Wow, this subject hasn't come up here in a long time. I'm glad it has because I'm one of those family members that has a loved one buried on their sacred grounds, in the way woods, at the campfire area and it's been a rough road some days since my choice to wave buhbye to TWI, knowing full well that I was also leaving the cremated remains of my husband behind also.
I thank Doug, and have personally, for his tenacity and willingness to take the action he took as it afforded my eldest daughter a little more freedom to visit TWI grounds shortly after Doug's legal matters and she was able to, with TWI permission, get some of the dirt from where her dad is buried.
Some of the things that have changed, allegedly because of Doug's actions, however, hurt our heart too, but of TWI's decision, not Doug's.
They removed the names of the dead from the cabin in the woods wall. Remember those plaques on that west wall? They're gone, which is very sad to us.
If we want to travel and make a visit to TWI grounds and pay our respects like a family might at the cemetary, we do have to contact them and make arrangements and jump through some of their hoops, but we, as a family, have decided that it's better than the possibility that we'd flat be turned away.
My youngest daughter was only 23 months when her daddy died, so she has no memory of those woods, we were not there when his remains were interred into that ground and she's never visited; therefore it comforts this mama to know that she can visit now if she so chooses, even if it means she has to follow some protocol.
I accepted then as well as now that I was making a choice when the Board of Trustees invited me and my mother in law to have his remains buried there. I was not without understanding that, even while in TWI, the area would not be accessible to me and my girls, simply because of distance. I accepted the invitation because my husband loved those woods, period. Well, there was the ease of dealing with the gypsy life of a TWI person; it did give me security of location at the time.
When Doug invited me and my eldest to participate in the court proceedings, that put me in a place of decision making, as well and I chose not to ask my eldest to testify as to her father's death in terms of where he's buried and getting to the area, etc. Additionally, my husband's family was still involved at that time. However,the decision(s) weren't made without a LOT of consideration and I supported Doug 100% and was thankful for someone having the guts to try to facilitate change.
Yes, one might suggest that anyone proceeding with legal matters could be looking for publicity, but on the other hand, publicity pointed at this issue did some good.
I am not sure how I might have considered Doug's actions differently were I not a widow and mama involved.