Google images might be a place to start if you put a description of what the painting is. Also if you know where he lives, maybe you can do a search on local artists and maybe a picture might be included with any articles on him. Just a thought.
If he says that he's 'pretty well known', then he shouldn't have any problem giving you his last name. I mean, if privacy is his concern, he doesn't have to give out his address/phone number.
That's what I thought, if he's well known, what would be the problem in knowing his last name and yes he did give me his e-mail but that doesn't help out, he could have a zillion e-mail addresses! And yes I am a bit leery !
My first thought was that you were being strung along. My second thought was that he's been burned before and is being cautious. Men get stalked too.
(My third thought was why are cowgirls hanging out with artists :) )
So, as the Russians say, "trust but verify".
Search his email address on google groups and see if anything interesting comes up. As you said, he could be using multiple email addresses, but it's still worth a shot. Google image is definitely worth a try.
I'd advise no further emotional involvement with the guy until you sort this out.
Depending on his level of success, he may feel the need to try to separate the "star ....ers" from the honest women just looking for a real relationship.
He might be trying to find the balance between being completely honest and not making himself a target.
Or, he could be one of the many compulsive liars (or worse) that abound on the internet.
I would keep an open mind, but be on the look out for inconsistencies or warning signs. I would also let him know that his story sounds suspicious, but you are willing (if you are willing) to continue to explore the relationship.
That being said, I also recommend Google's image search. It is very handy!!
Bek's first idea are mine as well. Something like a person of wealth....like me for who I am, not what's in my wallet. Or, in this case for what I am, not my reputation as an artist.
I'd suggest keeping your heart safe while continuing your conversation. There are plenty of good people out there chatting away and it's too bad all the bad guys get all the attention. You just could possibly have struck gold....dig a little deeper and you'll know for sure.
Not to be a spoilsport or anything, but it was our own President Reagan who coined "trust, but verify".
He popularized it by turning around the Russian phrase and using it against the Soviet Union, which at the time wanted a disarmament treaty without verification.
I am not a believer in internet dating sites...just because of the inability to verify someone's reality.
Have you given him your first and last name? Did he ask for the information or did you volunteer the information? What information have you given him about you that he won't give you about him? Did you know that more than 35% of those registered on such sites are married? That's more than 1 in 3.
What would Dr Phil say? I think he'd say that if you can't find out about this person BEFORE you go on with any interactions with him, then DON'T BOTHER going on.
Someone who is well known doesn't need...and more than likely doesn't want...to be on an internet dating site. ESPECIALLY if this someone has some $ behind him.
I appreciate all the advice, but no need to worry, I am not anywhere involved with this guy and I am in no hurry to meet him, we're just talking on MSN and the e-mail he has of mine is an alias, he has no more info on me at all.
I do enjoy the online dating sites and there are alot of advantages to it which I won't get into, heck you could meet a guy in person and he could still feed you a line so you are taking a risk both ways either online or meeting someone in your community or wherever. Same kind of thing as on that "Trust thread" To be totally honest I have met quite a few wonderful people with the online dating and they have turned out to be pretty decent but they weren't quite what I was looking for or vice versa and so we move on, but I'm not here to convince you of the on-line dating thing.
In regards to his last name, all he said was, he wasn't ready to give it to me yet and that's fine!
I am not computer savy, I know how to do the image thing but how do you search someone's e-mail on google, I've never done it before?
Thanks so much for showing that you care and I didn't take your message as you being judgemental at all. Maybe I came across as trying to defend my position too strong and I don't mean to. I want to share something with you, just a few days ago I got into an argument with someone because he didn't want me going up north on a weekend to hear someone play the guitar so he ended up telling me, "You know what you're problem is, you just don't want anyone to care about you or showing that they care" I thought about it afterwards and it's not that I don't want someone to care about me, it's just that I have this control issue. I came from a very controling and V.A. marriage.
I am finally at the point in my life, I love my independence I can come and go as I want, I don't have to answer to anyone and if I never settle down I'm ok with that. I guess in a way you could say I'm sowing my wild oats. So when someone starts saying "You should or you shouldn't, or you need to do such and such, right away I start thinking they are trying to control me and I want out, don't try and cage me in, so to speak, but when I think it through, I realize they are saying it because they care, just like you and I really appreciate that, CoolWaters.
Just wanted to let you know that everything checks out, He gave me his last name and I checked him out on the net! He is quite the artist, he even has some of his art work published on postage stamps. One of the awards he won was down in the US. It was the 1st time in contest history for an artist outside the US to win the award ! He has sent me quite a few of his paintings and they sure are beautiful! And I know, there's lots more to know about him, so like I said I'm in no hurry whatsoever. Anyways I just wanted to say thanks again for all your tips!
Could it be that he also has a right to protecting his own identity, since he doesnt really know you all that well either?
Just a thought, not sure if it's right or wrong.
There is actually a whole chapter in Dr. Phil's love smart book about internet dating..and of course that is just his take on it, and his side of a story, but it's actually pretty good. It's called "Fishing with a Net".
In that I have done some internet dating, and have actually met some of the people, the best advice is to forward his profile and whatever you do know to a friend, and get their take on it. It is sometimes very helpful to be able to do that, just to have a second opinion about the guy. In here, you will get many, including mine, and you dont even know me..I have struck out for the most part, but one of the biggest lessions that I am learning for myself is to not get too wrapped up in it all, or too obseessive about it, which is where I have failed in my recent past. Its harder with these types of deals, but ultimately there will be some degree of trust that is either built or it's not. I JUST got an email from someone who wants to meet me tommorrow night for coffee, and says he will pick me up...well, the answer to that is HELL no, I will meet you somewhere, give your profile to a friend, give your cell phone number to a friend, tell the friend what restaurant I will be at, have the friend call me somewhere in the middle of it to make sure that I am not in a ditch somewhere, and I will call the friend on my way home from the date. Its just a avenue to meet people, thats all, and usually after one meeting you know pretty fast whether or not its pursuable, just as if you met someone on the street somewhere, or through a friend. No difference in my mind, and IF I pick a well lit place and make sure he leaves before or after me, those are a ton of precautions.
I dont know how far this guy is from you, but just keep asking a lot of questions, and you will find out what he's really all about in a matter of time. In here, you can be anyone....and give people the perception that you are something you are not, that is true...so, be careful...but don't let it stop you from living your life.
Cynic: You are quite a sleuth! I don't see any difference between those pictures. I do like the man's artwork, however.
Prayingfordaylight: Your post is one of the best concise descriptions of how to protect one's self when dating in general - let alone over the INTERNET. Even if someone sets you up - and you don't know the person, those are good rules. If I had a daughter going away to college where she knew absolutely nobody, they would be a good guideline for her. I know college campuses are pretty well closed and everyone pretty nearly knows everyone else, but it's too easy to get into trouble over your head midst all the excitement and newness of it all in the early weeks. I particularly like the cell phone ideas. (But of course I'm an old lady who remembers when gentlemen came to the door and had to pass house inspection before I could walk across the thresh hold with him ;))
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MCarroll
Google images might be a place to start if you put a description of what the painting is. Also if you know where he lives, maybe you can do a search on local artists and maybe a picture might be included with any articles on him. Just a thought.
Good luck on your search!
MC
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GarthP2000
Hhmmm.
If he says that he's 'pretty well known', then he shouldn't have any problem giving you his last name. I mean, if privacy is his concern, he doesn't have to give out his address/phone number.
Did he give you his email?
Caution is advised on this one, I think. <_<
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Cowgirl
Hi Garth !,
That's what I thought, if he's well known, what would be the problem in knowing his last name and yes he did give me his e-mail but that doesn't help out, he could have a zillion e-mail addresses! And yes I am a bit leery !
MCarroll, Thanks for the tips, I appreciate it!
Cowgirl
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Jim
My first thought was that you were being strung along. My second thought was that he's been burned before and is being cautious. Men get stalked too.
(My third thought was why are cowgirls hanging out with artists :) )
So, as the Russians say, "trust but verify".
Search his email address on google groups and see if anything interesting comes up. As you said, he could be using multiple email addresses, but it's still worth a shot. Google image is definitely worth a try.
I'd advise no further emotional involvement with the guy until you sort this out.
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bek
Just my two cents (if it's even worth that),
Depending on his level of success, he may feel the need to try to separate the "star ....ers" from the honest women just looking for a real relationship.
He might be trying to find the balance between being completely honest and not making himself a target.
Or, he could be one of the many compulsive liars (or worse) that abound on the internet.
I would keep an open mind, but be on the look out for inconsistencies or warning signs. I would also let him know that his story sounds suspicious, but you are willing (if you are willing) to continue to explore the relationship.
That being said, I also recommend Google's image search. It is very handy!!
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krys
Bek's first idea are mine as well. Something like a person of wealth....like me for who I am, not what's in my wallet. Or, in this case for what I am, not my reputation as an artist.
I'd suggest keeping your heart safe while continuing your conversation. There are plenty of good people out there chatting away and it's too bad all the bad guys get all the attention. You just could possibly have struck gold....dig a little deeper and you'll know for sure.
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Sushi
Not to be a spoilsport or anything, but it was our own President Reagan who coined "trust, but verify".
and,
"You just could possibly have struck gold....dig a little deeper and you'll know for sure."
Surely, you're not suggesting Cowgirl is a 'gold digger'.
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Jim
He popularized it by turning around the Russian phrase and using it against the Soviet Union, which at the time wanted a disarmament treaty without verification.
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CoolWaters
I am not a believer in internet dating sites...just because of the inability to verify someone's reality.
Have you given him your first and last name? Did he ask for the information or did you volunteer the information? What information have you given him about you that he won't give you about him? Did you know that more than 35% of those registered on such sites are married? That's more than 1 in 3.
What would Dr Phil say? I think he'd say that if you can't find out about this person BEFORE you go on with any interactions with him, then DON'T BOTHER going on.
Someone who is well known doesn't need...and more than likely doesn't want...to be on an internet dating site. ESPECIALLY if this someone has some $ behind him.
IMO, this stinks, stinks, STINKS. IMO.
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krys
sushi said"
Of course not sushi! Come on - - wouldn't you say Abi struck gold when she found you???? That's what I meant.
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Cowgirl
I appreciate all the advice, but no need to worry, I am not anywhere involved with this guy and I am in no hurry to meet him, we're just talking on MSN and the e-mail he has of mine is an alias, he has no more info on me at all.
I do enjoy the online dating sites and there are alot of advantages to it which I won't get into, heck you could meet a guy in person and he could still feed you a line so you are taking a risk both ways either online or meeting someone in your community or wherever. Same kind of thing as on that "Trust thread" To be totally honest I have met quite a few wonderful people with the online dating and they have turned out to be pretty decent but they weren't quite what I was looking for or vice versa and so we move on, but I'm not here to convince you of the on-line dating thing.
In regards to his last name, all he said was, he wasn't ready to give it to me yet and that's fine!
I am not computer savy, I know how to do the image thing but how do you search someone's e-mail on google, I've never done it before?
Thanks
Cowgirl
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rhino
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WordWolf
Go to google.
Type in the full email address, in quotes. Hit "Google Search".
Example:
Let's say you were looking for "goto", whose email address is
"goto@hell.com".
You'd type in "goto@hell.com" and see what came up.
If there's many hits, some might be samples off of
web-crawlers and so on. However, those where it's in a profile
as an address, or a signature has it, or it's in a sentence like
"you can reach me at..." and so on.
IF he ever typed it anywhere, that may show it.
No guarantee he did, or that he did in a place where a Google cache would
pick it up.
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CoolWaters
Cowgirl,
If I have come across as chastising or judging or something like that, I am sorry. I simply meant to be protective.
I know you're a grown woman and all that...I just like you a whole lot and wouldn't want to see you hurt in any way.
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Cowgirl
Hi there CoolWaters :)
Thanks so much for showing that you care and I didn't take your message as you being judgemental at all. Maybe I came across as trying to defend my position too strong and I don't mean to. I want to share something with you, just a few days ago I got into an argument with someone because he didn't want me going up north on a weekend to hear someone play the guitar so he ended up telling me, "You know what you're problem is, you just don't want anyone to care about you or showing that they care" I thought about it afterwards and it's not that I don't want someone to care about me, it's just that I have this control issue. I came from a very controling and V.A. marriage.
I am finally at the point in my life, I love my independence I can come and go as I want, I don't have to answer to anyone and if I never settle down I'm ok with that. I guess in a way you could say I'm sowing my wild oats. So when someone starts saying "You should or you shouldn't, or you need to do such and such, right away I start thinking they are trying to control me and I want out, don't try and cage me in, so to speak, but when I think it through, I realize they are saying it because they care, just like you and I really appreciate that, CoolWaters.
Thanks again,
Cowgirl
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Cowgirl
Just wanted to let you know that everything checks out, He gave me his last name and I checked him out on the net! He is quite the artist, he even has some of his art work published on postage stamps. One of the awards he won was down in the US. It was the 1st time in contest history for an artist outside the US to win the award ! He has sent me quite a few of his paintings and they sure are beautiful! And I know, there's lots more to know about him, so like I said I'm in no hurry whatsoever. Anyways I just wanted to say thanks again for all your tips!
Cowgirl
Here is a sample of some of his stuff.....
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washingtonweather
here was a quick search on google for watercolor ducks
http://images.google.com/images?hl=en&hs=V...oe=UTF-8&tab=wi
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topoftheworld
Hmmm..there is a Corp guy who used to do similiar watercolors.
Interesting.
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WhiteDove
Hey you!
Has it occured to you he might just be after the "rest" of your 136 tomato plants? Take care.......
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prayingfordaylight
Could it be that he also has a right to protecting his own identity, since he doesnt really know you all that well either?
Just a thought, not sure if it's right or wrong.
There is actually a whole chapter in Dr. Phil's love smart book about internet dating..and of course that is just his take on it, and his side of a story, but it's actually pretty good. It's called "Fishing with a Net".
In that I have done some internet dating, and have actually met some of the people, the best advice is to forward his profile and whatever you do know to a friend, and get their take on it. It is sometimes very helpful to be able to do that, just to have a second opinion about the guy. In here, you will get many, including mine, and you dont even know me..I have struck out for the most part, but one of the biggest lessions that I am learning for myself is to not get too wrapped up in it all, or too obseessive about it, which is where I have failed in my recent past. Its harder with these types of deals, but ultimately there will be some degree of trust that is either built or it's not. I JUST got an email from someone who wants to meet me tommorrow night for coffee, and says he will pick me up...well, the answer to that is HELL no, I will meet you somewhere, give your profile to a friend, give your cell phone number to a friend, tell the friend what restaurant I will be at, have the friend call me somewhere in the middle of it to make sure that I am not in a ditch somewhere, and I will call the friend on my way home from the date. Its just a avenue to meet people, thats all, and usually after one meeting you know pretty fast whether or not its pursuable, just as if you met someone on the street somewhere, or through a friend. No difference in my mind, and IF I pick a well lit place and make sure he leaves before or after me, those are a ton of precautions.
I dont know how far this guy is from you, but just keep asking a lot of questions, and you will find out what he's really all about in a matter of time. In here, you can be anyone....and give people the perception that you are something you are not, that is true...so, be careful...but don't let it stop you from living your life.
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Cynic
Cowgirl,
Assuming those were actually ~his~ photos you posted, here is a link that seems to reveal the identity of your potential man:
http://ndow.org/about/stamp/
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krys
Cynic: You are quite a sleuth! I don't see any difference between those pictures. I do like the man's artwork, however.
Prayingfordaylight: Your post is one of the best concise descriptions of how to protect one's self when dating in general - let alone over the INTERNET. Even if someone sets you up - and you don't know the person, those are good rules. If I had a daughter going away to college where she knew absolutely nobody, they would be a good guideline for her. I know college campuses are pretty well closed and everyone pretty nearly knows everyone else, but it's too easy to get into trouble over your head midst all the excitement and newness of it all in the early weeks. I particularly like the cell phone ideas. (But of course I'm an old lady who remembers when gentlemen came to the door and had to pass house inspection before I could walk across the thresh hold with him ;))
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washingtonweather
ditto cynic....i looked a bit but you got the picture...NAILED IT DUDE
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prayingfordaylight
krysilis-
Thank you, it comes from living and learning about life and about people.
Cyniic- do you hire out your services?? JUST KIDDING...(no IM NOT..yes I am, no Im not, yes I am)
Okay, enough of that!
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