dot Matrix
Bumpy
That is a terrible way to live.
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Dot Matrix
EWO
I am getting rid of my guns and moving in with you!
Thanks Wand W
Act2
60!!!! Gosh, we are old enough to have 60 year old sisters -- how did that happen?
Rascal I will look up that gun
Aside
You all may want to read my post on becoming a Canadian - we may need to be fighting for a different cause real soon!
BNIS
Is your avitar a gun? A gal shooting a fairy?
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Dot Matrix
George
My first gun was an uzi hand gun from Isreal. I could not handle it, I said to others, when I shot I looked like Elaine dancing on Seinfeld.
I have since bought two 38 revolvers, a baretta tomcat, and baretta 9mm I have a taurus 9mm
I had a LADY smith and wesson but it was too difficult to take it apart and clean, baretta's are easier. The guns are wide for my hand and the kick rips into the web by my thumb, I do not know what to do about it.
But I do not want to derail this important topic
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Eyesopen
Get a Sig Sauer the grips are smaller. Or you could just come live with me. I really don't take a whole lot of cr@p anymore. But like Rascal and probably everyother sane mother, I fight like crazy to protect those little rug crawlin' pains in my tail.
Now I'm raising my grand neice as well. Her mother, my actual neice passed away and her three children were split up. The two girls got sent to live with their dad and the youngest her boy went to my sis, his grandmother. Eventually dad realized that two teenage girls were a bit much for him and he asked me to get Crissy from the juvenile detention center where he had sent her on Easter. She has lived with me ever since. She still has nightmares and is still angry with God for taking her mom. It is difficult at her age to understand much through the pain and loss. But it is getting better.
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Deciderator
Hey, doan nobody sleep on the .45 cal. derringer......................
For a "hunting" rifle, I likes my surplus M1 Garand
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now I see
Dot, if your gun recoil is hurting your hand, how are you placing your hands around the gun? I prefer holding the grip by my right hand and cupping the underside of the gun and right hand with my left. Also, if you are not pushing the gun away from you with your right hand while firing and if you grip is not strong and ridgid, you'll experience a stronger recoil and some guns will even jam because of this. Very firm gripping of the gun while activiely pushing it away from you with your trigger hand while shooting usually minimizes recoil impact.
There are a lot of training schools out there that will help you improve your shooting abilities, good shooting ability requires some outside instruction, in my area there are specific women only classes that will add to your knowledge, they are from 4-12 hours usually.
And...the avatar is the girl, Trinity, from The Matrix shooting a Beretta with a kitten coming out instead of a bullet.
Maybe I should get a sharper resolution of it so you can tell it's a kitten and not an angel.
By the way, my Beretta is my favorite gun in my collection.
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BikerBabe
Nothing is in plain sight here. Only I know where they are and how to quickly get to them should it ever be needed. One of my ex's was also a nidon in Karate and taught me well. I ranked around a 3rd brown belt before we divorced. I did not want to go to a black belt due to at that time, the state we lived in required you to register your hands once you got your black belt.
My soon to be ex hubby, who I'm still buddies with and hang out with daily for the most part, is a retired cop. As I said, I have a lot of the 'toys' of the job around and he taught me how to use them.
I've always been a knife fan. I still mourne the loss of my balanced throwing knife I lost in a move. Never have found another one to equal it, but when I do, it will be mine. LOL. If I should ever pull one, I would have every intention of using it and know how to use them.
I may look like nothing at my 5 feet even and with the Crohn's my weight can vary from my lowest 9 years ago of 72 pounds to the 104 I am at today, (due to separating from, then starting the divorcing my husband, so I was able to get the SSI and medicare I had qualified for ... if I had no income. Gotta love our Government huh?) but now I'm under the care of a very good pain doctor and G. I. doc. Where I live is mostly disabled and elderly people, so there is no fear to be had in this building and the manager ensures it stays that way. It was where I used to live that I was terrified to go outside the front door with all the drug dealers and gang bangers that had invaded that few block area, as the wave of illegal aliens has now reached that part of town. Now away from there all is good, but I still keep my toys handy, mainly now just out of habit and the feeling of security. Hang around with cops and the like the majority of your life and you kinda pick up the habits of keeping your home, thus yourself, secure.
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Bumpy
Ladies! You are BLOWING my mind!! Are you all certified members of the NRA on national and local registers? You girls might be better suited to take your vengeance out against “men” in Iraq. Did TWI do this to you?? :(
Sounds like y’all have enough fire power and toughness to sign on the marine line!
Lord knows “W” and all of America could use a few more boots on the ground...Yikes!
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rascal
You have a problem with ladies being able to take care of themselves Bumpy? You think that this is something twi *did* to us...like being able to protect ones self is a bad thing??
I think that it just makes perfect sense to have as many *tools* available to defend ones self as is possible in todays world.
Do you think for one second that I want my daughters vulnerable? Do you think I ever want my sons to have to cower helplessly while themselves or someone they love is assaulted??
I personally think that self defense should be a required subject all through grade school.
My sensei sat all of the students down one time....He is a staunch Christian....He said that he taught karate in hopes that he could not only help intill the morals in a child so that hopefully when needed that they would have the character to stand up for what was right ...not only for themselves but others....and the ability to do so as well.
This struck me as an honorable goal...how many times had evil succeded because nobody had the ability to stand against it???
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rascal
My 4 oldest children and I are varying degrees of brown belt, many of us will test for black in nov. My younger kids are under colors...my 7 yr old is up to orange already.
The confidence we have gained has allowed us to render aid in situations where every one else was standing by helplessly.
It is a good thing :)
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Eyesopen
Very impressive Rascal. Now I know that I'm not going to be pushing any of your buttons anytime soon. :)
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BikerBabe
LOL, since I'm still awake being the night person I am and waiting for ex to get here after he gets off work to go to the store to pick up some meds I need I thought I'd let you know I'm harmless Bumpy, unless you try to hurt me.
I didn't include any TWI related rapes in my original post, that one I left out as I think I touched on it before in here. Maybe not, that one is the one that took me the longest to get over.
I had broken up with the guy from TWI I'd been going out with, then lived with for quite some time and found my own little place. It was a sweet little one bedroom 'mother in law' house behind the main house in the next town over closer to where I had found a job. One night, the wrong night, I forgot to lock my door I guess because I woke up in the middle of the night to find someone standing next to my bed. He then spoke and I realized who it was and he had been drinking, something he didn't do often so didn't handle it well. He drank with friends from work, which then made him horny. He thought he'd just come on in and see me.
I told him to leave and started to get up. That got me pushed down and held down as he took what he wanted in any body orifice he wanted. Finally after about an hour he left. I curled up, cried myself to sleep knowing I had to be up in a few hours for work. I did talk to my twig leader the next day and was told to try to forget it happened and go on with life. Same thing they told every girl. I was told that too, like with the other ones before in the 70's and early 80's I talked about in the other post .. this was in the mid 80's, shortly after VP died.
Then about a week later I got some bad food from one of the fast food places I'd hit for lunch I guess. I woke up and hours later when I was able to leave the bathroom the only thing I was passing was water and blood. I couldn't even stand up. I crawled to my bedroom window, thankfully it was low and sat beside it until my neighbor got home from work and called out to him to come help me. I had no phone, but he did. He got me to the hospital and they did all kinds of tests on me.
They couldn't figure out exactly when I got the bad food, so we couldn't say which restaurant it had come from. I was reported to the health dept though it was a serious enough type of human transferred virus due to someone not washing their hands then preparing food and told to stay home for a week, which of course meant I lost my job.
As I was leaving the ER the nurse handed me some scripts for what the doctor wanted me to take. The last one she handed me, was one for prenatal vitamins. I asked her why he was giving that to me, she said 'oh, you don't know yet I guess, blood tests pick up before you would normally start your period. You are pregnant, congratulations.' I thanked her for all the help I got there and went home and I cried again.
Another couple weeks went by and the bleeding started and didn't stop. I was slowly miscarrying and needed to get a D and C done the doctors said when I was again looked at, but with no insurance and no job, I couldn't afford one. They suggested using a woman's clinic since it's the same procedure an abortion is and it was something I had to do. That virus I caught shortly before is what they felt caused me to lose the baby. That was the only thing I could afford after borrowing some money from my mother. My twig leader took me there, holding her baby so the anti abortion group protesting outside wouldn't attack me as they did all the women going in that day. They thought we were going in for her, not for me. She left me there and then picked me up when they said to later on after it was done.
I wasn't put to sleep, they just give you laughing gas, twilight sleep my foot. I remember to this day every second of that and knowing as I was losing that innocent baby to begin with, I had to lay there and listen to it all that was left inside being sucked out of me and feel the pain emotionally and physically. While it wasn't a true abortion, I went thru all the same things a woman getting one, against her will, did. You will find many of us here on this site. My circumstances are just a bit different in this case is all. If I would have had insurance I would have been in a hospital sound asleep and never have had to go thru that. Had that boyfriend from TWI not been such a jerk and believed TWI's line about women I wouldn't have been there to go thru it. Had I stood up for myself I would have turned him in to the police, but I instead obeyed leadership. So now I will live with the memories the rest of my life.
I found a silver tie tac on one of those black plastic squares they use to show them to you on a rack in a local Christian book store when I first moved to Phoenix 9 years ago. I bought it. It is the size and exact shape of a 10 week old baby's feet in the womb. I keep it still on the black plastic square, pinned on the corkboard that is always next to my computer, wherever I may live. I look at it many times a day and ask God for His peace in my heart for yet another day, till the day comes that my life ends. It really helps me get thru life and I'm so happy I found it. As I look at it now I tear up, those feet are so very tiny, but perfect. 10 weeks is normally the time a woman has an abortion it says on it. I wasn't quite that far yet, but close enough. I know it was made to shock people, but I use it for comfort. I know one day I will be reunited with that baby I lost again in heaven and am reminded of that when I look at it every day. I'm a reunited adoptee, so I don't use the word reunited lightly.
When I made the statement in my original post I'd been raped in the 70's, 80's and 90's, I only talked about the near rape. I didn't include the total rape from the 80's because it's still hard to talk about most of the time, I have to be in the right frame of mind to be able to. I was there now, so it was time to post it and add it to the first part of my story already here. The other time I mentioned it I didn't go into much detail I know.
...and I see it's after 6 am which means he will be here any minute, so I have to go run and get ready to go out. Then it will be time to come home and sleep for 'my night' which is actually morning and part of the early afternoon. Typical 3rd shifter. :) Have a great day everyone, see y'all later tonight when I'm online during my 'afternoon' and 'evening'.
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