Just wanted to add that I've found books by Karen Armstrong to have wonderful insights on all these issues, in particular, "The Battle for God - The History of Fundamentalism", and her memoir, "The Spiral Staircase (My Climb out of Darkness)". She was in a convent for 7 years and left to become a world-renown religious history writer. She helped me appreciate compassion being the hallmark of spirituality, not knowledge of the Bible or any other sacred text. To quote Armstrong, "...fundamentalist movements distort the [religious] tradition they are trying to defend by emphasizing the belligerent elements in their tradition and overlooking the insistent and crucial demand for compassion." (The Spiral Staircase, pg. 295). I wish you well, newlife. Look for compassion in any group you encounter. Shake off that fear like an old coat and enjoy your life!