Bramble

The stress we lived under those last years could not be healthy. And what about some of our leaders? I'm pretty sure we were dealing with a mental illness with one of our leaders--and we were supposed to obey these guys. Just agreeing mentally that you should be obeying these guys is mentally unhealthy and dangerous. Why would an adult need to obey a church leader in matters that involve personal, private life? When I think back to our last few years IN...stress, anxiety, constant 'failure', working to find excuses to keep the kids away from the fellowship, never able to keep up with all the ministry busywork(listening to SStapes as a couple, then separately to 'work' it), knowing you're about one issue from getting the boot, knowing your leadership is watching to find that one issue, the vanishing of ministry 'friends', who have picked up that you are out of favor and they don't want to get close lest they too get out of favor', the friendly chit chat after fellowship that is really not friendly and is looking for a weakness or a reason to accuse...we're lucky we didn't have strokes. My husband and I took a 3 week vacation to visit family in another area in the country. The contrast was huge. Real people, genuinely glad to see you, not looking for trouble but celebrating a visit from family not seen for a few years. A million small kindnesses they didn't even notice they are doing, because that is how they always lived. Laughter when all the little kids moved the modualr furniture into a circle in the den and were found marching round the circle on the furniture, Grandpa piling a bunch of scrap wood on his deck so the little kids could play blocks. Returning to reproof etc...that's when we left. Finally figured out something was really wrong with God's one true household.

This was the first Christmas without my brother in law, who died suddenly at the age of 47 last spring. Very quiet and low key, normally my sis has about 40 peopel over for dinner but this year it was just immediate family. My one year old great neice got way too spoiled but brought much joy. It was cold, half the time all the dogs were in the house and it got chaotic now and then. My 86 year old aunt drove 5 hours by herself on winter highways and gave me a quilt he mother made her for a wedding present in the 1940's. My mother died right before CHristmas a few years ago, and my dad died right after Christmas a year before her so it is a time of memories for my family. It was nice to be together, the teens played wii until their arms hurt. Emotionally it was alot more complicated than the Christmases when everyone was with us.

Vows made to a TWI program were sacred and carried huge consequences if broken because they were made to GOD, but ordinary vows like marriage or child support were not nearly so important and could be broken--sometimes leadersh1+ even counseled divorce or giving up child custody to get out of the payments, so you could do a ministry program. Family wasn't nearly as important as a ministry program! God not being all that interested in family or childrearing, but in winning converts.

I'really thankful my marriage is nothing like my wow year. No ranting leadersh1+, no wondering how to pay next months rent, no hearing how wow sis and I should do all the houseold chores as prep for marriage and let the guys be men of God...aka lazy order spewing machines...

Well, it probably has to do with Dec 21, 2012. A trial run of the Planet X evil lizard aliens who will invade earth and eat us all, thereby changing Life As We Know It Forever. That spiral beam is how they travel, of course. They were just practicing for the Big Day.

I found that friendship in TWI was pretty shallow in the end. Friends were expected to reveal dirt about other friends to the leadership or be in trouble themselves, so it was easier to just not know too much. The three plus meetings a week were not intimate friend meets, everyone wore their perfect faithful believer suit and conversation was constrained to ministry-speak. There was little time outside the schedule to just hang out or do something pleasant with a friend. Moms of young children did try, but TWi was absolutly unsupportive and stressful for young families so friendship wasn't really the issue, survival was. And you certainly didn't reveal any problem you had with TWI!

Somewhere along the TWI way we (I know, not everyone, but the ones so greatly affected) lost our--or did not have-- the skill to go to our god ourselves. Instead we filtered our beliefs through authorities who spoke with confidence an surety. And they chided us, treated us like naughty children or good children. Instead of growing into maturity, I think in many ways we stayed stuck in a late adolesence and tried to deal with very complex issues with out the skills or maturity such things needed. The big bad wolf did decieve, was strong and evil, yet Little Red Ridinghood ultimately defeated him. With some help.

I work for a private business with key stroke security. I can only read newspapers online, and cannot sign in to any site or forum. Forbidden. Can't even sign into my bank account.

I had complications from the swine flu( which I got in October), and am finally going back to work. Very nasty if you have other lung conditions, so I urge you to get a shot if you are at risk, or at least start the antivirals if you do get it. I did not, thinking my lung condition so much improved. Huh. Stupid on my part and I payed for it. I'll probably not be breathing right for months.:(

That is so cool! I hope you are wildly successful with this.

"I resign."

If you think you were diagnosed wrongly, seek a second evaluation. Without a correct diagnosis you will not get the correct treatment. Correct treatment makes life better. But ugly hard illnesses do not go away because you don't want to have them. You can't think them away or ignore them. The brain is a physical organ and can have illness that affects moods and thoughts.

Fridge is full: Many condiments and salad dressings, three jellies. Gallon of milk. Gallon of homemade turkey soup for dinner this week. Pitcher Ice tea. Lean ham for lunch. 18 pkg eggs.Leftovers from the turkey we don't want, to feed to cats. Sliced Swiss cheese, Cheddar block, tortillas, 2lb lean hamburger. Bag homemade venison jerky. Buttermilk for baking. 10 yogurts. In those new green bags for longer life:Celery, carrots, green peppers, 3 lb apples, bagged lettuce, cabbage in drawers. Dec supply of insulin. Lb of butter, tub of low everything margarine. Some food(cheese and tortillas has marker writing--For dinner ) so the kids won't inhale for snack. Small freezer is full( we have a bigger one in the garage) 2 boxes Crystal Lite popsicles. Ice . Bags of turkey pieces for stirfry or whatever. Mango ice cream. Two loaves of bread. 2 bags frozen broccoli, 1 bag mixed frozen veg, 1 bag frozen strawberries. Family of 5 , three teens. Menu for dinner: M Soup and grilled sandwiches. T Beef burritos. W Spaghetti, TH Broccoli/Cabbage stir fry. Friday is leftover night. First one home starts cooking.

Glad you have such a good friend. Meds sure can be hard to deal with. Currently I'm on two that make me nauseous and one that affects my short term memory. Yuck. But they are temporary.

I no longer think it is possible for a human being to have more than a glimpse of spiritual truth.The best we do is find symbols, beliefs of what we think might be, what settles in each person's heart as truth or understanding. What makes sense.

Most doctors really do want to help ease suffering Roy. Many people with mental illness have been helped with medications, and some find counseling helps too, to talk with someone who understands what you are going through. I do not think the doctors and those that want you to see a doctor are trying to hurt you, but are trying to help you feel better. If your life is full of trouble, maybe seeking help from doctors and medications would help ease things. There is nothing wrong with getting help. I know that taking the meds, and maybe having to have them try different ones until they find the right ones for you is really tough. But it can be done. Have you heard of Nami? http://www.nami.org/ They have a good website. I have a brother with Paranoid Schizophrenia, bipolar and OCD.

Can a person practice the law of believing without condemnation creeping in? If you believe your believing is responsible for all the ills you experience in life, isn't life one big check up from the neck up? Especially when bad/sad things do happen unexpectedly? An illness, a lay off, a child's accident... Doesn't the mind then go to 'Where did I miss it? How could I have blown it this bad?' Seems to me that is a built in part of the Law of Believing in practical application.

Inanna descends to the underworld, a death or death like act, though the poem has many interpretations. Some say it was an attempt to conquer the underworld, some call it a wisdom journey, or an acceptance of her darkside. Nevertheless, she ascends from the Underworld, a resurrection for the world of death.

Maybe you are much much younger than I initially thought.

Acute bronchitis, yay not pneumonia. I still will get the flu shot since I seem to get the flu always followed by complications like bronchitis or pneumonia. I've never had areaction to a flu shot, but sure have been kicked around by the flu. So have a short burst of steroids and all kinds of other meds to try to tame the asthma. Not fond of steroids but this is just for 6 days and my breathing isn't clearing up with the other treatments. Hard to do anything when you can't catch your breath. Rescued a cute little tom cat, maybe 5 months old. He's at the vet for shots and a fix, then will go to a no-kill-no-cage shelter about 5 hours away in a few weeks(housed at a volunteer's home until then). Sure would like to see a no-kill open up here, but they do take funding.

What do you really know, Clay Jay, about the actual real lives of the posters on this board? How can you be so positive they haven't 'moved on?' And why do they have to 'move on' Sounds like they make you uncomfortable. Should never speak a negative, the boogey man will gitcha. Yeah, we all remember that Way doctrine. Very helpful to keep info down about abusive situations and leaders! Lest the ministry be blamed. Let's all pretend everything was perfect!!! Do you really think posters here have whole lives that revolve around posts on GSC??? Live their entire lives in the PFAL past, alone and feeble because of all the evil their negatives have brought down on their heads? Fooey. That's VPW induced fantasy. Too many times poster with the agenda of shushing negatives about TWI/VPW come on here and pretend they are just 'Speaking the truth in love' when what they really have is a desire to stop seeing their beloved doctrine and Man o God disrespected. So far you look like one of those.

My fever went away and I went back to work but shucky durn, things took a turn(I have severe asthma) and I need to go in for a chest xray for possible pneumonia. I usually do get the flu shot for this reason, but the swine flu vaccine was hard to get here.

Amazing how many times someone comes along wanting GSC posters to shut the heck up. For our own good, of course.

The really sad part about the law of believing was how it played out in the group of believers. Everyone would have ups and downs, things that didn't come to pass...but when a faithful believer was struck with a tragedy, say a death or a terrible illness, there was no comfort. It was 'check up from the neck up' 'how did the adversary get in there' reproof and correction. Cold shoulders because 'weakness brings down strenght. Perhaps in TWI(90's) it would be a case for a LOA. While in other churches, those same issues would have galvanized the church into prayer, perhaps meals organized, volunteer sitters and housekeepers, fund raising for bills--you know, a caring community pulling together to help one of their own. heck, even my Dad's Moose Lodge did that type of stuff! I was in TWI 20 years, never saw it happen--though we did provide meals and cleaning for leaders.

I see I was a mom on this thread. Five years! Happy to say all my kids are alive and well and a foot taller than I am.