I remember being at the point where i thought I would kill anyone who tried to destroy the ministry. I didn't just think it for a second. I literally pictured myself flying to HQ, meeting with LCM, and carrying out this kill. It was among the most serious thoughts i've ever had. I wasn't emotional about it. I was preparing myself in case it was needed.
(i don't remember why i thought this, i think i was listening to a conversation about how the adversary and his seed boys are trying to stop the word from moving, and are trying to destroy the ministry)
Thank God it never happened, or even got close to that point. Who knows, maybe it was just a 18 year old kid imagining dang. But I swear on my mothers life that if i was called in to do it, I would have.
I never discussed it with anyone. strange to think back to that. bad place.
I don't know where that idea came from. It was just there.
no wonder i went through such a tough depression when i found out TWI was/is a lie.
I don't think so. Yeah some similarities, but I am pretty sure that the vast majority of people, your average Wayfer would not have drank the cool-aid literally, or whipped out the AK-47 for his highest.
Most of the people I knew probably would have said WTF and gotten out of there. Of course, there are possibly more people like Nandon was than I realised. Which would be scary.
My ex is one of those people, I'm afraid. And I'm even more afraid to tell you that he's working security at HQ, last I heard. :unsure:
Nandon, I'm really sorry. It had to be especially rough to come to the realization that all was not what it was cracked up to be regarding TWI and what we gave our whole lives for.
Nandon----I don't think you are alone in that thinking. That attitude was quite prevalent at the time of the Bicentennial(1976). Conspiracy theories were rampant. I even remember some teachings from the OT that would have "supported" that train of thought, misguided though they were. In Fellowlaborers, we even had a special work detail to destroy all the mimeograph plates for the mailing list of the state newsletter so that "they" would not have access to the names of believers in our state. Yep. The Illuminati, the U.N., the Catholic church, The Anti Defamation League, the boogie man in the closet. They're all out to get you and stop Da Verd from going over the world. Better to take our own lives like that record in the OT than to surrunder to "the enemy". Wish I could remember that section of scripture. It's the one where the people took their own lives and when the enemy finally gained access to the city they found no one left alive. It's hard to believe I bought all that crap. P.T Barnum would have been thrilled to make my acquaintaince.
I never got that far in thinking but I do believe I came close to it. I praised LCM at any chance I got and desperately wanted to go through Corps and be assigned to HQ and serve the BOT. That was my dream, more important than marriage though that was way up there, too. Somewhere I came to my senses and left to get a career so I could make a pension at least, and not be dumped from the ministry in my senior years. Later, I felt so guilty about how I treated members of my fellowship. Thank God, they all left and all forgave me like it was nothing. I was lucky.
I was only in the ministry for 3 years. I never thought that they would go to the same extreme as Jonestown, but when the TC (Belle knows her) yelled at me that she'll follow LCM to the end of the world, that's when more red flags were raised in my mind and I decided that I had enough with this s**t of a ministry.
To that TC (S** B****m*r*), I wonder how she's enjoying the ministry now that her idol is no longer the MOG.
def59-------yes, I think it was, as you stated, Masada.
It was so many years ago I don't remember the details. I am certain,though, that I heard this teaching in TWI. I guess it just goes to show how gullible(sp?) I must have been to accept this without scriptural references. I heard this teaching at some event that had limited attendance such as the AC or FL rather than at a function open to the general TWI populace.
Were they called the Maccabees? And Masada was the place. The Roman general built a long ramp up to the walls so the soldiers could climb over? It took like a year at least, and when he finally entered the city, they had all killed their families and then themselves?
Something like that. I think there was a TV special years ago.
I will never forget one day at lunch when JAL was talking about a list that the illuminati and the russians had made about the top 100 people they would have to kill when they took over the US. He of course was on it.
I was upset, how come I didn't make the list? I just wanted to make some list that day (besides the .... list)
Were they called the Maccabees? And Masada was the place. The Roman general built a long ramp up to the walls so the soldiers could climb over? It took like a year at least, and when he finally entered the city, they had all killed their families and then themselves?
Something like that. I think there was a TV special years ago.
WG
Watered Garden
Since we both seem to remember this teaching, I'm wondering if it might not have been at a Fellowlaborer Night.
It might have been Howie Y. who taught this. (I'll say this much, at least Howie knew how to hold an audience spellbound. )What bothers me most,though, is that I was sure something other than spoken word was used to "document" this event.
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RumRunner
TWI was already well down that path IMNSHO
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Danny
Yes I think we were.
Can we say thank God for Chris or would that be going to far.
Remember that deal one Corp week Craig said something and
a guy went out and got it.
A wish or something like that was Gods word. If the mog of the hour said it that was it.
I wasn't around then but loy said something like I would gladly kill those fags.
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frank123lol
Acomment was made in the doc that sent chills up and down my spine:"They(cult leader) like to use
present truth so they can make up what they want to".
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GrouchoMarxJr
How very true...and what the lesson to be learned?...
You gotta be careful where you hang your hat or you may end up bending over for some guy in a brown suit.
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def59
Well at least they sold apple juice at ROA instead of Kool-Aid.
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Ham
and coffee..
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rhino
I see those parallels listed, but the death thing kinda kills it ...
Say doc vic is usiing up ABS so he can have his pimpmobile bus ...
corpse slaves delivering his dramboooeeee as he drones on about Ephesians ...
and he has the babes dropped at his door step ...
how does everyone committing suicide fit in that plan?
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nandon
i've said this before,
I remember being at the point where i thought I would kill anyone who tried to destroy the ministry. I didn't just think it for a second. I literally pictured myself flying to HQ, meeting with LCM, and carrying out this kill. It was among the most serious thoughts i've ever had. I wasn't emotional about it. I was preparing myself in case it was needed.
(i don't remember why i thought this, i think i was listening to a conversation about how the adversary and his seed boys are trying to stop the word from moving, and are trying to destroy the ministry)
Thank God it never happened, or even got close to that point. Who knows, maybe it was just a 18 year old kid imagining dang. But I swear on my mothers life that if i was called in to do it, I would have.
I never discussed it with anyone. strange to think back to that. bad place.
I don't know where that idea came from. It was just there.
no wonder i went through such a tough depression when i found out TWI was/is a lie.
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lindyhopper
I don't think so. Yeah some similarities, but I am pretty sure that the vast majority of people, your average Wayfer would not have drank the cool-aid literally, or whipped out the AK-47 for his highest.
Most of the people I knew probably would have said WTF and gotten out of there. Of course, there are possibly more people like Nandon was than I realised. Which would be scary.
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Belle
My ex is one of those people, I'm afraid. And I'm even more afraid to tell you that he's working security at HQ, last I heard. :unsure:
Nandon, I'm really sorry. It had to be especially rough to come to the realization that all was not what it was cracked up to be regarding TWI and what we gave our whole lives for.
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waysider
Nandon----I don't think you are alone in that thinking. That attitude was quite prevalent at the time of the Bicentennial(1976). Conspiracy theories were rampant. I even remember some teachings from the OT that would have "supported" that train of thought, misguided though they were. In Fellowlaborers, we even had a special work detail to destroy all the mimeograph plates for the mailing list of the state newsletter so that "they" would not have access to the names of believers in our state. Yep. The Illuminati, the U.N., the Catholic church, The Anti Defamation League, the boogie man in the closet. They're all out to get you and stop Da Verd from going over the world. Better to take our own lives like that record in the OT than to surrunder to "the enemy". Wish I could remember that section of scripture. It's the one where the people took their own lives and when the enemy finally gained access to the city they found no one left alive. It's hard to believe I bought all that crap. P.T Barnum would have been thrilled to make my acquaintaince.
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copenhagen
Nandon do not feel bad, I to was very sold out willing to do whatever it takes to protect the ministry.
I think it was a young man thing willing to fight or take a bullet for what we belived in.
I remember on time in some stupid meeting the limb cord was up front and someone brought a new guy.
This new person was harassing or being loud during the teaching and the limb cord said " copenhagen show him the door".
So in my young thinking and willingness to obey and protect twi from evil I grabbed this guy by the back of his shirt
and drug him to the door. I got a standing o from the crowd. While I was standing there I was thinking what the hell did just do,
where was the love in that. I do not know why I was asked or why I did it but that was how I thought.
I AM NOT PROUD OF THAT !!!!!!!!!
I do remember that mentality because at the roa lcm was ranting about copouts being there and lcm said he
did not need a bodyguard to protect himself he played football. All I could think of he was comparing himself to Al Bundy
from married with children.
copenhagen
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Eagle
I never got that far in thinking but I do believe I came close to it. I praised LCM at any chance I got and desperately wanted to go through Corps and be assigned to HQ and serve the BOT. That was my dream, more important than marriage though that was way up there, too. Somewhere I came to my senses and left to get a career so I could make a pension at least, and not be dumped from the ministry in my senior years. Later, I felt so guilty about how I treated members of my fellowship. Thank God, they all left and all forgave me like it was nothing. I was lucky.
Eagle
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FreeFromCults
I was only in the ministry for 3 years. I never thought that they would go to the same extreme as Jonestown, but when the TC (Belle knows her) yelled at me that she'll follow LCM to the end of the world, that's when more red flags were raised in my mind and I decided that I had enough with this s**t of a ministry.
To that TC (S** B****m*r*), I wonder how she's enjoying the ministry now that her idol is no longer the MOG.
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def59
I don't think anyone committed suicide, unless you are thinking of Masada, which is not in scripture.
Generally, the times of siege brought deliverance or captivity.
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waysider
def59-------yes, I think it was, as you stated, Masada.
It was so many years ago I don't remember the details. I am certain,though, that I heard this teaching in TWI. I guess it just goes to show how gullible(sp?) I must have been to accept this without scriptural references. I heard this teaching at some event that had limited attendance such as the AC or FL rather than at a function open to the general TWI populace.
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Watered Garden
Were they called the Maccabees? And Masada was the place. The Roman general built a long ramp up to the walls so the soldiers could climb over? It took like a year at least, and when he finally entered the city, they had all killed their families and then themselves?
Something like that. I think there was a TV special years ago.
WG
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Out There
I will never forget one day at lunch when JAL was talking about a list that the illuminati and the russians had made about the top 100 people they would have to kill when they took over the US. He of course was on it.
I was upset, how come I didn't make the list? I just wanted to make some list that day (besides the .... list)
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waysider
Watered Garden
Since we both seem to remember this teaching, I'm wondering if it might not have been at a Fellowlaborer Night.
It might have been Howie Y. who taught this. (I'll say this much, at least Howie knew how to hold an audience spellbound. )What bothers me most,though, is that I was sure something other than spoken word was used to "document" this event.
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Combination
http://www.npr.org/programs/specials/jonestown.html
Heres a great Radio special on the subject of Jonestown
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