A product of "over fifty years of biblical research"-
You too can benefit from the cumulative years of our researcher's work and experiences.
Included with the course:
Proper implement (bucket)
Tossed in with tuition, the "secret ingredients" (water, soap)
and one properly qualified feet-washee.
"Feet Washing 102"
Learn the exciting and exactness of bringing the training of feet washing 101 to perfection, the proper use of the drying implement.
Only an additional $149.95..
This is what I learned in twi and then the offshoot.. christian people want to be kind and can be fooled by coniving men and women who know how to make a few dollars off their willingness to serve.
and the thing is one is never really where they think they are "spiritauly because if all eles fails they will say well i have done this written that and been in the minstry for soo many years.
Jesus doesnt look at it that way he died for all of us and truly looks on our heart of love towards one another , that is why this stuff hurts.
trying to please men is a fools game , but not for nothing money can be had in it.
the comment will be IM bitter, maybe so, better to be called a name by those with their hand out in the name of a free God than to be the one running with the cash and answer to a free risen Christ some day.
Spend two weeks at a beautiful location, where you learn to perfect your skills.
With many other likeminded and motivated believers, you will learn to avoid near violent and often sarcastic confrontation, by learning how to do it right, properly manicuring the MOG/MOGETTE'S Toesies.
Here you will learn the inner hidden truths of Nail fungus, behold the inner sanctum, only seen by those who are properly qualified.
I'm under the impression, this is the lowest level class. The next level being oral cleansing of leadershi+'s uh, libidinous "lever"......(for the alliteration) The highest being the lingual laving of leadershi+'s pristine sphincter. I'm sure there are some whose favorite flavor is Preparation H.
In wondering how the board meeting went today, I present the following Simpsons quotes that seem somehow fitting:
--
Marge: Homer, a man who called himself "you-know-who" just invited you to a secret "wink-wink" at the "you-know-what". You are certainly are popular now that you've become a Stonecutter.
Homer: Oh, yeah. Beer busts, beer blasts, keggers, stein hoists, AA meetings, beer night. It's wonderful, Marge. I've never felt so accepted in all my life. These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined.
--
Homer: I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?
--
Krusty: So, have a merry Christmas, a happy Hanukkah, a kwaazy Kwanza, a tip-top Tet, and a solemn, dignified, Ramadan. And now a word from MY god, our sponsors!
--
Homer: I've always wondered if there was a god. And now I know there is -- and it's me.
--
Homer: Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals ... except the weasel.
--
Mr. Burns: I'll keep it short and sweet -- Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.
--
Chief Wiggum: I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn.
--
Sideshow Bob: Because you need me, Springfield. Your guilty conscience may force you to vote Democratic, but deep down inside you secretly long for a cold-hearted Republican to lower taxes, brutalize criminals, and rule you like a king. That's why I did this: to protect you from yourselves. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a city to run.
--
Homer: Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!
--
Homer: I've learned that life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.
--
Homer: Boy, I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.
--
Burns: Smithers, I've been thinking. Is it wrong to cheat to win a million-dollar bet?
Smithers: Yes, sir.
Burns: Let me rephrase that. Is it wrong if I cheat to win a million-dollar bet?
Smithers: No, sir. Who would you like killed?
--
Homer: When will you people learn? In America we stopped using corporal punishment and things have never been better. The streets are safe, old people strut confidently trough the darkest alleys and the weak and nerdy are admired for their computer programming abilities. So, like us, let your children run wild and free, for as the Bible tells us, "Let your children run wild and free."
I got involved in twi in my early twenties, Im past middle age now.
All of my life I also have been involved with either twi or its downfal or the offshoots and its drama.
ALL of my life.
what a waste i often think .
and it hurts.
But i wont deny truth inmy own life anymore.
truth as I see it for real. without talking my self into what must be because another put a spin it.
i often wonder what my life could have would have been with the bible verses tapes and leaders surrounding nearly every choice.
but i can only wonder. maybe wish once in a while.
but that has been my life.
so there it is.
do not tell me I do not know the pain and misery they may be feeling now, dear God have mercy on all of us because truly we know not what we do .
I never dreamed my life would have been surrounded by this stuff and i look at "normal" people, who never took pfal and now say wow how did you live why didnt I manage?
it isnt about a loss it is an ENTIRE life of drama , and "stuff" that maybe those here at GS can get.
why i do not know.
I just know it has been my life.
and the rest of the world is different and doesnt understand.
not that I have the truth, just why in hell has been the search for it been the focus for so dam long?
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Ham
"Feet Washing 101"
only $149.95.
A product of "over fifty years of biblical research"-
You too can benefit from the cumulative years of our researcher's work and experiences.
Included with the course:
Proper implement (bucket)
Tossed in with tuition, the "secret ingredients" (water, soap)
and one properly qualified feet-washee.
"Feet Washing 102"
Learn the exciting and exactness of bringing the training of feet washing 101 to perfection, the proper use of the drying implement.
Only an additional $149.95..
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Share on other sites
pond
This is what I learned in twi and then the offshoot.. christian people want to be kind and can be fooled by coniving men and women who know how to make a few dollars off their willingness to serve.
and the thing is one is never really where they think they are "spiritauly because if all eles fails they will say well i have done this written that and been in the minstry for soo many years.
Jesus doesnt look at it that way he died for all of us and truly looks on our heart of love towards one another , that is why this stuff hurts.
trying to please men is a fools game , but not for nothing money can be had in it.
the comment will be IM bitter, maybe so, better to be called a name by those with their hand out in the name of a free God than to be the one running with the cash and answer to a free risen Christ some day.
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Ham
Yeah.. and the big claim they make- "we have the BEST package"
anyone has to offer..
When in fact, it's the SAME package. Same warmed over leftovers from vic's oven..
You'd think sixty year old leftovers wouldn't be very healthy to the normal digestive system.
Edited by Mr. HammeroniLink to comment
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WOG
You've definitely got the formula down, Brokenone.
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Ham
"Feet washing 103"
Spend two weeks at a beautiful location, where you learn to perfect your skills.
With many other likeminded and motivated believers, you will learn to avoid near violent and often sarcastic confrontation, by learning how to do it right, properly manicuring the MOG/MOGETTE'S Toesies.
Here you will learn the inner hidden truths of Nail fungus, behold the inner sanctum, only seen by those who are properly qualified.
Food(?) provided.
A bargain, at $799.95.
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1broken1
Ok - don't hold back! How do you really feel?
PURGE PURGE PURGE!
"Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. " - Homer Simpson
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Ham
Naw, its not a purge. I do feel pretty good today..
Just all of the hawking these groups do for the greatest and bestest classes look more like a high motivation type informercial..
How they all can sell the same thing and claim it's different is beyond me.
Haven't had their version? somethins wrong..
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waysider
Ummm------This foot washing class ------Is it offered at UT? :blink:
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Sushi
I'm under the impression, this is the lowest level class. The next level being oral cleansing of leadershi+'s uh, libidinous "lever"......(for the alliteration) The highest being the lingual laving of leadershi+'s pristine sphincter. I'm sure there are some whose favorite flavor is Preparation H.
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1broken1
Sushi - in chaste acclamation I chuckle!
In wondering how the board meeting went today, I present the following Simpsons quotes that seem somehow fitting:
--
Marge: Homer, a man who called himself "you-know-who" just invited you to a secret "wink-wink" at the "you-know-what". You are certainly are popular now that you've become a Stonecutter.
Homer: Oh, yeah. Beer busts, beer blasts, keggers, stein hoists, AA meetings, beer night. It's wonderful, Marge. I've never felt so accepted in all my life. These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined.
--
Homer: I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?
--
Krusty: So, have a merry Christmas, a happy Hanukkah, a kwaazy Kwanza, a tip-top Tet, and a solemn, dignified, Ramadan. And now a word from MY god, our sponsors!
--
Homer: I've always wondered if there was a god. And now I know there is -- and it's me.
--
Homer: Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals ... except the weasel.
--
Mr. Burns: I'll keep it short and sweet -- Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.
--
Chief Wiggum: I hope this has taught you kids a lesson: kids never learn.
--
Sideshow Bob: Because you need me, Springfield. Your guilty conscience may force you to vote Democratic, but deep down inside you secretly long for a cold-hearted Republican to lower taxes, brutalize criminals, and rule you like a king. That's why I did this: to protect you from yourselves. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a city to run.
--
Homer: Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true!
--
Homer: I've learned that life is one crushing defeat after another until you just wish Flanders was dead.
--
Homer: Boy, I want to share something with you: The three little sentences that will get you through life. Number 1: Cover for me. Number 2: Oh, good idea, Boss! Number 3: It was like that when I got here.
--
Burns: Smithers, I've been thinking. Is it wrong to cheat to win a million-dollar bet?
Smithers: Yes, sir.
Burns: Let me rephrase that. Is it wrong if I cheat to win a million-dollar bet?
Smithers: No, sir. Who would you like killed?
--
Homer: When will you people learn? In America we stopped using corporal punishment and things have never been better. The streets are safe, old people strut confidently trough the darkest alleys and the weak and nerdy are admired for their computer programming abilities. So, like us, let your children run wild and free, for as the Bible tells us, "Let your children run wild and free."
--
Today is a day for prayer, and tomorrow.
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doojable
I'm sorry, I just can't get past the words, "package" and "JAL" in the same context.
Oh and 1broken1 - you forgot only one quote"
Montgomery Burns: "EXcellent.....!"
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1broken1
"Excellent..."
Yes, it feels complete now.
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pond
I got involved in twi in my early twenties, Im past middle age now.
All of my life I also have been involved with either twi or its downfal or the offshoots and its drama.
ALL of my life.
what a waste i often think .
and it hurts.
But i wont deny truth inmy own life anymore.
truth as I see it for real. without talking my self into what must be because another put a spin it.
i often wonder what my life could have would have been with the bible verses tapes and leaders surrounding nearly every choice.
but i can only wonder. maybe wish once in a while.
but that has been my life.
so there it is.
do not tell me I do not know the pain and misery they may be feeling now, dear God have mercy on all of us because truly we know not what we do .
I never dreamed my life would have been surrounded by this stuff and i look at "normal" people, who never took pfal and now say wow how did you live why didnt I manage?
it isnt about a loss it is an ENTIRE life of drama , and "stuff" that maybe those here at GS can get.
why i do not know.
I just know it has been my life.
and the rest of the world is different and doesnt understand.
not that I have the truth, just why in hell has been the search for it been the focus for so dam long?
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