cman

btw-JonnyLingo That was another thing that would cause me to drink sometimes. Someone not responding to my post. Thanks for what you posted. Also I know I missed thanking many personally for their input. Shellon, You are always listened to by me. edit The ones I see anyway...lol...sorry-sounded like a stalker or something-i'm not.

Thanks for the tip on the book Belle! Thanks cool, these obstacles will always be in our way wether with alcohol or something else. I learned that if we are grateful then the good can be found out of things And if we are resentful then it will all be pretty much bad. I was resentful that i had to work second shift, and the type of work that i was doing. That made it a bad job for me. And that is how i felt about it and it stirred other bad things as well. Bitterness and such. Now I'm grateful for the job that i was able to keep with help from others. I'm grateful to have a job! Then I see that there are many good things about it. So, better attitude and a change in my life. A spiritual change. And I know some don't think it's spiritual but it's the SAME JOB. So what changed? Me. Godly attitudes make for Godly changes. Thoughts are spiritual. Can't be grateful or thankful and resentful at the same time. So there is a choice in circumstances.

o and no name tags either :) sure tests my memory...lol these are good people making their lives and others better no one is judged at all in any shape form or fashion-period.

remember that's part of why it's anonymous it's first name basis no one knows where you live or work

in aa you will have a sponser in which to confide and in full confidence that whatever is discussed between the two of you will not be disclosed to any one else this is part of the process to tell of these flaws to another face to face if you hold back then it will not work and of course these things take time there is no pressure to rush it if it's rushed it will not work either my previous post is the truth i gave it as an example

for instance- since twi, i'm very nervous about going to meetings and i was self employed and always got nervous before the job and now i'm employed by a company and still get nervous about showing up for work i don't know why just a feeling of nervousness before even going shopping or out to eat i had become a recluse of a sort so i've at least recognized this and it did drive me to drink to calm my nerves just recognizing it alone just about kills it but i trust God will work in me too perhaps some can relate to this

hi DrtyDzn Please explain this. Perhaps there is that in aa. I've only been going for a short time now. Thanks http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dry_drunk i found this it's these thought processes that are dealt with in aa like i said i've only been going for a short time but i've learned that this is what is being nailed discovered and removed by a power greater then yourself because you haven't done it on your own

i've also discovered other things that help me in aa that has nothing to do with the alcohol itself defeciencies and flaws and i'm learning about that and we all have them

even many in aa have relapsed into drinking so they continue to come back to work on the steps i'm telling you that there is nothing wrong with the alcoholic except the alcohol this is what is discussed and deliverance from is aquired by the thousands now alcoholism is a disease....a dis-ease

and i'll add this it's about progress not perfection no one is perfect if you want to stop drinking and couldn't after trying aa can help, they know how i tried many ways to stop only to stop for a while then start again worse each time i wanted to stop for good because i never could stop at one or two i had to drink the whole 6 pack then even go to the store and buy more and in my insanity i started in on vodka there is something in aa for you if you want to stop drinking you don't have to agree with everything take the steps and be honest

although to some and perhaps jonny it may seem as i put him down aa does not belittle anyone in any way you can even show up drunk and as long as you don't disrupt what is going on no one will even look at you any different then anyone else no one looks at anyone in a spiteful or negative way we've done that enough to ourselves and everyone knows it so sorry Jonny if you were offended by my remarks but they were distasteful and i reacted frickafrack you just don't know what you are talking about you don't know aa it's not what you imply that it is the only requirement to go is to want to stop drinking thanks oilfield and dmiller much thanks to all who posted and it's still open

Hi Pink Lady! Sorry I haven't seen you. I get so focused on one topic i don't look at others. Just a suggestion is to have this man reported to the police for the abuse. If you have the proof that is. The police will take action and arrest this man. I know you may not want him arrested but that is how it works. He has to be arrested for breaking the law.

you are very welcome exc contact me any time ----- and for anyone interested this is what i'm working on it compliments a lot of what i already know it also allows much freedom of thought and help i've read the first 7 chapters in the book they gave me so far and it's online http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/en_tableofcnt.cfm

and i blame no one but myself i almost lost my family suspended from work for 2 weeks without pay if it wasn't for my friend at work and me being honest i would have lost my job sleepless nites peace comes and goes but getting better

frickafrack- you don't know the love exc and i speak of you could ask and no one blamed the bottle it is the person and the bottle and there is more then just one person to look at the problem is in the mind and body stopping drinking is only the start you must not read too well or comprehend and Jonny, i used to have more respect for your comments i hope you can make some that make sense

my friend has no more desire to drink but still goes because she wants to friends are made and progressive relationships-friends it's not there to look for a mate there is a bond there that has happened and not a bond that is an addiction but one that is not forgotten and appreciated hi exc, good to see ya i'm not doing great i have ups and downs still bad times and good it's part of life how we deal with them is the subject dealing with problems or even good times with alcohol it's not the answer for me anymore love

just for the record aa is not to be an addiction itself what is learned there and experienced can stay in your life without the meetings but the meetings are important they sre there for you not you for them for life the things learned there can be with you without the meetings i'm learning and there are non-smokers and non coffee drinkers there too in the beginning go as much as possible my friend who first recommended aa sober for 3 years still goes to meetings sometimes to help and to be helped it is a PROGRESSIVE 'approach' not a one size fits all cure

plus you didn't take it off or smoke which you could have done and even if you did you can try again untill it's beaten people who have quit smoking i've often heard still have the craving for one yet even past the patch they use that inner strength to not do it a person at one meeting talked about her friend who was trying to persuade her to go to a bar but she didn't, she decided not to because she knew what would happen she beat it that day it was hard for her to resist but she beat it she won one day at a time that day she won 4 months without a drink and she beat it another day 4 months of days she won 4 months of moments she won

thanks Linda. What I mean by crutch is that aa can't do it for you. Just like the patch didn't do it for you. You decided to get help and use the patch. So it is you who did it not the patch. I hope this is understood. You decided to do what was needed not the patch.

i'm not promoting this as a bible or something but these are real and true documentations of help received aa is a help not a crutch http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/en_tableofcnt.cfm also God as we understood or understand can change

having admited 1 is the hardest thing to do but some have lost control i am one of them #2 my way has not worked-a power greater then me must intercede aa helps you find that power within i made the decision #3 working on the rest of them probably for life

i'm staying sober,sometimes i want a drink but must not follow through with that thought, so i quit thinking it aa offers support and answers to those who want to quit alcohol alcohol is addictive and abused bad things do happen I agree, but here is a warning to those who drink. There is even one on the bottles.

never brought up ... well till now and you are ignorant of aa, it shows in how you have spoken about it have you ever even read anything in this thread? is your mind so hardened against anyone receivng something that you don't understand are you so dense that you cannot change your mind?

Chas, This is where many start. Confused and lost. Needing direction. Of course that direction is suggestions. because it is up to the individual. Don't be to hard on ignorance. Everyone is ignorant of something. Pond posted and that is worth something. And I can handle it. Not saying for others to not respond. But talking is good.

you are getting closer pond i can go to work after smoking a cig and function normally i can't go to work after drinking and function normally alcohol is more powerful then cigs more impairing of the mind more addictive and worse consequences you are arrested for drinking then driving not for smoking then driving it's ALTERING AFFECTS ARE DEADLY AND SOMETIMES IRREVERSIBLE