...On day 6 of fasting, I could stand no more and went to a Mexican restaurant with some friends...I ate a combination plate and had two beers...it was fabulous!...until I got home!
I just about made it to the comode (running and pulling my pants down at the same time)...I EXPLODED!...afterwards, I laid on the couch, white as a sheet and shook for several hours...it was horrible. :(
but anyway...You know you are in twi if you were more concerned with the punctuation of a verse than with what the verse actually meant.
...On day 6 of fasting, I could stand no more and went to a Mexican restaurant with some friends...I ate a combination plate and had two beers...it was fabulous!...until I got home!
I just about made it to the comode (running and pulling my pants down at the same time)...I EXPLODED!...afterwards, I laid on the couch, white as a sheet and shook for several hours...it was horrible. :(
I once stopped the cleanse on day much like Groucho did but on the 5th day, instead of Mexican I ate a stromboli and a drank a beer, I was convinced that I was possesed by many demons because of what happened afterwards.
You know you were in the TWI if you've ever been on the cleanse and made the topic of a conversation the intricate details of your bowel movement.
You know you are in TWI when you are talked to like you are dirt by people who think they are more spiritual than you.
You know you are in TWI when these "more spiritual" people spread a lie that you took advantage of a girl in Charlotte, NC---even though you were in Oklahoma when said incident in Charlotte took place.
You know you were a TWI/Way Corps/Headquarters kid when...
-seeing a wooden spoon in the kitchen brings back fond memories of the "rod of correction" as well as spatulas, other spoons, or anything in reach of anyone who thought that they had the permission to spank you (A certain Linder hit me with a belt as a child for cutting his daughters hair...my mom laid into him for that one)
-You went to play at a friends house in New Knoxville but got turned away when the parents realized you were a Ministry kid (I was five)
-Going to Children's fellowship made you want to poke your own eye out, until you turned twelve and had to go to the adult SNS...which made CF seem like a field trip (I think I spent most Children's Fellowships out in the hall. It was more fun that way)
-You got in trouble incessantly for giggling during Twig, and you know that a Twig, Limb, and Branch isnt just a part of a tree.
-You were told as a small child that being friends with unbelievers would lead you down a road of destruction, and that the person you would marry would have to be in the Ministry or else you would be marked and avoided by all of your family members
-You called Rev Martindale "Craig" as a child...Yep. I definitely did. He didnt care...but man, some other people did.
-You eat something with kelp in it and are instantly reminded of meals at the Way. Also, you know what rice pudding SHOULD taste like. (It's the only good thing to ever come out of the Ministry in my book. Well, other than me!)
-Your parents got married with fifty other couples.
-You could play outside all day at Headquarters, and get by eating the apples, strawberries, and blackberries that were actually forbidden fruits to us.
-You got in trouble for picking Mrs. Wierwille's flowers and then giving them to Craig Martindale while he was driving his golf cart around.
-You know what Co-op is. And hated naptime with a passion.
-You ever had to break off contact with a best friend due to their being marked and avoided, and then find out years later that the best friend passed in a car accident. Makes you really think twice about the value of friendship, doesnt it?
-You knew the names of all the horses from the farm...Queenie, Jake, Strawberry, etc. And you got in trouble for chasing the chickens.
-You woke up every morning with the goal of not being spanked.
-You were taught to SIT at the age of five, but hated interpreting with a passion once you were qualified to do so.
-You went to three elementary schools, two middle schools, and two high schools as a direct or indirect result of the ministry. You also lived in many different houses because your parents were forced to rent.
-You got in trouble in first grade for constantly correcting the teacher on the actual birthday of Jesus Christ. (Sept 11...duh!)
-You shared a double wide with another family for living accomodations commonly referred to as "Units". Unit 23 bitches!
-You refrained from using the word "create" in a sentence unless the sentence was referring to God.
-You werent allowed to have a pet while your parents were in the Way Corps, and then, once they got out of the Way Corps, you got a pet that some Way Corps had to get rid of because they were Way Corps!
-You spent your summers swimming in the Pond by the Wierwille's house, and know that the Horseshoe pond was dynamite for catching the biggest Bullfrogs known to man.
-You ran in packs of 10 or more kids with BB guns because of sparrow overpopulation.
-When upon seeing the Big Hill that you used to sled on as a small child, you almost burst into tears because you realize that it was not a Big Hill at all, but basically a dirt mound.
-After receiving a college education, you have learned that the power of education is far greater than any power exerted by the Ministry...
How about, if you know what "self-structured vertical" time means?
Oh yeah, it means you let someone tell you that you can't take a nap even during "free" time.
Oooh, man!! I had forgotten all about that one!! It was such a big deal to occassionally be given self-structured time on campus! (my gosh, what does THAT say????) But then, they decided that if they were going to give us the time, we had to be productive with that time, and were not allowed to take a nap. --- like somehow sleep wasn't productive
Was it John Lynn that coined that phrase: vertical self-structured time?
The Men's coordinator in Fellowlaborers( Ron A.) actually told us once during a FL meeting(50 people present), that the physical need to sleep could be overriden by speaking in tongues.
We all fought like troopers not to break out in laughter because we were thoroughly exhausted at that point.
The very next morning, 50 people sat cross-legged on a cold basement floor at 5:30 AM waiting in total silence for said wiseman to make an appearance. He never did show. He was too busy sawing logs.
Afterwards, we all got our butts chewed for not starting without him.
(I think it was WG who posted on this incident a while back.)
You know you were in TWI if you can look back at that and laugh at yourself.
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doojable
And if you stop the cleanse early....
it's abbreviated....
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GrouchoMarxJr
Speaking of stopping the cleanse early...
...On day 6 of fasting, I could stand no more and went to a Mexican restaurant with some friends...I ate a combination plate and had two beers...it was fabulous!...until I got home!
I just about made it to the comode (running and pulling my pants down at the same time)...I EXPLODED!...afterwards, I laid on the couch, white as a sheet and shook for several hours...it was horrible. :(
but anyway...You know you are in twi if you were more concerned with the punctuation of a verse than with what the verse actually meant.
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JavaJane
You poor, poor, poor, thing!
And if you were living on staff...
Those poor, miserable, pitiful housekeepers!!!!
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doojable
You know you're in TWI -
...if every conversation eventually turns to sh)t.....
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Out There
I once stopped the cleanse on day much like Groucho did but on the 5th day, instead of Mexican I ate a stromboli and a drank a beer, I was convinced that I was possesed by many demons because of what happened afterwards.
You know you were in the TWI if you've ever been on the cleanse and made the topic of a conversation the intricate details of your bowel movement.
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Twinky
...you automatically add the word "crew" whenever you see the word "beverage"
...you find yourself ushering people to the front of any large meeting (especially in a church)
...you think ABS is something to do with money and not something to do with car brakes
...you jump into bed before midnight so that the debbul spirits can't get you
...you can't read the print in your Bible because of all your scribbled notes
...you can't hold a conversation without thinking the other person is somehow out to trick you
...you distrust your family and your oldest and dearest friends
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wrdsandwrks
How about, if you know what "self-structured vertical" time means?
Oh yeah, it means you let someone tell you that you can't take a nap even during "free" time.
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JavaJane
That's f***ed up!
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smarter
You know you are in TWI when you are talked to like you are dirt by people who think they are more spiritual than you.
You know you are in TWI when these "more spiritual" people spread a lie that you took advantage of a girl in Charlotte, NC---even though you were in Oklahoma when said incident in Charlotte took place.
But that's OK---God told them.
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likeaneagle
Smarter
hey there....I dont get it either..altho, this is never happened to me, I sure have seen way to much..hugs
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JavaJane
Glad you're smarter than that, Smarter. Nice to see you here.
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smarter
I have a new favorite message board :)
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GrouchoMarxJr
Smarter...Welcome to the cafe...pull up a stool and have a coffee on me.
...and if you want something a little stronger, I have a flask in my coat pocket.
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smarter
You have a deal good buddy!!!!!!!!
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doojable
You know you're in TWI if
.....the two-drink limit doesn't apply in the motorcoach.
.....the bus driver has a gun.
....."Bless Patrol" means anything but.
.....You put God on a shelf until you need Him.
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nicoleq23
You know you were a TWI/Way Corps/Headquarters kid when...
-seeing a wooden spoon in the kitchen brings back fond memories of the "rod of correction" as well as spatulas, other spoons, or anything in reach of anyone who thought that they had the permission to spank you (A certain Linder hit me with a belt as a child for cutting his daughters hair...my mom laid into him for that one)
-You went to play at a friends house in New Knoxville but got turned away when the parents realized you were a Ministry kid (I was five)
-Going to Children's fellowship made you want to poke your own eye out, until you turned twelve and had to go to the adult SNS...which made CF seem like a field trip (I think I spent most Children's Fellowships out in the hall. It was more fun that way)
-You got in trouble incessantly for giggling during Twig, and you know that a Twig, Limb, and Branch isnt just a part of a tree.
-You were told as a small child that being friends with unbelievers would lead you down a road of destruction, and that the person you would marry would have to be in the Ministry or else you would be marked and avoided by all of your family members
-You called Rev Martindale "Craig" as a child...Yep. I definitely did. He didnt care...but man, some other people did.
-You eat something with kelp in it and are instantly reminded of meals at the Way. Also, you know what rice pudding SHOULD taste like. (It's the only good thing to ever come out of the Ministry in my book. Well, other than me!)
-Your parents got married with fifty other couples.
-You could play outside all day at Headquarters, and get by eating the apples, strawberries, and blackberries that were actually forbidden fruits to us.
-You got in trouble for picking Mrs. Wierwille's flowers and then giving them to Craig Martindale while he was driving his golf cart around.
-You know what Co-op is. And hated naptime with a passion.
-You ever had to break off contact with a best friend due to their being marked and avoided, and then find out years later that the best friend passed in a car accident. Makes you really think twice about the value of friendship, doesnt it?
-You knew the names of all the horses from the farm...Queenie, Jake, Strawberry, etc. And you got in trouble for chasing the chickens.
-You woke up every morning with the goal of not being spanked.
-You were taught to SIT at the age of five, but hated interpreting with a passion once you were qualified to do so.
-You went to three elementary schools, two middle schools, and two high schools as a direct or indirect result of the ministry. You also lived in many different houses because your parents were forced to rent.
-You got in trouble in first grade for constantly correcting the teacher on the actual birthday of Jesus Christ. (Sept 11...duh!)
-You shared a double wide with another family for living accomodations commonly referred to as "Units". Unit 23 bitches!
-You refrained from using the word "create" in a sentence unless the sentence was referring to God.
-You werent allowed to have a pet while your parents were in the Way Corps, and then, once they got out of the Way Corps, you got a pet that some Way Corps had to get rid of because they were Way Corps!
-You spent your summers swimming in the Pond by the Wierwille's house, and know that the Horseshoe pond was dynamite for catching the biggest Bullfrogs known to man.
-You ran in packs of 10 or more kids with BB guns because of sparrow overpopulation.
-When upon seeing the Big Hill that you used to sled on as a small child, you almost burst into tears because you realize that it was not a Big Hill at all, but basically a dirt mound.
-After receiving a college education, you have learned that the power of education is far greater than any power exerted by the Ministry...
Alright. I'll stop. But I might be back.
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JavaJane
Hello, Nico!! Welcome to the Spot!! I'll buy you a cup of coffee if you want!
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doojable
Let's get her an extra slice of pie too.
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dmiller
Hey there. Welcome to GreaseSpot. :)
Here's a cool one for you Smarter.
Nico -- welcome to you as well!
(what's your preference in drinks??)
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smarter
Thank you kindly. Have one on me, also.
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TheHighWay
Oooh, man!! I had forgotten all about that one!! It was such a big deal to occassionally be given self-structured time on campus! (my gosh, what does THAT say????) But then, they decided that if they were going to give us the time, we had to be productive with that time, and were not allowed to take a nap. --- like somehow sleep wasn't productive
Was it John Lynn that coined that phrase: vertical self-structured time?
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doojable
JAL used to say that sleep was boring. Personally, I never found it boring, but then again, I have a GREAT dream life.....
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JavaJane
Actually, sleep causes cancer - which is spitit possession... so no sleep is good sleep, right?
(hence day old stretched coffee with a dry instant coffee chaser... mmmmm Mmmmmm)
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waysider
Honest to God! I don't make this stuff up!
The Men's coordinator in Fellowlaborers( Ron A.) actually told us once during a FL meeting(50 people present), that the physical need to sleep could be overriden by speaking in tongues.
We all fought like troopers not to break out in laughter because we were thoroughly exhausted at that point.
The very next morning, 50 people sat cross-legged on a cold basement floor at 5:30 AM waiting in total silence for said wiseman to make an appearance. He never did show. He was too busy sawing logs.
Afterwards, we all got our butts chewed for not starting without him.
(I think it was WG who posted on this incident a while back.)
You know you were in TWI if you can look back at that and laugh at yourself.
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