Proofreader’s Oversight

[T-Bone]

Now if I were overseeing gooder grammar and PUNctuation - , things would be donE a lot differently? When I say "overseeing" I literally mean "seeing over." It's just not seeing outside the box – but specifically above the box./! Some people may have a way with words::: but I like to have my way with the words…I reMember that fateful day when I actually heard the voice of PUNctuation. That's right…audibly – just like I'm speaking to you write now {through an ectoplasmic representation of my (s)elf embedded in this very post #}.;. One December day / as I was reading a news brief in a local paper about snow being on the gas pumps of a convenience stor [sic] [well actually that's "sick" – most convenience stores make me sick] in Aspen – that little dude at the end of the sentence [i'm alluding to the period] said "end of the line, Buster."

And now \\\\ if you will accompany me down the slippery road of gooder grammar and PUNctuation – I will heretofore agitate the agitatable ones by showing a flagrant disregard for Wholly Wit by twisting certain alleged PUNctifications into something a little more stupefying. I don't think the question mark gets enough air time – and when used in the following passage from Luke 23 really adds a lot more suspense to the conversation:

42 And he said unto Jesus, Lord, remember me when thou comest into thy kingdom.

43 And Jesus said unto him, Verily I say unto thee, Today shalt thou be with me in paradise?

I also think we take out that one little comma in the Acts 21 passage – we find the whole situation becomes more dramatic – realizing the people trying to talk Paul out of going to Jerusalem died while talking to him. I think the context will bear this out – in verse 13 Paul said he was willing to die at Jerusalem – they actually wanted to one-up Paul and die right there on the spot. Man, what believing!

12 And when we heard these things, both we, and they of that place, besought him not to go up to Jerusalem.

13 Then Paul answered, What mean ye to weep and to break mine heart? for I am ready not to be bound only, but also to die at Jerusalem for the name of the Lord Jesus.

14 And when he would not be persuaded, we ceased, saying [comma deleted] The will of the Lord be done.

I imagine we have a few other proofreader wannabes out there....//||\\....you may proceed....

Edited May 17, 2007 by T-Bone

[mstar1]

Eye dont consern myself with mutch of things lik these mutch any moor

I due remeber a day when a way core twig coronator was cot steeling at the conveient storr

he later ope'd my eyes to gawds truth for our lives like it hasnT ben known sinc the furst sentury by puntuating ephesians thus:

.....

Let him that stole, steal.

No more let him labour with his hands....

......

[Ham]

I don't know about bibles.. but I've heard dictionaries sometimes have a few out of the ordinary entries so they can determine if somebody is just raw copying..

[wrdsandwrks]

This topic reminded me about the so-called "Sinner's Bible". A printer inadvertantly left a "not" out of the seventh commandment so that it read:

Thou shalt commit adultery.

I think this was the version of the Bible that VP used. Or maybe it was a "literal according to usage."

Some other interesting errors listed under

Bible errata

in Wikipedia:

"Unrighteous Bible" or "Wicked Bible" 1653: Cambridge Press: The edition carrying this title omits a "not" before the word "inherit", making I Corinthians 6:9 read "Know ye not that the unrighteous shall inherit the kingdom of God?..." In addition, Romans 6:13 reads "Neither yield ye your members as instruments of righteousness into sin..." where it should read "unrighteousness".

"Sin On Bible": 1716: John 5:14 reads "Go and sin on more" rather than "Go and sin no more".

"Printers Bible" bef. 1702: Psalm 119:161 reads "Printers have persecuted me without cause." The first word was changed, possibly by a typesetter, from "Princes".

"The Fools Bible": 1763: Psalm 14:1 reads "the fool hath said in his heart there is a God", rather than "...there is no God".

"Standing Fishes Bible" 1806: "Fishes" replaced "fishers" making Ezekiel 47:10 read "And it shall come to pass, that the fishes shall stand upon it from Engedi even unto Eneglaim;

"The Large Family Bible" 1820: Isaiah 66:9 reads: "Shall I bring to birth and not cease to bring forth?" rather than "Shall I bring to birth and not cause to bring forth?".

[templelady]

Personaly, my spellig has all ways stunk and now with me not having spell check on this computer I am truelly lost.

as for punquation, I always go with the assumption that more, is bettor. You, can never have two, many commas>

[bliss]

.....

Let him that stole, steal.

No more let him labour with his hands....

......

MSTAR~~~~ now that was a WHOT!

[dmiller]

The Ultimate Proofreader's Oversight ---

(complements of Sami -- in the Just Plain Silly Thread) ---

A new young monk arrives at the monastery and as with all new monks,

he is assigned to help the other monks in copying the old canons

and laws of the church by hand.

He notices, however, that all of the monks are copying from copies,

not from the original manuscript.

So, the new monk goes to the head abbot to question this,

pointing out that if someone made even a small error in the first copy,

it would never be picked up.

In fact, that error would be continued in all of the subsequent copies.

The head monk, says, "We have been copying from the copies for centuries,

but you make a good point, my son."

So, he goes down into the dark caves underneath the monastery,

where the original manuscript is held as archives in a locked vault,

that hasn't been opened for hundreds of years.

Hours go by and nobody sees the old abbot.

So, the young monk gets worried and goes downstairs to look for him.

He sees him banging his head against the wall, and wailing, "We forgot the "R", we forgot the "R" !!!!!

His forehead is all bloody and bruised and he is crying uncontrollably.

The young monk asks the old abbot, "What's wrong, father?"

With a choking voice, the old abbot replies, "The word is celebrate."

The word is celebrate."!!!!!!!!!!!!!

;) ;) ;)

[dmiller]

Eye dont consern myself with mutch of things lik these mutch any moor

I due remeber a day when a way core twig coronator was cot steeling at the conveient storr

he later ope'd my eyes to gawds truth for our lives like it hasnT ben known sinc the furst sentury by puntuating ephesians thus:

.....

Let him that stole, steal.

No more let him labour with his hands....

......

Mstar -- I durn near busted a gut reading this!!!!

[T-Bone]

Mstar1 – your post # 2 stole the show!!!!

Hammeroni – interesting tidbit on dictionaries…What’s funny are the things you find around town. Near where I work a law office has the abbreviation for “PARKING” painted on the concrete parking space markers in front of their office – and they all read “PKRNG”.

Words and Works – thanks for the Bible errata – great examples of rightly-denying the Word.

Temple Lady – I feel the same way about question marks. In fact,,, I recommEnd anytime you are in doUbt about using a question marc at the end of a sEntEncE – _ - _ you cover yourself by adding two??

Bliss – word on the street is you plagiarized your signature from an Egyptian Things-to-do List.

DMiller – thanks for bringing Sami’s Ultimate Proofreader’s Oversight here – good stuff.

Here’s thr33 points of using gooder grammar;;;,,,

1. Tell them you’re going to use gooder grammar

B. Use gooder grammar

C. Tell them you used gooder grammar