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Name that Flick


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"You here to make fun of me too?

" No, ma'am. We at the FBI do not have a sense of humor we're aware of. May we come in?

"Sure."

"Did he say anything to you?

"Yeah, that the world is coming to an end."

"Did he say when?"

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"You here to make fun of me too?

" No, ma'am. We at the FBI do not have a sense of humor we're aware of. May we come in?

"Sure."

"Did he say anything to you?

"Yeah, that the world is coming to an end."

"Did he say when?"

 

"You chose me... so you recognized the skills, so I don't want nobody calling me son or kid or sport or nothing like that, cool?"

 

"Gentlemen, congratulations. You're everything we've come to expect from years of government training. Now please step this way, as we provide you with our final test: an eye exam..."

 

 

 

 

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"Rufus, Brint, and Meekus were like brothers to me. And when I say brother, I don't mean, like, an actual brother, but I mean it like the way black people use it. Which is more meaningful I think."

 

"I wasn't like every other kid, you know, who dreams about being an astronaut, I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree. Richard Gere's a real hero of mine. Sting. Sting would be another person who's a hero. The music he's created over the years, I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it, I respect that. I care desperately about what I do. Do I know what product I'm selling? No. Do I know what I'm doing today? No. But I'm here, and I'm gonna give it my best shot."

 

"There was a moment last night, when she was sandwiched between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesmen, where I thought, "Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman"."

 

George

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No.

"Rufus, Brint, and Meekus were like brothers to me. And when I say brother, I don't mean, like, an actual brother, but I mean it like the way black people use it. Which is more meaningful I think."

 

"I wasn't like every other kid, you know, who dreams about being an astronaut, I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree. Richard Gere's a real hero of mine. Sting. Sting would be another person who's a hero. The music he's created over the years, I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it, I respect that. I care desperately about what I do. Do I know what product I'm selling? No. Do I know what I'm doing today? No. But I'm here, and I'm gonna give it my best shot."

 

"There was a moment last night, when she was sandwiched between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesmen, where I thought, "Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman"."

 

"I'm sorry that good-looking people like us made you throw up and feel bad about yourself."

 

"Derek, that was unbelievable!"

"I know! I turned left!"

"Yeah, that too, but Derek, you saved the prime minister of Malaysia!"

"Oh, right, cool."

 

George

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Still no.  Only live actors in this film.

"Rufus, Brint, and Meekus were like brothers to me. And when I say brother, I don't mean, like, an actual brother, but I mean it like the way black people use it. Which is more meaningful I think."

 

"I wasn't like every other kid, you know, who dreams about being an astronaut, I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree. Richard Gere's a real hero of mine. Sting. Sting would be another person who's a hero. The music he's created over the years, I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it, I respect that. I care desperately about what I do. Do I know what product I'm selling? No. Do I know what I'm doing today? No. But I'm here, and I'm gonna give it my best shot."

 

"There was a moment last night, when she was sandwiched between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesmen, where I thought, "Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman"."

 

"I'm sorry that good-looking people like us made you throw up and feel bad about yourself."

 

"Derek, that was unbelievable!"

"I know! I turned left!"

"Yeah, that too, but Derek, you saved the prime minister of Malaysia!"

"Oh, right, cool."

 

  • "So I'm rappelling down Mount Vesuvius when suddenly I slip, and I start to fall. Just falling, ahh ahh, I'll never forget the terror. When suddenly I realize "Holy sh-t, Hansel, haven't you been smoking Peyote for six straight days, and couldn't some of this maybe be in your head?""

    "And?"

    "And it was. I was totally fine. I've never even been to Mount Vesuvius."

 

George

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Still not there.  This should help.

"Rufus, Brint, and Meekus were like brothers to me. And when I say brother, I don't mean, like, an actual brother, but I mean it like the way black people use it. Which is more meaningful I think."

"If there is anything that this horrible tragedy can teach us, it's that a male model's life is a precious, precious commodity. Just because we have chiseled abs and stunning features, it doesn't mean that we too can't not die in a freak gasoline fight accident."

 

"I wasn't like every other kid, you know, who dreams about being an astronaut, I was always more interested in what bark was made out of on a tree. Richard Gere's a real hero of mine. Sting. Sting would be another person who's a hero. The music he's created over the years, I don't really listen to it, but the fact that he's making it, I respect that. I care desperately about what I do. Do I know what product I'm selling? No. Do I know what I'm doing today? No. But I'm here, and I'm gonna give it my best shot."

 

"There was a moment last night, when she was sandwiched between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesmen, where I thought, "Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman"."

 

"I'm sorry that good-looking people like us made you throw up and feel bad about yourself."

 

"Derek, that was unbelievable!"

"I know! I turned left!"

"Yeah, that too, but Derek, you saved the prime minister of Malaysia!"

"Oh, right, cool."

 

  • "So I'm rappelling down Mount Vesuvius when suddenly I slip, and I start to fall. Just falling, ahh ahh, I'll never forget the terror. When suddenly I realize "Holy sh-t, Hansel, haven't you been smoking Peyote for six straight days, and couldn't some of this maybe be in your head?""

    "And?"

    "And it was. I was totally fine. I've never even been to Mount Vesuvius."

  •  

    1:  "Why do you hate models, Matilda?"

    2:  "Honestly?"

    3:  "Yes."

    2:  " I think they're vain, stupid, and incredibly self-centered."

    3:  "I totally agree with you. But how do you feel about male models?"

  •  

George

 

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Posted (edited)
"Is that a drip I hear?"
"Yeah."
"Weren't you the last one to use the bathroom?"
"So?"
"Well, did you use the faucet?"
"Yeah."
"Why didn't you turn it off?"
"I did turn it off."
"Well, if you turned it off, why am I listening to it?"
"Did it ever occur to you that it could be turned off and drip at the same time?"
"No, because if you turned it off, it wouldn't drip."
"Maybe it's broken."
"Is that what you're sayin’? It's broken?"
"Yeah, that's it; it's broken."
"You sure?"
"I'm positive."
"Maybe you didn't twist it hard enough."
"I twisted it just right."
"How can you be so sure?"
"If you will look in the manual, you will see that this particular model faucet requires a range of 10-16 foot-pounds of torque. I routinely twist the maximum allowable torquage."
"How can you be sure you used 16 foot-pounds of torque?"
"Because I used a Craftsman model 1019 Laboratory edition, signature series torque wrench. The kind used by Cal Tech High Energy physicists, and NASA engineers."
"In that case, how can you be sure that's accurate?"
"Because a split second before the torque wrench was applied to the faucet handle, it had been calibrated by top members of the state and federal Departments of Weights and Measures, to be dead-on balls accurate. Here's the certificate of validation."
"Dead-on balls accurate"?"
"It's an industry term."
"I guess the f*in’ thing is broken."
Edited by WordWolf
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"Is that a drip I hear?"
"Yeah."
"Weren't you the last one to use the bathroom?"
"So?"
"Well, did you use the faucet?"
"Yeah."
"Why didn't you turn it off?"
"I did turn it off."
"Well, if you turned it off, why am I listening to it?"
"Did it ever occur to you that it could be turned off and drip at the same time?"
"No, because if you turned it off, it wouldn't drip."
"Maybe it's broken."
"Is that what you're sayin’? It's broken?"
"Yeah, that's it; it's broken."
"You sure?"
"I'm positive."
"Maybe you didn't twist it hard enough."
"I twisted it just right."
"How can you be so sure?"
"If you will look in the manual, you will see that this particular model faucet requires a range of 10-16 foot-pounds of torque. I routinely twist the maximum allowable torquage."
"How can you be sure you used 16 foot-pounds of torque?"
"Because I used a Craftsman model 1019 Laboratory edition, signature series torque wrench. The kind used by Cal Tech High Energy physicists, and NASA engineers."
"In that case, how can you be sure that's accurate?"
"Because a split second before the torque wrench was applied to the faucet handle, it had been calibrated by top members of the state and federal Departments of Weights and Measures, to be dead-on balls accurate. Here's the certificate of validation."
"Dead-on balls accurate"?"
"It's an industry term."
"I guess the f*in’ thing is broken."
================================
 
"No. They didn't have enough time."
"Well, how much time was they in the store?"
"Five minutes."
"Five minutes? Are you sure? Did you look at your watch?"
"No."
"Oh, oh, oh, I'm sorry. You testified earlier that the boys went into the store, and you had just begun to make breakfast. You were just ready to eat, and you heard a gunshot. That's right. I'm sorry. So obviously, it takes you five minutes to make breakfast."
"That's right."
"So you knew that. Uh, do you remember what ya had?"
"Eggs and grits."
"Eggs and grits. I like grits too. How do you like your grits? You like 'em regular, creamy or al dente?"
"Just regular, I guess."
"Regular. Instant grits?"
"No self-respectin’ Southerner uses instant grits. I take pride in my grits."
"So, Mr. Tipton. How could it take you five minutes to cook your grits, when it takes the entire grit-eating world twenty minutes?"
"I dunno. I'm a fast cook, I guess."
"I'm sorry, I was all the way over here. I couldn't hear you. Did you just say you're a fast cook, that’s it!? Are we to believe that boiling water soaks into a grit... faster in your kitchen... than on any place on the face of the Earth!?"
"I don't know."
"Well, perhaps the laws of physics cease to exist on your stove! Were these magic grits? I mean, did you buy them from the same guy who sold Jack his beanstalk beans!?"
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"Since my customary farewell would appear oddly self-serving, I shall simply say...Good luck."

 

"While the essence of our culture has been saved in the elders who now reside upon this ship, I estimate no more than 10,000 have survived. I am now a member of an endangered species."

 

George

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"Hi, I'm Amanda Buckman. Why are you dressed like that?"  "Like what?"  "Like you're going to a funeral. Why are you dressed like somebody died?"     "Wait."

 

"So... you still desire me after all these years? The old ball and chain?"   "Forever!"   "I'll get them!"

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