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JavaJane

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Everything posted by JavaJane

  1. Thanks, Sir Guess... I have also heard that raccoons don't like cucumbers... Next year I will probably plant those at the base of the feeder and let them use the stake as a trellis. I have planted a lot of flowers that the hummingbirds love, and now that they are open they are enjoying those as well as the feeder. I so enjoy my hummingbirds - they have no fear at all... Yesterday I was outside on the deck where the feeder is and they were feeding less than 18 inches away from me... and then they started dueling. Such little warriors!!!
  2. For the majority of my life I was defined by TWI because it was my identity. I was involved for over 20 years, from my tweens until my mid thirties... So, for me, I am now finally NOT defining myself by the twi deception. I first started posting here because I needed help, a LOT of help, to overcome twi's influence during those formative years of my life. Am I bitter? Sometimes. When I ask my husband to pray and he says he has had enough of praying, and when I sit in church and have what I know might be a hardness of heart against anyone in a position of authority within a religious organization simply because all of them are suspect of the same things twi leadership did to me and my family. And sometimes when I think about my brother who was thrown out of the house at the age of 16 and who ended up addicted to drugs, an alcoholic, and just got out of prison AGAIN... And when I think about the distance between my family members - not just physican distance, but an emotional distance caused by a lack of trust due to twi... And when I look back and realize I was capable of abandoning all of them, that I walked away and turned my back on those closest to me based on a LIE told by twi.... Yeah, I get bitter. But other than that, I am over it... I think. Maybe... Probably not... I talked with someone recently that I hadn't spoken to in years who was involved in twi - he said it took him as long to recover as it took him to be involved. I said, "GREAT. I still have like 17+ years to go!!!" As far as "defining myself", for me that process has just started. I was raised in twi, and since experiences mold the person, I am in a way, "defined" by these experiences. BUT, I got out. I am raising a child WITHOUT twi. I have a successful marriage WITHOUT twi. I have a relationship with God WITHOUT twi. I have hobbies, and friends WITHOUT twi. And my family relationships are being REDEFINED WITHOUT twi. And these are good things. Maybe at some point I will grow to the point that I no longer think about their deception, but that point may never completely come. So, if I seem bitter, be patient. I went through hell. I hurt people. I was hurt. I know I am capable of being both the abused and the abuser. Oh well... I'm happier now. (And I don't mean to say the rest of you are being hard on people like me, I applaud your mental state and who you have become. Your kind has helped me immensely!!!!!!) Now, where is that waiter??
  3. I agree, God designed us to dream, and I think He does communicate with us through dreams. If I stop and think about the symbolism in my dreams, oftentimes I can understand things in my life better - whether this is from God, or if it is from God in the way I was fearfully and wonderfully made doesn't matter so much to me, I am just thankful for the insight. I always thought this was ridiculous. I also remember that when I asked about it, I was told it was a "modern" thing for married couples to sleep alone. I was given the example that "Uncle Horndog" Howard slept in a one room house with his aunt and uncle, who would have sex there in the same room as the kids. This (I was told) was actually more normal and healthy than having people separate. Yuck.
  4. I'm sure they are spinning it as "our believing and teaching on debt is what has kept the entire nation from complete collapse! If you had heeded the warning we gave years prior to the recession to GET OUT OF DEBT, you wouldn't be in over your head on your house right now... etc etc."
  5. Freedom - freedom to think your own thoughts, freedom to study what you would like from OTHER books than just TWI approved materials (or not study at all!), freedom to define yourself, freedom to express yourself, freedom from trying to convert everyone, freedom to live without having a "coordinator"... freedom to ENJOY your life - I mean REALLY enjoy your life. I thought I was happy in twi. I wasn't. I just told myself that to keep myself in bondage.
  6. So far the motion activated sprinkler has proved to be a good deterrant for the raccoon. It's been up for a week, and the feeder hasn't been drained yet!
  7. might need a bigger gun.

  8. And they make fun of the Catholic monks and nuns who take a vow of poverty in order to help their spiritual journey. Basically it's the same thing - except the nuns and monks know that the Church will take care of them.
  9. I had a new one last night... I was in the auditorium (and you were there, and you, and you....) and I had decided to leave twi before I got there. I had also informed my leadershi this was the last event I would attend. I was there with my iPhone playing games during the service because I was so bored, but I was trying not to let the light from the screen be seen by anyone so I wouldn't get in trouble. After the service, I went out into the lobby where a bunch of my old Way D team were. I was trying to get past them without having to stop for conversation because if they asked me where I was going after the service I would have to tell them the truth - that I was leaving twi, and I didn't want to have that conversation. One of my Way D sisters caught up with me and asked the dreaded question. I informed her I was leaving twi - that it didn't mean I didn't love her, and it didn't mean that I thought she was a bad person. Another person from my past came up and asked, and I explained it to him as well. And another and another. Soon I was surrounded by the believers going all the way back to my first fellowship, and I could tell by the way they looked at me that I was a disappointment. That they thought I was possessed. Then they turned their backs on me and walked away, looking over their shoulders occassionally at me as they whispered to themselves. Some of them were crying. I just walked out, packed up my stuff, and left them behind, knowing they thought I was a terrible person - even worse than a terrible person - they thought I had given myself to the devil and turned my back on God, that I had become evil. Edited to add what I just remembered - there were coyotes outside the auditorium, black coyotes that running in circles around a weak mangy puppy that was trying to get into the auditorium for shelter. But no one saw the puppy but me, and I knew there was no way I could help it because I needed to get out of where it was trying to get in.
  10. Waitress... er, waiter? What's tonight's special?

  11. One of the most freeing aspects of not being involved with twi anymore is that I feel no need to try and convince anyone of anything, including the existence of God and Jesus Christ (I do believe in both and consider myself a Christian.) I believe that everyone has the right to believe what they will. After being involved with an organization that I was convinced had THE ONE TRUTH and then seeing the lies, corruption, lust, and hypocrisy it was really based on, I no longer feel that my own fallible mind can say with any authority that my belief system is better than anyone else's. God can do the convincing. I just try and let the Creator's goodness live in my life. If someone wants to know what that goodness is about, I can tell them, but I no longer feel the need to convince them of anything.
  12. Bolshie, did you spike your coffee with acid again? I don't see any MAN in the coffee (or behind the curtain).
  13. glad you're here and happy about it!

  14. Yes.... BUT, is it a genuine spiritual suspicion?
  15. Welcome to the cafe', HG! Hope you enjoy your stay!! You will not find KoolAid anywhere on the menu here! Have some coffee on me:
  16. Bolshie, I was thinking the same thing.... WOW burgers have been around a LONG time.
  17. Thanks! He is doing better every day. And thanks, skyrider for that educational (and surreal) link!
  18. Well, we caught two raccoons in traps provided by a professional. Then bait started being stolen out of the traps without setting them off. The catch-it guy said he thought it was squirrels. He's wrong - it's a small raccoon - about half the size of the ones we caught. I found him last night on the deck with the hummingbird feeder having a great old time. Husband and I both threw stuff at him from the door - he would run off the deck and then just come right back five minutes later. I ended up throwing a glass of water on him and then going out and getting the hummingbird feeder and moving it to the garage. We live next to a wooded area, and I think the population of raccoons is not even dented by the ones we trapped, and at $130.00 to lay the traps and $70.00 for each raccoon caught, to trap them all will put us in bankruptcy. We are going to try a motion activated sprinkler to keep him off the deck at night.... I'll let you all know how that works!
  19. Nah, he was just planning on using it as a teaching example for Way of Abundance and Power II: The Porno
  20. OK, so what is the deal with a special prophecy over a grandson? I have never heard of this ridiculouness before!!!! (Didn't get in to twi until after the old poop (VP) passed.....)
  21. My parents are still wracked with guilt over what happened to him. I still have slot of guilt for marking and avoiding my family, too, even though it was years ago and they have forgiven me. Just knowing you are capable of doing something so heartless to people who love you messes with your mind! I had one friend who helped me a lot with this, though. I had told her that I was afraid that I could abandon my child at some point because I had abandoned my family (I was not yet a parent at this point) - my friend told me that I would be the last person she would expect to do that because I knew what it felt like to abandon those you love. She's absolutely right. It will never ever happen to me again!
  22. And there I was - face to face with that little masked bandit!! Caught him red handed drinking the hummingbird feeder. I'll give it to him - that sucker is brave!!!

    1. Nottawayfer

      Nottawayfer

      Are you talking about racoons again? I remember friends trapping them while they waiting for game and fish to pick them up. The little suckers growled terribly when I was giving them food for cryin' out loud!

    2. JavaJane

      JavaJane

      Yup, it's raccoons again. We've been trapping them but I think there are a million others living in the woods behind the house, so the trapping is not working. We purchased a motion sensor sprinkler which seems to be working for now. I haven't had to refill the hummingbird feeder in three days!

  23. Her husband only looks like her first husband to her - when you see his reflection (at least for a while) he looks like the guy who's body he took over. I think they sorta jumped the shark with it.
  24. I would love to say that my brother has shaken it all off and is living a successful happy life. But I can't say that. He has been in and out of rehab and prison for most of his adult life, but has remained sober for over two years now and is going to back to college for his degree - that is good. He did manage to graduate high school on his own after he was kicked out. He is a good guy with a good heart, but he has an addiction problem which stems from what happened when he was a teenager. I think twi can be at least partially to blame for what happened to him. Btw, exie - crazy clip!!! Did I see Donna in one bit of footage??
  25. As your links show, while the term "breeders" is correct as far as being a derogatory term used for heterosexuals, to say (as Craig did) that all gays and lesbians use the term is as ludicrous as saying all white people use the n word to describe African Americans. LCM made it sound (to my teenage, niave ears) as if all the gays and lesbians were working together in a secret underground network to systematically overthrow civilization and make us all homosexual.
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