GT

The official Frequently Asked Questions (F.A.Q.) about God, with answers: The Official God FAQ

Thanks to the new DST times, my DVR is off by 1 hour. And since it can't dial home to get updates over my phone line (I have a VOIP phone system), it will not record anything properly for the next 3 weeks. Thank you DirecTV for insisting on using a phone line connection rather than using my Internet connection. Dug this out of the time zone data files published by the government which computers use to know when to change their clocks in the comments section:

Pretty easy. Just pick the pictures that answer the question for you. At the end, you find out what kind of person you are (in case you didn't know). Imagini Visual Profile

This is one way to divide the assets in a divorce. German man chainsaws house in two in divorce split Pictures

Explanation: If you took a picture of the Sun at the same time each day, would it remain in the same position? The answer is no, and the shape traced out by the Sun over the course of a year is called an analemma. The Sun's apparent shift is caused by the Earth's motion around the Sun when combined with the tilt of the Earth's rotation axis. The Sun will appear at its highest point of the analemma during summer and at its lowest during winter. Analemmas created from different Earth latitudes would appear at least slightly different, as well as analemmas created at a different time each day. The analemma pictured above was built up by Sun photographs taken from 1998 August through 1999 August from Ukraine. The foreground picture from the same location was taken during the early evening in 1999 July. Source: nasa.gov

Can you read these right the first time? 1) The bandage was wound around the wound. 2) The farm was used to produce produce. 3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse. 4) We must polish the Polish furniture. 5) He could lead if he would get the lead out. 6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert. 7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present. 8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum 9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes. 10) I did not object to the object. 11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid. 12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row. 13) They were too close to the door to close it. 14) The buck does funny things when the does are present. 15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line. 16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow. 17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail. 18) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear. 19) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests. 20) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

This is floating around the Internet in various pieces, but I'll give credit to http://www.cyberslayer.co.uk/jokes/joke0946.html - Only 30% of us can flare our nostrils. - 21% of us don't make our bed daily. 5% of us never do. - Men do 29% of laundry each week. Only 7% of women trust their husbands to do it correctly. - 40% of women have hurled footwear at a man. - 85% of men don't use the slit in their underwear. - 67.5% of men were tightie whities (briefs). - The average bra size today is 36C whereas 10 years ago it was a 34B. - 85% of women wear the wrong bra size. - 3 out of 4 of us store our dollar bills in rigid order with singles leading up to higher denominations. - 13% of us admit to occassionally doing our offspring's homework. - 91% of us lie regularly. - 27% admit to cheating on a test or quiz. - 29% admit they've intentionally stolen something from a store. - 50% admit they regularly sneak food into movie theaters to avoid the high prices of snack foods. - 90% believe in divine retribution. - 10% believe in the 10 Commandments. - 82% believe in an afterlife. - 45% believe in ghosts. - 13% (mostly men) have spent a night in jail. - 29% of us are virgins when we marry. - 58.4% have called into work sick when we weren't. - 10% of us switch tags in the store to pay less for an item. - Over 50% believe in spanking - but only a child over 2 years old. - 35% give to charity at least once a month. - How far would you go for $10 million? 25% would abandon their friends, family, and church. 7% would murder. - 69% eat the cake before the frosting. - When nobody else is around, 47% drink straight from the carton. - 85% of us will eat Spam this year. - 70% of us drink orange juice daily. - Snickers is the most popular candy. - 22% of us skip lunch daily. - 9% of us skip breakfast daily. - 66% of us eat cereal regularly. - 22% of all restaurant meals include french fries. - 14% of us eat the watermelon seeds. - Only 13% brush our teeth from side to side. - 45% use mouthwash every day. - 22% leave the glob of toothpaste in the sink. - The typical shower is 101 degrees F. - Nearly 1/3 of U.S. women color their hair. - 9% of women and 8% of men have had cosmetic surgery. - 53% of women will not leave the house without makeup on. - 58% of women paint their nails regularly. - 62% of us pop our zits. - 33% of women lie about their weight. - 10% of us claim to have seen a ghost. - 57% have had deja vu. - 49% believe in ESP. - 4 out of 5 of us have suffered from hemorrhoids. - The average girl starts her period at age 12. - 44% have broken a bone. - Only 30% of us know our cholesterol level. - 14% have attended a self-help meeting. - 15% regularly go to a shrink. - 78% would rather die quickly than live in a retirement home. - 46.5% of men say they ALWAYS put the seat down after they've used the toilet, yet women claim to ALWAYS find it up. - 30% of us refuse to sit on a public toilet seat. - 54.2% of us always wash our hands after using the toilet. - 23.5% admit they don't always flush. - 45.2% pee in the shower. - 44.9% pee in the ocean. - 28.1% pee in the pool. - 55.2% will let someone else come in the bathroom while they're sing the toilet. - 39% of us peek in our host's bathroom cabinet. 17% have been caught by the host. - 81.3% would tell an acquaintance to zip his pants. - 29% of us ignore RSVP. - 71.6% of us eavesdrop. - 22% are functionally illiterate. - Less than 10% are trilingual. - 37% claim to know how to use all the features on their VCR. - 53% prefer ATM machines over tellers. - 56% of women do the bills in a marriage. - 2 out of 3 of us wouldn't give up our spouse even for a night for a million bucks. - 20% of us have played in a band at one time in our life. - 40% of us have had music lessons. - 44% reuse tinfoil. - 57% save pretty gift paper to reuse. - 66% of women and 59% of men have used a mix to cook and taken credit for doing it from scratch. - 53% read their horoscopes regularly. - 16% of us have forgotten our own wedding anniversary (mostly men). - 59% of us say we're average-looking. - Blacks are more than twice as likely to call themselves beautiful. - 90% of us depend on alarm clocks to wake us. - 53% of us would take advice from Anne Landers. - 28% of us have skinny-dipped. 14% with the opposite sex. - 51% of adults dress up for a Halloween festivity. - On average, we send 38 Christmas cards every year. - 20% of women consider their parents to be their best friends. - 2 out of 5 have married their first love. - The biggest cause of matrimonial fighting is money. - Only 4% asked the parents' approval for their bride's hand. - 1 in 5 men proposed on his knees. - 6% propose over the phone. - 71% can drive a stick-shift car. - 45% of us consistantly follow the speed limit. - 2/3 of us speed up at a yellow light. - 1/3 of us don't wear seat belts. - 12% of men never use their car blinkers. - 44% of men tailgate to speed up the person in front of them. - 25% of us drive after we've been drinking. - 4 out of 5 sing in the car. - The average sexual experience lasts about 39 minutes. - Men say the average erect penis is 10". Women say it's 4". - 56% of men have had sex at work. - 1 in 3 of us have had an extramarital affair. - 62% think there is nothing wrong with affairs. - 60% of men and 54% of women have had a 1-night stand. - The most common fantasy is oral sex. - Women buy 4 out of every 10 condoms sold. - 8% of us have regular anal sex. - 58% like dirty talk during sex. - 22% rent porno flicks at least once.

Who woulda thunk? What American accent do you have? Your Result: The Inland North You may think you speak "Standard English straight out of the dictionary" but when you step away from the Great Lakes you get asked annoying questions like "Are you from Wisconsin?" or "Are you from Chicago?" Chances are you call carbonated drinks "pop." The Midland The Northeast Philadelphia The South The West Boston North Central What American accent do you have?Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

No stop watch required. 2 seconds of gibberish, 3 hours of --- well....it wouldn't get past the censors...

Oh the memories you bring back Ex. I can just imagine what my interpretation would be these days. And I'm pretty sure it would be Way longer than the tongue.

Here's some background on the photo. www.thetrukstop.com/articles/2007/story_behind_the_photo.html

Wounded Marine returns from Iraq to marry his girl. A Wedding Photo

That site wants to install an applet that will have full access to your pc just to play the trailer. I wouldn't recommend it.

Have they written their version of "The Way Living in Love" yet? Seems appropriate, given the BRC style of their headquarters, filled with loving people reaching out to the entire world.

Uploading is copying and also distributing. Read this from yesterday's Morning Sentinel (Maine): Music industry sues Augusta man Unless you're sure the music you want to upload is not copyrighted, I would caution against uploading it.

Irony

Here's an ad that apparently didn't make it to the super bowl.

Speaking of not liking to fly, the article has this at the end: 'We had one man who came with his girlfriend, a nervous flyer, but within a few minutes of take-off she had tapped me on the shoulder and said she was too scared and wanted to go back down again. The following week he turned up with another girl!'

Bellle, Do I want to know how or why you heard about the services in south Florida?

Cubicle? I suspect there is a story there....

Fancy getting intimate at high altitude, but don't like the idea of doing it in a toilet cubicle or fumbling under a blanket in between trolley services? A new company is to offer passengers the chance to join the mile-high club in style - and privacy - on a private jet built for two. Full details: How to ... join the mile-high club

Yeah, I heard it too. If God did make the colts champs, I wish he would quit wasting his time on meaningless football games and do something worthwhile -- like clearing out the children's hospitals or something like that. Do these football players / owners really believe some God gives a crap who wins a super bowl game?

God made the colts super bowl champions? Ain't he such a nice guy? Guess he's a colt fan...