ex70sHouston

He's 21

My son just read this and made the comment "I woudn't do that to a book". He quicky recovered and said thats not what I ment. "It's gross" I'm just glad his mom wasn't around because she would kill him.

Friday night lights. Last night in a town of 20000 with almost 3000 in attendance was homecoming. Here its really big. Our place kicker is a pretty little soccar player who can really kick a ball. Her little brother is the quarterback. She got a standing ovation when it was announced that she was the homecoming Queen. So we have a football player being the queen.

Logical/mathematical/scientific duh I glad it came up the right way.

A married couple was lying in bed one night. The wife is curled up. ready to go to sleep, and the husband turns on his bedside lamp to read a book. As he's reading, he periodically reaches over to his wife and fondles her special area. He does this several time, but only for a very short time before returning to read his book. The wife gradually becomes more and more aroused. Assuming that her husband is seeking some encouragement she gets up and starts stripping in front of him. The husband is confused and asks, "Why are you taking your cloths off?". His wife replies, "You were rubbing me downtown. I thought it was foreplay". the husband says, "No, not at all". The wife asks angrily, "Well what the hell were you doing then?". The husband says, "I was just wetting my fingers so I could turn the pages in my book".

That would be fine if the legal system worked. I once had a truck stolen by an employee. I called down to San Antonio and told them where the truck was. No action was taken. Finally went down to the city found a cop and pointed to the truck and said that truck is stolen. Got the truck back. I've had my work trucks broken into and stuff stolen from behind the shop. No action. Set up a security camera and got a picture. Police would not do anything because the picture did not show him stealing anything. The phone call I placed to him sure stopped the thefts. The police like to catch a thief. Do they is another story. One time a guy came in and applied for a job. Did my background check and called my buddy the police Lt.. The guy left our office and drove 4 blocks before he was arrested. He was wanted in 3 states. Justice can sometimes be served better at the end a gun or baseball bat.

I just found a true Texan. Yes shop at HEB. Mr. Butt the Baptist who for years wound not sell any alcoholic beverages. Can't really say to much because the chain started here. All kidding aside I shop at HEB twice to three times a week. O course my choices are HEB, WalMart, Albertsons, or Super S. Those are the only stores for 50 miles.

Jim I'll take Texas justice anytime over what you have in California. The real problem is that this was news worthy. Children should be protected at all times. It is everyone's responsibility to protect children. Please note that the only one arrested was the perv. Yes we have justice in Texas

The two most vivid memories of the 60's. A wild crazy weekend family reunion in Lawn Texas. The town at the time consisted of one blinking light at the highway. That was the wekend of the moon landing. I remember watching the moon walk at 11:30 at night in an old farm house. ( I went back by that house 5 years ago. The barn feel down and the ceilings are caving in in the house). But the most fun was going to the local drive in movie. No one and I mean no one watched the movie. It was just one big party back at the concession stand. Breaking down and finnally going to sleep on the sleeping porch at some farm house. The memory that sticks the most was watching Walter Cronkite every friday evening giving the casualty reports from Viet Nam. Us dead 200, ARVn dead 1000, NVA and VC 3000. That and ROTC changed my attitude toward the war. I remember my draft card. I have green eyes but when it got to hair color it stated green also. Still wonder how no one ever made a comment on that. I remember Kent State but I think that was 70 or 71. All that was talked about in class the next day was the shooting. Memories are nice but I have learned to live with my eye on the future.

I was shocked once and blacked out for several minates. I was hit in the head and stunned ti the point that I couldn't move for several minates. What really happened to the guy was his wife hitting him with a frying pan so she could do a short arm inspection to prove he'd been faithful.

The only thing I'll say is don't try it with bad knee's

Its gotta be tacos.

I think half of Texas shows up around here during deer season to hunt. People forget that deer are wild animals. They can tear you open with their hooves. The horns can also make a nasty wound. What usually happens is that deer gets hit by a car and is dazed. Some good samariton goes to pick them up, or take them home only to have the deer come to in a strange place and panic. On one point I have to agree. I quit deer hunting because it became deer harvesting. There is no sport to driving out to a pasture, picking the fatist deer and blasting away. Once I shot 4 deer(the legal limit) in 15 minates. Another time I got two great bucks in about 30 seconds. I do periodicly go out and do game managment. You shoot "X" number of does or bucks to control population. Also sometimes you have to cull a buck or doe. The equipment that modern hunters have available leaves no contest. I do enjoy a hunt where you go out camping and you may not even see a deer for a couple days. I enjoy going out with the guys. Around here I could hunt in my front yard and I live in town. Three years ago I hit a deer with my truck 1/2 block from my house. It jumped and almost made it through the windshield. That was not fun.

Every week end and holiday from the spring through the fall every motorcycle and car club shows up here in the great Texas Hill Country. Why you say. We have hills with views. Valleys with streams and rivers. Roads that go through pecan groves where you can't see the sky. Open range roads where their is livestock on the highway. One lane bridges over the rivers where the tourest stops in the middle and I almost have a wreck when I come around the corner onto the bridge. All of the above on roads that are narrow and seldom traveled. So you want to know which highway? Well start in Kerrville and head south on Texas 16. You will go over Medina Mountain on switchbacks that will hang up anything larger than a single axle. Head down through a narrow road that has a mountain on one side and a gaurd rail on the other. Through a tree lined valley crossing a creek and river several times. When you get to Bandera turn right on FM 470. Drive through the hills until you get to Utopia. Go any direction you want. Its all beautiful. The problem is that there is no set rought. The next problem is take your own lunch. many of these small towns don't have a selection of restaurants. Several don't have a grocery store. Some only have a Post office. You don't understand what rural really means until you find the nearest store is 50 miles away. Stop at historic Camp Verde and see where the army tryed out camels. Go to the YO ranch and see what wild game hunting is all about. Or just take pictures of garaffs on the open plain. See a motorcycle museum that is out all by itself. No town within 20 miles. Go swimming in the Frio River. Frio is cold in spanish and it gets that name for a reason. I can't say enough great things about this area. Well I do know one bad thing. It is unbelievably hard to earn a living here. Everybody wants to move in. Land prices are sky high and the number one industry is retirment.

I did not find the deer funny at all. Deer actually do kill people. That hunter was lucky. Thats why you should hunt with guns and carry a side arm to finsh or in this case start the job. The bottle rocket laucher worked great. The woman parking is interesting. My office is located in a small industrial park. Yet there is a beauty parlor next door. From our experence we have learned to park behind the building. Less scratch and dings that way. I have always wondered how a 90 year old woman who can hardly see and needs a walker to walk can drive a car. O wait a minate. Maybe thats why there are all those wrecks.

There are some people who have the right to own a firearm that shouldn't. I go to carbine and pistol shoots at least monthly. Now this is a true story. I was acting as scorer. The next shooter was Herb. He walks up to position 1 to start the course of fire on the next stage. The Safty Officer asks him if he's ready. Herb reply's yes. The S.O. again asks are you sure your'e ready. Herb again reply'd yes. The S.O. then ask's Herb where his rifle is. The dumb sob walked up to the shooting line and had forgotin his weapon. I now try my best to avoid being on the same sqad as him.

The only thing you use a dictionary for at a BBQ is to light the fire. What ever makes it over the fire is BBQ. Mt preferances are in this order 1 Beef 2 Venison 3 Cabrito 4 Rabit 5 Dove 6 Quail 7 Fish 8 Pork I will bring a goat if you have a place to get gut it. I checked this morning and the going cost for a kid is between $50 and $60. I will do everything if your garbage will handle it and your neigbors don't mind a 22 shoot.

Somebody please explain what was funny? :blink:

Italy beat France in the final. The French captain gave an Italian player a head butt that made world news. Karma. Now I know Baseball is for.............

If ya'll understood and maybe tried the sport you would understand and enjoy the games. If you really want boring watch baseball. Baseball has to be the most boring sport in the world. Its not even a team sport. Its just 9 guys playing separatly with 8 other guys. They just happen to be on the same field.

It worked when I was a kid. Still works at home. Doesnt work to well when your out in public. Some people just don't understand the proper way to beat their children. O well when you forget to give them their pill. Just give them 3 cups of expresso. Works great for 30 minites until they start bouncing.

Actually I drove by a station in San Antonio yesterday where I paid .199. That was 34 years ago but whoes counting. Gas here dropped to $2.69 here yesterday. Down in SA it was only $2.58

Yes I must try this! Some one please tell me how to type with an Indian accent. O' yes, you must try this. Next poor telemarkiter is in much trouble. Never finish sentance. Must repeat. Must repeat.

I needed that right now. Thanks

Three strangers strike up a conversation in the airport in Bozeman, Montana, while waiting their prospective flights. One is an American Indian passing through from Lame Deer; another is a cowboy on his way to Billings for a livestock show;the third passenger is a fundamentalist Arab student, newly arived at Montana State University from the Middle East. Their discusion drifts to their differant cultures. Soon the two westerners learn that the Arab is a devout, radical Muslum and the conversation falls into an uneasy lull. The Cowboy leans back in his chair, crosses his boots on a magazine table and tips his big sweat stained Cowboy hat forward over his face. Finally the American Indian clears his throat and softly spaks,"At one time my people were many, now they are few". The Muslum student leans forward and says"Once my people were few" he snears"and now there are many. Why do you suppose that is?" The Cowboy picks the front of his hat up and says in a smoth drawl,"That's cause we ain't played Cowboys and Muslums yet, but I do believe its a-comin".