The Wave and The Nod

[socks]

I was thinking this morning on my drive in to work about how little things make such a big difference sometimes. It got me to thinking - how a little thing to me can often be a huge thing to someone else.

What happened that got this train of thought stoked was...traffic. I live in a small community, with a few major traffic arteries running north and south, east and west, divided by smaller veins of neighborhood streets, homes, stores. Come 7-ish every morning, we fill them up with our cars, heading out to work, school, breakfast, wherever.

My commute consists of a couple turns to get out of our neighborhood, and then straight south, hang a Rosco due west, and in five minutes I'm at work. 12 minutes normal commute time.

On the way there's several cross streets, and as I hit the lights and stop along my way I see cars waiting at the cross streets, looking to make that turn into the main road I'm on. Waiting. Waiting, edging in looking for a break in traffic, stopping. Backing up, edging out.

Traffic has gotten thick enough that once we all get out there we back up at every light, it's pretty much like any town, I'm sure you know the drill. When I'm the one trying to get out on the main road and get going I know exactly how it feels - "Is anyone, ANYone going to let me in here, pul-eeze?!" All I need is one person to open up a space and let me skeeter across the lane and take my place in line with everyone else. I'll be good, just let me in!

What I need is The Wave and The Nod.

That's that glorious moment when one person slows down and looks at you and waves you "in" with a nod. Maybe even a smile. Or a snarl, whatever. It's the Open Space and the time to fill it that's what you need.

At it's best it's a moment of True Friendship, a non-spoken exchange of humanity and love, shared for all to see. For the Waver it's a Gift of Road Love, the real deal. To the Wavee, it's like a rush of cool fresh air on a hot muggy day. Thanks! Way to go! Yeah, right on! Love ya man! Have a nice day! Have a GREAT day! And we're on our way, together, brethren and sistern on the Road of Life, CD's playing, radios talking, coffee swishing. Life is good. We're driving now.

This morning I DID It and man did it make me feel good. It always does when I become the Road Warrior With a Heart, toss back my shield and helmet and stare across that Great Lane Divide into the eyes of another bleary eyed soldier and Do It - give them The Wave and The Nod. Come - come brother, join me sister, take your place, here - take mine. Together we drive, divided we sit. Come - let us motor together...

It's silly, I know. 5 minutes of the news on the radio and I know there's bigger fish frying everywhere I look. I got Big Fish of my own on the line. But this is my world, where I live, what I do. How I drive is who I am. It starts my day "out there", everyday. It's my first chance every morning to greet the rest of the world.

I love doing it, givin' the Nod, and feel small when I don't. "I'm in a hurry, I got business, I'm here-you're not. Hope that works out for you but I gotta keep moving or the Mom behind me in the SUV with 5 kids packed is going to shear my rear. That's it, we're shearing rears out here, and if not mine, the one in front of me is next. Gotta go! Good luck!"

The more I do it, the grander I feel. Silly, yes. But it leaks out into other things. That parking place, that door, that person with their hands full, the shelf that's too high for someone to reach. All the silly little things I deal with everyday, all day. Sometimes it seems like - that's most of what my day is made of - a lot of little silly things. Add a dash of consideration and a splash of humor and they add up to a nice package come bedtime, or can.

It's worth a shot anyway. Next thing I know I'll be making room for cyclists.

Edited March 15, 2007 by socks

[HAPe4me]

Thanks Socks, great post. I only add that when one is the beneficiary of such kindness it also feels good to acknowledge the good heart of the "waver and nodder".

~HAP

[Sushi]

You'd NEVER make it in Northeast Joisey, Socks.

[RainbowsGirl]

Dear Socks,

Love makes all the differences and it always will! Kindness and sweetness is never silly. It is an art and a gift that usually costs nothing. Little acts of Love make big and lasting impacts.

My son Josh and I were sledding with our fellowship when he was six. We had 2 sleds and long waits for turns. The man next to us had 2 sons, 4 sleds and 2 taboggons. Josh does talk much and didn't sign much then but was never shy about anything. He is very social...and he thinks, what is to me one of the very best thoughts in the world; which is: that everybody truly loves everybody else; He relentlessly looks for any new way to communicate his needs and desires. I might add he is genuinely happier than most people I know or have known and is able to win over even some of the most unlikely people. I have learned a lot about love from him. Love is so healing.

Josh sized up his situation... smiled and tugged on the man's pant leg. The Man smiled and invited him to sled with him. they both had a fantastic time... and at the end of the day he gave Josh the sled. Josh still has it and at 30yrs he still sleds on it; and holds that memory of simple acts of love.

Simply acts of love remind me of the movie "Pay It Forward" as there impacts are often life changing treasured gifts that are as great to give as recieve as you said Socks. Simply acts of love seem to grow and grow far more than the givers at times ever see.

[QuietThinker]

Hey Socks,

I had the chance to perform "The wave and The nod" twice this morning as I made my circuit to the bank. I am in good humour today, anyway, and disposed to be pleased with the planet and the people on it...however, it felt terrific to give a couple of people a lift today, since traffic was extra crummy and there was little enough room on the road in the first place.ours

I think R'sG has it right when it comes to "paying it forward" as the movie indicates. It's a great principle.

Yours road-sharingly,

~QT

[doojable]

I give the ole "wave and nod" frequently. Then, when I am the receipient of such a kindness I also give the "Thank you wave."

As the world gets smaller it also gets bigger. What I mean is that while I can chat in real time to my brother in Italy, and call a friend 1500 miles away while I wait in a parking lot for my daughter to get out of practice, it's also easier to be just behind a computer or in a car. Those rollling cubicles are great for getting places but they sure make it easier to NOT have to interact with people.

SO.....I go into the bank and greet the tellers. I try don't use the drive-thru unless I absolutely am pressed for time. I take every opportunity to keep myself firmly a part of the world around me.

It just seems that to me that if I don't do these things, these little acts of humanity, that I condemn myself to a smaller world instead of the larger one I'm ultimately seeking.

Ramble, ramble, ramble.....there I go again.

[SafariVista]

The more I do it, the grander I feel.

Nice post~

I like to do it too socks!

[TheHighWay]

Love this post!!

Know exactly what you mean.

Whenever some wonderful, generous person nods me through I always try to make sure they SEE me wave my acknowledgement... I want them to know how much I appreciate that little moment of kindness out of their lives.

Thanks Socks for bringing this to mind.

[ChattyKathy]

Socksman,

Very cool and thank you for helping take the edge off my day. I've had the angry people to contend with today and you helped remind me to pace it back and don't allow myself to spoil someone else's mood just because others have been trying to spoil mine.

I can offer people my hand in a second with honest desire to do so then in 30 seconds when a deadbeat crosses my path want to run them over.

Thanks for reminding me to chill out my friend.

Kathy

[ChasUFarley]

Call it Karma...

Call it the Golden Rule...

But I practice this when I'm driving quite a bit - especially in parking lots. I believe that I often get as many breaks as I do because I give a lot of breaks to others...

It goes really far in school parking lots, as you're going to be encountering those people every day for the next 12 years, so why not get along nicely?

Or maybe its because I drive a really wimpy car... you're not too tough when you're behind the wheel of a PT Cruiser...

[RainbowsGirl]

Dear Socks,

Love makes all the differences and it always will! Kindness and sweetness is never silly. It is an art and a gift that usually costs nothing. Little acts of Love make big and lasting impacts.

My son Josh and I were sledding with our fellowship when he was six. We had 2 sleds and long waits for turns. The man next to us had 2 sons, 4 sleds and 2 taboggons. Josh doesn't talk much and didn't sign much then but was never shy about anything. He is very social...and he thinks, what is to me one of the very best thoughts in the world; which is: that everybody truly loves everybody else; He relentlessly looks for any new way to communicate his needs and desires. I might add he is genuinely happier than most people I know or have known and is able to win over even some of the most unlikely people. I have learned a lot about love from him. Love is so healing.

Josh sized up his situation... smiled and tugged on the man's pant leg. The Man smiled and invited him to sled with him. they both had a fantastic time... and at the end of the day he gave Josh the sled. Josh still has it and at 30yrs he still sleds on it; and holds that memory of simple acts of love.

Simply acts of love remind me of the movie "Pay It Forward" as there impacts are often life changing treasured gifts that are as great to give as recieve as you said Socks. Simply acts of love seem to grow and grow far more than the givers at times ever see.

[ChattyKathy]

That was a cool movie Pay It Forward. Which came to mind with your post. :)

[RainbowsGirl]

I can see that editing is just one more thing I have a lot to learn about....Thank you everyone for your patience I only meant to change does to doesn't!

[ChattyKathy]

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

I remember the first time I did that. Then I tried to correct it and did it again. Before it was over I had 3 extra posts. But back at that time we could delete our posts.

(had to come back to edit my post and that was not to prove a point, that is because I just suck)

Edited March 15, 2007 by ChattyKathy

[RainbowsGirl]

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

I remember the first time I did that. Then I tried to correct it and did it again. Before it was over I had 3 extra posts. But back at that time we could delete our posts.

(had to come back to edit my post and that was not to prove a point, that is because I just suck)

Thanks ChattyKatty,

I am glad I am not alone............Your so sweet and I appreciate your kindness and your heart!

((((((((((((CK))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Love You!

[ChattyKathy]

My day tried to be a poopy one but things like that post has won out today.

Thanks dear. :)

[excathedra]

when someone gives me the wave and/or the nod..... i wave my thank you.... then i wave my thank you again.... and then again..... i just want to be sure they KNOW they made me happy :)

have to be careful i don't run off the road thanking them

[waysider]

That's how it is livin' "life by the drop".------------SRV

[socks]

:)

Enjoyed everyon'e's responses, much! I'm out on the road for another run. See ya back at the pass...

[Tom Strange]

It's worth a shot anyway. Next thing I know I'll be making room for cyclists.

...then we'd have to see about an intervention for you my friend from the sock drawer...

[rascal]

Great post socks, I`ll vbet you made that other motorists day, who knows, maybe they will do it for someone else.

Where we live, the smile and the nod is the general rule. Course we live in a smaller area where life is less hectic paced.

If you have car trouble, you can count on the next motorist to stop and give aid.

Everyone waves and smiles to the car in oncoming traffic. I remember once somebody visiting our area got very upset at these people whom he didn`t know constantly waving at him....lol very suspiscious behavior...lol

[ChattyKathy]

I let a school bus in this morning. For me that is a huge thing.

[socks]

That's cool!

Lights. Now, if we could figure out the lights...

[ChattyKathy]

Once on the way to church I cut around a man who was going slower than I wanted to and continued on my way. I pulled into a space in front of the church and as I was getting out another car pulled in beside me and I freaked to find it was the car I had just passed. So as the man and his wife were getting out of the car I said to them don't you just hate it when someone is in a hurry to get somewhere and they end up getting caught at the same light and rolled my eyes back in the head as they both laughed. I was glad they were good sports.

[Tom Strange]

whenever I'm in a hurry I always end up choosing the wrong lane... so I try to not be in a hurry... and sometimes it actually works...