waysider

I think I have it somewhere. I'll try to look for it this weekend.

I'm so sorry, Rascal. Sometimes this stuff just burns me up.

Fellow workers will avoid it for fear of becoming the next target. Human Resources will ignore it if the bully is making profitability numbers look good. In fact, you may find H.R. tends to side with the bully, for that reason. Remember, H.R. does not work for the employees' well-being, they work to protect the interests of the company/organization.

Think about the L.E.A.D. program. The whole thing was based on a foundation of bullying techniques...unrealistic deadlines, unreachable performance goals, belittlement, etc. etc. Hardly what one should expect of a program that (supposed) is designed to enrich peoples' lives.

"Projection Bullies project their inadequacies, shortcomings, behaviours etc on to other people to avoid facing up to their inadequacy and doing something about it (learning about oneself can be painful), and to distract and divert attention away from themselves and their inadequacies. Projection is achieved through blame, criticism and allegation; once you realise this, every criticism, allegation etc that the bully makes about their target is actually an admission or revelation about themselves. This knowledge can be used to perceive the bully's own misdemeanours; for instance, when the allegations are of financial or sexual impropriety, it is likely that the bully has committed these acts; when the bully makes an allegation of abuse (such allegations tend to be vague and non-specific), it is likely to be the bully who has committed the abuse. When the bully makes allegations of, say, "cowardice" or "negative attitude" it is the bully who is a coward or has a negative attitude. In these circumstances, the bully has to understand that if specious and insubstantive allegations are made, the bully will also be investigated. When the symptoms of psychiatric injury become apparent to others, most bullies will play the Mental Health Trap, claiming their target is "mentally ill" or "mentally unstable" or has a "mental health problem". It is more likely that this allegation is a projection of the bully's own mental health problems. If this trap is being used on you, assert "projection" as a defence against disciplinary action or as part of your legal proceedings. It is a key identifying feature of a person with a personality disorder or psychopathic personality that, when called to account, they will accuse the person who is unmasking them of being the one with the personality disorder or psychopathic personality from which they (the bully) suffer." Source

Chalk one up for "more harmony in the home".

Sometimes it's hard to know if you're being bullied. Did the boss pile all that extra work on me (and not someone else) because he thought I was the most capable? Are my deadlines and quotas much tougher to meet than the other employees' because my projects are more critical? .....or am I being set up to fail? All the while, the bully may smile and pretend to have your well-being in mind. When and if the hammer comes down, it all becomes very clear in retrospect. By then, it's too late.

We live in a society that puts a high value on selfish behavior.

People dressed in business suits *tie dye and blue jeans*, many of them about my age, began to fill the rows of seats inside a private meeting room at the Proud Bird restaurant near LAX *local YMCA*. I was brought, along with a couple of other Loyola Marymount students *young adults*, by a pretty girl who had approached me earlier that week after our theater class with a vague but intriguing invitation to come with her to check out some sort of money-making *life altering* opportunity. *modifications to text*

Tweek a few of the details in this article and you might as well be describing The Way. .....my initial excitement turned into hesitation and eventually disillusionment as I began to see the business for what it was.... HERE

If it's any consolation, serial bullies usually target the brightest and the best employees. They leave the slackers alone. (I know, that sounds counter-intuitive.)

"I think the worst part is that the bully rallies other employees against you." This is called "mobbing". When it's reached this stage, the situation is dire. You're trying to beat her at a game she's been playing for 20 years (probably much longer). My personal experience has been that ignoring the bullying does not improve the situation. And, confronting the bully juices them up. They actually like confrontation. It's time to look for a work situation that isn't so toxic. (IMO)

Even when you can document it, there is little that can be done because the law only benefits you if you are part of a protected class AND can prove you were harassed BECAUSE of that. Many of us, for example are part of a protected class--we are senior citizens. You must prove you were bullied and harassed SPECIFICALLY for that reason. That's difficult to do because you don't know the intent that was in someone else's mind.

I might be wrong on this but I believe you're thinking of codependency...quite a vicious creature in its own right but not the same as workplace bullying.

Ham I'm not sure what you mean by "user-supported". The bully is usually someone who has authority over the one being bullied, like a supervisor or manager. My personal experience is that, once the bully sets his sights on you, your chances of winning are slim to none. That'a when you have to ramp up the search for other employment. And, the sad thing is, there are virtually no laws against it in the U.S.A. (Several other major countries do have laws to curb this sort of thing.)

Absolutely. Bullying is at the very core of the TWI lifestyle, once you advance beyond the basic, local twig level. Many people don't recognize bullying because they've been conditioned to think of it as something a school yard thug does or something a group of adolescent girls do to each other. Bullying is much more than that. Some of the worst (most adept) bullies I've ever known are expert at hiding the true nature behind their smiles and deceitful facades. There are hallmark characteristics that identify bully-like behavior. You don't have to look too far to find them in the TWI organization. "God Bless! We sure love you." WBI

It has something to do with visiting the thread to look at poll results.

Thanks, antiscenekid. I'm glad it worked out alright.

Here it is in a nutshell, Nate. The Way teaches that the new birth is the gift. Anyone who has the gift has the latent ability to operate all 9 manifestations. (according to The Way.)

Nate According to Way Theology, the gift is holy spirit (Yes, that's lower case.) which is "Christ in you". The gift is then made known in the senses realm by the actions of the recipient. Those actions are called manifestations. There are 9 of them. (according to Way Theology) They are speaking in tongues, tongues with interpretation, prophesy, word of knowledge, word of wisdom, discerning of spirits, faith, miracles and healings. If you have the gift, you theoretically possess the ability to manifest any and every one of these. Personally, I don't buy it but, since you asked..... BTW.....This is all basic stuff you can find in the book Receiving the holy spirit Today, which is a work that Wierwille plagiarized from J.E. Stiles and E.W. Bullinger.....HERE

One might argue this could have fit in "About the Way" because of how the issue was addressed once the pervert was caught. Thanks.You have a good point. Maybe a Mod could make that decision and move it if it's deemed appropriate to do so. I might consider it horse play ONLY if the penis belonged to a horse and he was playing with it! Now, that there's just plain funny!!

Naked Church Camp Counselor Touches 13 Year Old Boy With Penis; Church Calls It “Horseplay” Read more: http://www.addictinginfo.org/2013/08/24/naked-church-camp-counselor-touches-13-year-old-boy-with-penis-church-calls-it-horseplay/#ixzz2cvl60u2I

I can only speak for myself but, when I became involved with The Way, I felt like I was a part of something bigger than myself. Maybe that partially explains why we allowed them to subject us to unreasonable social criteria. It was a way of rationalizing the sacrifice of our own happiness for the good of the group.

It's 9 below zero and my baby put me down for another man.

Dating in FLO (FellowLaborers of Ohio) Heh! Doing your laundry together was about as close as you could get to an actual date. I mean, you couldn't really do normal stuff, like go out to dinner and a movie or go to a club (no alcohol rule). And, there was the obligatory night twig at 10PM and the midnight curfew. Except, one time, we were "ordered" to go out on dates, one Saturday night. We were encouraged to double date and, of course, the curfew and alcohol restrictions were still in effect. I was 25 years old fer cryin' out loud! What the hell was I thinking, letting them treat me like an eighth grader?