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ChasUFarley

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Everything posted by ChasUFarley

  1. I, too, would like additional information. This cancer is something that runs in my husband's side of the family. His father died from a blockage in his colon and lived on a very high-fat, low fiber diet - (a diet hewn from growing up during the Great Depression and from being raised traditional Greek!). In photos I've seen of him, his abdomen is always distended - not like a beer belly, but different. Hubby has the same body type and traits, as do his brother and sister, who are older. I want to know more about prevention, to stop the cycle of this nasty cancer in the family!
  2. Deanna Troi (Waygone calls her "Boobs", is the STNG character you are thinking about, SocketCreep. Kay - I felt like that when I was younger and I also remember when I first got in the Word, I had leadership tell me I had one of the biggest hearts they'd ever seen... but then they'd bawl me out for not dusting properly or some stupid nit-picky thing they needed done. I'd get "built-up" -- as in, told I'd done a good job, I was a great believer and how much God loved me, and then "torn down" on leadership's whim. I'd get screamed at for falling asleep at my desk at 3 AM because I'd been up since 5 AM the previous morning and was working on the Grapevine, or for not following dress code just so, or whatever they felt I'd done. I got to the point where I didn't believe people anymore when they said good things to me or about me, because I knew it was temporary. I knew I would be reminded about what a crummy son-of-God I was in just a little bit, so it didn't matter. It was unrealistic expectations placed on someone who was already driven to achieve success - OR ELSE. Failure was not and still is not option. Shortly after my baby was born, who was also 6-weeks early, I found I could not breastfeed. I tried everything, but it just wasn't possible. OH MY GAWD -- I HAD FAILED AT MOTHERHOOD AND THE KID WASN'T EVEN 6 WEEKS OLD! That's how I felt at the time and it took my a LONG time to realize that Kristopher was going to turn out just fine and I wasn't a bad mother. However, at the time this took place and keeping in mind the lovely time known as post-partum depression, I remember telling hubby how I'd failed and asking him if he felt he'd be able to raise our son on his own, because I was a bad parent. I truly beleived, at the time, that that baby deserved someone better than me. I had several doctors, lactation consultants, etc. tell me that Kristopher would be fine and that I did the right thing, but it wasn't until I saw the little guy was happy and thriving for myself that I was satisfied. Until then, I was emotional hamburger. Come to think of it, that's pretty much how most of the TWI2 leadership treated us emotionally -- grind-'em-up and spit-'em-out. Nothing was good enough. Nothing was satisfactory. Currently, there is another thread on the boards about how TWI tries to make the 'disciples' dependent solely on them. I think that applies to the emotional aspects of how they dictated we were to think, as well.
  3. Last night, after a tough day at work, topped off by a lousey job interview for a position I REALLY wanted, I went home feeling like a wreck myself, to hubby who had an emotional need. He poured his heart out to me about something very, very important to him and I just couldn't respond. The tank was on "E" - empty - I had nothing to give. This wasn't the first time I couldn't reach within myself for something to give. It happens pretty frequently, to be honest. Maybe it's because of my time in TWI? Maybe it's my stoic New England upbringing? Maybe I'm just a cold fish? I don't remember being that way as a child, though. I remember crying with my childhood friends when they cried. Somedays I wonder if I underwent an emotion-ectomy when I was in TWI -- it was all I knew for my adult life, up until the past couple of years. I have a hard time really caring for others, expression love and seem more concerned about "doing the right thing", even to this day. Sometimes, I hurt so bad inside I think there should be blood to show for it, but since there isn't any, then something must be "wrong" and so I dismiss it. To let it out or let my feelings show would be weakness to me... How to begin to crack the shell?
  4. My LC flipped his lid when he found out his bookworm daughter was reading this classic by C.S. Lewis and made her throw it in the garbage. He had no idea that the Chronicles of Narnia were written like the Gospels and the Epistles or that Lewis was a theologian. When I tried to gently enlighten him (hell, the kid was bawling because she loved the story so much), he told me I d better get rid of my worldly ways or I'd end up dead in a year! Come to think of it... that was over 10 years ago.
  5. I don't know if this belongs in the "Stupid Leadership" thread or not... As we were walking to our cars after a bunch of us had seen The Titanic and we were discussing the ending where the main character, Rose, seems to die and sees her "old flame" again. Some were expressing that they were disappointed in the "life-after-death" aspect of the ending. So, I said something to the effect that that could have been considered a dream... Well, my TC started yelling and I thought his head might start doing 360 degree spins when I said that. Good grief, man! It was JUST A FRIKKIN MOVIE!
  6. The cookies are the BEST! I had a friend of mine here at work bake a batch of them for me -- I pulled a few favors for her and since I have "WILL WORK FOR CHOCOLATE" on my cubie wall, she took it seriously. Bless her! The cookies weighed a TON and were rich, chewey, sweet - but not too sweet. Everything a good cookie should be! Word of warning; They do burn easily, so if you have those extra thick cookie sheets - use 'em!
  7. ChasUFarley

    MAINE

    Any Maine-ee-acks out there? I was born in southern Maine, which is also where I got in the Word (and a lot of hot water)!
  8. Hubby, baby and I are in the Lakes Region area and lovin' it!
  9. Programming SNAFUs can be blamed on the phase of the moon!
  10. Well, before everyone had a computer, we had to take the blame for things we did wrong. Personally, I think there's a computer out there somewhere, in some scientist's office, who is tired of getting all the blame. Ah, sunspots -- the new scapegoat!
  11. Martha -- I just went to the BE SEEN web site and they have a note saying that they are having trouble with the chatroom today but are trying to resolve it. SO, IT'S NOT US! Hope that helps!
  12. Yo' mamma so ugly, she walks by the toilet and it flushs itself!
  13. Well, it was a year ago today that yours truly went to the hospital to have that little bundle of grumble, now known as Kristopher George. He'll be a year old on Wednesday, July 3! I'll try to have pictures for you tomorrow -- he's a little heartbreaker!
  14. Well, now I know what Carol looks like! You've written so much about her, I felt like I knew her. BTW -- Sudo, I still think I liked the photo of you in overalls the best... Although the one with you in the laughing gas mask was pretty funny... Your adopted daughter, Chas
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