For years I had been going to fellowship as a poser in my own heart. 25 years total, about 21 of them a bleed green and white true believer. Well, I finally gathered the guts to tell my wife I didn't want to go any longer. The unintended consequence was that our marriage would die at the same moment. Our kids long since quit going to fellowship, so it was just us. Now it's just her.
Wow. *does the math* You were around when vpw was alive. (I don't capitalize his initials since learning everything
I've learned about him.)
You're not the only one who had to leave a spouse behind because they would rather
hide in the "bubble" of twi than face life outside of twi.
Not me, but a number of posters have had that happen.
I'm glad your kids aren't "in"-or at least are only "in" on paper and are awaiting an airlift,
whichever is the case.
I don't blame God. I blame myself, and the leadership in the Way for allowing people like the ones I had overseeing me to drive me out. I did my best. Now I guess I hang out in here with the rest of the "chaff" as Martindale used to so elequently put it. So what do people do in here anyway?
Well,
for starters, here's some advice for new posters....
I am so sorry that your marriage suffered. Know this....that contrary to twi`s threats.....God never left or forsook us after we left twi. I have been out for almost 15 years....My family is healthy, our lives prosperous in a way that I never dreamed of in twi.
When I left...it was like I took my foot off of the hose of God`s blessings...
It is tough, there is a lot of readjustments to make...but all in all life is very good.
Welcome, may you find what you need to continue your healing process here.
We fight amongst each other at times but we also protect and care for each other.
My suggestion is not to tell any personal information about yourself if you don't want it known to everyone because we do have eyes that watch us and not because they want to join our community but they want to use things against us. So be wise please, for your own protection.
MAN--------Maybe you could claim that is an acronym(You know, like M.A.N.="most acrobatic ninja"---or something)
Anyway, I'm kinda bummed that everybody already gave you all the GOOD advise.( Not really :) )
Welcome to the Cafe!
Oh, don't forget there is a PM feature. I don't use it very much because I like to say most things publically but it comes in very handy for loaning each other books, etc. and for maybe stating personal info. that really does not pertain to the general community.
As a son of someone who has been in TWI a long time (longer than you though), I can tell you that I would gladly welcome either of my parents leaving TWI for freedom. It is a really difficult thing that your wife hasn't left, but there is a chance, especially if you and your kids still prosper. She may not be there because she truly wants to be, but rather because she is afraid to leave because of the lies she has been told.
My best advice for you is to open up to your kids and get closer to them. They will help you adjust. Also remember that while much of what you learned in TWI is wrong, you should never look for another "ministry" like TWI to mislead you down another wrong path. You're a human being with a brain and can decide for yourself how to find the right way.
In any case, good luck (and the word luck won't bring devil spirits around either.)
My ex chose that group over me, but life has gotten exponentially better for me and he's still stuck with the same oppressive teachings and beliefs that bind and imprison folks. I seriously doubt there are any truly happy people left in TWI.
Way to go, Man! May I humbly suggest you take the time to read Toxic Faith - it was very helpful to me. Another good one is More Jesus, Less Religion. Happy reading!
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Bluzeman
Welcome Man!
Mostly we have food fights, so jump righ in.
Rick
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ChasUFarley
Welcome to freedom!
Breathe the fresh air!
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Ham
Yes, welcome. I hope your stay is a pleasant one. Have fun, and watch out for flying tomaters.
I'm sorry to hear about your marriage. Are you still in contact with the kids?
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waterbuffalo
You go, Man!!!!
Welcome to online therapy at Greasespot Cafe.
Aren't you happy you stood up for yourself?
I applaud your first step towards recovery, a new life, and probably a healthy new-found sense of self respect.
Live long and prosper, dude!
You are among friends here.
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Listener
I'm sorry to hear about your marriage. Some of us have been down that road, too. But, you're among good people here....so, enjoy the company.
So, hey, man, a hearty welcome to you, man. Man, it's cool you stopped in, man. :B)
OK, I'll stop. But, be warned.....this group might poke a little goodhearted at your screen name, man.
So, like, want a cup o' mud, man? I'm buyin'! And the pastries are to die for!!! :D
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sprawled out
good for you!
it may be a little scary at first, but you'll be all right.
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WordWolf
Wow. *does the math* You were around when vpw was alive. (I don't capitalize his initials since learning everything
I've learned about him.)
You're not the only one who had to leave a spouse behind because they would rather
hide in the "bubble" of twi than face life outside of twi.
Not me, but a number of posters have had that happen.
I'm glad your kids aren't "in"-or at least are only "in" on paper and are awaiting an airlift,
whichever is the case.
Well,
for starters, here's some advice for new posters....
http://www.greasespotcafe.com/ipb/index.php?showtopic=7913
If you're completely new to the internet and/or messageboards,
just say so, and the posters will provide some general guides.
(In the meantime, you can just watch this video...
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/posting.php )
Many of us are still Christians-just not in twi.
Some of us aren't anymore, but are still well-mannered participants in the discussions here.
Some of us joined denominations.
Some of us joined "splinter groups" -ex-twi groups managed by people twi taught.
Some of us run screaming when someone suggests joining a splinter group.
Some of us are "free agent" Christians, sort of "free tange".
It's considered healthy by almost all of us to examine the doctrines you were taught-
since you weren't allowed to do that until now, so you probably didn't.
The Doctrinal Forum has many discussions on those.
What else can you do?
Well, we have games in the Reading Room, and live chat in the Live Chat room.
We discuss all sorts of things in all sorts of forums.
I recommend spending some time in some of the Archives, in Doctrinal,
and looking thru old threads in "About the Way."
You'll learn a lot, and will have many, many surprises.
If you still have a copy of "the Way:Living in Love",
you might want to look at the thread "the Way:Living in Wonderland"
for another look at its contents.
(Or if you don't still have a copy, for that matter.)
I also recommend taking a few months and working thru the Documents
and Editorials on the main website. They're useful and worth reading-and rereading.
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FreeAtLast
Man, welcome hope you find this place a way of sorting through the bs. Maybe lol
The marriage thing isn't uncommon. Maybe she will awaken and come around. best to you.
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rascal
Welcome (((man))) (that is a cyber hug)
I am so sorry that your marriage suffered. Know this....that contrary to twi`s threats.....God never left or forsook us after we left twi. I have been out for almost 15 years....My family is healthy, our lives prosperous in a way that I never dreamed of in twi.
When I left...it was like I took my foot off of the hose of God`s blessings...
It is tough, there is a lot of readjustments to make...but all in all life is very good.
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ChattyKathy
Welcome, may you find what you need to continue your healing process here.
We fight amongst each other at times but we also protect and care for each other.
My suggestion is not to tell any personal information about yourself if you don't want it known to everyone because we do have eyes that watch us and not because they want to join our community but they want to use things against us. So be wise please, for your own protection.
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washingtonweather
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polar bear
Man-I was in for 30 years you wasted five less years that me. Whopeeeeee. I'm so glad for you.
Sorry to hear about your wife. She had to make up her mind, either she loved you or a man made ministry.
She made her choice. Maybe she will come around.
Until then, WordWolf gave you all the info. you will need. (That was great stuff WordWolf I would have loved that info. when I first joined.)
Ask for help anytime you need it and plenty of folks here will be glad to jump in.
All the best.
PB
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waysider
MAN--------Maybe you could claim that is an acronym(You know, like M.A.N.="most acrobatic ninja"---or something)
Anyway, I'm kinda bummed that everybody already gave you all the GOOD advise.( Not really :) )
Welcome to the Cafe!
Oh, don't forget there is a PM feature. I don't use it very much because I like to say most things publically but it comes in very handy for loaning each other books, etc. and for maybe stating personal info. that really does not pertain to the general community.
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coolchef
welcom man
hang in there ,most of us think you did the right thing
there is a better life after twi
trust us
it may be hard at first but it gets better
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Mister P-Mosh
Man,
As a son of someone who has been in TWI a long time (longer than you though), I can tell you that I would gladly welcome either of my parents leaving TWI for freedom. It is a really difficult thing that your wife hasn't left, but there is a chance, especially if you and your kids still prosper. She may not be there because she truly wants to be, but rather because she is afraid to leave because of the lies she has been told.
My best advice for you is to open up to your kids and get closer to them. They will help you adjust. Also remember that while much of what you learned in TWI is wrong, you should never look for another "ministry" like TWI to mislead you down another wrong path. You're a human being with a brain and can decide for yourself how to find the right way.
In any case, good luck (and the word luck won't bring devil spirits around either.)
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WordWolf
BTW,
if you stick around,
eventually probably want to call yourself something else,
something more personally descriptive.
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Belle
WELCOME!!!!
CONGRATS!!!!!!!
My ex chose that group over me, but life has gotten exponentially better for me and he's still stuck with the same oppressive teachings and beliefs that bind and imprison folks. I seriously doubt there are any truly happy people left in TWI.
Here's to much, much brighter days for you!
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RainbowsGirl
Welcome man!
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Lifted Up
Still here? We don't bite.
I dont think...
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coolchef
lifted
some of us do! lol
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excathedra
dearest man, i hope you are doing okay
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satori001
Good man!
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act2
man, that is the BEST decision you could make for yourself==walking away from THE WAY .... however, I am sorry about your marriage.
I walked away in 1994 and my life is 100 times better for it.
Take care of yourself.
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Free Soul
Way to go, Man! May I humbly suggest you take the time to read Toxic Faith - it was very helpful to me. Another good one is More Jesus, Less Religion. Happy reading!
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