Dot Matrix

Mstar and Dooj Okay then.... Feels freeing... Dmiller you'd have body parts break off in Minn it is so cold Yeah, sometimes I wear under panties -- sanitary on the furniture and all.... Back in the day Adam and Eve got to do this all the time --- till that whole apple thing -- Glad it wasn't bacon -- then came the fig leaes... So, we are mostly or sometimes typing here - naked, in our under pants, just socks or something-- glad we do not have those futuristic - camera thingies where we see each other on Greasespot Sooo Mstar - what are you wearing?

I like the scroll under terms and conditions. I really like that, did you see it?

Great posts Cindy and Steve --- sweet. Sprawled Out -- I am really happy for you! Pirate --- I have missed you Really everyone -- great heart. I guess sometimes we settle -- fear of being alone OR whatever.... And To love that much --- one has to willing to hurt that much. Notta Thanks for sharing that

Okay Ham And Roni

So, I am on the phone with Excath and I tell her I am not wearing clothes. I thought she would choke to death. Now, I think she doesn't get a chance to walk around naked with a kid at home and all... But given the opportunity -- such as being alone in the house -- I like the freedom. I clean naked, groom the dogs naked -- (you do not want to fry bacon naked --- it is very painful) Nobody is around. I just go for it -- shed my day -- shed my clothes and there I am... Anyone else out there enjoy naked? Well that is the naked truth about me...

Hi John -- Happy Birthday!

That is what I always thought until all this TREE talk.... Then, I thought hey, are they talking splinter as in wood -- ouch I got a splinter in my foot OR the fragment meaning....

The same guy - snowflake Mike- One fall, the brightly colored leaves framed our play with delightful reds and yellows. We raked up piles of the ones on the ground. Then, leaped into the piles, throwing them at each other, jumping and playing. They stuck to the wool of our over-sized sweaters and the smell of them lingered for the remainder of the day. I loved him and I feel he really loved me. And who wouldn't love him? He played guitar and sang. He was hsysterically funny and when we were together we played off each other like a comedy team. He raced motorcycles on a track complete with fans. His family owned their own business. He was fun, handsome and very charasmatic. We had those magic moments people read about in books. He looked at me and the earth stopped spinning and I was important to him. Then of course we broke up cause we were young and he cheated on me.... So, I know how it felt to be loved. I am unsure if I ever was cared for like that again. I think people SAID they loved me, but I never felt it. I just felt in the way or like a piece of furniture I think you feel loved in your relationship Waysider. That is great, it may not be a magic moment but a series of "loving" years. You are a lucky man. Maybe we are just talking about love.... being in it....making it last.... If you are in it now.... If you have ever really felt loved..... One of my friends LOVED a guy who was killed in Viet Nam. She married and had three kids with a man she liked. But she didn't love him and he never really loved her. She is the more common example of relationships I have seen. I did not see your last reply -- I was typing mine to your previous post. I would not say you are lucky to never have been the spark in someone's eyes. But you are lucky to have 25 years of "love"

I mean loved as well as in love -- but with a member of the opposite sex who does not have paws or fins I am glad you feel loved over 25 years rather than had one snow flake moment, that is much better. I am not being clear Waysider I mean have you ever been in a relationship with a human being of the opposite sex and been loved? Cherished? Treasured? Been the spark in someone's eye?

Silly question Being as we have a tree Trunk Limb Branch and Twig And they are all made of WOOD Is that why we call the off shoots - splinters?

Waysider: GREAT observation!

Maybe its not about falling in love as much as its about staying in love Dan Folgleberg asks the question - How do we make love stay? Make Love Stay Lyrics: Now that we love Now that the lonely nights are over How do we make love stay? Now that we know The fire can burn bright or merely smolder How do we keep it from dying away? Elusive as dreams Barely remembered in the morning Love like a phantom flies But held in the heart It pales like the emply smile adorning A statue with sightless eyes. Moments fleet, taste sweet within the rapture When precious flesh is greedily consumed But mystery’s a thing not easily captured And once deceased not easily exhumed. Now that we love Now that the lonely nights are over How do we make love stay? Moments fleet, taste so sweet within the rapture When precious flesh is greedily consumed But mystery’s a thing not easily captured And once deceased not easily exhumed. Now that we loved Look at the moonless night and tell me How do we make love stay?

I love your post pond. I guess I meant an "in love" relationship with the opposite sex. A successful one. Have ever been or now being cherished by the opposite sex? (not a male cat- wink) George, I am so sorry. Those kinds of things rip your guts out

We had neighbors who were in love the whole marriage until death. What I saw with them was, he provided well for the family so there were not money problems, they let the small stuff go, they prayed together and they did FUN things. Like up to the cabin for a fun weekend. He died a couple years ago. She is in her 80's and he was the love of her life. She still talks about him as if he were alive, she is filled with good memories.

That might very well have truth in it!

Thanks JohnJ and DWBH I got in in 1972 in PA. There was just a fellowship run by Eddie Fisher. It was still very sweet, later when we became a limb with twigs and branches. But I recall when it was just people fellowshiping -- I do not remember being called a branch yet. It explains where the sweetness went.... Make way for the craziness..... Thanks guys for taking the time to post that.

Like an eagle I think you are sweet, I hope you find what you deserve in happiness Polar bear You pushed through the tough times and are happy. So, there is a treasure at the end of the perserverence rainbow?

Maybe it is timing and hit or miss... Look at all the love songs about pain-- (But as long as it is a painful love song let me use one with a cool beat that is easy to dance to- wink!) First thing he says is What is love -- followed by Oh baby don't hurt me Just found it interesting Haddaway What Is Love Lyrics What is love Oh baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more Oh, baby don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more What is love Yeah Oh, I don't know why you're not there I give you my love, but you don't care So what is right and what is wrong Gimme a sign What is love Oh baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more What is love Oh baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh Oh, I don't know, what can I do What else can I say, it's up to you I know we're one, just me and you I can't go on What is love Oh baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more What is love Oh baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh Whoa whoa whoa, oooh oooh What is love, oooh, oooh, oooh What is love, oooh, oooh, oooh What is love Oh baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more Don't hurt me Don't hurt me I want no other, no other lover This is your life, our time When we are together, I need you forever Is it love What is love Oh baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more What is love Oh baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more (oooh, oooh) What is love Oh baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more What is love Oh baby, don't hurt me Don't hurt me no more (oooh, oooh) What is love? http://offer.rhapsody.com/?src=cj&pcod...&rsrc=14dFT

Notta You describe him so well, it is easy to see how you treasure each other. I do think that being healthy and lving alone for a little bit to discover one's self can be helpful. Age may also give us clearer perspective

Sorry, I took my own thing off into what makes things fall apart. I guess I want to know if there are happy marriages out there and how they have been able to make it. Keys perhaps. And if it is truly out there. One of my dear friends, a cutie pie to boot, told me she has NEVER been loved and maybe never "in love" she wonders if it is real or something we spend our lives dreaming about. Ex10 - That is sweet. Do you feel treasured? How have you built that in your relationship? Being each other's treasure? No longer lurking - that is great. What is your success? Marrying a friend? Rocky sorry to hear that. I really wanted someone with whom I could laugh, trust and grow old with -- I would cherish that. Excath - I thought you were cleaning your house? I hope love exists for you. I'd like to think you will find it.

Still thinking... I wonder what Vic's mother's fridge top look like? And back then they did not bathe as often.... Ummmmmm

When I was 18 I had a serious boyfriend named Mike. One still winter's day there was a quiest snow falling. No wind and not really cold. We took a long walk by an unused RR track in the woods. At one point, he looked into my face and he kissed/licked the snowflakes off my eye lashes. I never felt that loved again. I do not know if maturity, bill paying and life steals those moments. I do not know why I have never really looked into another's eyes with that kind of honesty. There are great people. Somehow, I do not know how many REALLY connect.... I have had happy moments, funny moments and serious talks. Many times it seems marriage became a bill paying business. It is a shame, for I feel there are snowflakes on all our lashes just waiting to be kissed (so-to-speak) Sometimes I think we come to marriage with unresolved baggage. Such as my litney incl. x-cult member, angry father, mother dying when I was younger, thrown out of the house when my father remarried. That is a lot for a spouse to hunt through. Maybe the key is getting healthy. Maybe "hollywood" love or "movie" love is possible between two healthy people. People who did not hide their hearts away afraid of injury. Does fear prevent us from getting to love? Is it out there? So we begin with it and kill it with fear? What happens to people? Polar Bear how did you get and maintain a happy relationship, what are your secrets? Eyes I feel you... Is staying in love an illusion?

My friend and I had a long talk about this. Are there any REALLY happy marriages out there where the people really love each other? I hear from my friends the "failures" Does anyone have the kind of love where you can look in each others eyes and cherish what you see? Is that just Hollywood? Does anyone look in your eyes and treasure you? Have you ever had that? Or given that kind of love? Is it real or movie love?

PS If it is true about the Vic, the etiology will be of interest.... DWBH Many boys cannot bring themselves to EVEN discuss what happened. If Vic did talk to her about "fondling" it makes me wonder the broadness of that term. Could imply much... And explain a lot about the sexual perversion of our cult. Also in another thread, I cannot recall, Someone posted an article Vic wrote where he spoke of his wealthy family... here you mention his humble beginings which imply poor or lack of wealth. Anyone recall which thread that was in? Skyrider you might recall?

If the Vicster was sexually abused by "his mother figure" it explains a lot to me. To have your wires crossed at such a young age... It can make one prudish or permiscuious and sometimes perverted such as children of alcoholics usually become one or marry one. The sexual problem with a mother doing it to a kid is more rare but does happen. In the book Victims No Longer (to help raped males) A guy in there became an over achiever. Became a doctor by trade after being raped by his father repeatedly in childhood. YEARS later he wanted to see his father to confront him and get an apology.... He nervously waited for his Dad. The Dad shows up and the Dad thought the purpose of the "meeting" was his son wanted to have another romp in the hay. Re: Excath's post And yes Vic was selling "incest" to a smaller group of corps one night in Emporia. But when Excath and I bring it up it has been deleted to help the victim. Maybe he rationalized his own childhood abuse by studying other cultures which say it is okay. Then DOING it to family and us. (My hubs is a behavior scientist and did his paper on male rape) BTW Oddly enough, my fridge has napkins on top....