Abigail

"Imagine it! No more ghastly mornings like 9/11, no more ghastly incidents like this devastating earthquake which when it is all said and done, will probably have killed well over 100,000 fellow humans. No more WW I's or II's, or a looming WW III, with nukes and all. No more pestilences like the Black Plague, leprosy, cholera, or today's major fear word disease, cancer. No more AIDS, MS, muscular distrophy, leukemia, heart attacks to fear, car wrecks, late night emergency room visits, calls by the police in the middle of the night when one is informed that a loved one was just killed, murdered, or raped. No more rapes, no more child molestations. " I would love to see an end to those things as well. I also think it is within the scope of humanity to bring an end to most of them. I also think, no more Christmas mornings watching my children's faces light up as they open their presents. No more afternoons watching them figure out how to balance on ice skates and eventually succeed. No more holding hands with my 1000Names or cuddling with him on the couch. Nope, I'm just not ready to give those things up yet. Def, "Well, when you believe in afterlife and that's your goal, then getting it started with a flourish is something fun to look forward to." I do believe in an afterlife, but it is not my goal. Right now my goal is to make the most of the life I have been given right here and now.

There is a theory within Judaism, I will explain it as best I can, but please bear with me. You have to start with the idea that the first few chapters of Genesis are figurative, not literal. There was no literal "tree of life" or "tree of good and evil". When God told Adam not to eat of the tree of good and evil, it was not so much a command as a "warning", or perhaps better yet an "explanation". Eating of the "tree" had to do with a choice regarding an action. If you eat of the tree, these things are going to occur. . a) you will have a higher level of knowledge/thinking b) you will eventually die, or perhaps simply have an awareness of the fact that eventually you will die. It was sort of an evolutionary step forward which made humans able to think on levels far above what your typical animal can do (beyond basic instinct, etc.) But man had to make the free will choice to take this step forward with full understanding of the benefits and consequences. In this way, we all now have the ability to think, we all have a greater sense of self awareness, and we all have free will choice as opposed to basic instincts. Many Jews do not believe in the concept of original sin and almost none believe we are all born sinners.

"I lost a wife due to the "ministry", but then again, I probably would not have married her in the first place had it not been for the ministry. I don't even know whether that is good or bad ..." That pretty much sums up my story as well,though obviously, it was a husband. We met before I was in TWI, at the time he was a "cop-out". He returned to TWI so I could "learn the word." By the time we had jumped through all the required hoops to get married, I had serious second thoughts. I was very strongly advised not to cancell or put off the wedding after having jumped through all those hoops. With our without TWI, I think the marriage would have had some serious problems, but TWI made them far far worse. And like Belle, when I had doubts or disagreements with TWI, I usually kept them to myself. In the end that furthered the distrust my ex had for me. I left TWI before he did, and before I left the marriage. I know they counseled him to leave me, put pressure on him. The pressure was more than he could bear but he never did leave me - just pushed me out the door instead. Now that he is out, we get along much better. I can almost always tell when he feels like he is in control of his life or someone else is by how he is behaving. For a long time after leaving TWI he was doing very very well in that respect. I think his new girlfriend holds the reigns pretty tightly though, cause he's starting to get weird again.

" But it would be WAY COOL if that shout and that trumpet blast were just around the corner, no?" This is an attitude I have just never understood, in or out of TWI. Personally, I am enjoying this life so much that I am really not at all looking forward to the next one. Que sera sera.

"And by the way God considers male and female homosexuality as an abomination and calls the practitioners to come to him and let him change them." What if He doesn't? What if they come to God and remain homosexuals? Impossible? I bet there are a number of peopl who can say that is exactly what has occured in their lives.

I find it very interesting that Jonny boy has issues with male homosexuality but remains silent regarding female homosexuality. Does your Bible abhor only gay men but embrace lesbian women? Or is it simply that you like to watch the women but are terrified of the men?

Very different situation, but similar theme. I saw someone get "reproved", cuss words and all, for praying for a friend who left TWI after the "fall of LCM". I also know of two different families who were counselled to send their children somewhere else to live by TWI. One sent her daughter to live with a sister and one sent a son to live with an ex-husband. They were both given this "advice" because their children were considered "unbelievers". The boy was around 12 and I think the girl was around 14.

"I've heard lots of reasons for slow computers, but this is the best one yet." You thought I was kidding, Paw, didn't ya. But see, Shell, she understands. It couldn't possibly be that the computer is such a dinosaur that even the PC Doctor says we'd be better off replacing it than upgrading or repairing it. It is simply a Michigan thing. Come visit sometime and we'll show ya. :D-->

My mom always made Christmas special, it was her favorite holiday. Being Jewish, she didn't get to celebrate it as a child, so she made the most of it as an adult. She died December 22, 1990. Since then, I have taken over the task of carrying on the Christmas tradition in our family. Some things we kept, many have changed, but we try to keep the emotion of it the same. The tree gets decorated with the ornaments we made with my mom as children. Added to that are the ornaments my own kids have made. The emphasis with the gifts is on the kids, the food is for us. Bagels, lox, eggs, the favorite foods mom made for us when we were growing up. My siblings and I gather under one roof, no arguing, no complaining. We visit, we eat, we play with the kids. It is hectic and exhausting. I love it while it is happening and I am very thankful for when it is over as well.

There is nothing like the ummitigated greed of a young child to remind you what Christmas is REALLY about. LOL Aaron woke up at around 11p.m. on Christmas eve and was up every hour after that for the remainder of the night. Jacob joined him around 2 a.m. From 11 p.m. until 6 a.m. I had hourly inquiries as to whether or not it was time to open the presents. But I am stubborn too, and told them THEY didn't get to open presents until I got to have some sleep. In the end, they won, I finally caved at 6:30 a.m. For all the presents they get, it is never enough. But at the end of the day, why I tucked the two exhausted little imps into bed, they both said it was a great Christmas. Next year, I think the only present I will ask for is a good night's sleep. In fact, next year, maybe I will let them have 8 Chanukah presents, instead of just one, and skip the Christmas presents altogether. :D-->

Robin, it's a Michigan thing. We have the same problem with our computer. We have done the virus checks, adware, spyware, etc. Still runs slow. I have found that I can reinstall Windows 98 and that helps for a time, but as I follow Window's update recommendations, the problem gets worse and worse. At least that seems to be the trend for me.

This is the first year I ever bought ornaments for my tree. Not sure why, cause I sure can't hang everything on it. But other than the few colored balls I bought this year and a couple of ornaments that were gifts, everything on my tree is handmade. We have tons of strings of beads, which we made with my mom when I was a kid. Some of them have broken, but I have kept the beads so I can re-string them with my boys when they get a year or two older. We have wooden decorations that we painted as kids and styrofoam Santa and elves that my mom made. So much stuff, so many memories to bring out every year.

Roy, I do not read all of your teaching posts because I simply do not have the time. But I have read many of your posts and in my mind, you are an incredible example of what I always thought a Christian was supposed to be. Human and imperfect? yes. But also very kind and gentle.

"Most people are of the persuasion that treatment or counseling of the perpetrator is what is needed to end the cycle of child abuse." With respect to SEXUALLY abusing a child (which is the specific abuse this thread was about) I am not at all of the persuasion that treatment or counselling of the perpatrator is what is needed. Statistically speaking, treatment and counselling rarely helps a pedophile overcome their sickness and when set loose upon society, they will likely repeat their crime. I am of the opinion they should be executed.

Yes, change the password to your email account. I had something similar happen to me once, the people stole my email account (got my password) and used it to spam other people. Once I changed my password they were no longer able to use my account.

Actually, Radar, I work part-time during school hours. :)--> I may check into that. I briefly considered homeschooling before either boy ever entered school because I knew Aaron would have a difficult time being confined to a desk. I did and do teach them at home to the degree that they are receptive and enjoying themselves. When Aaron was 3 or 4 I mail ordered all sorts of educational stuff and tried to teach him at home. It quickly became clear to me that Aaron was NOT going to learn from mommy because he was not at all interested in co-operating. I believe the same is true today. I am the person he rebells against and vents all over. He is much more receptive to being educated by almost anyone but me. (Jacob is probably the polar opposite and I probably could teach him, but Aaron would have a cow if I homeschooled his brother and made him go to school). However, this co-oped thing could be an option that would work well for both boys. I will do some research on it and see what I can find in this area. Thanks

"I apologize, as I did not mean to say that bio-children could not have special needs." No need to apologize, perhaps one from me is more aptly due. I really was not trying to "critique" your post - I was venting after a sleep deprived day.

"Bio-children are attached to you, they are attached to belongings, they do not destroy things just to amuse themselves that way a RAD, or EID, or ODD child will." Wanna bet? Yesterday my seven year old spent about five minutes deliberately and intentionally smashing toys to pieces downstairs. I knew he was gonna do it, heard him planning it. I let him, briefly, so he could receive the natural consequence, which is to pay for those toys out of his allowance. I figured if I stopped him before hand all he would learn was to be more sneaky about it. No offense intended, Galen. I could not do what you do. I don't have the patience or the energy. But trust me, bio children who have special needs can be equally destructive. So I guess what I am saying is - I do it because I love my child to pieces regardless of his difficulties. However, I could not and would not willing take on a child who wasn't mine, who had these issues. I admire anyone who can and will.

"hmmmm is this brand new and hasn't come down the pike yet?" I don't know, because until yesterday I never knew such laws existed to begin with. But I did find a website (I think off one of WW links, but I'm not sure now) which basically said that legally Michigan no longer requires schools to provide enrichment programs except on the highschool level. The only way an elementary aged child would qualify for enrichment is if they first qualified under IDEA for an Inidividualized Education Plan - which means they have to be emotionally impared, have a learning disability, or be "otherwise impared" - which is how Aaron qualified. "Dang it Abi, I'm sorry you are meeting all these brick walls." Naw, I haven't hit the brick walls yet, I've only just begun to scratch the surface. It is just a somewhat different battle than the one I had for Aaron so I have to find new methods and learn new rules. It is entirely possible the school will be willing to work out a satisfactory program. So far, they have been great with Aaron (but then, legally they no longer have a choice about that). I am secretary of the Parent Action Committe, I have been to board meetings and met the board members, and I volunteer in the school at least once a week. I am a parent they want to keep, because although I make them work, I am equally willing to work. So I am still hopeful of working something out. At this point I am simply figuring out what the options are and what the best course of action might be. Am I angry too? Yes, very. I am angry because things shouldn't have been allowed to get this bad, and resolving this shouldn't be this difficult. But I also suspect part of my anger is simply bleed over from the battles I have had to fight for Aaron. Now that Aaron was doing so well, I thought I could actually take a few moments to catch my breath. Maybe even work on getting myself back into school as well. Oh well, maybe next semester.

WW, Great minds think alike. Excathedra posted one of those links too. It seems Michigan has done away with its mandated enrichment programs - at least at the elementary school level. Jacob will only qualify for IDEA if he is found to have an emotional imparement, learning disability, or is otherwise impared. I'm not convinced he falls under any of those. ExC, I cannot relax about this. In fact, I was so upset about it Friday night I couldn't sleep. Then I finally let it go, because there is nothing I can do about it until school starts up again after the break. Then I went to work yesterday and I had a message on my voice mail from the school counselor (I am really glad they did at least try to contact me - though it would have been nice if they would have called the house because I was here). Apparently, his afternoon in the office is considered a suspension. That is something that goes on his record and follows him from school to school. I was upset all over again and spent another sleepless night last night. It is very important to me that we do everything we can (within reason) to help Jacob view school and learning as a positive experience - I just do not see how that is possible when they are constantly pushing him to his boiling point and he is constantly in trouble. Anyway, what I can and will do is put together a letter (that is one lesson I learned very well with Aaron - put everthing in writing) to the teacher and principals requesting that they stop removing the educational programs that he does enjoy in an attempt to force him to do paperwork that is way below his ability. This has done nothing to help resolve the problem and has only exacerbated it. In addition I am going to request they do testing to find out what grade level he is functioning at and either move him up a grade or put together some sort of enrichment program to keep him sufficiently challenged and interested. If they will not do those things, I will simply start looking for a school that will. That is the beauty of the charter school system and schools of choice. :)-->

Val - I had my children in a Montessori school, but it closed at the end of last year. Additionally, while both my children certainly learned more in the Montessori setting, my oldest son had a lot of behavioral problems. This year, in a traditional setting, my oldest son is doing great. Whether that is due to the structure of the traditional setting or simply because of his medication and the fact that he is a year older, I don't know. But it is because my oldest is doing so well that I am not ready to just move my kids to a new school. First I will exhaust the options available within the school they now attend. If that doesn't work then I will have to look at other schools. Now, regarding this . . . . "If you give him drugs he will comply, and do exaclty as he is told. Like a good robot. But I did not want to bail my son out that way. With all due respect, some kids truly do need the assistance of medication. My oldest son takes Strattera and it has had an amazing impact on him. Prior to taking this medication he could not sit in a chair through a fifteen minute meal. Additionally, he couldn't read because he couldn't focus on the words on the page. Now he can sit through a meal and is reading above his age level. He is NOT a good robot or a zombie. I have taken great care to monitor his dosage levels to make sure that doesn't happen. He is still plenty energetic and has lots and lots of spunk. The medication did not change his personality - trust me he is no more compliant now than he was prior to taking medication. He is simply better able to control his impulses and focus. However, my youngest son is not hyperactive in the least little bit. I do not believe he needs medication, he simply needs the proper challenge for his ability and some time to mature enough to handle the boredom of pushing paper. Also, I suspect with the weather being cold and the kids being kept indoors more - he needs an outlet to burn off some of the energey all five year old boys have.

"As for Aaron! He must be aware that he's not as good in school as Jacob - at least reading-wise. What can you do to augment his self esteem? I know you're not ignorant in this, I'm just putting it out there thoughtwise." No, no need to worry about Aarons ego just yet. That boy thinks he is an absolute genius and no one is smarter than him - HA! He does well enough in reading as is way way ahead of the game in math and knows that as well. Though I am also checking into some sort of "enriched" program for him in math as well. "IEP's go both ways....IDEA still provides this right for a child that is needing advanced work too." WW - I had no idea that IEP's went both ways - I thought they were only for LD, EI, and OHI. I will definitely check into this and make sure I put it in writing. :)-->

Your turn to pass out! Sushi says its ok with him, we just need to find a bigger place. What? You expected a MAN to object to living with two beautiful women???? LOL And yes, I've been thinking the same thing. When I was in kindergarten we went for half a day and spent most of our time playing. What's up with all this work anyway? I remember someone asking me how much homework Jacob was getting. Homework in kindergarten? Yup, they have it.

"Abi, no I didn't miss the point of the article. The point I was making was that if a Christian or Jewish group tried doing the same, exact thing...but substituting Christian or Jewish culture, practices, making time for prayer, etc.,...and simply not teaching formal religious education...they would be blown out of the water." Maybe. There are certainly those who are extremist in their anti-Christian views who may try to do so. But, the courts would have to allow the school to open or else shut down the other schools which do similar things. I tend to think, despite the craziness of the extremists in this country, the courts by and large do a decent job of handling things equitably. "Didn't you hear about that teacher in Cupertino, California, who was prohibited from passing out the Declaration of Independence in his classroom because it cited a reference to God?" No, I missed that story. But I do know they have recently reinstituted the pledge of allegiance here in Michigan. Additionally, there is all sorts of hell breaking loose in Texas over text books which refer to married couples as "individuals who marry" instead of husbands and wives who marry. (They are claiming referring to them as individuals promotes homosexuality.) The craziness is on both sides of the fence, but again, in general, the courts do a decent job of sorting this stuff out fairly. And I guess these are examples of some of the advantages of charter schools in general. . . "Haven't you heard how much the Thanksgiving story has been perverted in recent years? " Nope. In the school my boys attend, they still pretty much teach it the way I remember being taught. There are some new stories too, but none I find objectionable or offensive. Though I will add, my oldest son has said on a couple of occassasions that he, being white, must be bad because of the history of the African American people in our society. The charter schools in my city generally have a larger minority population, so there is a great deal of emphasis on the history and plight of African Americans and Latinos. Again, not a big deal to me, we just handle those issues at home as they come up. I suspect though, if the kids ever did attend a Jewish charter school, the there would likewise be a greater emphasis on the plight of the Jewish people and again I would have to handle this at home to make sure my children understand not all Christians or Muslims are bad. "And ya know what? No Christmas decorations allowed" I have heard of this happening in schools. But again, in the charter school my kids attend, they had Christmas decorations and Christmas parties. "I am glad that your school system in Mich. is more liberal than the one in Md. and tolerates such things. " I don't know if the public school systems is "more liberal" or not, because my oldest son only attended the public school system for about three weeks before I pulled him out and placed him in a charter school. But it is apparent the charter schools can and do teach Christian culture and history to some extent, even if they aren't necessarily consciously doing so or intending to. Again, I have no issue with this, but I likewise have no issue with the Muslim based or African American based schools as long as they kids are learning and taking pride in who they are without being taught racism or prejudices by the school. p.s. I find it very challenging to teach my children about their Jewish heritage, in part because I too was raised in a Christian culture and was not taught much about it. So, I guess I can understand why people may like the idea of a school which places some emphasis on their specific culture and heritage. Religion aside, I find the various cultures of our world fascinating and would love to see all schools teach more about them. In the long run, I think we'd find, despite all of the cultural differences, we would find there is a tremendous amount of common ground.

"Naberschnig had asked Superior Court Judge Irvin Snyder to suspend the portion of his sentence that includes parole supervision for life. Compliance with Megan's Law mandates, he said, would make it difficult for him to return to his ministerial career." Oh sure, the judge should make it EASY for him to go back to his ministerial career where he can have access to countless more children! Sheesh, what nerve!!!